Forever
by Eh Bien
Summary: A sequel to my previous stories, Castaway and Straight On 'Til Morning, in which one small change near the beginning of New Moon takes the saga in a different direction. The series also has an alternate ending, called Blue Moon.
1. Betrothed

**This story is Part Three in a series.**  
**Part 1: Castaway - an AU version of New Moon.**  
**Part 2: Straight On 'Til Morning - an AU version of Eclipse.**

**From there, the story takes two directions. There are two alternate endings to the series.**  
**Part 3-A: Blue Moon**  
**Part 3-B: Forever  
You can read the alternate third parts in either order. They are unrelated and independent, although at times they follow a parallel storyline.**

**When being interviewed about Breaking Dawn, Kristen Stewart said, "Somebody asked me where the story would go, if it were to keep going. If we've done our job right, the rest is boring. They're happy. They're done. There are no more challenges for them, and that's what they've worked so hard to get to." That about sums this story up.**

* * *

I turned right and eased my truck carefully into place beside the gas pump. The gas station was busy, but nobody so much as glanced my way. Forks was full of pickup trucks, and mine wasn't even the oldest one in town.

I knew, having been tipped off by Alice, that Edward was already choosing the new car that was to be my wedding present. He'd apparently narrowed it down to several ridiculously expensive vehicles with vaguely familiar Italian names: Ferrari, Maserati, Lamborghini, Pavarotti, Tortellini... There was a time when the idea of driving a luxury sports car would have made me break out in hives, but I'd moved on. More or less.

My eyes were on the slowly increasing numbers on the digital screen above the gas tank, but my thoughts were elsewhere. My plans for the immediate future were being nailed down, and there was a lot to think about.

There was a wedding on the horizon. Following the wedding, an even more momentous event. I was going to leave my human life behind, become part of Edward's family and be with him forever. I was at the same time overjoyed at the prospect, and a little bit frightened.

A year ago, it would have been the wedding that scared me most, irrational as that may seem, but I'd overcome most of my issues with marriage. It was significant personal growth in a year filled with personal growth. It meant that I was preparing to meet the Cullens and discuss wedding plans with barely a ripple of apprehension.

I replaced the gas cap and hopped back into the driver's seat, pulling carefully out of the lot and turning toward the highway. When I reached a deserted stretch of road, I glanced to my right and was startled to see Edward through my passenger side window. Apart from the fact that his hair was blowing back in the rushing wind, he seemed to be standing still, but I realized he was running, easily keeping pace with my truck although I was driving close to the speed limit. I pulled over, and he hopped into the passenger seat.

"Bella." He said my name as if it were poetry. He smiled at me, and I leaned over to kiss him. I took my time about it; I hadn't seen him since morning.

"What brings you here?" I asked, finally leaning back and catching my breath. "Out for a jog along the highway? It's not exactly pedestrian-friendly, you know."

"Alice saw you coming to the house, and I thought I'd run ahead to meet you."

"I'm glad you did." I pulled back out on the highway. "It's been _hours_."

"An eternity," he agreed, grinning. We both knew how obsessive we were about each other, and we were okay with that. "I also wanted to warn you that Alice has some wardrobe issues to discuss with you."

I grimaced. "For the wedding?"

"Yes. I gather she's finished your dress."

"Oh. Well, we were supposed to be talking about the wedding tonight. We may as well get the clothing and accessories out of the way at the same time."

"Bravely said."

"Alice is easier to face when I have the rest of you backing me up."

"I'll do my best, but I may take Alice's side in some cases. She bought lingerie as well."

I blushed. "I won't debate her on that."

"I'm very much obliged." He gave me a mischievous look, and I giggled.

Edward had once been very circumspect about expressing any interest in the physical part of our relationship. Being officially engaged made it acceptable, according to his 1918 sensibilities, to be a little more forward. It was one part of being engaged that I particularly enjoyed.

I turned down the long drive leading to the Cullen house. Edward was at the driver's side and holding the truck's door open for me before I had time to turn off the engine. I gave a slightly apprehensive look at the front door, and he smiled and took my hand.

"I realize this discussion will be something of an ordeal for you," he said, "and I'm sorry for that. But I can't help feeling just…profoundly happy. I'm planning my marriage to the woman I love." He stopped and turned to face me. "Does it really mean nothing to you, that we'll be promised to each other forever?"

"Of course, it means something to me! You know it means _everything_ to me! It's just that…I considered myself promised to you, forever, a long time ago. The wedding itself doesn't seem like such a milestone to me."

He nodded, satisfied but far from happy.

"I'm sorry we see this so differently. But I will tell you one thing," I said. "Whether or not I see this as a mere formality, when I say those vows, I am going to mean every single word. Every syllable. I wouldn't say them if I didn't. That part is as real for me as it is for you."

His face changed. For a second I wasn't sure if he was going to laugh or cry, but then he smiled and took my face gently between his hands. "I see we agree on the essentials. Thank you, love." He kissed me, and we walked to the house together.

"Bella!" Alice appeared in front of me, seemingly out of nowhere, and hugged me.

I exhaled sharply. "Not quite so hard, please, Alice!"

"Sorry!"

"Welcome, Bella," Esme said, smiling and approaching to kiss me carefully on the cheek. "Have you eaten?"

"Yes, thanks. I had dinner with Charlie before I came." I broke off as Alice grabbed my hand and dragged me toward the stairs.

"Alice!" Edward protested.

"I'll just be five minutes, Edward," she said over her shoulder, pulling me up the steps. "I have to show her the dress before we get started." She pulled me down the corridor and into her room, then flitted into her oversized closet and emerged holding a garment bag. "There!" she said triumphantly as she pulled the bag open. "What do you think?"

I looked. "Wow! That's really…nice."

"Isn't it?" She held the dress up against me, studying the effect. "Such a lovely shade of blue. It suits you, don't you think?"

"It's unusual." The dress was simple, with a wide collar and elbow length sleeves, a fitted waist, and a skirt that fell a few inches below the knees. It was an unusual style. "I don't think I've seen anything like this in stores. It looks sort of old fashioned."

"It is! I bought a dress with the right proportions, and did some renovations. You're looking at an Alice Cullen original."

I grinned, unable to resist her high spirits. "That would explain it."

"I incorporated early twentieth century design elements, for Edward's sake, although it was mostly made with you in mind. But does it work for you? As a wedding dress?"

I studied it more carefully. "Yes. I think it's just right. Thank you, Alice."

Her smile widened. "You're very welcome. Quick, try it on!"

"Now?"

"I want to pin it for alterations. It'll just take a minute!" she added, apparently to someone downstairs.

I quickly slipped out of my jeans and pulled the dress over my head. Alice placed pins faster than I could see, and I carefully removed it again. "There. The fit will be perfect." She led me back down the stairs.

"She likes it!" Alice fell gracefully into Jasper's lap. "And Edward's getting a new suit. You'll make a gorgeous couple."

"Do we need to have the dress ready this soon?" I asked as I took my place on the sofa beside Edward. "I thought the wedding wouldn't be until after we'd moved to New Hampshire." Where I was enrolled, through subterfuge or bribery, at Dartmouth University, along with Edward. The whole family was relocating there, supposedly to keep the Cullens together while the young ones attended college. That was to be the official story.

A few months ago, all this would have been a private conversation between Edward and me, which he would later discuss with his family. Now I accepted the way every Cullen's concerns were the concerns of the whole family, and could discuss personal matters with them as a group, without undue embarrassment. Even before the wedding made it official, I was a Cullen. It had been another big step for me.

"That remains to be seen," Alice said. "Edward had one or two other ideas."

I turned to look inquisitively at Edward. "Ideas?"

He nodded. "I was thinking that we should have it here, before we leave Forks."

"Oh! Why here?"

"So that we could include your parents, for one thing."

I was startled. "Include them? I wasn't even going to tell them!"

"I know, love, but why does it have to be kept a secret from them? I'd like to be able to marry you openly and without deceit, at least as far as we're able. I should approach your father, for example, and ask for your hand."

"Excuse me?" I said incredulously.

Emmett snickered. "You put your foot in it, brother."

"The only person who can give you my hand is the hand's owner! You don't need Charlie's permission to marry me; you only need _mine_, and I've already consented."

Edward just grinned. As usual, he found my anger charming rather than intimidating. "I don't mean it quite so literally."

"It's only a custom, Bella," Esme told me. "Or it used to be."

"I can see why it died out."

Edward laughed at my indignation. "Even in my day, your consent would be the only one that really mattered. But isn't it appropriate to at least ask for your father's blessing, and his approval?"

"You could have your parents at the wedding if you like," Esme said. "It might be nice for them to be able send you off, knowing you were married and happy."

"I understand, but I don't think they'd take it that way. People don't normally get married at eighteen nowadays, not unless there's something, er, wrong." An unplanned pregnancy, typically.

"It would mean a lot to me, to be able to do this properly," Edward said. "I know a certain amount of secrecy is unavoidable, but I would like your family to be aware that we're married."

I hesitated. I didn't like to refuse Edward something that was important to him. He so rarely asked me for anything. But I _knew_ Charlie would freak if he found out.

Carlisle smiled at us. "Perhaps there is a way to present the news to your father, that will make him less anxious."

He laid out his plan, and I had to admit it sounded good. "Can we inform him then?" Edward asked eagerly. "As soon as possible?"

"I suppose so."

"Tonight?"

"What? _Tonight_?" I squeaked.

"We have very little time before we're expected to leave the state. It would be an affront to tell Charlie we're getting married mere days before the wedding. We have to give him a little advance notice."

"Yeah, I can see that." I took a deep breath. "Okay. Tonight."

"But first," Alice said, "we need to figure out the actual wedding. We don't even have a date set!"

"It will have to be soon," Rosalie pointed out, "if we're doing it before we leave Forks."

"Not a problem," Alice assured her.

"But are you absolutely sure you don't want a real wedding, Bella?" Rosalie asked.

"A real wedding? Isn't it going to be real?"

"You know what I mean. A white dress and veil, and flowers, and everything. You don't have to deny yourself, you know. The family's given Emmett and me _five _white weddings."

"So far," Emmett added.

"It's not like we can't afford it," Rosalie told me. "And your first wedding should be exactly the way you want it."

"But it _is_ the way I want it. I'm not doing anything to deny myself."

"Rosalie's convinced you secretly want a lavish wedding, but are ashamed to say so openly," Jasper explained.

"What woman doesn't want a big wedding?" Rosalie countered.

"_I _don't. I asked Edward if we could keep it very small and simple. It was the only way I could feel comfortable with the whole thing."

"It's true," Edward confirmed.

Rosalie narrowed her eyes at me. "Would you even tell us if it wasn't?"

"Of course!" She still looked suspicious. "Look, why would I lie? Alice is dying to throw another big party and dress me up in fifty yards of white lace."

"_Point de Neige_ lace," Alice said wistfully. "With a silk tulle chapel veil."

"I don't like to disappoint her, or any of you; but all that kind of thing just makes me uncomfortable. You're doing me a huge favour by keeping it small and not so...bridal."

Emmett laughed. "Maybe you should've run off to Las Vegas. You could be married by Elvis."

I laughed along with everyone. "No, that would be just as bad. I do take this seriously, you know. Being married is important to Edward, and after I thought about it for a while, it was important to me, too. Making a solemn promise…" I caught Edward's eye and broke off, embarrassed. "But the elaborate wedding stuff just feels like a distraction from what's really going on. Elvis would be just as much of a distraction." I looked around at them. "Do you understand what I mean?"

"Certainly we understand, dear," Esme said.

Rosalie seemed convinced. "Fine, then. I thought it might be Edward again, trying to make you fit the preconceived image." Edward looked at the ceiling. "But it's just Bella, being strange." She grinned at me.

I grinned back. "You mean strange in a _good_ way, right?" She laughed.

One of the most surprising things about the past year was the way my friendship with Rosalie had developed. Once I had a handle on what was behind her frequently nasty attitude, her remarks didn't bother me any more. Like the rest of the family, I waited out her bad spells, sympathetic to her struggles with the life she'd found herself in. And something about the way I'd fought to be part of her family had earned her respect. Maybe because she could empathize with a woman who would do absolutely anything to get what she truly wanted from life - even if it wasn't something Rosalie would have wanted for herself.

Alice seemed to be scanning ahead. "Last Saturday in June?"

"Good weather?" Jasper asked.

"Perfect. Heavy cloud cover all day, but no rain. It can't be a sunny day, if Bella's family is coming."

"We'll have to provide food," Esme mused.

"Should I do something?" I asked.

"I doubt Alice would let you, dear. She loves event planning. But what do you think of the date? Edward?"

Edward nodded. "It's fine with me."

"Will it give you enough time?" I asked.

Alice brushed that away with a gesture. "Please!"

"Okay. I guess we have a date." I looked at Edward, who was smiling down at me.

"Then there's just one more thing that needs to be dealt with," he said.

I sighed. "Okay," I said, standing up resolutely. "Let's get this over with."

Edward and I headed out the front door and back to my truck, accompanied by Carlisle and Esme. The rest of the family followed us to the door, calling out words of supposed encouragement - mostly jokes about Charlie possibly resorting to firearms.

Carlisle and Esme followed us in the big, black Mercedes. "I feel like I've got a hit man on my tail," I said, glancing in the rear view mirror.

Edward chuckled. "I imagine a real hit man would know enough to drive a six year old mini-van. Carlisle's car would be too much of a stereotype."

"Is my wedding car a Mercedes, by any chance?"

"No. Nothing so banal."

I parked at the curb in front of Charlie's house, and Carlisle and Esme pulled in behind me. Charlie looked up in surprise when the four of us came through the front door. He turned off the television and stood up. "Hi, Doc. Mrs. Cullen."

"Please, call me Esme."

"Esme," he repeated uncomfortably. "Didn't know you were coming by." He looked at me questioningly, and I avoided his eyes.

"I hope we're not disturbing you," Carlisle said.

"No! Not at all."

"We wanted to have a word with you, if you don't mind."

Charlie frowned, picking up on the serious tone. "Sure. Come on into the living room. There's nothing wrong, is there? I mean, is this a police matter?"

Carlisle laughed. "Nothing of that kind, no."

We all found places, Edward and me side by side on the sofa, Esme beside Edward, Carlisle in the uncomfortable, straight backed chair no one ever sat in, and Charlie in his recliner. "Would you like coffee or anything? A beer, maybe?" He looked at Esme uncertainly.

She smiled at him, showing her dimples. "Nothing, thank you."

"Okay. So, what is it you wanted to talk to me about?"

Carlisle smiled at us. "I believe Edward and Bella have something to tell you first."

Charlie looked at me again. I realized I probably looked very nervous, and tried to calm myself. Edward squeezed my hand gently. "We have some news, Dad."

"Uh huh." He waited.

I cleared my throat. "We're…" I looked helplessly at Edward.

He pressed my hand again and gracefully took over. "I'm sorry I didn't speak to you about this first, Charlie; but I did want to inform you without delay. I've asked Bella to marry me; and she's agreed. I love her with all my heart; and amazingly, she loves me. I can promise you I'll do whatever I can to make her happy and keep her safe. I hope you can give us your blessing."

We all waited. The presence of Carlisle and Esme kept Charlie from giving way to any verbal excesses, but his expression told me he wasn't taking the news well. We sat and watched him change colour. At last he looked at me accusingly.

"I _knew_ this would happen!" He glared at Edward. "You're pregnant!"

"What? No! Of course I'm not! _God,_ Dad!"

He seemed to believe me. "Okay. Sorry."

"It's all right," I said stiffly.

"Then why? Why now, when you're barely out of high school? If you're not…then what's the rush?" He glared at Edward again.

The truth wasn't really an option. I need to get married before I can be turned into one of the Undead? Edward once again stepped up.

"Charlie, we're going away to college together soon. I want to do that…the right way. It's how I was raised. And I don't want to offer Bella anything less."

Good call, I thought. Charlie could hardly object. "But you're so young!" he protested. He turned to Carlisle and Esme. "Are you telling me you think this is a good idea?"

Carlisle leaned forward in his chair. "In all honesty, yes, we do."

"They _are _very young," Esme said, "but they're both unusually sensible and mature; and I've seldom seen a couple so devoted to each other."

Charlie glanced uneasily at the sofa, where Edward and I were still holding hands. "When people that age get married it…well, it almost never works out. You know that as well as I do."

"True; but Edward and Bella's situation will be a little different from the average young couple's."

"How's that?"

"Well...I've informed the hospital, but it's not generally known: I'll be leaving my position here, and taking one in New Hampshire. Esme and I are moving, along with the entire family."

"You are?" Charlie looked at me, and I shrugged.

"Yes. Alice and Jasper will also be attending Dartmouth; and Rosalie and Emmett are enrolled in Franklin Pierce University. We want to keep the family close, and to be there for all of them if they need us."

"Okay." Charlie frowned.

"Also, Edward and Bella already have a house of their own in Hanover."

Charlie looked at Edward. "You do?"

Edward nodded calmly. "Yes. I purchased it with part of my inheritance. It's convenient to the Dartmouth campus."

"Your inheritance?"

"Edward probably hasn't mentioned it," Esme said, "but his biological parents were quite well off. His portion of their estate was managed for him until he turned eighteen."

"And he spent it on a house." Charlie nodded.

"A very small part of it," Carlisle corrected. "Not that Edward's wealth would be your primary concern, of course, but I thought you should know that Bella will always be well taken care of, materially. My wife and I have provided for Edward as well, in addition to his parents' legacy. We've been fortunate."

"I see." Charlie looked from Edward to me. "I didn't realize you had so much, uh, security."

"I saw no reason to bring it up," Edward said smoothly, "but I suppose it's relevant now. You may rest assured that I can provide for Bella without any difficulty." I rolled my eyes at the old fashioned statement, and he grinned.

"The reason I mentioned it," Carlisle went on, "is that lack of money is one of the things that can put stress on a young married couple. That is not the case here. They have a home, and a very comfortable income. They will not be completely on their own, either: our entire family will be nearby. If they require help or support, they will have us."

Esme added, "Naturally, you and Bella's mother will always be there for her; but you'll be separated from her once she moves away. I hope we can fill in whenever she and Edward need us. We all just adore Bella, and we'll be so very happy to welcome her into the family."

"Absolutely," Carlisle agreed.

"Under the circumstances," Esme said, "they will be able to start married life in a…a sort of protected environment, while they learn to cope with their new role. They can be like any carefree college students, and only gradually take on more adult responsibilities as they feel able. Although, to be honest, I think both of them are equal to the task."

"Yeah," Charlie said thoughtfully. "I see what you mean. It would be easier for them. But still…" He shook his head. "I knew this was coming. I just didn't think it would be so soon."

Edward caught his eye. "I realize this comes as a surprise, Charlie; but your approval is very important to both of us."

Charlie looked at Carlisle and Esme. "You say you'll be nearby?"

Esme smiled at him. "Always."

He screwed up his face. "Okay. You want my approval, you got it. I can't speak for your mother, though." He gave me a slightly sinister grin. "You'll have to break the news to _her_ yourself."


	2. Making Plans

Mom surprised me. At Charlie's rather gleeful suggestion, I phoned her the next day, and gave her the news.

"I thought something like this was coming." She sounded calm, even cheerful. "Have you set the date?"

I blinked in surprise. "Um, June twenty-eighth."

"So soon! Okay, we should be able to make that."

"So...you don't mind?"

She laughed. "I told you, I was half expecting it. The first time I saw the two of you together, I knew it wasn't just a high school romance."

"But what about all the stuff you told me? About not getting married until I was thirty? About not making any decisions like that while I was still young?" About how awful she thought marriage is, for that matter - at least until she met Phil. What happened to my virulently anti-wedding mother?

"Honey, you were never really young. You were _born_ middle aged. And Edward is the same way. I'm not worried."

"Wow. Dad's in for a shock."

She laughed. "Why? Is Charlie making a scene?"

"Just a little bit. Edward's parents came with us to announce the news, and they kind of talked him down."

"Let me talk to him."

I held the receiver out to Charlie, who was sitting at the kitchen table, waiting for the fireworks. He took the phone, frowning.

I sat down in the living room, half listening as Charlie argued briefly with my mother over her reaction. He lapsed into acquiescence very quickly, and answered her questions about the engagement and any details. He filled her in on the fact that the Cullens would be moving en masse to New Hampshire, and that I was marrying into money. "I figured they were well off, but I didn't know they were rich. Like, _really_ rich." He paused to listen. "No, I know Bella doesn't care; but it makes _me_ feel better. One less thing for her to worry about."

After a few minutes, he handed the phone back to me. "She wants to ask you about something."

I took the receiver. "What's up, Mom?"

"I wanted to ask about the wedding. Is it formal? Should I wear...?"

"No, no! Just the opposite. I'm not even wearing a wedding gown, just a blue dress. Street length. It's all very low key."

"That figures. Well, I'm going to phone the Cullens. I think it's polite to make contact."

"Okay. Talk to you soon."

"Congratulations, honey. Give my best to Edward."

"Thanks, Mom."

I sat down next to Charlie, who was slumped on the couch. "That was a surprise."

He snorted. "Yeah. I expected more trouble from Renee. She thinks you and Edward are as mature as people ten years older. I guess she has a point."

"Thanks."

He sat up. "So, what should I be doing for this shindig? Father of the bride pays for the wedding, right?"

"I think the Cullens were going to do that. Alice wants to do all the planning and arranging."

"That doesn't seem right. I know they've got the money, but I should still take on my share."

I wasn't sure how the Cullens would feel about that. "I guess you could talk to them about it."

"Yeah. I'll give them a call. In fact," he square his shoulders bravely, "maybe I'll go over there. I should make a return visit."

"Really? Tonight?"

"Sure. Did you want to come?"

"I was going out to the movies with Edward." I wondered whether I should give them a warning, but realized that Alice had probably seen it coming already.

"Okay, that's fine."

I went back to the kitchen and did the dinner dishes while Charlie went upstairs, returning with his hair combed, wearing a clean shirt.

"You look nice, Dad."

"Oh. Thanks." He grinned at me. "Want to make a good impression on the future in-laws."

I laughed. As I was drying my hands, there was a knock on the door. I felt my heart speed up just a little. Maybe Mom was wrong about the middle aged thing. My reaction to Edward doing something as mundane as arriving at my door seemed very adolescent. I ran to greet him.

Edward was standing in the doorway, smiling at me. My heart picked up speed, and his smile widened. I kissed him, briefly and casually because Charlie was right behind us, and led him in. "I'll just be a second."

He turned to my father, still smiling. "Good evening, Charlie."

"Edward. I was just on my way over to your place."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. I thought I should talk to your folks about the wedding."

"They'll appreciate that, I'm sure."

I came back with my handbag. "Ready."

"Good night, Charlie," Edward said. "Maybe we'll see you at the house later, if you're still there."

"Maybe."

Edward opened the passenger door of his Volvo for me and trotted around to the other side. I watched him climb in and fasten his seat belt. "Is it hard for you to do things slowly? You know - at human speed?"

"No, not at all." He pulled smoothly away from the curb. "The first little while after I was changed, it was a bit of a challenge. But at that point, I wasn't out among humans, anyway."

"Will I have to stay away from people?"

"For a while. You'll have a lot to occupy yourself at first."

I nodded absently. I'd been thoroughly informed about what to expect. "I hope your family don't mind Charlie coming by."

"Of course not." He picked up speed as our stretch of highway cleared, heading toward Port Angeles.

"He wants to take over his share of the wedding."

"Alice will put a stop to that." He looked over at me. "There's nothing to worry about, Bella."

"I know."

He grinned. "Would you rather skip the movie, and listen to the conversation at the house?"

"I don't think I want to be there, really."

"You don't have to be present. We can listen in from outside. Well,_ I_ can listen, and I'll pass the information along."

I hesitated, liking the idea. "They won't mind?"

"Not at all."

"Okay, then."

He left the highway, changed direction and drove back toward the Cullen house, pulling to the side of the road before reaching their property. "You can hear everyone from here?" I asked. It was quite a distance.

"Not quite, no; but I can 'hear' them." He tapped his forehead. "People think the words as they speak them."

"I see. Is Charlie there already?"

"Yes. They're still at the preliminary stages; social pleasantries, and so forth." He laughed suddenly. "Alice is thinking at me, '_I know you're out there!_' She must have seen us decide."

"Hold on." Taking a few seconds to firmly decide on my next action, I opened the car window and leaned out, waving both hands at the house. "Hi, Alice!" I sat back down in the passenger seat. "Will she see that?"

He was laughing. "She did see it. She's mentally waving back." He paused and seemed to listen. "Now they're getting down to it. Your father wants to contribute to the wedding. Carlisle and Esme are trying to convince him they'd love to provide the reception. They're suggesting having it right there, at the house."

"Reception," I repeated, sighing. "I guess there's no way to skip that, is there?"

"Carlisle and Esme have been waiting for this day for decades," he said quietly. "They want to celebrate your coming into our family - something they see as a joyous event. As do I. Please allow them this."

I felt ungracious and mean. "Sure. I'm sorry. I don't mean to be such a wet blanket. It's just that I'm going to be in the middle of all this..."

"...attention?" He chuckled. "I know how you hate that."

"I'll live. And I _do_ love that your family is happy about me joining them. I'm happy about it, too." I leaned over to kiss him, and we lost track of the conversation for several minutes. Eventually I drew back to catch my breath.

"What's happening now?" I asked, partly to distract myself.

"They've steered Charlie toward taking care of the wedding ceremony. Very little money is involved, and it leaves Alice in control of the reception."

"That works."

"They're discussing officiants. Charlie's planning to contact the pastor from his own church. Do you have any objection?"

"No, except that he's Angela's father. She might expect to be invited."

"Are you sure you want none of your friends present?"

"I'd much rather have just family."

He tilted his head toward the house a moment. "Charlie's admitted he hasn't seen the pastor at his church for years, so Esme suggested they ask the Reverend Hughes at the church she and Carlisle attend. It would be an Episcopalian ceremony, in that case. Are you all right with that?"

"Sure. I'm totally non-denominational."

He listened again, smiling. "Alice has established that she has full control of the reception and all style-related decisions, and has suggested Charlie buy a new suit."

"At knifepoint?"

He laughed. "Charlie apparently wants to include some friends of his."

"Like who?"

"He's planning to bring Mrs. Clearwater as his guest."

"No surprise there." Charlie and Sue had been an item for some time.

"He also wants to invite his friend Billy Black, and Billy's son."

"Uh oh!"

"I wouldn't worry. They'll probably just decline."

"I suppose so. Anything further?"

"They're talking about the move to New Hampshire, and our future together. Carlisle's saying..." His voice suddenly changed, not exactly replicating Carlisle's voice, but taking on subtle speech mannerisms that were unmistakably Carlisle's, repeating his words to me directly. "We're planning to leave soon after the wedding. Edward and Bella will probably drive there on their own, but we'll be on hand to help them set up their new home." It was almost like hearing Carlisle speak.

Then in a voice like Charlie's, gruff but heartfelt, he said, "I appreciate they way you're helping them out."

A masculine take on Esme's soothing voice: "We're so happy to have the opportunity."

Charlie: "I was worried about this, you know. But you folks being there for them, that makes a difference. And even Bella's mother thinks this is a good idea. She says they're both very mature for their age."

Carlisle: "I believe she's right. They'll have their troubles, like any married couple, but it won't be due to immaturity."

Charlie: "Yeah. Well, I guess it's fine. I should probably be glad Edward takes this attitude. Most guys his age would just move in with the girl."

Esme: "Edward is very traditional in his views, at least in some areas. So is Bella, in a way, although I don't think she realizes it."

That surprised me. "How does she arrive at that conclusion?" Edward just smiled at me.

I grinned at the low-pitched version of Alice's voice: "So is there anything else you want for the wedding? Any preferences?"

Charlie: "Uh, no; I don't really know weddings. I'm sure whatever you do will be fine."

Alice: "Are you going to give the bride away?"

"Dammit, Alice!" I exclaimed. "He probably wouldn't have thought of that if you hadn't brought it up!"

Charlie: "I don't know. I guess that's the traditional thing."

Alice: "Well, you should talk to Bella about it. She might have a preference."

"Thanks, Alice."

Charlie: "Well, I guess we've covered everything. Should I get in touch with Bella's mom? Anything you need her to do?"

Esme: "We talked to Mrs. Dwyer earlier today. She phoned to congratulate us and go over wedding details."

Charlie: "Oh. Fast action."

Esme: "She seems like a lovely person, and very devoted to Bella."

Charlie: "Yeah, she is that."

Carlisle: "Apparently she was favourably impressed with Edward during their visit."

Esme: "Of course. Who wouldn't love our Edward?" Edward rolled his eyes as he repeated that comment.

Emmett: "You may be a little biased."

Charlie: "Uh, I don't want to give the impression I don't like the boy. I'm just..."

Carlisle: "We understand, Charlie. You're concerned for Bella. It's only natural to be cautious."

Charlie: "Right. Bella, you know, she...takes it seriously. When she loves people, she doesn't do it halfway. She'd walk through fire for them. If this doesn't work out, with her and Edward, I don't know if she'd ever get over it." Edward pressed my hand gently.

Carlisle: "Edward is the same way; and I don't believe it's merely bias. Bella is his whole life."

Charlie, sounding embarrassed: "Yeah, well...I guess they'll be okay. I should take off. Thanks for the coffee."

Esme: "Thank you, Charlie, for coming by."

"He's leaving?" I asked. "Should we move the car?"

"No, he'll be going in the other direction; he won't see us from here."

"Okay. So we're driving to New Hampshire together right after the wedding?"

"That's the tentative plan. Unless you want to take a honeymoon trip first."

"The plan was to change me first, _then_ the honeymoon. Otherwise, we'd have to eliminate some of the traditional honeymoon activities."

He smirked. "Those will have to wait a while, in any case."

I frowned. "Right. While I'm a newborn. I'll really have no interest in you...that way?"

"Not for a while."

"Hard to imagine." He grinned at me. "How long?"

"It apparently varies with the individual, but three months at the minimum. Probably longer."

"I'm sorry." He rolled his eyes. "Well, it _is_ kind of a long wait."

"Not when you've already waited ninety years."

"I suppose it's relative," I agreed. "But after the newborn period is over, things will be back to normal?"

He looked evasive. "Normal is also relative."

"How do you mean?"

"Never mind, love."

"Edward!" Now he had me worried.

"I'm sorry I brought it up."

"Well, now that you have, you need to explain."

He shook his head. "It still feel a little inappropriate, talking to you about this."

"You feel bad talking about your wedding night with your own fiancée? Will that still be a problem after we're married?"

"No, of course not. You must understand, I was brought up to believe that marriage had to come before intimacy. It's more than just a question of morals. Marriage was the way a man could show his love and respect for a woman was genuine. It demonstrated that a man was not trifling with the woman, that he loved her for more than just physical attractiveness; that he intended to give his entire life over to her."

That kind of talk always seemed so oddly captivating when it came from Edward. "But I already know that."

He put an arm around me, and I rested my head against his shoulder. "I know, love, and I'm glad you do. Allow me this peculiarity." He grinned. "Once we're married, I suspect you'll be more bashful about these matters than I will."

I could picture that. "Okay. But explain to me what you meant, using very discreet language, if you have to. I really want to know."

"All right. Once you're transformed, the quality of our, er, physical affection will change."

"Alice told me once that that part of your nature was enhanced, but she didn't explain. She just told me, 'you'll see!'"

"She's right. Among my kind - soon to be _our_ kind - the attraction between mates is usually very intense."

"I'm prepared for that."

He kissed me gently. "There's also the fact that we don't tire. Not just in the sense of physical fatigue, but in the sense of getting weary of doing the same thing for a prolonged period." He laughed at my expression. "The attraction, the desire, never really fades. It is only temporarily displaced by other interests. A vampire wedding night can last, literally, for weeks, the couple taking breaks only when hunting becomes necessary."

"Wow," I said, inadequately.

"It's something of an evolutionary anomaly," he mused. "The purpose of sexual desire, the reason it benefits survival, is supposedly that it encourages the propagation of a given species. That doesn't apply to vampires, of course, and yet they have the most abundant love lives imaginable."

"No practical purpose to it at all," I said. "It's pure gift."

"That's exactly what Carlisle says." He looked at me curiously. "Well, as I said, it doesn't fade, but it becomes more manageable. Eventually, newlyweds are able to organize their lives a bit so they can engage in other activities."

"Like your family does."

"Exactly. They usually divide their time, human fashion, into daytime, when they work, go to school, socialize with each other, and engage in hobbies; and nighttime, which is normally the couples' private time together."

"The _whole_ night, I assume."

"Usually." He shrugged. "I'm afraid that explanation wasn't very discreet."

"I won't hold it against you." I thought a moment. "So you're kind of...holding back for my sake, at this point?"

He hesitated. "I wouldn't put it that way. Our time together is wonderful, and more than I ever expected to have in my life. I'm more grateful and happy than I can even express."

"So am I," I said, nestling closer to him. "But still, it's difficult for you."

"I...will admit that much. I have to stay on my guard at all times. It would be so easy to hurt you in a careless moment. But then, I'm used to restraining myself around you, since the day I first encountered your scent."

"I'm sorry you have to be so careful. It won't be that way for long." I raised my head to kiss him.

"I know," he murmured against my lips. "I think of it often, I confess. I'm the stereotype of the impatient bridegroom." He kissed me, pulling me closer, and I wound my arms around his neck, giving myself over to the embrace, grateful that at least _I_ didn't need to keep my head and be careful.

I tried to press closer to him, hampered by the configuration of the car's front seats. He drew back for a moment, and a second later he had moved to the passenger seat and I was in his lap. "Much better," I said, moving in to kiss him again. He trailed kisses over my cheek and ear, down my throat, while he lightly stroked down my back, over my hip and thigh, and back up again. He always seemed to know exactly how to touch me. I squirmed in his lap, thinking of the many weeks of honeymoon I had to look forward to.

I paused for breath. "I don't suppose you'd consider allowing me another typical human experience, while I have the chance?"

He chuckled. "Which one this time?"

"Well, I've heard stories about teenaged couples and the back seats of cars..."

He seemed to tense a little. "You don't find it too public? I would have thought you'd be nervous of being in the open that way."

"I might, but I'm sure you could know for certain if we were going to be spotted."

"True. But if you mean right now...the family know we're here. They're expecting us to come in and discuss your father's visit."

"They are?" And they might guess the reason if we didn't show up, especially with Alice around. I sighed, disappointed.

"But perhaps we could enact our requisite back seat encounter at another time."

"Thank you. That's very accommodating of you," I said demurely. I was only half joking. Edward had made some drastic changes in attitude in the past few months.

He laughed. "We can't have you lacking any of the usual milestones. And it will be a new experience for me, as well." He shifted again, setting me gently in the passenger seat and returning to his place at the wheel. "But for now, we're expected. As I said earlier, my family are accustomed to placing time aside to interact with the family."

"Right. I suppose it's good practice for me," I joked.

He smiled ruefully. "It's good practice for both of us."

He started the car and headed for the long drive leading to the Cullen house.


	3. Prenuptials

A certain number of odd errands come with being engaged. Today there would be two.

The morning involved an entirely new shopping experience for me. Edward and I were buying our wedding rings.

"Personally, I prefer yellow gold," Edward said, as we drove to Port Angeles in his Volvo. "It's not currently in fashion, but it has a long history as the standard for wedding bands."

"That's fine with me. I think gold is pretty. Some of those silvery metals look too industrial."

"I agree. And the rings should be heavy rather than narrow, I think. They have to last a long time."

I smiled back at him. "Longer than usual." Something occurred to me. "You're not taking us anywhere expensive, are you?"

"What does it matter?"

"I kind of wanted to buy your ring for you."

"You can, if you like. If necessary, the family can set up an account for you on a moment's notice."

"I mean, buy it with my own money. What I earned at my part-time job."

"That's not necessary, Bella."

"I know, but I think it's traditional for us to buy each other's wedding rings, isn't it? And I'd...just like to."

He looked at me curiously. "Why?"

I shrugged. "It's hard to explain, but...I only have a little bit of money left. I closed my bank account yesterday, and I think I have just enough for a ring. It'll be the last thing I ever give you that I pay for by myself. It just seems sort of..._right_ to use the last of my human assets on your wedding ring."

His smile softened, and he reached out to touch my face. "I understand. Very well; I'll choose an affordable jeweller for your sake."

"You were planning to go somewhere with private viewing rooms and velvet seats and stuff, weren't you?" He just laughed.

He pulled in at a chain jewellery store, nice looking but not overtly posh. I took his hand as we walked across the parking lot, smiling back as he beamed at me. I couldn't help but notice his high spirits. It was a surprise to realize than my mood matched his.

"Penny for your thoughts," he joked.

"I'm just thinking how odd this feels."

"Choosing our wedding rings?" He looked concerned.

"Not that, exactly. But if, two years ago, I had tried to imagine buying wedding rings, I would have pictured myself being nervous, embarrassed, or at least just determined to get through it." He nodded soberly. "I would never have imagined I'd be so _happy_ about it."

His smile returned. "You seem to be well and truly over your matrimonial issues."

"About 90%, I think. I'm actually enjoying this part."

"Really?"

"Yep. I can't wait to get my ring on you."

He laughed, his beautiful face so radiant with delight, I had to pause and kiss him before we could proceed into the store.

A woman in her late twenties approached us as we entered, wearing a plastic name tag printed with the shop's logo and the name Elaine. "Can I help you?" she asked. Predictably, her eyes were on Edward.

"Yes, thank you," Edward said. "We're interested in wedding bands."

Elaine's eyebrows shot up briefly and she glanced almost imperceptibly from Edward to me. I could practically hear her thoughts: _aren't they a little young?_ I knew that most of my friends felt the same way. They'd made some indirect comments, the few times I'd seen them since graduation, suggesting they assumed I was knocked up.

Edward cleared his throat, and she answered quickly, "Sure. Come this way, please." She led us to the far wall and stood behind the counter. "Were you looking for platinum, gold, titanium...?"

"Gold, please," Edward told her. She removed two trays of rings and placed them on the counter. Edward turned to me. "Would you like to choose first?"

"Choose yours, or my own?" I asked.

"Either one."

I bent over the selection. At first, they all looked interchangeable; but then I imagined myself placing the ring on Edward's finger, pictured him wearing it, and immediately eliminated more than half: too showy, too cheap looking, too feminine, too trendy. I picked up two of the men's rings. "Either of these would be nice, I think. Which do you like better?"

"Why don't you try them out?" he said, grinning at me and offering his left hand.

Blushing, I tried sliding first one, then the other onto his ring finger. "They're too tight."

Edward turned to the salesgirl. "How long would it take to have these sized?"

The woman dropped her eyes, flushing slightly. "Er...a week, typically."

I knew exactly where her mind had been, my own having wandered there many, many times. _Eat your heart out, lady_, I thought. _He's all mine._ I looked up at Edward and he smothered a laugh at my expression. I must have looked as I felt: blithely triumphant. I moved closer to him.

Edward and I studied the two rings, happily discussing the pros and cons of each, before we agreed on one: an 18k, six millimetre wide band in polished gold, unembellished. "It's just right," I sighed, making Edward's smile widen even more. "Do you have a matching one for me?"

Elaine handed me a smaller version of the same ring, and Edward took it from her. Taking my left hand in his, he slipped the ring on, his face serious. "I think you have that part down pat," I told him, my voice a little unsteady.

"Good to know," he said, looking into my eyes. I heard a faint sigh from Elaine. "But I think it's just a little large," he added more casually.

Elaine carefully measured our ring fingers and promised to phone us when the resizing was finished. "How would you like to pay?" she asked, more businesslike now.

"I'll be paying for my fiancée's ring," Edward said, taking out his wallet, "and she will be purchasing mine."

"Tradition," I explained. Elaine's eyes flitted to me briefly before returning to Edward. She accepted his credit card, handed him a receipt with a big smile, and finally turned to me.

I rummaged through my purse, found my wallet, and began counting out twenties, then tens and fives, and finally going into the zippered compartment to provide the last couple of dollars in spare change. I stacked quarters and dimes on the counter. "...thirty-four, thirty-five, thirty-six," I counted out pennies, "...thirty-seven, thirty-_eight_!" I pushed the mound of cash across the counter.

Elaine accepted it wordlessly, handed me my receipt, and turned back to Edward with another warm smile. "Thank you, and best of luck."

"Thank you very much," Edward said politely. I gave Elaine a sympathetic smile as I took Edward's arm and accompanied him out the door.

"Shall we stop somewhere for lunch?" Edward asked as we drove away. "We have over two hours before our next appointment."

"Why don't we get something to go, and have a picnic? That way, you won't have to pretend to eat."

"That's very thoughtful, but I don't mind in the least. Unless you'd prefer a picnic."

"I think I would. It's more private."

He gave me a smirk. "Are you craving privacy?"

"Maybe a little. This shopping trip has made me sentimental."

He looked very pleased. "We can't let such an event go unmarked." He turned toward the centre of town. "What kind of food would you like?"

His cell phone chimed, and he picked it up. "Alice?" He listened a moment, then said, "All right. I'll tell her." He clicked the phone shut and turned to me. "Esme's made lunch for you, if you'd like. I'm afraid it would mean foregoing our _tete-a-tete_ for now."

"That's okay. We've got that other appointment, and it's more convenient to leave the house together, anyway. And we'll have lots of time for privacy later."

"So we will," he agreed.

"Carlisle doesn't mind going with us?"

"Definitely not. He's overjoyed to perform any task connected to the role of best man."

"He must have liked being asked."

"I thought he would weep. Honestly, I can't believe he was surprised. Who else could I ask to stand up for me? He's been my father, my mentor, and my closest friend since this life began for me."

"Well, I'm going to ask Alice. She's my best friend, and she's gone to a lot of trouble to make this wedding just right. Besides," I added mischievously, "she was all for me joining your family before anyone else would even consider the idea."

"Alice has the advantage of seeing the outcome in advance. Which means she probably already knows she's to be bridesmaid."

Sure enough, Alice dashed up and threw her arms around me the second I came through the front door. "Bella! Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"Oof!"

"Sorry," she said, loosening her grip a little.

"You're welcome, Alice."

"I'll be the best bridesmaid anyone ever had, I promise. Anything you want for the wedding, you just have to say the word."

"You'll probably know what I want before I do, Alice." She giggled and grabbed my hand, dragging me into the living room.

Rosalie glowered and moved to a far corner. I gave her a quick smile and let her be. She was having one of her bad days.

"Hello, sweetheart," Esme said, kissing my cheek. "Were you able to find rings?"

"We were," Edward said, sitting down in a leather chair and pulling me into his lap. "They're being resized, and we can pick them up next week. And," he added to Carlisle, "place them under your care until the wedding day." Carlisle beamed.

Alice perched next to me. "Did you go to _Boîte a Bijoux_?"

"No, to one of the chains off the main road."

"Why on earth?" Alice asked.

"Economy. Bella wanted to follow tradition and purchase my ring herself," Edward explained. "She'd emptied her bank account for the purpose."

"You're not usually so attached to bridal traditions," Esme joked.

I smiled at her. "No, but for some reason I liked this one."

"She paid for the ring in piles of small bills and loose change," Edward chuckled.

Emmett laughed. "Did you haggle with them?"

"I offered them a coupon for a free car wash, and they took five dollars off," I told him.

He laughed harder. "So you're flat broke now?"

"I have exactly eighty-eight cents to my name. That's all the dowry you can expect."

"'She is herself a dowry'," Carlisle quoted gravely. I blushed.

"You don't have _any_ money?" Alice asked.

I shook my head. "Maybe Newton's Outfitters can take me back, short term. They're busy this time of year."

Alice shook her head at me disapprovingly. "Isn't it about time we made some arrangements?"

"It's all ready," Emmett told her. "We were just waiting until the wedding to hand it over, but we can do it now."

"Hand what over?" I asked warily.

Jasper disappeared from the room a moment and returned with an envelope, which he presented to me. I opened it cautiously. "What...?" I removed a credit card, a debit card, and a wad of fifties and twenties from the envelope.

"Don't make a fuss, Bella," Alice warned. "You'd be getting this in a few weeks anyway."

"But..."

"Everyone in the family has access to the Cullen treasury," Emmett told me.

"You'd need to be given an account eventually," Edward said. "Otherwise, you'd have to constantly be going to one or another of us for funds."

"Yes, I guess that makes sense. It just feels kind of...weird." I looked down at the shiny plastic cards in my hand. "What account are these actually linked to?"

"For now, to Edward's," Jasper said. "We can set up one just for you after we move. But you understand, it all comes, directly or indirectly, from the joint family funds."

"We move money around almost constantly," Carlisle explained. "It has to appear to change hands on a regular basis. We don't want to bring attention to the fact that one family controls so much capital."

"You can use these cards for any day to day expenses," Edward said. "If anyone asks, you can explain that your fiancé added you to his account prior to the wedding."

"Okay," I said, suppressing my knee-jerk reaction to being showered with wealth. It was another way I was being brought into the family, and I had to be gracious about it. "Thanks, everybody." I grinned at Alice. "It's nice to be included."

"Now, that's the right attitude!" She grinned back. "For once!"

"The PIN number is 1901," Edward said.

"You're not supposed to use birthdates as PIN numbers," I told him, "but I suppose this one's fairly secure." I tucked the cards and the cash into my purse.

"Would you like lunch, Bella?" Esme asked.

"Thanks, that would be great." I followed her into the kitchen, giving a cautious smile to Rosalie as I passed her. She grimaced back at me. I was learning to distinguish her moods a little, and I could tell she wasn't actually aiming her resentment at me, not today. Just one of her bad days. A moment later she abruptly darted out the door, and Emmett followed.

Esme had made me lobster rolls, a food I was unfamiliar with. "They're very popular in New England," she explained. "I thought you might like to try them."

I sat down at the kitchen counter and took a bite. "This is great!"

She smiled. "There's a second one in the fridge, if you like."

"Thanks, Esme." While I ate, she returned to the little alcove off the kitchen which was ostensibly a sewing room. It seemed to be serving that purpose for real at the moment. There was a half-finished dress of pearl grey silk on a dress stand. I took a soft drink from the fridge and wandered over to look in on Esme.

She looked up from her work. "I'm making an outfit for the wedding," she said, holding up the half-finished garment. "I wanted something new for such a special occasion, and nothing in the shops seemed right."

"It looks really nice."

"And _I_ have to make sure I have a bridesmaid's dress," Alice said, twirling as she came through the kitchen door. "Any preferences, Bella?"

"I _could_ be mean and make you wear an orange hoop skirt or something," I said thoughtfully, "but I think it would be better to leave it in your hands."

"A wise decision," she said, and Esme laughed.

I finished my lunch, then went upstairs for a human minute and to brush my hair. When I returned to the living room, Edward was standing near the bottom of the stairwell. It was time for our second wedding errand of the day: the interview with the officiant.

I'd never met Reverend Hughes, but Carlisle and Esme spoke highly of him. I'd hoped Carlisle would be able to prevail on him to do the wedding, sight unseen; but he conscientiously insisted on meeting with Edward and me at least once before he married us. Carlisle, acting as both father of the groom and best man, came along. We drove to the church in Carlisle's Mercedes, me in the passenger seat, Edward in the back.

"So, what does he want to ask us about?" I asked nervously.

Carlisle smiled at me. "The Reverend Hughes is not going to grill you, Bella. He just wants to meet and ensure you're both eligible to be married, entering into it willingly, and competent to make such a decision."

"So I have a good seventy, seventy-five percent chance of meeting his requirements?"

Carlisle and Edward both laughed. "He also wants to go over your preferences for the wedding service. I told him you hadn't decided whether to have the ceremony at home or in his church. I wanted to leave you the option."

"Oh!" The idea of a church wedding revived a little of my wedding phobia; but then I realized that Edward might like the idea. It would be much more like the vision of a wedding from his human days. I turned to look back at him. "Would having the wedding in church be a problem? You know, for the family?" I wasn't sure what reasons there might be for vampires avoiding churches; maybe it would be rude to suggest it. But then, Carlisle attended services every week.

"No!" I'd guessed right; his face lit up at the idea. "You wouldn't mind?"

"As long as it's just family, not a big crowd, that would be fine. And Esme says the church is really pretty inside."

I saw Carlisle glance back at Edward significantly, and Edward chuckled. I didn't ask, not wanting to intrude on the telepathic confidences between a bridegroom and his best man.

The church was small but attractive and well kept, a modern building with two stained glass windows and a small wooden cupola. Carlisle led us to the house next door and pressed the doorbell. The door was opened by a tall woman with salt-and-pepper hair, wide brown eyes and a forthright look about her. "Hello, Mrs. Hughes," Carlisle said affably. "We have an appointment."

"Yes, come in," she said, moving back from the doorway. "He's waiting for you in his office." She turned and led us through the house and to a closed door. She knocked twice and looked in. "They're here." She held the door open for us, then disappeared without another word.

"Carlisle! Good to see you again." A stout, balding, middle-aged man in a wool cardigan rose from the desk and came forward to meet us, smiling.

Carlisle shook hands with him. "Reverend. You remember Edward?"

"Of course." The minister clasped Edward's hand as well. "And this must be Isabella." He beamed at me, and I couldn't help smiling back.

"She prefers Bella," Edward told him.

"Bella it is. Well, have a seat." He gathered some scattered papers from the chair seats to make room for us, and returned to his desk. "Let's talk about your plans." He opened a notebook, the kind used by elementary school students to practice their printing, with a My Little Pony illustration on the cover. "June twenty-eighth, correct?" We all nodded. "Do you have a preferred time?"

"Afternoon would be better," Edward said.

Rev. Hughes consulted a calendar beside his desk. "Well, I could manage three o'clock, but not much later. There's another wedding at five." He grinned at us. "June usually has a high concentration of weddings."

"Three would be just fine," Carlisle agreed.

Rev. Hughes made a notation. "Excellent. Well, let me talk with these young people for a few minutes." He turned to us. "How did you two meet?"

Edward seemed to be waiting for me to speak. "Um, in high school. We were in the same Biology class."

"And you've both graduated by now, I assume?"

"Yes," Edward said. "We'll both be attending Dartmouth in the fall." That was the official plan, at any rate.

"May I ask your birthdate? And, my apologies, I have to see your birth certificate. I need to see evidence that you're of age to marry." I gave him my real birth certificate, and Edward handed over his fake one. "So you're both eighteen?"

"That's right."

"Old enough to marry, but only just," he said, tilting his head to study us. I glanced nervously at Edward, and he took my hand. "Forgive me for asking, but am I right to assume there is a, er, practical reason the wedding is being arranged in such a rush?"

Edward looked uncomfortable. I frowned a moment, confused, before realizing Rev. Hughes' meaning. "Oh! You think I'm pregnant!" I exclaimed without thinking.

"Well, er..."

"Of course! Isn't that what everybody thinks? My friends. Even my own father!" I wasn't sure why I was so angry. Mostly it was for Edward's sake. He'd been so careful to treat me respectfully - according to his WWI-era mindset - and yet everyone was assuming he was just another lecherous teenager. It seemed very unfair. "Well, I'm _not_ pregnant. And what's more, there's no possible way I could be!" I placed a hand protectively over Edward's.

"I'm very sorry, my dear, for jumping to conclusions." Rev. Hughes seemed genuinely contrite. "Most marriages I consecrate between such young people, on such short notice, are because of...but I shouldn't have assumed."

Edward said quietly, "We want to marry only because we love each other, and want to share our lives. And we want to marry soon so that Bella's father can be involved in the preparations; and so that we are married before we leave for college together."

Rev. Hughes asked us a few more questions. They didn't seem particularly revealing, but after we'd spoken a while, he leaned back in his chair and said, "You're rather a remarkable couple. Especially for your age, if you don't mind my saying so."

"We are?" I said, surprised.

He laughed genially. "Normally, I would make an effort to dissuade very young people from entering into matrimony so soon; but I'm inclined to agree with Carlisle's estimation." I looked over at Carlisle, but he didn't offer any explanation. "Shall we cover the practical details?"

Working from a printed checklist, he rapidly went over our preferences. Which version of the marriage ceremony did we prefer? Which wording of the vows? Would we be adding vows we'd written ourselves? We would not, I told him firmly. It was traditional wording all the way.

Rev. Hughes handed us a photocopy of the vows. "So you can rehearse," he said, pushing himself up from his chair. "Would you care to take a look at the inside of the church? I don't believe Bella has ever seen it." He led us outside and to the building next door, opening the church door with a key on a heavy key ring hanging from his belt.

The interior of the church was charming, not too ornate for my comfort, but also not one of those highly modernized churches full of experimental design features. It was small, with oak pews and a very modest apse at the front. "It's just right!" I realized I'd been using this phrase quite a bit lately. I turned to face the Reverend, thinking I might have been rude. "It's very nice. It's a...comfortable place to be, isn't it?"

He didn't seem to find my comment silly. "I've always found it to be," he agreed. "So you approve of it for your nuptials?"

I looked up at Edward, and he smiled at me before turning to Rev. Hughes. "We do."

We returned to the office, where Carlisle quickly went over the necessary fees and arranged for Alice and Esme to get access to the church a few hours before the ceremony. We shook hands with the minister and was shown to the door by his wife, who appeared again just as we were preparing to go.

"Congratulations," she said to us as we left. "I hope you have a lovely wedding."

"Thank you," I said, turning back. She gave us a jovial little salute, like a boy scout, and shut the door.


	4. Last Minute Details

I was walking through wet grass and leaves, my shoes squelching unpleasantly on the sodden ground. It was dark, but in the moonlight I could make out the shapes of trees and, in the far distance, the faint, glimmering movement of waves. I was near the ocean.

At some level, I knew I was dreaming, but as in many of my dreams, I still felt I had to keep going, trying to find out why I was there, what was going on. I squinted into the gloom, and was able to make out the vague, grey shapes of houses, off in the distance. I realized I was at LaPush. I changed direction and started walking toward the town.

Something, a faint sound or a glimpse of movement, caused me to turn toward the ocean. To my surprise, I saw a gigantic wolf trotting along the shoreline. I knew from experience that this was not an ordinary wolf, but a member of the wolf pack, as they called themselves - Quileute spirit warriors in wolf form. But they usually travelled together, and this one was alone. The words _lone wolf_ came into my mind, then took on visible form and appeared in front of me for a few seconds, like a neon sign. It had a significance I couldn't quite grasp.

I stood still and watched as the wolf ran into the ocean, swam a short distance, then returned to shore and shook itself dry, like a dog after its bath. It began trotting again, this time toward the town, turning sharply to the right before reaching it and travelling in a wide counter-clockwise circle around the dark roads and houses. I waited, with almost no sense of time passing, until it...until _he_ completed his circuit. Somehow I knew the wolf was a he, not a she. He was a pretty russet colour, with shaggy fur. I was sure I'd seen him before, during our alliance with the wolves.

The wolf stood still a moment, his eyes moving over the sleeping town, looking watchful. He was guarding it, I thought. Suddenly he turned and looked at me. He seemed to be waiting for something. "What is it?" I asked. "What do you want?"

"Bella."

I opened my eyes and blinked. It was no longer dark. There was bright sunlight - or as bright as it ever got in Forks - coming through my bedroom window.

"You wanted me to wake you at eight."

I turned to face Edward, who was lying beside me on my narrow single bed. "Right. Thanks." I jumped up and ran to the bathroom.

I returned and sat back down beside him. "Good morning."

He smiled. "Good morning, love." He gently kissed me. "Did you sleep well?"

"Yes, but I had the strangest dream just now." I sat still, trying to remember the details.

"What was it about?"

"One of the werewolves." He looked concerned. "No, it wasn't scary. It was just kind of odd, and a little bit sad. I was near LaPush late at night, and nobody was around except this one wolf. I recognized him from the...you know." From the strange alliance we'd made against Victoria and her home-made army. "He had this reddish brown fur, almost like this colour." I ran a hand through Edward's hair, then stroked it again, momentarily distracted.

He moved closer, bowing his head so I could run the fingers of both hands through his unruly hair. I sighed and cradled his head against my shoulder. "What was I saying?"

He chuckled. "You recognized the wolf with the _extremely _elegant fur."

I snorted. "Well, the wolf was watching over the town. He'd walk around the perimeter, guarding it. But there was no wolf pack; he was by himself, and for some reason, that seemed important. You know how it is in dreams." He nodded. He knew very well, if only second hand. "Then the wolf saw me, and kept looking at me, like he was waiting for something, but he couldn't tell me what it was. It seemed important, like a message. You know, like it sometimes does in dreams."

"You speak as if it were a common experience. You've described dreams to me that were almost like visions, instructive messages via your subconscious. Accurate messages, too, it seems."

I shrugged. "They're just dreams. You know, the kind where you figure out things you didn't know before."

"Bella, I don't think people normally have dreams like those."

"Really?"

"Have you ever heard anyone describe a dream that provided accurate information they didn't have before? Apart from fortune-telling charlatans and such, that is?"

"Well...no."I frowned. "So maybe that's _another_ way my brain doesn't work right?"

He laughed. "I consider it, rather, another way in which you're special." I rolled my eyes, but he grew serious, gently pulling me closer. "One of many," he murmured.

I broke the kiss a few minutes later, needing air, and drew a couple of deep breaths. His sweet scent seemed to warm me from the inside, like a sip of whiskey. Not that I'd know what a sip of whiskey felt like. "Why do you...?" He began kissing my throat, and I lost my chain of thought.

"Why do I...what?" he murmured against my skin. I didn't answer, and he finally raised his head to look at me.

"It doesn't matter." I pressed my lips to the beautiful little hollow at the base of his throat, and he sighed and shifted a bit to grant me better access.

"Tell me," he insisted, but without attempting to break contact.

"Um...I was just going to ask why you smell so good. It's not like any regular nice smell. It _affects_ me. It's like the smell of happiness." I shrugged, embarrassed at the silly metaphor.

"That's nothing," he said dismissively. "It's just lure."

"Lure?"

"Yes. I told you before that I'm the perfect predator. Even my smell is designed to draw you in."

I shook my head. "It's more than that. A predator's scent might be used to attract its prey, or have a calming effect. But why would your scent make me want to, you know..._be_ with you?"

"Does it?" he asked, seeming intrigued in spite of himself.

"Very much so," I said, blushing. "And for the record, none of your family's smell has that kind of effect on me. They just smell sweet and pleasant, and maybe a little soothing; but their scent doesn't get into my head the way yours does. And it certainly doesn't affect me, er, _that_ way."

He stared at the wall a moment. "Interesting."

"Is it? Why?"

He smirked. "You're acting like a vampire again." I raised my eyebrows. "What you describe is the way vampire mates respond to each other's scent."

I stared at him. "You're serious? Vampire couples carry around matching individualized pheromones?"

He laughed. "You could put it that way."

"But will my scent work for you that way - after? I mean, it will be different after I'm changed, right?"

"It will work. Remember, I've known couples who first met and fell in love before one of them was transformed." His hand cupped the back of my head, and he gazed at my face. I stared back, instantly mesmerized. "I'll be with you as you go through the change. While you endure the pain..." He winced and looked away.

"The pain is unavoidable," I said firmly, although I was far from sanguine about the prospect. "It will be over in a few days." He nodded grimly. "But go on. You'll be with me...?"

"Yes. I'll be watching the changes as they occur, and I'll be following the gradual changes in your scent. When it's over, you'll have the distinctive scent that will identify you, more clearly than appearance, to any other vampire. It will be the essence of Bella. And to me, it will be like a distillation of everything alluring about you. Every breath I take in your presence will be like a love potion, one that never loses its effect. And my scent will be the same for you. The way it is now, but much more potent."

I swallowed. I'd never thought of the sense of smell as particularly erotic, but I was rethinking that. "And my scent will no longer make you thirsty."

He smiled. "That's something I look forward to. I will no longer have to restrain the urge to bite. And...I will no longer have to take care not to injure you."

There was a world of promise in that last statement. I could almost hear my heart beat. "That will be wonderful," I said inadequately. I couldn't think of a better way to put it. He finally lowered his head and kissed me, and I threaded my fingers into his silky hair, thankful that Edward and I had reached a compromise on certain premarital activities.

Later, Edward helped me dress - not because I needed help, just for recreational purposes - and we went downstairs. "What time did Charlie leave for work?" I asked. I checked the refrigerator to make sure he'd taken his lunch with him.

"Six forty-five." He snickered. "Did you know Alice is planning to take him shopping?"

"You're kidding!"

"She wants to help him pick out a new suit for the wedding. She doesn't trust his judgment where clothing is concerned."

"Poor Charlie! I hope Alice takes it easy on him." I finished a bowl of cold cereal, rinsed my bowl, and picked up my handbag. "Ready when you are."

Today's errand was to the county auditor's office, to apply for a marriage license. "What I especially like about this errand," Edward confided as we drove toward Port Angeles, "is that our marriage will be completely legal within the state of Washington. I don't have to falsify records to get a license."

"You don't?" I asked. "Won't you be presenting yourself as an eighteen year old?"

"No birth certificate is required in this state," he said. "Just photo ID. My driver's license is perfectly valid. I have to confirm that I'm over eighteen, which I most definitely am; and that I don't already have a spouse, which I most definitely do not. No information is required that I'd have to lie about. I can even use my real name."

"I see. So the marriage will be airtight. No weaselling out." I looked at him sternly.

He grinned and took my hand in his. "That is the least of your worries."

The application process was pretty painless, and Edward and I laughed together over the questions on the forms. Another couple, people in their twenties, were filling out their own documents nearby. The woman caught my eye and smiled at me. "When's the wedding?" she asked me.

"June 28."

"Ours is the Fourth of July weekend. Are you having a big wedding?"

"No, just the family."

The young man looked up from his forms. "We're having two hundred people," he said, mostly to Edward. "Big reception and everything. Crazy expensive, but my girl wants it, so..."

"Say no more," Edward said, giving the man a fraternal grin.

"So you guys aren't doing the big party?"

"No, a small church wedding, then a reception at my parents' home."

The man gave Edward a look of mock envy, and we all laughed. "No," he added quickly, "I don't really mind. I get to marry Donna, that's the important thing."

"Yes, it is," Edward agreed, looking at me.

Donna and her beau took their paperwork back to the auditor's desk. "I feel like one of them," Edward said quietly. "That doesn't happen often."

"One of them? You mean human?"

"Yes. Usually, we're very much apart from humans, even while we're living among them. But right now, I'm just another man making preparations to marry his bride."

"I'm glad you don't have to lie on the application," I said impulsively. "I'm glad our marriage will be official. I'm not even sure _why_ I'm glad, but I am."

He kissed me gently on the forehead. "Esme said you're more traditional than you realize."

"I guess that's a good thing," I said, embarrassed, "if I'm marrying a man born during the reign of Queen Victoria."

We finished the application process and left the building, running into Donna and fiancé in the parking lot. "Good luck!" the young man called to us from his car. "Best wishes, and lots of kids!"

"You too!" I called back. Donna waved to us, and they drove off.

Edward seemed thoughtful as he steered through downtown Port Angeles. "Is something wrong?" I asked him.

"Not really. I was just thinking about what Michael said."

"Who's Michael?"

"The young man who just wished us luck."

"How did you know his name was Michael? Oh, never mind." I sometimes forgot I had a mind-reading boyfriend. Excuse me, _fiancé_. "What did he say?"

"He wished us many children."

I looked over at him. "You still feel badly about that?"

"I'm still a little worried that you do. Or that you will, in the future."

"We've talked about this before, Edward. Can't you believe what I tell you?"

"I can. I'm trying to, at least. It's just that, I know how much that loss means to Esme and Rosalie."

"But not to Alice," I pointed out. "Not everyone is the same."

"No, I see what you mean. But there's also..."

"What?"

He grinned sheepishly. "I'm a little sorry to miss the experience. That's something I never thought of before we met. You'd have made such a wonderful mother."

I rested my head on his shoulder. "You'd have been a wonderful father, too. If we'd met when you were human, I suppose I'd have wanted to have children with you. But at the same time, I don't feel any regrets."

He put an arm around me. "Neither do I, love. I'm done with this speculation."

Edward stopped to pick up food to go, then proceeded to our meadow. We finally had the picnic we'd postponed earlier. We talked a while, then spontaneously lapsed into more premarital activities, then lay together quietly in the long grass for a while. At last, we picked ourselves up, adjusted our clothing, and Edward ran me back to his car at the foot of the mountain.

"Shall we drop by the house?" he asked.

"Yes, let's do that," I agreed. "Alice wanted to talk to me again. I hear she's been to the church."

He laughed. "Yes. Poor old Reverend Hughes!"

As expected, Alice was ready for me with a stack of bridal magazines and some sketches. "Come on. Sit," she said, the second I was through the door. "We have planning to do."

"Alice!" Esme protested. "Bella, have you had lunch?"

"Yes, thanks, Esme. We had a picnic."

Rosalie winked at me. "A little rendezvous al fresco, hmm? A little splendour in the grass? Nice." Emmett snickered. I blushed, but returned Rosalie's smile. She was apparently having one of her good days.

"Look." Alice pulled me to the sofa. "I thought we'd do something like this for the front of the church." She opened a magazine to show me an illustration of an openwork archway, festooned with white flowers and twining leaves. "And this for the pews." Another picture showed church pews, their side panels decorated with pretty, drooping sprays of pink and white, with pale pink ribbons hanging from them.

"Pretty," I agreed. "Will you be able to do all this in time?"

"Not a problem. And how about this for your bouquet?" She opened another magazine to a picture of a bouquet of white roses, in a tight cluster with minimal greenery.

Rosalie sat down beside Alice and looked at the illustration. "Isn't it lovely? You're not wearing the white dress, so it's not like there's an overdose of white," she remarked.

"No, that's true, but..."

"Speak up, Bella," Rosalie said. "Don't let Alice bully you. You should get what you want for your wedding."

"I'm not bullying anyone!" Alice protested.

"I didn't want to carry a bouquet," I told her. "I wanted my hands free during the ceremony. And it's just one more thing for me to drop at the wrong moment."

They both laughed. "You may have a point there," Rosalie agreed.

"But I think my bridesmaid should have one."

"Oh! I can deal with that," Alice said happily.

We covered corsages for the ladies and buttonholes for the gentlemen, table settings and flowers for the reception. "What about music?" Alice asked. "No processional, because apparently you're going all modern and not doing the march up the aisle." She pretended to glare angrily. "Which means your bridesmaid doesn't get to march up the aisle, either!"

"Sorry, Alice," I laughed. "But you can lead me back out of the church afterwards, all right?"

"That will do. What about before and during the ceremony?"

"Edward is the authority on music. I think he should decide."

"Fair enough."

"Where's this music supposed to come from, anyway? Does the church have an organist? I forgot to ask."

"It does," Carlisle confirmed. "I don't know if she's available for weddings."

"We have a family of musicians," Esme pointed out. "I'm sure one of us can play."

"Edward says Rosalie's the best pianist - after himself, of course," I said. Rosalie rolled her eyes. "Would you mind playing during the wedding?"

"I'd love to." Unexpectedly, she reached out and hugged me - more carefully and gently than was strictly necessary.

"Thanks, Rosalie."

"Meaning you and Edward will have to work together on the musical programme," Alice pointed out slyly. "Now, about food for the reception. Bella, that's one subject where you're the resident expert."

"Yes. I'm sorry, I guess you're all going to have to pretend to eat."

Alice shrugged. "We'll be fine. Besides, we're planning to serve the food buffet style. That makes it fairly easy to take food and discard it, so we don't have to actually swallow anything."

"That's a relief," Emmett said. "Did Edward ever tell you how we have to deal with it afterwards?"

"I chose to avoid that topic," Edward said.

"I figured it out for myself," I said, "after I heard the kids at school gossiping about Rosalie. They said she's bulimic." Everyone thought that was hilarious, including Rosalie herself.

"So," Alice went on, "if you, Charlie, and Sue are the only humans there, you might as well choose food the three of you would like."

"Well, Charlie likes fish, and any kind of red meat. He's not that keen on vegetables, although I've been working on him. I don't know about Sue."

"What about you? Do any of these sound good?" She handed me three printed menus, complete with illustrations.

"You've been busy!" I studied the options. One was much too elaborate. The second included a lot of exotic foods I wasn't familiar with, and that Charlie wouldn't trust. "The third one would be just right."

"Thank you, Goldilocks." Alice took menu #3 and studied it. "No problem. Now, what about a wedding cake?"

"Is that really necessary?"

"Just a little one?" she wheedled.

"Okay," I conceded. I found I didn't even mind any more. "Could it be mocha flavour? With buttercream icing?"

Everyone beamed. "Don't you love it when she actually tells us what she wants, just like that?" Alice asked.

"Makes a nice change," Emmett agreed.

"I'm getting better at that." In fact, I loved the way this family enjoyed doing things for one another. I looked forward to the time I could reciprocate.

"What else?" Alice asked.

"Well...no tiny little bride and groom on top, please. Anything else is fine."

"Noted," Alice said briskly. "Now. About the guest list."

"I thought that was settled," I said nervously. "Just the family."

"Well, your father wanted to invite one or two close friends," Esme said. "It might look odd if there's no one included from our side. And...we thought of including our cousins from Alaska."

"You should meet them, Bella, and soon," Carlisle added. "They're like extended family to us, and they'll be part of your life as well."

"I understand. But didn't Alice say that Charlie's friends are probably not coming?"

"That's what I see at the moment. Unless they change their minds. Still a lot of resentment from some of the Quileutes."

"In that case, what if we didn't ask anyone outside the immediate family? What if I met your, er, cousins right after the wedding instead?"

"Met them in Alaska, you mean?" Edward asked. "Yes, I suppose we could make a visit there, before we go to New Hampshire."

"They wouldn't be offended?" I asked. "I don't want to start out on the wrong foot."

"A wedding involving humans and cooked food would be less fun anyway. The honeymoon visit would be more comfortable for them."

"It would," Carlisle agreed. "And the Denali family will appreciate your taking their feelings into consideration." He winked, and I understood that was how he'd present the decision to his friends.

"Sorry. I guess I'm being kind of selfish."

Everyone laughed, and Alice cast her eyes at the ceiling. "By expressing a preference?" Rosalie asked. "For what may be the first time? And about your own wedding? Yes, horribly selfish." She shook her head in mock disgust. "But we'll let it pass, this once."

"Thanks, everybody," I said meekly.

"Don't mention it," Emmett said. "You're family now."

Before taking me back home, Edward brought me a large envelope full of printouts. "I thought you might like to see this," he said. "It's the house I bought in Hanover."

"Oh!" I pulled out the sheets of paper. It was information from the realtor, including photographs. The house was described as New England style, with a clapboard exterior and wide front porch. The interior was beautiful, with high ceilings, double hung windows and a big, sunny kitchen. Photos of the second floor showed a master suite with a dressing room and an enormous bathroom, and two other bedrooms. "That's amazing! We won't actually be living there, though, will we?"

"Probably not, unless our plans change drastically. But our cover story requires that we have a place to live close to Dartmouth. And I _did_ enjoy the experience of purchasing a home for myself and my future bride."

"We'll have to arrange a hideout for you and Edward in New Hampshire," Emmett said, "for after."

I nodded soberly. His simple comment contained a greater significance. 'After,' of course, I would need to hide from the human population for a time, for their own safety, and because I would be red-eyed and unable to control myself well enough to pass for human. And I would have to remain out of sight because I would be presumed either dead or missing. I didn't think too deeply about that part of it. I was trusting the Cullens to deal with it as they saw fit.

"I thought you might like to see the house anyway," Edward said. "And...maybe you'd like to show it to your father. It might give him a little more reassurance."

Charlie was, in fact, very much reassured. Maybe Edward had picked up on his worries about what kind of house this boy might be moving his daughter into.

"This is where you'll be living?" he asked, when I showed him the realtor's papers later than evening.

"This is it. It's close to Dartmouth, and walking distance from the shops and things in the town centre, but on a nice, quiet street. Big maple trees everywhere."

He looked at the printouts. "It doesn't say that here."

"I looked the place up on Google Maps." That was slightly over Charlie's head, so he let it go. "You don't have to worry about me, Dad."

"I know, I know," he said, replacing the papers in their envelope. "Anyway, you're just getting married and going off to college, right? It's not like you're going to disappear off the face of the earth."


	5. Vows

The morning of my wedding dawned just as Alice had predicted: with neither direct sun nor rainfall. I had slept badly, partly because I'd slept alone, for the first time since Edward had returned to Forks - his brothers had taken him out for a pre-wedding hunt during the night - but also because of strange dreams. Outwardly harmless, but ominous. One of those dreams that were trying to tell me something.

I lay still in bed a moment, staring at the ceiling and trying to remember every detail. I'd been back in the woods near LaPush, on a rough footpath through the trees, but this time I was some distance from the town. I felt strange; sick and weak. Looking down, I could see that my arms and legs were stick thin, my ribs protruding a bit underneath my tee shirt. Feeling a little dizzy, I sat down on the ground beside a tree. I heard a sound, and looked up.

There was a little boy standing nearby, a beautiful little boy with auburn curls and deep green eyes. I felt a surge of affection for him, although I couldn't understand why. There was a faint noise in the distance, too far to see. _They're coming for him_, I thought, and felt a strong impulse to protect the child, although I didn't know what I had to protect him from. He was standing on another footpath, one that went in a different direction from the one I was on. He just stood there, watching me.

"Hello," I said uncertainly. He gave me a little smile. "Do you want something from me?"

He shrugged, then turned to look down the path as though preparing to leave. "Wait!" I said. "Where are you going? Is there something you want to tell me?"

I heard a sound behind me, and whirled to find a wolf, the same big, russet wolf I'd seen in my other dream, standing a few yards away. _Lone wolf_, I thought again. I turned back to the little boy, but he had moved some distance down the parallel path, which was winding out of sight into the heavy underbrush. _I'm on the wrong path_, I thought; and then, _No, maybe this is the right one, and the little boy is on the wrong one_. How was I supposed to know? "Which one is the right one?" I shouted to the boy. I turned back to the wolf. "Tell me!"

My anxiety was actually great enough to wake me, and I found myself blinking at the ceiling, weak early morning sunlight filtering through the clouds and my bedroom window. My 'message' dreams were often weird, but they were not usually this hard to understand.

I eventually gave up, climbed out of bed and went into the bathroom. I'd just finished brushing my teeth when I heard a knock on the front door, and a moment later Charlie called up the stairs, "Bells, Alice is here."

Already? I trotted down the stairs in my pyjamas, to find Alice practically lighting up the room with manic energy. "Happy wedding day!" she sang, hugging me. "Quick, get some clothes on. We've got things to do."

"Why so early?" I asked."The wedding isn't for almost seven hours!" She just put her hands on her hips and stared at me, tapping her foot. "Can I least get some breakfast first?"

"Esme has a lovely breakfast waiting for you at the house. After that, we have a bubble bath and spa treatments; then we're doing your hair and makeup, and _then_ we're getting you dressed and taking you to the church."

"Sounds like she's got it all worked out," Charlie said, leaning against the kitchen doorway and looking amused.

I obediently headed back up the stairs. "And be there promptly at 2:30," Alice told Charlie as I went. "Don't put your suit on until the last minute."

"Yes, ma'am," Charlie said, saluting smartly. "And thanks again for the car loan." Esme had left her Jaguar for Charlie, so he didn't have to arrive at the wedding in the police cruiser. He'd made a token protest, but was obviously looking forward to picking up Sue in a shiny new Jag.

Alice followed me up the stairs and watched with a critical eye as I dressed. I'd given up being inhibited in front of Alice; nudity seemed to mean nothing to her. "You've gained almost all your weight back," she noted approvingly. "You look good."

"Thanks. Carbs and a sedentary lifestyle, that's my secret." She giggled.

She raised an eyebrow as I pulled on my favourite old jeans and the Dartmouth University tee shirt Charlie had bought me. "Don't give me the disapproving look," I told her. "This is all I have left." The rest of my clothing, apart from what Alice had deemed unwearable and thrown away, had been packed up and carted over to the Cullen house in preparation for the upcoming move.

"Fine," she said. "You won't have it on for long, anyway."

I paused to take a look around the room. "Did you lose something?" she asked.

"No; I'm just making sure I'm not leaving anything I might need. I won't be coming back to the house." That fact struck me for the first time. I was leaving my father's home for good, and moving into my husband's. Today.

Alice must have picked up on my reaction. "It's a big change."

"Yeah."

"Are you freaking out? Should I get you a cup of tea or something?" she asked uncertainly.

I laughed. "No, I'm not freaking out. Just reality setting in." I headed resolutely for the stairs. "It's nothing. Let's go."

Charlie was standing in the kitchen to see us off. "See you two later."

"Bye, Charlie!" Alice led me to the door.

I stopped and turned back. "Just a second, Alice." I went back to Charlie. "Look, Dad, I might not get a chance to talk to you before we leave, you know, after the wedding. I just wanted to tell you how glad I am that I decided to come live with you. You've been so great. Best dad anyone ever had."

I threw my arms around his neck, and he hugged me tightly. "Love you, Bells," he muttered indistinctly against my shoulder.

"I love you too, Dad." I knew saying these things was still hard for Charlie; but I'd come out of my shell a bit in the past few months, and I thought it was an important thing to say, even if he found it embarrassing. "Thanks for everything."

He finally let me go and immediately stepped back, his arms crossed, looking grumpy. "See you at the church!" I said.

"Yep."

I followed Alice to the car - she was driving Edward's Aston Martin, his special occasion car - and she hopped into the driver's seat and took off before I had my seat belt fastened. "Are you sure you're okay?" she asked, as I wiped away a tear.

"I'm perfect. Just a little sentimental. Brides are allowed to get sentimental, right?"

She grinned. "Absolutely. So are mothers of the groom." She giggled. "Esme's being _very_ emotional about the marriage. Well, understandably. This is something she's wanted for Edward for so long."

We rode along in companionable silence a minute or two, then Alice said, "Last chance, Bella, if you have any questions."

"Questions? About the wedding?"

"About the honeymoon."

"I think I know about the honeymoon. We're going up to Alaska..."

"Not the trip, Bella."

"Oh!" I turned red. "But are you the one I should ask?"

"I'm a married woman, Bella. A married _vampire,_ to be specific. And I'll bet there are one or two things you wouldn't ask Edward directly."

I realized there were. We had a very interesting conversation for the duration of the trip.

At the house, I was greeted with the warmest possible affection by Rosalie and Esme. The male members of the family were still on their bachelor party-slash-hunt. Esme led me to the kitchen, where I was provided with an amazing breakfast that involved fresh strawberries, then I was handed over to Alice and taken upstairs.

Alice wasn't kidding about the spa treatments. After a bath and a shampoo, I was given a silk bathrobe and laid out on a chaise longue in Alice's room, where I was told to just lie back and think happy thoughts. Moisturizers were applied. Some kind of preparation that looked like green mud was spread over my face and an eye mask put over my eyes while I was given a pedicure and manicure. At one point, I realized my left hand and right foot were being worked on at the same time. "Alice? Is someone else here?"

"Me," I heard Rosalie's voice say. "I thought I'd pitch in. If you don't mind, that is."

"No, of course not. Thanks, Rosalie." It seemed like she was having a particularly good day.

"I'm going to have Rosalie do your hair," Alice said. "She's better at it than I am."

"It must pain you to make that admission," I said, and Rosalie laughed. She tilted her head as if listening. "They're home."

"Hello, carousing groomsmen!" Alice called out quietly, plying her emery board. "Welcome home! No, Edward, don't even _think_ about coming in here! You don't see Bella until the wedding."

"Besides," I added, "they have my face covered in some kind of pond scum. You'd probably run away screaming."

"'O, that I were I a wad of pond scum'," Alice misquoted in a ham actor's voice, "'that I might touch that cheek!'" She and Rosalie both burst out laughing at whatever response came from downstairs.

"I'll be glad when _my_ hearing improves," I remarked from under my eye mask.

Once my cuticles met with everyone's satisfaction and my nails were polished - buffed, at my request, rather than painted - I was told to lie still another twenty minutes to let the facial mask do its work. I actually fell asleep, and they woke me after nearly an hour. "Have a nice nap?" Rosalie asked, smirking.

"Yeah, thanks. Sorry, I didn't sleep very soundly last night."

"It's fine," Alice said. "We're right on schedule."

My pond scum was washed off, and I was taken downstairs for a light lunch. "Where's everyone?" I asked. Only Rosalie and Alice were in the house. I tried to catch a glimpse of Edward through the back windows.

"Outside, finishing off the decorations. No, don't look," Alice said. "Let it be a surprise. And Esme's picking up your mother and stepfather at the airport."

I felt a little surge of excitement and nervousness. Mom and Phil were on their way, and that meant the wedding itself was drawing closer. "So the reception will be outside?"

"Yes. We thought it would be nice, since the weather is warm. Is that okay?"

"It's perfect."

Rosalie glanced toward the front door. "Your mother's here." A few seconds later, I heard the sound of a car pulling up the drive. I got up and went to the door, just as Esme entered. Mom darted around her and ran right to me.

"Hi, Mom!" I was pulled into a bear hug, the kind of soft, warm hug that was already starting to seem unfamiliar and foreign.

"Bella!" She took me by the shoulders and held me at arm's length. "Oh, look at you! You're just glowing!"

"Thanks," I mumbled. "Hi, Phil."

"Hello, Bella." Phil gave me a hug around the shoulders. "Congratulations."

"Bella's told me you've taken on practically the whole wedding, you and Alice," she said to Esme. "It's so nice of you..."

"Honey?" Phil said from behind her. "Could we take care of the luggage first, then talk?"

"Oh, yes," Esme said. "Let me show you your room. You can freshen up, then come down for lunch whenever you're ready."

"Be right back, sweetie," Mom said, and she and Phil followed Esme upstairs.

"It's nice of you guys to put them up," I said.

"No problem," Alice said. "We're giving them Edward's room."

I pictured Mom and Phil sleeping in the big, ornate bed Edward had bought for me, and that we'd...shared, and immediately blocked it out. Alice caught my expression. "We replaced the bed," she said with a smirk. "Esme thought they'd find it a little flowery for a young man's bedroom. Edward's room now has a cherrywood sleigh bed in standard size."

"Much better. You guys think of everything."

Mom, Phil and I finished lunch together, Mom doing a lot of the talking, but asking some very well directed questions. Eventually, she was taken outside to view the reception site, and I was brought upstairs once more, and placed in a chair while Alice and Rosalie fussed with my hair and conferred over hairdressing technicalities. At last, they got to work with the hairbrushes and pins.

"That's the look," Rosalie said, walking around to examine my head from all angles.

"Absolutely," Alice agreed. "Now, the makeup."

"Not too much, okay, Alice?" I said nervously.

She laughed. "Don't worry. I already promised Edward the same thing. He prefers you _au naturel_." Rosalie snickered, and I turned red. I closed my eyes and waited, more or less patiently, while they applied things to my face.

"There," Alice said at last. "What do you think?"

I turned to the mirror, and was momentarily startled. Alice, true to her promise, had not made any drastic changes in my appearance. I was still me, but not quite the me I was used to seeing. My eyelashes were a little thicker, my nose no longer shiny, and my lips glossy rather than faintly chapped. I just looked like a pretty, well rested version of myself.

Part of my hair was arranged in an intricately braided crown on top of my head, the remainder falling loose down my back. "I love it," I said decisively.

"Excellent." Alice looked me over with obvious pride.

"You look very pretty, Bella," Rosalie said.

I shrugged, and they both laughed.

"Sit tight while we get ourselves ready," Alice said. They both disappeared, returning in no more than two minutes, fully dressed.

"Is everyone else getting dressed?" I asked. I felt a little isolated from the action.

"Your mom's just finishing up. She's going to look in on you in a second, so let's get the dress in place." I stood submissively while Rosalie took my bathrobe and Alice handed me new undergarments - white lace, walking a fine line between racy and demure. Then Alice helped me into my blue dress, and Rosalie fastened the buttons up my back. "There." They stood back to admire their work. "Look, Bella!" Alice insisted, turning me toward her full-length mirror.

I had just enough time to note that I looked acceptable, when my mother opened the door a crack and peeked in. "Can I come in?"

"Sure, Mom. I'm all set."

"Oh, honey!" She stood back and looked me over. "You look so beautiful! Not like the usual bride at all, but _so_ beautiful." She turned to Esme, who'd come into the room after her. "Trust my Bella to go the unconventional route."

"She does look like a bride, though, I think," Esme said, smiling at me. "This would have been a very fitting dress to be married in, eighty or so years ago."

Mom laughed. "So she's actually just very, very old fashioned!"

"We should set out," Esme suggested. "The boys have already left."

"Oh! All right. Are we riding with you and Carlisle?" She turned back to me. "I'll see you at the church, sweetie." She gave me one more quick hug and hurried downstairs. Esme kissed me on the cheek and followed after her, and Rosalie gave me a quick wave and ran lightly down the stairs.

"Ready, Bella?" Alice asked. "The bride's supposed to arrive last, but not by too wide a margin."

"Sure. Are you driving?"

"No, Jasper's driving both of us. The bride and her attendant will ride in the back," she said grandly.

Jasper smiled and offered an arm to me and one to Alice in a courtly gesture, and we left the now empty house. He held the car door for us, then took the wheel, driving slowly enough to avoid passing the family members who had left earlier.

"Put your engagement ring on your right hand," Alice instructed me.

I did as I was told. "Thanks for all this, Alice," I said, my gesture taking in the dress, the hair, and my overall appearance.

She smiled happily. "My pleasure. Are you nervous?"

"A little bit," I admitted. "I'm glad there won't be too many people there."

She squeezed my hand encouragingly, just as the church came into view. Jasper parked close to the front entrance and quickly emerged to hold the door for us once again. I took a deep breath, and we walked in.

Rev. Hughes was waiting in the foyer, but I barely noticed him. Edward was standing there as well, resplendent in a suit and tie, his beautiful bronze hair combed but still unruly. He gave me a smile and my nervousness vanished. We stood there, grinning at each other, until the minister cleared his throat. "Everyone remember what they're supposed to be doing?" We both nodded. "Good, then. Come with me."

Jasper and Alice walked up the aisle and took their seats, Jasper on the right side of the aisle, Alice in the front pew on the left. Rev. Hughes led us up a little side aisle, from which we crossed the front of the church to take our places. Edward and I clasped hands briefly before he crossed the centre aisle and sat in the right front pew beside Carlisle, while I took my place on the left, next to Alice. We had assumed battle stations; it wouldn't be long now. I took another deep, calming breath.

Soft music filled the church, and I looked around to find its source. Rosalie was seated at an electric organ placed close to the pulpit, playing what I thought was Bach. She segued smoothly into a different piece of music, as Rev. Hughes took his place at the front of the church and nodded to Edward, then to me. We stood up and walked the few steps to the minister's lectern, coming together in front of him and joining hands. Carlisle stood to Edward's right, Alice to my left. Rev. Hughes opened his service book and began, using the traditional ceremony we'd agreed on: "Dearly beloved..."

My nervousness was gone; for the moment, I could only think about Edward. The vows, instead of being complicated lines I might mispronounce or get wrong, were words that practically spoke themselves, precisely what I wanted to say to Edward but never would have under any other circumstances. I found tears running down my face, merely because of how right this all was. Esme was right: deep inside, I was a traditionalist.

I answered "I will" to the question put to me, and Edward did the same. There were readings, which I must admit I paid little attention to. I was looking at Edward. Edward turned to face me. "In the name of God, I, Edward, take you, Isabella, to be my wife, to have and to hold..." He spoke solemnly and simply, and I listened, watching him, weeping for joy like the old fashioned girl I, apparently, was.

I repeated the vows as Rev. Hughes prompted me in an undertone. "...I, Isabella, take you, Edward, to be my husband..." I could hear my mother crying softly in the pew behind me.

We exchanged rings, and were pronounced husband and wife. Edward kissed me gently, and I threw my arms around his neck and held him tightly a moment, holding on to the sweetness of the moment. Everyone seemed to stand at once. Rosalie began playing again, music that was supposed to accompany us out of the church; but everyone left their seats and surged forward, embracing us one by one and trying to express their happiness. I felt surrounded, enveloped by love and support, and my tears began again.

When the congratulations began to subside enough to allow for an exit procession, Rev. Hughes left his place and led us back down the centre aisle. Alice held out her hand to Carlisle, and they followed. Edward and I came after them, hand in hand; then the family members, in twos and threes. We stopped in the foyer. "Well," Rev. Hughes said, "I must say, I've rarely seen a newly married couple so enthusiastically supported by their loved ones. Congratulations, and best of luck to you both." He shook hands with Edward, then with me.

"Thank you," Edward told him. "I hope you're able to join us at the reception."

"Unfortunately, I have to prepare for the next wedding. But thank you."

Carlisle shook his hand, thanked him again, and slipped him a sealed envelope. We left the building and headed for our respective cars.

"Straight to the party," Emmett warned as he folded himself through the car door. "No stops on the way." He winked at Edward.

"Rosalie!" I said, walking over to hug her. "Thank you so much for the music. It was just right."

"I'm glad you thought so." She hugged me back. "See you back home." She slipped gracefully into place beside Emmett.

"I suppose you want to do your own driving on the way back," Alice said to Edward, handing him a set of car keys. "Jazz and I can ride with Em and Rose." She handed me a couple of tissues, and I dried my remaining tears before taking my place beside Edward in the Aston Martin. We sat a moment and watched the cars pull out of the lot, returning the smiles and waves from the passengers.

I turned to Edward. "May I introduce myself? I'm your wife, Isabella Cullen."

He laughed, his perfect face almost glowing with joy, and pulled me into his arms.


	6. Setting Out

"Can I admit something to you, without your gloating over it?" I asked Edward as we danced - or rather, he danced and I let myself be whirled around in his arms - on the patio outside the Cullen house.

"That's a promising start to any conversation," he said, smiling. "I'll do my best. Tell me."

"Well...I'm very glad you insisted on a real wedding."

"Truly, love?"

"Yes. It was beautiful. I loved exchanging vows with you." He met my eyes with an expression that pulled at my heart, and I looked away to avoid losing my train of thought. "I loved having our families there, and making them all so happy. And I love being your wife for real. I think Esme may have been right."

"About what?"

"She said I'm more traditional than I realize."

He laughed. "I don't have to tell _you_ how happy I am you agreed to marry me."

"No," I said, smiling up at him. "You've made that very clear. But I was afraid you might think I was just going through the motions, for your sake. It might have been like that at first, a little, but now...it's just as important to me as it is to you. So thanks," I said, taking refuge from all this emotion in a joke, "for not ducking out and leaving me at the altar."

He didn't laugh, knowing me well enough by now to take my real meaning. "Thank you for telling me that. I keep thinking my happiness is so complete, nothing could add to it...until you give me even more." He held me closely and we stood in an embrace, letting our dance dissolve into mere swaying to the music.

The reception had gone smoothly so far. - as it could not fail to, with Alice at the helm. Because of the small number of people, we'd skipped the traditional receiving line. Alice, adopting the role of mistress of ceremonies - which nobody there would think to question - took up a position near the entrance, handed each new arrival a glass of champagne, or sparkling juice for the ostensibly underaged, and directed them to the patio. Food was served almost immediately, effectively launching the proceedings and giving us all something to do.

The food was delicious, and the human guests all made more than one trip to the buffet table. I kept an eye on the Cullens, when I thought of it, but could never catch them discarding their food, although their plates emptied just like those of the other guests.

After dinner, Edward and I cut the wedding cake and handed slices around to the guests. As I'd requested, there was no little bride and groom on top of the three tier cake; instead, there was a tiny sugar sculpture of a lion lying peacefully with a lamb in a bed of flowers. Fortunately, nobody demanded the customary ritual of bride and groom feeding each other the first bite; I didn't want Edward to have to deal with a stomach full of incompatible substances. I ate his piece of cake along with my own. And, to Edward's amusement, broke off and devoured a little piece of the sugar lion as well.

The inevitable toasts were made, beginning with a very sweet and serious one from the best man. Edward responded, then toasted my parents. Mom merrily raised a glass of champagne to "the lovely, lovely bride and groom, and their future happiness." Emmett made a speech that had everyone laughing and me turning red, and Alice briefly toasted "my best friend and brand new sister." Everyone took pity on me and didn't ask me to give a reply.

After dinner and speeches, Alice took charge of the sound system she'd set up near the back door, and the light background music gave way to dance tunes. I begged off the usual first dance, and Alice urged the guests to join "the happy couple" on the dance floor, to "take the pressure off Bella." Everyone laughed, knowing very well what she meant, and obligingly paired up and started moving to the music, the Cullens with skill and grace, the humans as best they could. Even Charlie joined in, leading Sue to an empty corner of the patio where they stepped cautiously around to the music. Charlie looked happy; I was grateful he had Sue in his life.

Charlie stepped up once more to dance with me, while Edward and Esme glided gracefully around us; then each of the Cullens, and finally Phil, danced with me as well. At that point, I decided to take a break, and Mom sat down beside me at one of the tables.

"They've put on a beautiful party," she remarked. "Just look at all this!" She gestured at the expanse of brick patio, the hanging flowers and twinkling lights, the tables covered with white cloths and floral centrepieces. "And the family did it all themselves, I understand."

"Pretty much," I said.

Mom studied me a moment. "You look so happy."

"I am!"

She nodded. "Alaska for a honeymoon. That's a little unusual."

"I know. It's partly so I can meet the Cullens' relatives."

"I hope you like the place. You were never all that outdoorsy."

I laughed. "We won't exactly be camping in the outback. Anchorage is a big city."

"That's true. You're driving the whole way?"

"Yeah. We're stopping for the night in Victoria, then taking a week or so to drive the rest of the way. We'll be staying in hotels on the way, and in Alaska, Edward's rented a little house. From there, we'll fly to New Hampshire and settle into our new place before school starts."

"That sounds more like a honeymoon. Speaking of which..." She looked at me significantly.

"What?"

"I never did have the traditional wedding night talk with you."

"Mom! That's really not necessary!"

"I know, I know, but...if you do have any questions, you know you can ask me anything."

"I'm fine." I could feel my face turning red.

"You've taken care of protection, right? I mean, you're just starting college. You don't want any unexpected..."

"Mom, I've got it covered! Honest!"

"Okay, sweetie. Just being a mom. You know, while I still have the chance." She started getting misty.

"I know. Thanks, Mom. I appreciate it. But I'm okay, honest." I gave her a hug.

"I believe you. Okay, embarrassing moment over. I'm going to go have a martini." She kissed me and headed for the bar.

I looked across the patio and saw Edward watching me, grinning. "Just you wait," I said quietly, knowing he'd be able to hear. "Two more drinks, and she'll be giving _you_ the wedding night talk." I saw him stifle a laugh.

Mom actually did get a little tipsy over the course of the evening, and Esme, ever the perfect hostess, matched her drink for drink and pretended to get tipsy along with her. Carlisle and Charlie spent a long time exchanging stories of Edward's and my childhoods, Charlie's stories real, Carlisle's made up but perfectly convincing. The rest of the Cullens kept the dancing going throughout. I alternately danced and circulated, talking comfortably with everyone, but always drifting back to Edward.

The sun hadn't quite set when Alice approached me. "I think it's time, Bella."

"Time for what?"

"To change clothes and get ready to go. You do remember you're leaving on your honeymoon this evening, don't you?"

"Yes! Wow, the time just flew by!"

She grinned. "I guess that's a good sign." She took my hand and led me upstairs, where she unpinned my hair and helped me change out of my blue dress and into an outfit she'd chosen for travelling, silk pants and a knit top that was stylish but comfortable. "Your bag's in the trunk already," she told me, "along with Edward's. Don't worry, I haven't forgotten anything."

"I'll take your word for it. Thank you, Alice. You've been the most wonderful bridesmaid anyone ever had."

Her smile widened. "Ready to say your goodbyes?" I suddenly froze where I was. Something had just occurred to me. "What's wrong?"

"Alice...could I maybe talk to Jasper for a second?"

"Jasper? Sure." She frowned, puzzled. "Jazz? Could you come up here, please?" She opened the bedroom door just as Jasper came trotting up the stairs at human speed.

"Bella?" He looked at me quizzically.

"I want to ask a favour," I told him.

"Certainly. What can I do for you?"

"Edward and I are leaving now, and I have to say goodbye to my parents. They don't know it, but it's pretty definitely the last time I'll ever see them." He nodded gravely. "I don't want to act like I'm saying goodbye forever. It'll just worry them, make them think I'm anxious about being married, or something. I want to be able to say goodbye more casually, you know, but...I'm not sure if I can pull it off."

"You probably can't," Alice agreed. "You're not a very convincing liar."

"I understand what you're asking, Bella," Jasper said. "I'd be happy to help." Instantly, my angst over my final goodbye to my parents dissipated. I felt as calm as if I were leaving them for an hour to go to the library.

"Thanks, Jasper."

He smiled. "Happy to help. You'll be fine."

"All set?" Alice asked. I nodded confidently, and we headed downstairs.

I hugged everyone, thanking each of them for their part in the celebration. I gave Phil the usual shoulder hug. "Thanks for being here, Phil. I hope you had a good time."

"I did. Although maybe not as good a time as Renee." He glanced over to where Mom was laughing uproariously over something Emmett had said. "It's a good thing she's not driving."

I could see Edward off in a corner, talking earnestly to Carlisle, apparently thanking him. They hugged warmly, and Edward rested his head against Carlisle's shoulder a moment, looking very much like the affectionate father and teenaged son they pretended to be.

I crossed the room to where Mom was standing. "Well, we're off."

"Oh, honey!" She hugged me hard. "I hope you and Edward will be happy, happy, happy!"

"I know we will, Mom. Thank you for everything." I hugged her hard. "I love you."

"I love you too, baby!" She turned to Edward, who had appeared at my shoulder. "Drive carefully, now!"

"Absolutely," he promised. "Goodbye, Renee." She kissed him on the cheek, and I moved on to Sue and Charlie, who were near the door.

"Sue, thank you _very_ much for coming." There was extra significance in my words. It was a particular effort for Sue to socialize with the Cullens, I knew.

"You're welcome," she said evenly, giving me a hug. "Good luck, Bella."

"Good luck to both of you, too," I said. Charlie looked a little flustered at that, but Sue just smiled and nodded calmly. "Bye, Dad."

Charlie returned my hug. Two hugs in one day. We'd expressed more affection to each other today than we had for, probably, the last five years. "Bye, Bells. You have a safe trip. Call when you get to New Hampshire."

"I will," I said, aware that it might be an empty promise. I tightened my hug a moment. "I love you, Dad. Thanks for everything."

"Love you too, Bells." He squeezed back once more before releasing me. Still calm and untroubled, I smiled at him and turned to the door, taking Edward's hand, and we headed around the house to the front drive.

Everyone followed us , showering us with rice and calling out goodbyes as we climbed into the rental car waiting for us out front. Edward started the engine and we pulled slowly down the drive. "Goodbye, goodbye!" I kept calling back, waving from the car window until we turned a corner and out of sight.

Edward chuckled. "I removed eight shoes and a Just Married sign from the car before we set out."

"It would be a shame to overlook that tradition." I paused, swallowing hard, as the effects of Jasper's gift ceased abruptly. I looked back at the house a moment.

"Is everything all right, love?"

"Yes," I said firmly. "Everything's just right." I looked over at him, and it was. He headed toward the highway. "I don't suppose you need a map, or a co-pilot."

He smiled. "No, I have the route memorized, thank you. We'll reach Victoria in about three hours. Are you comfortable?"

"Yes. Extremely." The car was roomy, with seats that felt like an easy chair.

"I chose this model for that very reason," he explained. "It's a fairly long drive to Anchorage."

"Thank you." The car was a BMW of some kind, but that's all I'd absorbed about it. "Is this the same kind as my wedding present?" I knew how he liked me to try and guess, even though one car was more or less like another to me.

"Not even close," he said, grinning. He took the on ramp and headed north-east, toward Port Angeles. "Would you like some music?"

"Sure." He touched some controls, and Frank Sinatra's voice came through the loudspeakers.

"_You Make Me Feel So Young_," he noted. "How apropos."

"Is it? I feel very adult right now," I told him, "what with the wedding ring and all."

He laughed. "So do I; but I also feel seventeen again." He began singing along with the radio, in a caricature of Sinatra's voice that had me laughing helplessly.

We talked as we drove, comparing notes on the wedding. Edward left the highway and drove through the centre of Port Angeles. I looked down the main street, remembering the night he'd saved me from those men. The night he'd let me know the truth about himself. I looked up to find him watching me. "I was just remembering our...first date," I said.

"So was I." He took my hand. "It seems like centuries have passed since then."

It was just starting to get dark as he drove to the harbour and eased the car over the ramp onto the ferry. "I've never been on one of these," I said, peering curiously around. "Do we have to stay inside the car?"

"No, once they've done a security check, we can get out and look around. There's a cafeteria, bathrooms, even a gift shop."

Border security checked our ID and looked through the car briefly, and asked a series of questions about where we'd come from and our intended destination.

"We're driving to Anchorage, Alaska," Edward told him.

"On vacation?" the guard asked idly, checking the back seat.

"We're on our honeymoon," Edward replied. I hid a smile; his enjoyment at sharing that information was almost palpable.

"Oh, yeah? Congratulations." The man gave us a quick smile before moving on to the next vehicle.

"You just love telling people we're married, don't you?"

"I do. I'd like to tell the world." He pulled me close and kissed me. I lost interest in the scene around me for a while.

When I finally came up for air, the ferry was already in motion. I looked back; the mainland was far behind us, Port Angeles barely visible.

"We've been travelling almost half an hour," he told me.

"You really know how to make the waiting time go by faster."

"Glad to be of use," he said airily, and I laughed. "Would you like to get out of the car for a while?"

"I suppose it would be a good idea," I said, less than enthusiastically. He smirked, and we climbed out onto the deck of the ferry. I made use of the ladies' room and got a paper cup of lemonade from the cafeteria, then wandered cautiously along the side rails, looking down into the churning water. "I heard a lady say you can sometimes see dolphins."

"That's a bit less likely with me around, I'm afraid," Edward said.

"Really?"

"Animals avoid us. They sense we're dangerous."

We found a seat inside the glassed-in area so I could get out of the wind, and talked together quietly. Edward teased me about my spa day with Alice and Rosalie, and about my mother's offer of last minute instruction on the birds and the bees. We made plans, detailed ones for the next few months, and more general plans for the coming years. It seemed like minutes had passed before I heard the PA system announce that we would reach Victoria shortly, and asking passengers to return to their vehicles.

We drove off the ferry and directly into the line for Canadian Customs. We handed over our passports and answered one or two more questions. "Just going on holiday?" the uniformed officer asked Edward.

"We're on our honeymoon." He turned to give me a grin.

"I see. Congratulations to you both." He returned our documents with a smile. "Enjoy your trip."

"Thank you," Edward said, and I smiled out the window at the man.

"Everybody's so friendly when they find out we were just married."

"The whole world loves newlyweds," he agreed.

By this time it was past eleven. "Not much farther," Edward told me. "Our hotel's close to the harbour." He drove through the darkened streets, soft music playing on the car stereo. We were quiet now, peacefully holding hands, and I watched the scenery pass with a sense of well being.

Edward finally turned down a long, winding drive in the direction of the ocean, stopping the car in front of a large building with a beautiful facade of cedar beams and glass. "Is this our hotel?" I asked.

"It is." He popped the trunk open and climbed out, quickly running around the car to open my door for me.

"It doesn't look like a hotel, does it?"

He grinned. "I suppose that's the effect they were going for. What _does_ it look like?"

"The headquarters of the Olympic Games in Oslo."

He laughed at that. "I think you'll like the place. I booked a suite with an ocean view."

All I cared about was whether it had a view of Edward, but I smiled. "It sounds perfect."

A uniformed bellhop came through the door with a luggage cart. "All four, sir?" he asked Edward, who nodded. The man placed our luggage on the cart with the greatest of care and wheeled it into the lobby. Edward took my hand, and we followed him in and went to the front desk, where we were greeted by a smiling concierge.

"Cullen," Edward said.

"Good evening, Mr. Cullen," she replied. "You're in room 302. The dining room is open for another hour, and room service is available until two a.m." She handed him two key cards.

"Thank you." Edward gave one of the cards to me, and we followed our bellhop to the elevators, up two floors, and down a corridor to our room. It was gorgeous yet comfortable looking, in a tasteful contemporary style with big leather chairs and a leather sofa in the sitting room overlooking the promised ocean view. The bedroom was huge, with a king sized platform bed and a vaguely Asian-influenced black and gold rug. Through the door, I could see an immense bathroom with an oversized whirlpool tub in one corner.

"Does it meet with your approval?" Edward asked me, apparently in all seriousness. I nodded, and he slipped the bellhop a folded bill. "Thank you." The man wished us a good night and vanished. Edward switched on the 'do not disturb' sign in the door and turned to face me.

"Alone at last," I said lightly, suddenly a little nervous.

He seemed to be aware of it. "Sit down and relax for a little while," he suggested. "It's been a long day for you."

"It doesn't feel that long," I said, although I dropped onto the sofa. Edward sat down beside me and put an arm around my shoulders, and I rested my head against him happily. "I've had people looking after my comfort every second of the day."

"That's just as it should be." I chuckled, and we sat together a few minutes, watching the ocean and the dark silhouettes of evergreen trees through the ceiling-high windows.

"Oh!" I sat up suddenly, remembering. "Where's my purse?"

He picked it up from a side table and handed it to me. "What is it?"

"I want to give you your wedding present."

"Bella! There was no need to..."

"Shh. It barely even counts as any kind of present." I took an envelope out of my purse and handed it to him. "Just a hint: it's not a new car."

He grinned and carefully opened the envelope, taking out the little scrap of fabric inside.

"It's a bookmark," I said.

"So I see. A very old one, I think." The rectangle of fabric had been decorated with needlepoint violets and a scrollwork initial E, in embroidery thread that was now faded to faint pastels. "It's beautiful. Thank you."

I shrugged. "I saw it at this yard sale last weekend. It was marked $1.00, and I only had 88 cents, as you know. So I bargained the guy down."

"Spending your last remaining penny," he mused, looking at me.

"That's right. Anything I own now is joint marital property."

He laughed. "I like that."

"I thought you would."

He kissed me gently. "Would you like a bath? I see there's a Jacuzzi in the room. You might find it relaxing."

"That would be nice." I was getting over my nervousness, and ready to see where the night would take us.

He disappeared, darting at unnatural speed to the bedroom. I heard water running, and got up to follow him, kicking off my shoes as I went.

Edward met me by the bedroom door. "May I help?" he asked, his hands on the buttons of my blouse. I nodded, and he undid the buttons, taking his time, and slipped it from my shoulders, then helped me out of my slacks.

I undid his top button. "Maybe you should take something off, too," I suggested shyly. "Just to be fair." He smiled and let me unbutton him, then tossed the shirt over a chair.

He left the room for half a second to turn off the water, and returned. "Shall I join you?" he asked. "The tub is large enough for both of us."

"Yes," I said, feeling myself turning red. "That would be very nice."

Edward deftly helped me out of my undergarments, his hands lingering, brushing soft little kisses along my neck. There was something subtly different about his manner with me. Different in a good way; he was bolder, more openly seductive. I finally realized the obvious: we were married now. He no longer felt as if he were compromising his principles, even slightly, or showing me any disrespect. I was his wife now, and all things were permitted.

I looked up into his face. "Does it seem different to you now?" I asked him. "Now that we're married? You seem more...at ease."

"I suppose I am."

"It's a little weird, but I am, too." It was true. I really was a traditionalist at heart.

We finished undressing, then he scooped me up and placed me tenderly in the tub, hopping gracefully in after me. We lay quietly together a few minutes, holding hands and letting the hot water swirl around us; then Edward moved closer and kissed me. In the semi-darkness, electricity seemed to spring up between us like a natural force, and I was soon panting and clutching him in abject desire. He made no attempt to hide that he felt the same way. He pulled me against his body and gave me one more long, sweet kiss, then rose from the bath, stepping out and drying himself off almost faster than I could see. In one motion, he picked me up and wrapped me in an oversized bath towel, and carried me to the bed.

His skin was warm from the bathwater, and feeling his naked body against mine didn't make me break out in goosebumps. I squirmed against him as he kissed and stroked every inch of me. But I remembered that there was something I wanted to ask him, and this was definitely the time.

"Edward," I said, trying to slow my breathing for a moment.

"My love?" He kept kissing along my shoulder, his body faintly luminous in the near darkness.

"I wanted to ask..." He stopped and looked at me. "This is our wedding night, and I just wanted to say...to suggest..." I lost my nerve for the moment.

"Bella, you're my wife now," he said softly. "Don't be uneasy. There's nothing you can't say to me."

"I know. Well...I wanted to say that we could, you know, consummate the marriage for real. If you want." He looked thoughtful. "You know what I, um..."

"I understand, love. But it would still be as dangerous for you as it was before."

"Maybe. We've been...practising, so to speak, for a while now." He grinned at me, and I relaxed a little. "And _that's_ been safe. Wouldn't it be all right?"

He touched my face. "I won't lie; it's a very tempting idea. But honestly, I don't feel at all sure it would be safe. I hate to refuse, but I would hate much more to injure you accidentally. Can we wait, sweetheart, until I can be certain?"

I nodded. "Sure," I said, smiling at him. "I just thought I should offer."

"I'm not refusing your offer," he said, taking me in his arms again. "Not by any means. I'm just taking a raincheck. We'll have this conversation again." He kissed me. "And in the very near future."

I wove my fingers through his hair and pulled him closer.

I fell asleep in Edward's arms, pleasantly exhausted, almost two hours later. I slept well, but had odd dreams. I saw myself rising from the bed and walking out the bedroom door and straight into a deep forest. It was faintly lit this time, the sun just coming over the horizon. I was standing on the same rough footpath through the woods. I looked down at myself; I was no longer skeletally thin, as I had been in the previous dream. There was that same alternate path, curving away from the one I stood on. I was alone.

I looked behind me. The roads and houses of LaPush were visible in the early morning light, and I could see the same wolf, the one with the reddish fur, walking away from me and disappearing around the corner of a building. He was still keeping watch over the town, and he was still all alone. I turned back, and once again found the beautiful little boy was standing there on the winding path.

"Hello," I said to him. "Did you come here to tell me something?" He nodded. Direct communication: that was encouraging. "What is it?"

He raised a hand and waved goodbye, then turned and started to walk away.

"That's all?" I called after him. "You just came to say goodbye?" He turned back and nodded again.

I wanted to argue with him, to get clearer answers; but something in my mind told me not to. _If I find out more, it will hurt_, I thought, not knowing where the idea came from. _It will hurt more than saying goodbye to your mom and Charlie for the last time_. So I didn't ask. I raised my hand in return. "Goodbye, then."

The little boy smiled at me - a beautiful smile, one I almost, but not quite, recognized. He waved goodbye one last time, then turned and walked away along the winding path until he disappeared into the forest.


	7. Honeymoon

In the morning, Edward called room service and ordered a light breakfast for two - which equated to a lavish breakfast for one - and fed it to me in bed. There are worse things than lying naked on 800 thread count sheets and being fed French toast and fresh strawberries by a beautiful, equally naked man who finds the sight of you eating deeply arousing. I finished a cup of peppermint tea with wildflower honey, and we reprised the previous night, then washed each other in the multiple-spray walk-in shower. Life was good.

I remembered reading in some magazine about certain men who had trouble reconciling sex and romance with marriage. They would be enchanted with their girlfriends, only to become disinterested once they'd tied the knot. As I gradually learned, Edward was almost the exact opposite. Maybe he was still carrying around an idealized view of marriage from his youth; or maybe that's just how he saw things. Either way, to him marriage was a Promised Land where desire and guilt finally parted ways, leaving only love and delight. I adored married Edward.

Edward was dressed in seconds, and waited patiently as I selected clothing from the suitcase Alice had packed. I was relieved to see she'd taken into account that we were going on a road trip to Alaska, as opposed to a series of Tony Award after-parties, and had chosen items even I couldn't take exception to. Edward watched approvingly as I put on the lacy new underthings Alice had packed, then slipped on a short sleeved cotton knit dress with a pretty beaded belt, and a pair of leather sandals. The dress may have been a designer original that cost thousands, for all I knew, but it was comfortable and functional. I brushed my hair and tied it back in a ponytail.

"You look lovely," Edward said.

He picked up the phone, informed the front desk that we would be checking out in ten minutes, and led me out the door. "They'll take care of the luggage," he informed me.

Sure enough, when we walked out the front exit, our rental car was parked there, the suitcases neatly packed in the trunk. The valet smiled and returned the car keys, and Edward thanked him and handed him a tip. I'd probably never get used to being waited on hand and foot, but hanging around with the Cullens had taught me to adopt a nonchalant manner in these circumstances. I was still a little amused by the way the hotel indulged its guests.

We returned to the highway, continuing north. "Now that we're getting away from the larger cities," Edward said, "we'll probably have to stay in simpler lodgings."

"Like a tent?"

He grinned. "No. Like a mid-range hotel. Possibly a guest cabin."

"Simpler is fine," I said. "I'm pretty low maintenance. Apart from having to be saved from deadly peril every few weeks."

He laughed. "You really are a danger magnet, it's true. It's my pleasure and privilege to protect you from your own extraordinary bad luck, but enough is enough. Let's hope we've put all that behind us."

A short distance up the highway, we drove onto another ferry, this one over a narrow strait, but still taking over an hour to cross. "I just realized," I said, "this is the first time I've been in a foreign country."

"The first of many, I hope," Edward said. "You once told me you looked forward to travelling with me after we were married."

"I do," I said, "but then, even doing ordinary things with you is special." I turned red, but I had no real trouble getting the words out. I was a changed woman.

"It's the same for me, love."

I started to yawn around the time we reached Chilliwack. "You didn't sleep well last night," Edward observed.

"I slept extremely well. I just didn't sleep very _long._"

He shot me a very suggestive look. "I take full responsibility for that."

"Well, I may share the blame somewhat," I allowed, and he laughed.

"Would you like to try and sleep a little? The seat tilts back."

"If you don't mind, maybe I will."

"Please." He smirked again. "You may have your rest disrupted yet again tonight."

"The things we married women have to put up with!" I murmured, reclining the seat.

He chuckled and turned the radio to a station that played ambient music, and I conked out almost immediately.

The sensation of the car coming to a stop woke me. I looked around and saw that Edward had pulled in at a rest stop and gas station. "Sorry to wake you, love. The gas tank was nearly empty."

"It's okay." I adjusted the seat and sat up. "I feel much better. Where are we?"

"Hope."

"Excuse me?"

"A little town along the Fraser River, called Hope." He gestured to the building beyond the gas tanks. "Do you need to stop?"

"Yes, actually." I got out of the car, stretched, and crossed the parking lot. "Be right back." I used the ladies' room and bought a drink, a little packet of pretzels, and a couple of post cards, using my Cullen Treasury money for the first time. I studied the half English, half French label on the pretzel package with interest.

Edward had finished filling up when I came back. "Can you take my picture?"

He raised an eyebrow. "At the gas station?"

"How about over there?" I pointed across the street, to the scenic, tree-lined river. "I want some snapshots of our trip to email to Mom."

"All right." We crossed the highway and he took two pictures of my standing on the river bank, then I took one of him, and we ran back to the car.

"Pretzels? Don't you want more than that for lunch?" Edward asked as I slid back into the passenger seat. "There's a café right next door."

"No, thanks. I had that big breakfast. I think I'll just hold out until dinner."

"As you prefer. But please let me know if you get hungry along the way."

"I will."

"If we can make 100 Mile House by tonight, there's a fairly good hotel there, and some places where we could get dinner."

"How far is that?"

"About another three hours."

"No problem."

We continued north. I finished my pretzels and dug through my purse to find my lip balm. "Do you always carry a book with you?" Edward asked, noticing the worn copy of _The Great Gatsby _in my handbag.

"Always. Since I was about ten years old." I shrugged. "I guess you could call it a habit."

"Did you bring a book with you to our wedding?" he teased.

"That was one of the few times I didn't. I was taking a big chance," I said thoughtfully. "What if I'd lost interest in the proceedings, and wanted something to read?"

He laughed long and hard. "I am very much obliged to you," he said formally, "for giving the event your undivided attention."

"Don't mention it."

We discussed _The Great Gatsby_, and F. Scott Fitzgerald, leading the conversation toward their years in Paris. Edward told me about the times he'd visited Paris, and we talked about going there together some time. I, in turn, made him laugh with stories about my own limited travels, including a day trip with Mom to Tombstone to see the OK Corral. When a song one of us liked came on the radio, we turned it up and sang along, then resumed our conversation. Three hours passed quickly, and before I knew it, Edward was pulling into the parking lot of a large hotel, one from a hotel chain I recognized as medium-high end.

He looked at me a little apologetically. "Is this all right?"

"Of course," I said, surprised. "Why not?"

"It's a bit more basic than last night's accommodations."

"Edward, for goodness' sake! When Mom and I went on vacation, we'd stay in the cheapest budget hotels we could find. The place we stayed at last night was great, but I'm not going to fall apart if I'm not constantly in the lap of luxury."

"I realize that, of course," he said. "I suppose I enjoy providing you with the best of everything, now that I finally have the opportunity."

I rolled my eyes, and he chuckled and hopped out of the car to claim our room key. We carried our own luggage up to the second floor, and found the room simply decorated but large and comfortable. Edward set the suitcases on the luggage stand. "Are you hungry?"

"Starving. Just give me five minutes." I went into the bathroom for a human minute and to wash up a little and tidy my hair, then stepped back out and retrieved my purse. "Let's go."

We returned to the lobby and Edward approached the desk. "Can you recommend a place for dinner?" he asked the clerk. He suggested a diner closer to the centre of town.

"Just follow the highway 'til you pass the propane place," the desk clerk explained. "It's on your left. Doesn't look like much, but the food's really good."

We took his advice. The food was scrumptious, and I ate my own dinner and snuck about a third of Edward's. We had a great time watching the people in the diner, speculating about who they were and where they'd come from, and laughing over the inexplicable decor of the restaurant, which featured large, colourful murals of Greyhound buses, wheelbarrows, and other unromantic subjects. Before we left, Edward asked our waitress to take a picture of both of us in front of the wheelbarrow painting.

Back at the hotel, I borrowed Edward's laptop, and sent Mom a short email describing our trip so far. I attached the photos and hit send. I sent an even shorter message to Charlie, who'd promised to start using email in spite of his technophobe nature, and embedded the snapshots into the message since he'd probably never figure out how to access them otherwise.

After a moment's consideration, I send a third email, to my friend Rachel Black. I asked how she was doing, described the wedding, briefly, and the honeymoon road trip, added some pictures, then wrote, _I'm sorry you, your dad and Jacob couldn't be at the wedding, but of course I understand. I hope we're still friends. How are Billy and Jacob doing?_ I tacked on thanks for her last book recommendation, added one of my own, and sent the message.

I got up and stretched, and Edward looked up from the book he'd picked up. "All done?"

"Yep. I thought I'd take a shower before bed." I walked toward the bathroom, removing clothing as I went. I looked back at Edward, who had put down his book and was watching me intently. "Coming?"

We had another wonderful night together, beginning in the shower and ending in the bed. I slept like a log, woke up at six and sleepily molested Edward with his full and freely given consent, went back to sleep and didn't wake up again until nine. "G'morning," I mumbled, snuggling closer against him.

"Good morning, love. Did you sleep well?"

"I did." I sat up. "I'm sorry you have to wait around for hours every night, while I'm unconscious."

He smiled. "I don't mind in the least. Watching over you while you sleep has always been something I felt privileged to do. Besides," he held up his book, "I can keep myself occupied."

I looked at the book's cover. "_A Tree Grows in Brooklyn_?" I asked dubiously.

"Someone left it in a dresser drawer."

I nodded. "Sure. I once read a John Grisham novel just because I found a copy in a laundromat."

"How was it?"

"So-so." I climbed out of bed and padded barefoot to the bathroom, returning a minute or two later and repacking my toothbrush. "Do you never have to brush your teeth at all?" I asked out of idle curiosity.

"The venom makes it completely unnecessary. My teeth couldn't possibly be any cleaner than they are."

"I see." I started looking through my suitcase, tossing a blue satin bra and matching boy shorts onto the bed. Edward helped me put those on, and I found a pair of what looked like simple beige cotton pants, but which had an unfamiliar Italian label, and a dark blue knit top whose label was blank except for the hand written notation '_Pour Mlle Céline_.' After pulling on socks and a pair of walking shoes, I stood up, ready to go.

"The hotel offers breakfast in the lobby," Edward said, "but probably nothing spectacular." Sure enough, the offerings were limited. I had a glass of orange juice and a little plastic bowl of cornflakes. I dumped my styrofoam breakfast dishes, and we checked out, packed our suitcases in the trunk, and drove on.

"We'll stop for a decent lunch, whenever you feel ready," Edward promised.

We continued our conversation about books as we drove along the highway. We covered favourite characters from literature; favourite heros and villains; disputed most overrated novel; compared notes on funniest, scariest, and most touching novel; disagreed about Wuthering Heights and were of one mind on everything by Eudora Welty; and argued the merits of science fiction, fantasy fiction, murder mysteries, and ghost stories. From there, the discussion wandered freely.

In the early afternoon, we came to another town, a slightly larger one, where we refilled the gas tank and had lunch at a place Edward had looked up in some tour guide. I had a salad and Edward a grilled chicken sandwich - which meant, or course, that I ate both. "It really is beautiful up here," I said, gazing out the window of the restaurant.

"Not too green?" he joked, recalling my objections to Forks.

"It seems a little different here. Or maybe this kind of landscape is growing on me."

He nodded, seeming to hesitate before speaking again. "Are you finding the trip a little dull?"

"Dull? No, not at all," I said in surprise. "Are you?"

"Quite the opposite. But this is your honeymoon as well. I want you to enjoy it."

"I'm great." I wasn't sure where this was coming from.

"You know, you can suggest changes in our itinerary. There's been a great deal of steady driving, maybe too much. We could stop whenever you like. Of course, there aren't many diversions in much of the area we're heading through, especially if you don't care for hunting or fishing."

"No. I like it, actually. I'm glad we decided to drive." I found the slow pace and lack of distraction soothing. Edward and I had practically unlimited private time to talk, and I was learning details about his life, his experiences, his point of view, that I hadn't been aware of before. He asked me questions about my life as well, reminding me a little of when we first knew each other, and he had peppered me with endless questions about my likes and dislikes, my life, my family, my thoughts and feelings. I explained all this to him. "It's a chance to get to know each other better. Back home, there always seemed to be distractions. I'm loving every minute."

He nodded, satisfied. "That's precisely the way I feel. But I was afraid it might be too monotonous for you, or simply too physically tiring to sit still for so long."

"Actually, I _would_ appreciate a short break to get out of the car and stretch my legs, maybe every hour or so."

"Of course, love. You should have said something earlier."

"I was enjoying our talk too much. But I wouldn't mind pulling over from time to time. Other than that, everything is great. This is the perfect honeymoon." I felt momentary sympathy for all the newlyweds who'd opted for a Caribbean resort.

We talked and laughed and sang and flirted our way up the highway, stopping occasionally, as requested, for short breaks at roadside picnic grounds, beside little lakes or streams, or whenever we spotted an odd or interesting or funny tourist attraction. I took pictures of anything I thought would interest or amuse my parents. We made one longer stop in a small town whose public library was having a used book sale. I could never turn those down.

In the early evening, we reached a town called Smithers. "Like the guy in _The Simpsons_," I noted.

"I doubt there's a connection," Edward said drily.

Smithers was a little larger than Forks but less dreary, more picturesque. "My mom would like this place," I said.

"Would she?"

"Well, for a couple of hours. It's like some stage set of a hinterland small town."

Edward had identified the best lodgings in town, and brought us there directly. We checked into one of the hotel's two suites, with a mountain view and, to my satisfaction, a large whirlpool bath. We gathered bathing suits and took a quick, chilly dip in a crystal-clear lake at a public beach just off the highway, hurried back to the hotel to change, then set out in search of dinner. And then back to the hotel and a hot bath for two.

The following day was sunny, and promised to remain so. "Bad weather," Edward said, looking out the window of our hotel room. "At least for practical purposes." After checking out, he had me go out and bring the car around to the front entrance, which was protected by a sort of drive-through canopy which shielded him from the sun. He looked a little upset as I moved to the passenger side and let him take the wheel.

"Did I do something wrong?" I asked.

"No, of course not. Why?"

"You looked annoyed when I picked you up."

"Not with you, love! No, it just goes against the grain a little, to have you run errands for me. To send you to fetch the car."

I laughed. "Edward, please don't worry about it."

He sighed. "It will be the same throughout the day. I won't be able to leave the car if, for example, we need gas."

"I can manage," I said drily.

He grinned at last. "You've married a very old-fashioned man, I'm afraid."

"Well, it's too late to do anything about that now."

I did, in fact, get out and fill the gas tank, making Edward laugh by pretending to struggle with an unwieldy fuel hose and barely make the long trek from the car to the station attendant and back. He laughed even harder when I tripped for real and had to catch myself on a display of engine oil.

Since Edward couldn't leave the car to accompany me into a restaurant, I proposed another picnic. I bought food to go and we drove into a state park until we'd found the shadiest, most secluded picnic area we could imagine. There we talked as I ate, about everything and nothing; and then took a long walk through the dense, wildflower-strewn forest.

It was still sunny by the time we stopped for the night. Edward avoided the sun by having me drop him off at the hotel's front door and park the car, then join him. We limited our outings to a swim in the hotel's indoor pool, and bypassed the restaurant question by ordering room service, finding ourselves very comfortably settled in for the night.

The rest of our road trip followed much the same routine. There were no exciting recreational activities of the kind honeymooning couples supposedly sought out; no scuba diving, no nightclubs, not even a ride in a hot air balloon. Just beautiful scenery, unhurried travel, undisturbed privacy, unlimited time to talk together and grow closer. The days passed unmarked, as we had no deadlines to meet. I'd always been happy whenever I was with Edward, but, what with one thing and another, had rarely been completely at peace with him, as I was now.


	8. Extended Family

We stopped for the night in a town with the agreeable name of Port Edward. From there, we prepared to cross the border into Alaska, a step of the journey requiring yet another ferry, and yet another border crossing. It was another four days - another happy, peaceful four days - before we reached the home of Tanya's family, who lived outside a small town about twenty miles north of Anchorage. "Their home is very secluded," Edward explained. "Even more than my family's is._ Our_ family's, I should say. They don't interact with the local population quite as much, either, or not in the same way. None of them hold jobs or attend school."

"What do people think they do for a living?"

"Their cover story is that they're a group of artists and writers with an independent income, sharing a residence."

"Like something out of 1920's Paris."

He smiled. "Exactly like that. Eleazar and Carmen are understood to be a married couple. The presence of the other three resident females is a subject of local gossip. The family allows details of their relationship to remain vague."

We had to leave the highway to reach the house, following a dirt road for several miles through the seemingly endless forest before we came to a long gravel drive leading to a clearing in which stood the residence of the Denali coven. It was impressive, even from a distance.

As Edward parked the car beside the house, the front door opened and Alice ran out to us. "_There_ you are!"

"Hi, Alice!" She hugged me, lifting me slightly off the ground, then she flung her arms around Edward's waist. "When did you get here?"

"We all flew in two days ago. Come on inside! Everybody's waiting to meet you."

I took a deep breath and followed her to the door, holding Edward's hand.

The Denali's home was as big as the Cullen house, but imposing in a different way. It was both grand and rustic, with a cedar log exterior, and big wooden beams extending upward into a cathedral ceiling over the open concept ground level, the floor of which was a combination of wide hardwood planks and flagstone. There was a huge stone hearth built into one wood panelled wall, ceiling-high bookshelves covering the opposite wall. It belonged on an episode of Backwoods Hunting Lodges of the Rich and Famous. I only had a moment to take in the interior before I was surrounded by welcoming Cullens, greeted and hugged.

"It's wonderful to see you both again," Esme said, kissing first me, then Edward.

Emmett mussed my hair by way of greeting. "How are you liking married life, brother?" Emmett asked, punching Edward jovially on the arm.

"Even more than I thought I would," he answered. A reassuring reply.

A group of five other vampires stood a little to one side, watching. They seemed to be looking at me with curiosity. In terms of appearance, they fell into two clear categories: two who were black haired with creamy skin, prominent cheekbones and pronounced features, and three more, pale blondes with delicate faces. All had the same eye colour: palest amber. They'd fed recently, probably in anticipation of my presence in the house.

"Let me introduce our Bella," Carlisle said, laying an affectionate hand on my head. "Bella, I'd like you to meet our friends - our 'cousins.' This is Tanya." He gestured to a strawberry blonde who somehow gave the impression of being in charge. She was pretty, as I knew she would be; but I didn't expect her to have such a wholesome quality. I had pictured a femme fatale, but Tanya looked more like a vampire version of the farmer's daughter.

"Bella! It's so good to meet you at last!" She came forward, smiling broadly and with apparent sincerity. "Congratulations!" She took my hand and kissed my cheek. "Congratulations to you, too, Edward." She kissed him as well. "What good news, your getting married at last. And so _very_ unexpected!" The other blonde females laughed at that.

"Say hello to the others," Tanya went on. "This is my sister Katrina. Everyone calls her Kate." A slender female with long, stick-straight hair of palest blonde came forward, took my hand and kissed my cheek as Tanya had. "And my sister Irina." A lovely female with chin length, ash blonde hair and big, soulful eyes greeted me in the same way.

"This is Carmen, and Eleazar," Tanya concluded.

The dark haired couple approached me together. "Congratulations, Bella," Carmen said, carefully embracing me, then taking my face gently between her hands and studying me a moment. "I'm so happy for both of you!" She gave Edward a warm hug.

Eleazar took my hand and bowed. "We wish you joy," he said formally, then turned to shake Edward's hand and clap him on the shoulder with a smile.

"Thank you," I said. "It's so good to finally meet all of you. I've heard such nice things about you." I thought I sounded stilted, but I was a little self conscious. Being the only person at a party wearing jeans is nothing compared to being the only one with a pulse.

"And we've heard nice things about _you_!" Tanya said. "Your family have been telling us all about it. What a saga your courtship has been, Edward!"

"It had elements of the medieval epic at times," Edward said wryly. Everyone laughed. "I hope that stage of our lives is over with."

"Well, tell us all about the wedding," Irina urged. "Alice wanted to wait until you arrived to give us the details."

"We should sit down," Carmen pointed out, nodding to me.

"Oh! Of course." Tanya waved us over to the area near the fireplace, where heavy, Arts and Crafts style chairs, tables, and a settee were arranged around the hearth. I sat down on the settee, and Edward beside me. The others took the remaining furniture, and when seating ran out, just stood where they were. I reminded myself that they were perfectly comfortable standing upright.

"Alice said you had found lodgings nearby; but surely you'll stay with us while you're here?" Tanya asked Edward.

"Thank you, but we're very comfortable where we are," Edward told her firmly. "We've rented a house, about ten miles southeast."

"And you drove all the way here from Washington?" she asked, still addressing Edward rather than me. "It must have seemed very slow."

"Not at all." Edward took my hand and smiled at me. "It gave us an opportunity to talk. We both enjoyed the journey immensely." I smiled back at him.

Tanya looked searchingly from Edward to me, and nodded slowly. "Bella," she said, turning to me at last. "It was kind of you to make the trip just to meet us. Let me officially welcome you into the family - my new little cousin." I just smiled, a bit nonplussed. I realized she'd come to some kind of resolution about me. "Now, tell me all about the wedding."

I tried to ignore the many pairs of eyes on me. "Well...it was small, of course. Just my mother and stepfather, my dad and his friend, and the Cullens. We got married in Carlisle's church, right there in Forks, and had the reception at their house."

"What kind of wedding gown did you wear?" Irina asked. "Has anybody got pictures?"

"I have." Rosalie handed over a small album of photos. The Denali gathered in a cluster to look.

"Oh, the blue dress!" Irina exclaimed. "Very pretty, but no wedding gown?"

"Bella preferred something more informal," Esme explained.

"She's intimidated by glamour," Rosalie said, winking at me.

"I'm amazed Alice let you get away with that!" Tanya joked.

I laughed. "I'm a little surprised, myself. But actually, everyone indulged me completely where the wedding was concerned."

"That's as it should be," Carmen said. "Where is Rosalie?" She studied the photographs carefully.

"She's outside the range of some of the pictures," Esme said. "She was responsible for the music. You can see her here." She flipped the pages and pointed to a photo taken at an angle, in which Rosalie could be seen to one side, sitting at the keyboard.

They moved on to snapshots of the reception. "This must be your mother, Bella," Kate said. "You look like her. Is that your father with her?"

"No, that's my stepdad, Phil. My parents are divorced. That's Charlie, my dad, right there."

"Who is the woman with him?"

"His girlfriend, Sue Clearwater."

"One of the Quileute," Jasper said, "and mother of two of the wolves."

"Oh, my!" Carmen looked shocked. "And yet she came to the wedding?" She looked at me.

"Sue is very broad-minded."

"I suppose she must be," Irina said, looking at me oddly.

They studied and laughed over the rest of the pictures, and received a complete play-by-play from the family; then the conversation became more general. As the new member, I was necessarily the centre of attention at least some of the time, and I tried to take that in stride. I was asked about my background, how Edward and I had met, how I'd come to know the truth about him. Edward noted how quickly I'd come to understand what he was. "She's amazingly perceptive," he said, looking down at me. "She not only worked out the truth about us, but somehow managed to conclude that I could read thoughts in general, but not hers."

"That's something of a leap," Eleazar said. He'd been watching me rather closely during the discussion. "Vampires aren't traditionally associated with mind reading. Had you given her any hints to that effect?"

Edward shook his head. "Not that I'm aware of."

"How did you figure it out, Bella?" Kate asked, grinning.

"It's not a big deal. I heard some of the Quileute legends from a friend on the reserve, about their meetings in the past with what they call the Cold Ones. That pointed me in the right direction."

"Not much to go on," Irina said. "Even less to make you guess Edward is telepathic."

"Well, I had a dream about it. A couple of dreams. That sorted things out for me."

Eleazar looked interested. "Do you have dreams of this kind often?"

"Once in a while." I shrugged.

"She tells me her dreams often provide information she's been in need of," Edward said. "She's come to some startling conclusions."

"Such as?" Tanya asked.

"She recognized that Victoria, the newborn army, and a vampire who passed through our area were all part of the same plan. None of us had made the connection."

"She figured out things about Edward," Alice said, "apart from his being a vampire and a mind reader. Things he'd kept secret from her." Her expression told the others that the exact details were personal, and they didn't enquire.

"Her mother seems to be strikingly intuitive as well." Edward was watching Eleazar. "So you think it's significant?"

"Definitely. I can't be sure to what extent, at this point," he said, still watching me. "I can see the shield, of course - it's amazingly powerful for someone still in their human state. The other thing is present, but undeveloped."

I was mystified, and turned to Edward for explanation. "Eleazar's gift is to perceive the gifts of others," he said. "He can see your ability to shield your mind."

"You mean, the reason Edward can't read my thoughts?"

"Yes," Eleazar said. "And the reason Aro's guard were unable to affect you with their own gifts."

"So it's not just that something's odd about my brain?"

They all laughed. "Not at all," Eleazar said. "It's a talent. A very profound one, evidently, to manifest itself so forcefully while you're still human." He turned to Carlisle. "Who knows how it might develop after her transformation?"

Everyone looked at me, causing me to turn red. Alice laughed. "Bella just hates being the centre of attention."

"She'd better get used to that," Kate laughed. "Not one, but _two_ gifts, and before she's even been transformed? How do you find them, Carlisle?"

Carlisle shook his head, smiling. "It was Edward who found Bella. But it is definitely a gift, then? A mental shield?" he asked Eleazar.

"Yes, absolutely. As for the other, it's clearly a gift of perception. Also well established, but still somewhat unformed. It will be interesting to see how it develops."

"Um...I'm a little confused," I said. "You mean the fact that...that nobody can get into my mind, you consider it a talent?"

"It _is_ a talent, most definitely." Eleazar nodded decisively.

"But it doesn't actually do anything."

"It protects you," Edward pointed out. "Jane wasn't able to hurt you; and even Aro couldn't see your thoughts."

"I guess that's useful," I said dubiously.

Eleazar chuckled. "You must bear in mind, this ability is still in its embryonic stage. After your change, it will almost certainly reach its full stature."

"Those of us with gifts typically don't notice any unusual abilities while they're still human," Tanya told me. "The gifts are, at most, a knack. Your brother Jasper, for example, could have been unusually charismatic as a human, but not magically so. Edward might have been seen as someone who was adept at reading people's facial expressions. Only after their change did these things appear as unusual talents."

Eleazar nodded. "You, on the other hand, have a very distinctive ability already, while still human. It's hard to imagine what it may develop into following your transformation."

"I don't see what more it _could_ do. If everyone's already blocked out of my mind, well...what's next? They can't get any _more_ blocked out."

"Ah, but there are other possibilities." Eleazar seemed to warm to the topic. "You may be able to expand your 'block' and shield other people, as well as yourself. You may be able to use it not only as a passive defence, but as a weapon. It could develop in ways we haven't yet thought of."

I gulped, uncomfortable with the speculative way everyone was looking at me.

"As for the secondary gift," Eleazar went on, "that is less pronounced at present, but just the fact that it can be identified at all..."

"Sorry, but I don't understand about this, er, secondary gift. You mean my dreams?"

Eleazar hesitated, studying me closely for a moment. His eyes glazed, the way Alice's did when she looked into the future. "Not just dreams. No..." he murmured. He seemed to be speaking to himself. "That's just one way they manifest. The conscious and unconscious working in tandem. Hmm." He tilted his head thoughtfully, and finally spoke to me directly. "You've seen things when awake as well."

"Seen things?"

"Yes. Some of these insights, they didn't come from dreams, or not entirely."

"I don't know what to say. I don't think I have any special insights. I think I just made a couple of lucky guesses."

Eleazar shook his head. "No, my dear. I am certain of my own gift, and it never leads me astray. Tell me about this 'lucky guess' regarding your old enemy, Victoria."

"Well...Jacob and I were talking about how strange it was, all these things happening at once. Victoria turning up, and all the killings in Seattle, and then somebody breaking into my house."

"Jacob?" Eleazar asked.

"One of the werewolves," Carlisle explained. "Also a family friend since childhood."

"I see. And?"

"And...I don't know. Everything just seemed to click into place suddenly. It all made sense. The three things weren't separate after all. I told Jacob, and Edward and Emmett were nearby and heard me, and...that's about all."

"Very good," Eleazar murmured. "And these dreams? The ones that provide you with information? Can you...? But no," he corrected himself. "I'm embarrassing you with my questioning. We don't want to spend our very first visit interrogating you. Forgive me."

"It's okay," I said, relieved that he was changing the subject.

Kate diverted the conversation by bringing up more wedding questions. "I'll bet the ladies made their own outfits," she said, holding up a group photo from the reception. "That bridesmaid dress has Alice written all over it."

"You're right," Rosalie said. "Esme made her own, and Alice made mine. Not to mention designing the bride's dress."

I looked down at the photograph, back at Esme, Rosalie and Alice, and at the photo once more. "They all look so nice, especially considering they were making a point of dressing down. They didn't want to look _too_ good. You know, so I wouldn't fade out too much by comparison." I chuckled at the idea of the three of them conspiring not to show me up at my own wedding.

"Is that true?" Irina asked.

"There!" Eleazar exclaimed. "That's the gift! I could _feel_ it in action. Ha!" He looked excitedly at Carlisle. "Just for a second, then it subsided again."

"You're sure?" Carlisle asked.

"Absolutely certain. Yes, this should become interesting." He beamed at me.

I had no idea how to react. "What, you mean what I just said about their clothes?"

"Yes!"

"You're perfectly correct, Bella," Esme told me. "We did take pains to avoid being too, er, gaudy, for the reason you suggested. But how would you know that, if none of us told you?"

"Well, because..." I broke off, confused. "I'm not sure. I just _did_." I looked at Eleazar. "That was really...?"

"It was."

"Kind of pointless, using this...whatever you call it, to figure out why people chose an outfit. Shouldn't it show me something important?"

"It doesn't necessarily work that way, Bella," Alice said. "I don't only see really crucial things, unless I"m looking for them. I'm just as likely to foresee the yellow lines being repainted on the main street in Forks, or something. You can't always control it."

I sat looking at the floor a moment, holding Edward's hand tightly, a little overwhelmed with all the new data.

"Why don't we show Bella the house?" Carmen suggested.

"Good idea." Tanya rose gracefully to her feet and beckoned me. "Edward, in the meantime, you might want to occupy yourself with our newest acquisition. We had it delivered just in time for your visit." She gestured to one corner, where a piano stood - an oddly foreshortened version of Edward's piano. Edward examined it curiously.

"It's an electronic piano," Irina explained. "Carmen and I wanted to learn, and it's not easy getting a grand piano delivered up here. This one weighs far less, takes up less space, and never needs tuning."

"Interesting." Edward struck a few keys experimentally. "The tone is actually quite nice."

"Go on," Tanya urged him, "play something for us."

He willingly sat down, ran through scales briefly to try out the instrument, and launched into a piece I'd never heard before.

"Come on, Bella," Tanya said. "Let me give you the grand tour." Kate came along with us, and Esme got up to follow, saying she wanted to see what changes they'd made in the place. "You've seen the living area, of course." She passed the bookshelves, and I quickly tried to get a glimpse of the titles as we went by. There seemed to be volumes in English, Spanish, Latin, what looked like Russian, and a few that I thought were Hebrew. I was a little intimidated until I noticed a complete leather-bound set of Jane Austen on a lower shelf, right next to an oversized Alice in Wonderland.

"The kitchen," Tanya said briefly, leading me through a rather small, galley-style workspace. "We have to have one, to keep up appearances, but we didn't want to devote a lot of space to it."

"It looks quite, er, plausible, though," I said. Kate laughed.

"Media room. At least, that's what we use it for." Tanya walked from the kitchen to what seemed to be intended as the dining area, set up with a flatscreen and some casual seating, benches and oversized cushions. Wall shelves held a vast collection of DVD's. "It's meant to be a dining room. Fortunately, we don't have to keep up the pretence in this case. We're supposed to be some sort of arty bohemian commune, so naturally we'd defy convention and take our meals just _anywhere_." She threw her arms wide in a caricature of wild abandon, and I giggled.

"Eleazar's study," Tanya announced, opening the door to a smaller room off the main living area. It contained more bookshelves and a large writing desk. "And the sunporch." This was a small addition with windows on three sides, facing the mountains. "I use it as a sewing room, and just as a quiet space." I saw that a sewing machine and dressmaking paraphernalia were arranged in one corner, a small desk in another.

"So this is your study, sort of?" I asked. Tanya smiled and nodded. "That's such a beautiful view," I said, looking out the windows at the distant peaks.

"Yes, I love it," she said. She saw me glance at the sewing corner. "Do you sew, Bella?"

"Not really. Just ordinary mending." On impulse, I asked, "Who owns all those books against the far wall?"

"Oh, Eleazar's make up the lion's share," she smiled, "but everyone's books are all mixed together. Are you a reader?"

"Kind of."

My answer seemed to please her for some reason. She linked arms with me and led me to the next area. "This is the studio," she said, opening a door to reveal an open, unfurnished room with windows on one side providing the all-important southern exposure. "Two studios, in fact. Carmen and Irina both paint." There were two easels set up, one at each end of the space, along with tables and painting supplies.

"So that's not just a cover story?"

"Oh, no. They sell just enough of their work to keep the story believable. But they'd paint for their own enjoyment regardless."

I looked at the nearest easel, which held a half finished canvas. It seemed to be a kind of fantasy landscape, a minutely detailed scene of a forest with a stream running through it, but somehow not like any forest that actually exists. I stared at the vibrant colours and the strange, almost eerie mix of light and shadow. I finally looked up to find the others watching me, and flushed. "It's beautiful," I said, gesturing to the canvas.

"Yes," Tanya agreed. "That's Carmen's work."

I followed Tanya up the wide wooden staircase to a gallery that overlooked the living space, the sound of Edward's playing following us. "Kate's room," Tanya said, opening a door onto a lovely room decorated in muted jewel tones. There was a daybed in one corner but no real sleeping space. The room adjoined a sitting room, with a computer desk and a work table in one corner, a stereo system in another.

"Kate gets the master bedroom suite, since she doesn't have another work area, like the rest of us do," Tanya explained. "This is Irina's room, and here's mine." Irina favoured pastels, while Tanya's room was all in earth tones.

"They're all charming," Esme said. "Those curtains are new, aren't they?"

"Yes, I made them myself." They fell into a discussion of fabrics and window treatments that I mostly tuned out of. I'd noticed the little bookcase in Tanya's room, which contained some very familiar items: Dickens, Bronte, some poetry anthologies, a few history books, and...a collection of what seemed to be sex manuals. One or two I'd heard of, but never read; the rest were unfamiliar, one of them apparently a guide to tantric sex - whatever that was. I quickly looked away as the others turned to leave the room.

Tanya led us to the end of the corridor. "This is Carmen and Eleazar's room." She opened the door to the one room which actually contained a bed. "And that's about it."

"It's a beautiful house," I told her.

"Thank you, _sestrenka_." I took that to mean sister, and I appreciated the thought. "We like it here. It's a shame we can't stay here permanently."

"Can't you? Why?"

"You understand how it is with us, don't you? We have to go before people start to notice that we stay forever young."

"Oh, of course."

"We have a year or two, I think. I'm glad you were able to visit us here before we moved on. We all love this place so much. And it's all the more special because we were once neighbours to Carlisle's family, and remained in fairly close proximity even after they left Alaska. It can be such a boon to be in contact with others who live as we do."

"Other 'vegetarians'," I nodded. "I can imagine." I had been prepared to find Tanya unlikable, maybe because I still resented, just a tiny bit, the fact that she'd once coveted Edward; but I found myself liking her tremendously.

She grinned and put an arm around my shoulders. "Let's take a look at the outside." Kate veered off to rejoin the others, but Esme followed us out the back door.

The door opened onto a raised wooden deck, with steps leading down to a small patio lined with paving stones. There was no attempt at a garden, in the usual sense, but the clearing was decorated with simple arrangements of rocks: artfully stacked rocks, pebbles forming a bed for a fallen cedar branch, rocks in a terraced formation. "Oh, I love this!" I said.

"It's unusual," Esme said, surveying the rocky garden. "Rather Zen, isn't it?"

"It reminds me of Arizona, where I grew up."

"Really?" Esme turned to me. "That's odd, considering how different the landscape is here."

"I know. It's just that it's so stark, in a beautiful way. It's like the deserts around Phoenix." I looked around, delighted. "Who did these?"

"I did," Tanya said. "Piling rocks is my one form of artistic expression."

"It's great." I walked slowly around the clearing, examining the formations. I looked back to see Tanya hesitating to follow, and wondered why. Esme smiled and walked away from the house toward me, gesturing for Tanya to follow, and I realized that the sun had moved past the surrounding trees and was now overhead. Esme and Tanya sparkled like jewels as they walked toward me.

"I should have known it wouldn't upset you," Tanya said, "but I'm not used to letting humans see me in the sunlight." I smiled in understanding. "What did you think, I wonder, the first time you saw Edward this way?"

I thought back. "It was shocking, of course, and hard to get used to; but I thought it was beautiful. I remember thinking..." I blushed, and Esme smiled at me encouragingly. "Well, I thought that it was only right. Edward was so special, it made sense that he shone like a diamond in the sun. Why should the sun just strike his skin and sit there, like with any ordinary person? Just silly random thoughts, you know." I blushed harder.

"That's so sweet, Bella," Esme said, hugging me softly.

"Your family told me about your courtship with Edward. It _is_ very romantic, although I must say you were fortunate to have survived the first few weeks."

"I know I was," I agreed. "But that didn't matter any more."

"No, I understand," Tanya said pensively. "It seems Edward was right to hold out." I left that cryptic message alone, and turned back to the house.

Tanya took my arm again as we walked back into the house and rejoined the others. The discussion had by now broken up into multiple groups, one discussing the upcoming trip to New Hampshire, another talking politics, and a third arguing over some movie they'd both seen. I sat back down beside Edward, slipping effortlessly into the conversation he was having with Kate and Eleazar. I had thought it would take a long time to be at ease with the Denali, but I already felt very much like one of the family.


	9. Northern Lights

At around noon the Denali, who did not keep perishable items in their kitchen, fed me an indifferent lunch from cans, and we spent the rest of the afternoon with them. Edward and I left in the late afternoon with a promise to join them the next day for a visit to Anchorage, and returned to our own temporary home.

Edward had rented what he called a 'cabin' in a secluded spot beside a tiny lake. It was actually a handsome, chalet-style two bedroom house of red cedar, with all the amenities. He'd surprised me when we first arrived by scooping me up in his arms and carrying me over the threshold. "Tradition," he'd insisted.

"You didn't carry me through the door of our hotel rooms," I pointed out, laughing.

"Hotels don't count," he said firmly. "This house is ours, at least for a while."

We'd stopped for groceries on the way, and the kitchen was fully stocked. I was kind of pleased to be able to do my own cooking again. "What's for dinner?" Edward asked as I rummaged around in the fridge.

"Nothing you'll be eating." I sautéed a small chicken breast in lemon juice and garlic, and steamed green beans.

"You shouldn't really have to cook on your honeymoon," Edward fretted.

"Edward, I don't mind cooking! It's not really work. You can help with the dishes if you want, though."

"I will. What did you think of our cousins?" He sat down at the kitchen table across from me as I began to eat.

"I like them," I said decisively. "Eleazar is the intellectual of the family, I think. Tanya said most of the books in their library were his; and he sounds educated, even though you said none of them have been to college."

"He's very well read," Edward agreed. "What about Carmen?"

"She's sweet. Kind of like Esme, a little bit. They're both artistic; and they're both very affectionate. I think she's just as smart as Eleazar, in an understated way."

"I'd have to agree with that."

"The three sisters are fun. Kate's a little bit too adventurous for me - at least for now." She'd wanted to know if I enjoyed rock climbing, apparently with the idea that it would make a good recreational outing while we were visiting. "Maybe I'll enjoy her company more after I can no longer fracture bones."

He grinned. "Maybe so."

"Irina is interesting to talk to. She likes Jane Austen; that broke the ice a bit. She was a little bit stiff with me at first. That was because of Laurent, wasn't it?"

"Yes," he admitted. "She was slightly shocked that you were friends with some of the wolves; but she was over it by the time we left. She doesn't hold it against you."

"That's good. I think I liked Tanya the best."

"Really?"

"Yeah. She's funny, and she's really kind underneath her sarcasm. She's the head of the family, isn't she?"

"Yes. She's the oldest, since her creator died."

"Creator. That sounds so odd. Do you think of Carlisle as your _creator_?"

"No; I think of him as my friend, or as my father. But that's the usual term." He laughed suddenly. "I used to, on rare occasions, call him my creator, just to rattle him. Somehow it doesn't seem fitting in our case."

"No, it doesn't." I took another bite of chicken. "So is the oldest family member always the leader?"

"Not necessarily. It's often the case, but there's no hard and fast rule. Of course," he said thoughtfully, "there are different kinds of leadership. Carlisle leads us mainly by example and inspiration. We all look to him as head of the family because we respect his wisdom, and know he acts for our good. He accepts the position, but he's hardly an autocrat. It's rare for him to make a unilateral decision."

"I know what you mean. I can't imagine Carlisle barking out orders, but at the same time, it's like he's wearing an invisible crown. You can _feel_ that he's the natural leader of the family."

"It might have been better if he had exerted his authority, when I announced we had to leave you behind," he said quietly. "He was opposed to the idea, but I thought I knew best."

I met his eyes across the table. "Maybe it would have been better, but...it's over now." I took his hand. "We're married, and we'll never be separated again."

His gloom evaporated. Probably the word _married_ did the trick. "Now, Tanya is in a slightly different position," he continued as I ate. "She was very much the benevolent dictator of her coven, when it was just herself and her two sisters, and they accepted that. Eleazar and Carmen joined their family as a couple. They're both centuries old, although still younger than Tanya, and it didn't feel right to insist they accept Tanya's authority absolutely. So they have a kind of two-tier political arrangement, in which Tanya is head of her original family, Kate and Irina; and nominal leader of the largely independent entity consisting of Carmen and Eleazar."

"Kind of like Scotland's position in the United Kingdom."

He gave a bark of laughter. "Something like that, I suppose."

"It sounds very complicated."

"Those aren't actually formal rules. It's more nuanced. It just means that Tanya can make decisions on behalf of Kate and Irina in cases where she wouldn't presume to do so for Eleazar or Carmen. When the entire family has to convene and make a decision about something significant, Tanya is careful to allow everyone, but especially Eleazar and Carmen, a voice in the matter at hand."

"It seems to work for them. I don't see any sign of hostility."

"No, it works very well. It wouldn't work among conventional vampires, though." I nodded. I'd had it explained to me: refraining from human blood made them less volatile, less territorial, less aggressive. It was what allowed both families to live in peace with such a large number of members.

I finished my meal and washed the few dishes while Edward dried. "It's quite warm out this evening," he pointed out. "Would you like to go for a swim?"

"Sure." I turned toward the bedroom to get my swimsuit, but he stopped me.

"Bella, we're alone in the forest, with nobody for miles around."

It took me a second to get his point. "Oh! Okay," I said, turning red but still happy to accept his invitation. I kicked my shoes off and, hesitating at first, pulled my shirt over my head. Edward watched me, slowly unbuttoning his own shirt. Encouraged, I slid out of my slacks and draped them over a kitchen chair. I walked toward the back door, removing my underwear and dropping each item on the floor as I went. Without looking back, I stepped through the door and walked toward the lake, a little surprised at myself.

Edward let me almost reach the lake before he caught up with me, swinging me up into his arms and kissing me until I was breathless. "Temptress! Whatever happened to the nervous, bashful girl I married?"

"I don't know," I gasped. "Do you miss her?"

"Mmm." He kissed my throat. "I think I prefer her replacement."

"Oh?"

"Yes. Are we still going for a swim?"

"Absolutely," I said, although I was wondering what else he had in mind. "Let me down."

He set me on my feet, hung a towel over a tree branch and followed me to the rocky edge of our small but crystal clear lake. I walked to the end of the little wooden pier, dangling my legs in the water for a minute to get used to the temperature. Even now, in summer, the water was fairly cold. Edward leapt directly into the lake's deepest part, splashing me slightly, and I took a deep breath and slid into the chilly water.

The sun was low in the sky, causing pink and gold and orange lights to glimmer over the surface of the lake, and across Edward's skin. I quickly became accustomed to the temperature, and Edward and I floated together, kissing and talking, carefree as children. I tried swimming down to the bottom of the lake, which I managed to reach; then Edward served as diving board, lifting me up and letting me jump from his supporting arms into the water. When I started to shiver, he towed me back to the pier and lifted me up, jumping effortlessly from the water to the shore, grabbing the towel and wrapping it around me before the night air could chill me further. He picked me up and ran me back into the cabin.

"Are you all right?"

"Sure," I said. "Just a little cold."

He disappeared, returning almost immediately. I could hear the shower running. "Come on," he said, "let's warm you up." He joined me in the shower, standing with me under the hot spray until I was no longer chilled, and his skin was pleasantly warm, then, by mutual agreement, we went early to bed.

He was in an experimental mood that night. I was soon panting and distracted, noting vaguely how wonderfully uninhibited the married Edward was. He moved his lips close to my ear. "Bella, my sweet," he whispered, "can you lie perfectly still for me? I want to try something."

* * *

I was sound asleep when a voice woke me. "Bella? Wake up, love."

"What?" It was so unlike Edward to deliberately disturb my sleep, I thought something must be wrong. I sat up, still groggy. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing, sweetheart. Just something you might like to see. Come outside with me."

Confused, I wrapped a sheet around myself and followed him to the back door. "Look," he said, pointing at the sky.

I blinked, trying to make sense of what I was seeing. "Oh!" I said, realizing. It was the Aurora Borealis, and it was having a real night out. "Oh my goodness! I can _hear_ it!" I stood still, listening to the faint roar and watching the shifting colours move across the sky. I stood and watched so long, my legs became tired, and Edward picked me up and let me watch while cradled in his arms. The lights were still visible when I fell asleep against his shoulder, and I woke the next morning with no memory of having returned to bed.

"Thank you for waking me last night!" I said, sitting up. "That was amazing!" I threw my arms around him, and he kissed me.

"You've never seen the northern lights before?"

"No, never. I've never been further north than Washington before."

I hopped out of bed and hurried to the bathroom, then ran full speed back to the bed and jumped in beside him, making him laugh. "Do you need more sleep?" he asked, his voice velvet.

"Not at all," I said, twining my arms and legs around him. "But I think I need a little more time in bed."

The sun was streaming through the window by the time we were ready to separate and start the day. Edward insisted on making me breakfast in bed, and did a wonderful job of it, too, producing a perfect omelette and serving it with cinnamon toast and freshly squeezed orange juice. "You spoil me rotten," I said with a sigh of satisfaction.

He removed the tray with a smile, and I finally got up and started choosing my clothing. "We're going to the big city today, right? Do I need to dress up?"

"Anchorage is a fairly informal place, but we'll probably be having dinner out. Besides, you'll have to pass muster with Alice."

"True." I chose a two piece outfit Alice had carefully packed in a garment bag along with the dressier items. It had a short black linen skirt and black and cream short sleeved jacket, and looked, to my eyes, stylish enough for any venue we might venture into, without making me feel conspicuous or overdressed. I pulled on a pair of flats. "There. How do I look?"

"Gorgeous." He looked me over with every sign of approval.

"So do you," I said. "That looks great on you." Just tan slacks and a lightweight navy pullover, but they fit him like a glove and made him look like an advertisement for lust.

"I'm glad you think so." He gave me a little smirk. "I choose my clothes with you in mind, of course."

"Your efforts are appreciated," I told him, reminding myself that it didn't hurt to reciprocate a little bit. Why was I so resistant to dressing up, if it made Edward - and Alice - happy, and did me no harm? I ogled him blatantly, and he laughed and kissed me.

"It's very sunny. Are you sure this is the right day?"

"Alice was sure, and that's pretty conclusive. Clouds should be rolling in before long."

We drove directly to Anchorage, having arranged to meet the others in front of a downtown coffee shop. "Will we be very late?" I asked as we got into the car. I didn't want to keep everyone waiting. I looked at the dashboard clock. "It's only eight-thirty!"

"We went to bed terribly early last night, if you recall," he said complacently.

I flushed slightly. "I recall. But it seems so much later. I'm still not used to the long days." The sun rose before five a.m. this time of year in Alaska, and set after eleven.

We reached Anchorage by ten, the sky fully overcast as predicted, and found everyone except Carmen, Eleazar, and Kate waiting by the coffee shop. "They're coming in the same car," Irina explained. "They should be here any minute."

"Bella, you look very chic." Alice looked me over appraisingly.

"I _should_, since you picked out all my clothes," I joked.

The red Subaru pulled in at the curb a few minutes later, and the group was complete.

"What are we doing first?" Irina asked.

"Some of us wanted to go shopping," Alice said, "and I think Irina had business at that little art gallery around the corner."

Irina held up a large, flat parcel wrapped in brown paper. "Just dropping off a couple of pieces."

"There's a very extensive second-hand book shop about two blocks from here," Carlisle pointed out.

That caught my interest. "Really?"

We agreed to split up for the first two hours. Carlisle, Carmen and I would check out the bookstore, the others would divide up and go where they would, and we'd meet again at noon. Edward and I clung together a moment before going our separate ways; it felt ridiculously hard to leave him, even for such a short time. The others grinned affectionately at our little display.

Crowley's Book Emporium was all a second-hand bookstore should be. I started out by looking, as usual, at the discount racks and cheap paperbacks. At one point, I noticed some gorgeous old leatherbound books in a display case near the entrance, and automatically ignored them as out of my price range. Then it struck me that I was now proprietor of one-eighth of the Cullen fortune, and could buy any book I wanted without a second thought. I could buy this whole shop, for that matter, probably without maxing out my credit card.

Resolving to make up for my self-indulgence by putting money in the first charity box I encountered, I left the cheap shelves behind and headed for the hardbound volumes on the second floor. Carmen was already there, looking through Spanish language literature, and we exchanged the gleeful smiles of fellow book lovers. I studied the shelves leisurely, and eventually found a copy of _Eminent Victorians_, a biography Edward had mentioned during our in-car book talks; _The Professor_, a novel by Charlotte Bronte which Rachel Black had recommended; _Pnin_, a short novel Esme once said she'd enjoyed; and _My Antonía_, which I'd always meant to read but somehow hadn't gotten around to. I chose the best quality edition of each book, with barely a glance at the price. It was a new experience for me.

I moved on to the third floor, hugging my finds against my chest, and scanned the topic labels at the end of each row of shelves. Mathematics - pass. Physics - likewise. I walked more slowly past several scientific sub-categories, determining to come back for a quick look if there was time. The last few shelves were marked Anatomy, Physiology, Health, and finally Medicine. I was about to turn around and go back when I realized Carlisle was standing between the final two shelves, a heavy volume open in his hands.

"Oh! Hi."

He smiled warmly. "Bella. I see you've had some success."

I looked down at the books in my arms. "Yes. This place is fantastic."

"It's nice to have another avid reader in the family."

"I have a long way to go." He looked at me inquiringly. "I mean, all of you have multiple college degrees, medical degrees; you all speak multiple languages." I laughed. "It makes me feel a little bit backward."

"But you're not; you've just had far less time than the rest of us. You'll catch up, I have no doubt."

"I hope so." I looked at the book in his hands. "You really like reading medical textbooks? Even old ones?"

"Sometimes the efforts, and even the mistakes, of past doctors and researchers can shed light on present-day medical puzzles."

"Are you interested in medical research?" I found it kind of fascinating to think of a vampire's capabilities set to the task of solving the predicaments that went with being human.

"In a theoretical way." He described some reading he'd been doing on past efforts to eradicate cancer. He seemed to realize my interest wasn't merely polite. "Perhaps you'd like to study medicine at some point."

"Maybe. It seems like something that would be beyond me."

"That may change more than you expect."

I returned his smile. "It's kind of mind boggling. I'm relieved I'll have all of you to, well, to lean on while I'm getting used to everything."

"You know you'll always have that." Carlisle replaced his book on the shelf and began to stroll across the room, toward the philosophy section, and I walked with him.

"I realize I'm joining the family after all the hard work is done. Figuring out how to keep from hunting humans, how to stay hidden. How to live among humans. It'll be so easy for me, by comparison."

"I understand what you're saying; but there's still work to be done, and always will be. Each new member of our family has changed us, changed the way we see things, and the way we live. You'll do the same." I shrugged skeptically, and he laughed. "I know you doubt your influence, but you should not. You don't realize, not having been with us before, how completely you've changed Edward. You've also had a surprising effect on Rosalie."

That startled me. I hadn't done anything in particular to Rosalie, not that I could tell.

"We all affect one another. There's no doubt that you'll be changed as well."

"That I can believe," I said. "I'm a different person than I was before I knew all of you."

"We are all interested to see how you fit into the family after you become one of us," he said with a smile. "I should say, _if_ you become one of us," he added, not looking as if he regretted the error. "Edward has warned us all not to make you feel as if it were expected."

I rolled my eyes. "Really? Still?"

"No, I agree with him, in principle. This is something you must do freely and of your own volition, or not at all. You may change your mind at any time, and no one will question your decision. However, I admit that I do not expect you will."

"No. I've worked through any...concerns I might have had. I don't look forward to the pain, but I guess that's unavoidable."

He looked grave. "I'm working with Edward on ways to reduce or eliminate the pain. We have no way to test any method we select, unfortunately; but we'll do our best."

"Thanks."

He patted my shoulder, and reached up to take a book from an upper shelf. "Now, here's a book you might enjoy." He held up an old volume with the gilt design almost completely worn off, the embossed letters in an unfamiliar alphabet. "In fact, I'm sure you will. But later on," he said, adding the book to his other selections. "_After_ you've learned Greek."

As I was getting ready to make my purchases, I noticed a small book, bound in deep red leather, in the display case with all the 'collectible' books. I bent over to look, just because I liked its appearance, and saw that it was a collection of the love poems of Pablo Neruda. I remembered Edward quoting one of them to me. I asked the middle-aged man behind the counter if I could see it. He gave me a dubious look, but silently unlocked the case and took out the book. It was beautiful. There was no publishing information printed anywhere, which I took to mean the book was one of a kind, custom bound by its previous owner. The poems were printed in the original Spanish, with the English translation on the facing page, and illustrated with pen and ink drawings of the poet and scenes from his native Chile. "I'll take it," I said, placing the book lovingly on top of my stack of novels.

"_That_ book's $450," the counter man said, peering at me over his glasses.

"That's fine," I told him blithely. It was too perfect a gift to turn down, at any price. At the last second, I noticed some postcards from the Law Enforcement Museum, and bought one to send to Charlie.

We returned at about the same time to find the others straggling back as well, some of them carrying packages. I found Edward at our rental car, and walked over to stow my book purchases in the trunk. "What did you find?" I asked, noticing the small paper bag in his hand.

"A music store. They carried some hard to find items I was surprised to see."

"Nice."

"Bella," Alice said, "it's your turn." She waved her shopping bags meaningfully.

"Alice, you just bought me two suitcases full of new clothes for this trip! What more could I need?"

"Just a couple of items," she promised. "One hour."

"One hour," Edward told her sternly. "Then Bella needs to stop for lunch."

"Fair enough. Anyone else for the mall?" Rosalie and Tanya followed.

Remembering my earlier resolution, I was patient as Alice handed me articles of clothing and I tried them on. She noticed. "You're making much less of a fuss than you used to."

"Resistance is futile." She laughed. "Seriously, it's because you've started giving me clothes I can live with. They're not so high fashion any more. I really like the stuff you packed for the honeymoon."

She gave me an odd look. "I don't think I've changed my selection process all that much. Maybe _you're_ just getting accustomed to wearing things other than sweatshirts."

I considered that. "Well...maybe." She grinned and handed me another armload of garments to try on.

We met again at 1:30 and formed new groups. The Denali had some practical errands to do for the household, the Cullens went sightseeing, and Edward escorted me to a midtown restaurant for lunch. "Are you enjoying your day?" he asked me as I tucked into scallop risotto.

"Yes. The bookstore was great, and I had a nice talk with Carlisle. How about you?"

"Pleasant so far. You should be prepared; they all want to go clubbing later." I raised my eyebrows. "They just want a place to dance. We can leave at any time if you're uncomfortable."

"Okay." He surreptitiously switched my nearly finished risotto for his untouched house salad, and I started in on that.

At our usual meeting place, I noticed a poster in the coffee shop window. "Anchorage has an opera company?"

"Yes; they're actually pretty good." Tanya looked at the poster. "We've been to a few of their productions."

"Maybe we should all go. Do you like opera, Bella?" Carmen asked.

"I don't really know. I've never been to one."

"But you've heard the music at one time or another?" Edward asked.

"Sure. I liked it; but I think what I've heard are the highlights, the easy parts. I have no idea what to expect from a full length opera. I'd be happy to give it a try," I added hastily, not wanting to be a wet blanket.

"The Marriage of Figaro," Esme noted. "That's a good choice for a first opera."

Everyone agreed. We trooped around the corner and bought tickets for the following weekend, with seats as close together as they could manage for a group of thirteen.

Alice insisted on taking me back to the mall. "If you're going to the opera, you'll need a new dress!" Tanya came along this time, and located a midnight blue, sleeveless dress with a narrow silver belt, which I liked, and Alice approved. Mission accomplished.

We found Jasper, Carmen, and Eleazar at our meeting spot. "Everyone else is going their own way," Carmen told us. "We're supposed to convene here at nine and go to Dapper Dan's together."

"Bella is already a little tired," Jasper observed.

"Maybe you should try and get some rest," Alice told me. "We'll probably be there until closing time."

"All right. Thanks for helping me find clothes, Alice. Thanks, Tanya."

Alice laughed. "I never thought I'd hear her say that - not sincerely, anyway. Here," she added, handing me a shopping bag. "Put this on before you meet up with us. That outfit's fine for dinner, but it's a little too conservative for a nightclub."

"Okay." I stowed the bag in our rental car.

"Mind if we join you?" Alice asked. Edward gestured 'welcome' and she and Jasper fell into step with us as the others wandered in the opposite direction. We walked down the main street, stopping to look through shop windows and occasionally stop in and browse. An outdoor music festival was taking place, and the sound of folk music followed us as we walked.

As we turned down a side street, the stores became more varied and unusual. I was looking over the window display of a place that sold things like geodes and insects preserved in amber, when Alice pointed across the street. "Ooh!_ Les gadgets erotique_! Let's go look around." I saw Edward grimace irritably, but he made no objection. I followed willingly enough until Alice led us through the door of a small boutique called Entre Nous. I walked through the doorway and froze where I stood.

"This is a, er...it's a..." I wasn't sure what to call an establishment of this kind. I'd never been inside one. I had enough trouble buying new underpants at the department store.

"A sex shop," Alice said cheerfully, making a beeline for the shelves labelled Specialty at the back of the store.

Another customer came through the door, and I hastily moved out of the way, looking for a quiet corner where I could pretend to browse until the others were ready to leave.

Alice was happily rummaging through a selection of leather items whose exact purpose was unclear to me. Jasper wandered through the shop, his hands clasped behind his back, looking things over calmly. I looked over at Edward. He didn't seem particularly interested in the merchandise, but his expression was one of amused tolerance, not distress. Okay. I was an adult, a married woman. This wasn't such a big deal. I strolled as casually as I could around the perimeter of the store.

At that point, I spotted a display of rubber objects. Dozens of them, all shapes and sizes and colours. My embarrassment reached a level unprecedented in my life so far. In fact, I felt more than embarrassed; I felt imposed on, disturbed. Telling myself I was a grown woman and should be more sophisticated about these things didn't help. I just stood there, looking away from the display case and blinking rapidly.

Jasper turned toward me, evidently picking up signals. "Alice," he said, "I believe Bella is, as they used to say, quietly freaking."

Edward appeared instantly. "Come on, Bella," he said, taking my hand. "Let's wait outside."

I gladly left the shop with him, was led to a wooden bench outside the bugs-in-amber shop and sat down. Edward sat beside me, rubbing my hand soothingly. I was relieved to be out of there, but now I felt humiliated at the way I'd reacted. "Sorry," I mumbled, leaning my head against his shoulder.

"You've done nothing to be sorry for, love." He looked down at me. "Are you all right?"

"Sure, sure. I'm fine. I didn't mean to make a big deal out of it."

"I don't care for those places either, to tell the truth."

"But _you_ didn't freak out."

"Well, I imagine it's the first time you've been inside this kind of shop."

"Yeah."

Alice and Jasper left the store and crossed the street to join us, Alice carrying a purple Entre Nous shopping bag. I didn't speculate about the contents. "Sorry about that," I said. "I feel so silly! I mean, it's just a store."

"No, _I'm_ sorry you were upset." Alice put an arm around my waist.

"It's nothing." I looked down the street, anxious to change the subject. "Where to next?"

Alice took the hint. "Jazz wanted to see the Museum of Natural History. Shall we stop in?"


	10. City Lights

Late in the afternoon, Edward and I separated from the others so he could take me to dinner. We went to a restaurant with a view of the ocean, where I ate elk meat for the first time. As we left, Edward suggested I take a nap before the rest of the night's outing. "Okay, but where?" I asked. "In the car?"

He nodded toward a hotel at the end of the block. "We could rent a room."

"Just for a nap?"

"Why not? Besides, we'll likely be out quite late. We could stay here for the night, and save the drive home for the morning."

"Well...sure. Let's."

We went into the nautical-themed lobby, where the concierge frowned at our lack of luggage apart from some plastic shopping bags, but became quite cordial when Edward requested the "Gold Rush Suite" on the top floor. We stopped at the gift shop in the lobby to buy a few essentials, like a toothbrush, and took the elevator. I laughed when I saw our suite. Grabbing the Gold Rush theme and running with it, they'd decorated almost every square inch in shades of gold.

He laughed with me. "Is it okay?"

"It's great. It's like King Midas was the last one to stay here."

He grinned, looking around at the relentless goldness. "Shall we get some sleep?"

"What do you mean 'we,' Paleface?" He chuckled, and I headed for the bedroom. I wasn't at all sure I could sleep at this time of day, but I gamely removed my clothes and slipped between the sheets. Edward took his place beside me, leaving the covers between us to avoid chilling me. "You don't have to stay there," I said, curling up against him even as I spoke. "You'll be bored. You can go watch TV or something if you want."

"No, I'd rather be here. And I have my book." He held up a copy of a murder mystery he'd taken from the bookcase in the sitting room. "I'll wake you when it's time to meet the others." I snuggled closer to him. He began to softly hum, and I fell asleep in no time at all.

I woke up on my own, two hours later. "Did you sleep well, love?"

"Very well, thanks." I stretched. "Did the butler do it?" I gestured toward his discarded novel.

"No, the victim's business partner."

I checked the clock. "I'm going to take a quick shower before we go." I washed, brushed my hair, and left the bathroom to find Edward in tight jeans and a V neck, short sleeved pullover that emphasized the muscles of his arms and chest. "Wow!" He grinned at my reaction. I opened the shopping bag Alice had handed me and pulled out my outfit for the evening. "Hmm."

Edward came and looked. "I think that's fairly typical clubwear."

"I wouldn't know." Something occurred to me. "I'm not old enough to get into these places, am I?"

"No," he said indifferently. "Jasper will have your alternate ID when we get there."

"Fake ID. Look what you've reduced me to." I shook my head in mock disapproval, and put on Alice's outfit. I looked at myself in the full length mirror. "What do you think?"

He came to stand behind me. "I think I'm going to have to compete for your attention. You look ravishing."

I giggled. "I don't want to make you complacent, but you don't have any competition." I stood on my toes to kiss him. "Any more than I do."

"Very true. And I actually like complacency, at least in this area."

"So do I." I slipped on the little red sandals Alice had provided. "Ready."

We drove a little outside the downtown area, to what looked like a series of conjoined warehouses. A single neon sign identified it as Dapper Dan's. Music blasted from inside, and people, mostly young people, came and went, or clustered in the street near the club, some in clothing like mine and Edward's, some in jeans and tee shirts. Edward turned to the right. "There they are."

I didn't see anything, but a minute later all eleven came walking toward us from around the corner. "Hi, folks!" Emmett called out. "Ready to party?"

"Bella, I like that outfit on you!" Alice skipped forward, turning me around to see my clothes from all angles.

"Thanks. You look terrific, Alice." She wore an extremely short leather skirt and a red halter top with four inch heels. Her hair was spikier than usual, and her makeup a little more experimental. Surprisingly, even little Alice could pass for 21 as she looked now. I glanced around; they all looked great, naturally. Rosalie was still the most beautiful, but the three Denali sisters looked more provocative. They were already getting second glances from passers by.

Jasper silently handed me a Washington state driver's license in the name of Donna Stevens, which provided a birthdate three years earlier than my real one. I looked at him. "It will check out," he assured me.

"Thanks."

"Shall we go in?" Tanya led the way through the main doorway, and the others followed, flashing their ID at the doorman as they passed. I showed my new card to him nervously, but he merely glanced from it to me and moved on to the next person in line.

The interior of Dapper Dan's was vast; I couldn't even see the far end of the club from the entrance. There were multiple stages, multiple dance floors, and multiple bars. I clung to Edward's hand as our group wandered through the place, sizing up the options. The most distant stage was playing Motown hits, and most of the family seemed to favour that area. Everyone ordered drinks at the bar, and Edward asked what I'd like.

"Er...I don't drink."

He bent to speak into my ear, over the music. "You don't have to actually drink it. _We're_ not going to. But carrying around a drink is expected."

"Okay, then. Order me something that looks cool being carried around."

He grinned and turned back to the bar, returning with a glass of beer in one hand. In the other hand was a cocktail glass containing an amber coloured liquid. "A Brass Monkey," he said, handing it to me. "It's fairly popular among the comparatively temperate college students. Others prefer straight tequila." I smiled and took a sip.

We stood together near the bar with the others, listening to the music, until first Emmett and Rosalie, then the other couples one by one, left their untouched drinks and hit the dance floor. It was a pleasure to watch them, all so beautiful, and all such perfect dancers. The three sisters stayed at the bar, pretending to drink, seeming to be waiting for something. Presently a young man asked Kate if he could buy her a drink, even though the glass in front of her was obviously full. She agreed, and accompanied him to the bar. I remembered what Alice had told me about the sisters' recreational activities. I started watching them with more interest.

Tanya squeezed Irina's hand as if saying 'goodbye for now,' and wandered out to the edge of the dance floor, swaying dreamily to the music. Unattached men, and even some with partners, seemed to zero in on her at once. "It's amazing. She's like a Rapala fishing lure," I mused to myself. The lure no fish could resist. Edward gave me an odd look. "What?" I asked.

"That's very apt, but how do you know about Rapala lures?"

"I happen to be the daughter of a fishing enthusiast. I absorbed a lot of unwanted information over the years."

"Of course."

Kate was talking and laughing animatedly with her young man, who had bought her something in a tall glass. Over on the dance floor, one of the fish had responded, and was swaying along with Tanya, apparently trying to make entertaining comments into her ear. She smiled at him as if mildly amused, but not quite won over. Her dance partner seemed to find this irresistible. "She's really good at this," I noted.

Irina laughed, having apparently overheard, and I turned red. "Years and years of practice, _sestrenka_," she said. She stood up, smiled at both of us, and strolled out to the far end of the dance floor, some distance from Tanya. She had a partner before she'd even stopped walking.

I looked up at Edward, who raised an eyebrow. "Alice told you about them?"

"Sure. It's still kind of fascinating to see them in action."

He nodded. "Shall we dance?"

I gave him a look. "You _know_ I can't dance." I tried one more swallow of my drink.

"You can! Well enough to satisfy me, certainly." I hesitated. "It's Motown, Bella! The music tells you what to do."

I rolled my eyes, but stood up and took his hand. "Okay, but let's stay on the edge of the crowd, where I can't bump into anybody."

He led me to a dim, relatively empty corner where I danced cautiously, holding his hands. Eventually I unbent enough to move more freely, and even let him lead me into the occasional twirl or spin. I knew very well he was purposely holding back his own dancing to my level, but I also knew he didn't mind in the least. Besides, he wouldn't have to do that kind of thing for much longer. Impulsively, I flung my arms around his neck, and he embraced me, lifting my feet off the floor and swinging me in a circle. "Having fun, Mrs. Cullen?" he asked in my ear. I grinned and nodded. Anything, even dancing in public, was fun when I was with Edward. Soppy but true.

Our drinks had been cleared from the bar by the time Edward and I took a break from the dancing, so he ordered two more. He handed me a tall glass of something that looked like watered down Kool Ade. "I notice a lot of young women ordering these," he told me. I was thirsty, and the drink tasted mild and sweet, so I swallowed it in two long draughts. I looked around for the others. The Cullens were whooping it up on the dance floor, as were Carmen and Eleazar. Irina was at the bar, chatting with a very handsome, dark haired guy in his early twenties. Tanya was in a dark corner, kissing a tall, muscular young man. Kate was nowhere to be seen. Edward noticed me looking around. "Kate left with her escort about ten minutes ago," he said.

"Oh." I nodded, pondering. I knew that this kind of casual pairing up was pretty common; that I would have been exposed to a lot of it at college. I'd never thought of myself as puritanical - Renee certainly hadn't raised me that way - and I honestly wasn't offended by the three sisters' activities. I didn't feel disapproval; just a personal aversion. It was like watching someone eat liver and onions: no objection, but it definitely wasn't for me.

I looked up to find Edward watching me. "What are you thinking?" he said in my ear.

I shook my head, gesturing to indicate the noise level in the room. He sighed, but let it go. Still a little thirsty, I gestured toward the bar, and Edward offered me his own drink. I drank it down. "More dancing?" I asked. He smiled and led me back into the rhythmically moving crowd. I felt a little light headed, but much less self-conscious than I had earlier, and bobbed happily to the music. Tanya passed by on her way to the exit with her muscular friend, giving me a cheery wave goodbye as she went. "Bye, Tanya!" I called out, waving back. "Bye, Tanya's friend!" Edward seemed unaccountably amused by something or other.

Close to midnight, Alice and Jasper swept by, Alice looking back at Edward as she went. "They're all going to the bar across the street," he said, "for karaoke. Shall we join them?"

"Why not?"

Edward put an arm around my shoulders and steered me through the crowd to the exit, and we followed the Cullens across the street and into a brightly lit establishment decorated with neon tubing. Inside, a dense crowd was listening to a woman in her thirties sing Stand By Your Man in the style of Tammy Wynette. She got a nice round of applause, and the emcee took the microphone to announce the next singer.

"What do you say, Bella?" Alice asked. "Want to sing something with me?"

"Me? Well..." My odd lack of inhibition was still with me, and I actually considered it for a second. "What about Esme or Rosalie? Or Irina," I added, noticing that she had followed us in.

"Irina! What happened to your swain?" Alice asked her.

"Too drunk," she said, grimacing. "I'll sing with you if you want, Alice."

"Great!" They left to choose a song and prepare. Edward got drinks for us and found two seats, and the rest stood up near the back of the room. I took a sip, noticing that Edward had brought me a soft drink this time instead of a cocktail.

Alice and Irina were introduced and ran up to the microphone, where they performed _Ghost Riders In the Sky_ in flawless two-part harmony. They left the stage to warm applause and some whistles from the male patrons.

After two more performers came and went, Emmett and Rosalie took the stage to perform _Jackson_, Emmett's deep voice doing justice to the Johnny Cash part. Three college boys sang _Wild Thing _with great zest but not much musical ability. Esme urged Carlisle to take a turn, and he surprised me by agreeing at once. He sang a Tony Bennett ballad that had the women in the audience mesmerized. He grinned in our direction as Esme pretended to swoon at his final note, and acknowledge the applause with a slight bow before trotting back to join her.

"Jasper goes on last," Edward informed me.

"Why?"

He smiled. "You'll see."

The delay between performers became longer, and when it looked like nobody else was going to volunteer, Jasper ran up and spoke briefly to the emcee. "Okay," the man said, "it's almost time for last call, and you know what that means. Let's have a nice welcome for our last singer of the night - Chester!"

"Not Chester - _Jasper_!" Alice corrected under her breath. The female half of the audience seemed to come to attention as Jasper approached the microphone.

"Brace yourself," Edward said in my ear. I looked at him curiously, but he just nodded toward the stage.

Jasper sang _Heartbreak Hotel_, starting slowly and gradually working his way up to an intense, rather eccentric finish. The audience followed his every move, their excitement visibly growing throughout the performance. I found myself feeling the same way: as if Jasper's singing were the most exciting thing I'd ever witnessed. Only about halfway through the first chorus did I realize that Jasper himself was controlling the emotions of the people watching - myself included.

I looked up at Edward, and he confirmed my thoughts with a grin. Knowing my emotions were being controlled didn't alter the effect of Jasper's gift; I relaxed and threw myself into the role of enthralled audience member, standing up and cheering wildly when everyone else did. Every bar patron was on his feet for the final verse. A few women threw folded papers, presumably containing phone numbers or love letters, at him as he took a bow, and one or two tossed undergarments. Jasper left the stage and was called back twice to take an extra bow before the crowd could allow him to go.

"You shameless exhibitionist!" Edward laughed as Jasper rejoined us. Alice stood on her toes to give him a kiss. The bar patrons called out friendly comments and non-verbal expressions of enthusiasm, gradually settling down into a mood of quiet satisfaction - courtesy of Jasper's gift, I assumed. We waited until the crowd had thinned out, then left by a side exit.

"Dapper Dan's stays open another two hours," Irina pointed out. "Shall we go back?"

We spent another hour dancing and people watching, this time near a stage with an Eighties cover band. Irina finally left the club with one of her previous dance partners. Edward and I both seemed to have had enough at about the same time. We said our goodnights and returned to the hotel and our golden suite.

I slept in a little bit the next morning. "What time is the deadline for checkout here?" I asked Edward when I woke up, checking the bedside clock.

"Eleven, but we don't have to be out at any particular time. I took the room for two nights."

"Why?"

"In case you wanted to sleep late. Also, because it's supposed to be sunny except for a period in the mid afternoon, and I wanted to be sure we had options."

"I see."

"What do you feel like doing?"

"Honestly, after yesterday, I just want to lounge around for a while."

He grinned. "That sounds fine to me."

We did some serious lounging. We had breakfast sent to the room, then lay in bed and read together for an hour or so. Eventually, I got up, washed my hair and soaked in the giant whirlpool tub for a bit, and finally got dressed at noon.

I set up the laptop on our sitting room table, went online and checked my messages. Mom had replied to my last email, joking about the giant wheelbarrow mural and saying how happy she was I was having a good time, and philosophizing a little about honeymoons. I was relieved that she spoke generally, and didn't offer me any specific advice. She went on for a bit about Phil, the house in Jacksonville, and local politics, signing off with greetings to Edward. "Mom sends her love," I told Edward, who was sitting across the table from me, leafing through a copy of Rolling Stone.

He looked up. "How is she?"

"She's good. Phil's team is doing well." I clicked on an email from Charlie.

_Hi Bells_  
_Good to hear everything is okay. I was worried about the weather in Alaska but somebody said it's hot there in the summer just like anyplace else. I hope Edward is driving carefully. Well I know he usually does. Thanks for the pictures and the postcard. It looks like nice scenery up there. Hope you relax and have a good time because you worked hard at school, you'll probably be working hard in college, you deserve a break and some fun. Anyway Sue says to say hi and best wishes. Her girl Leah graduated this year and she's going to college in September. Also I was at Billy's and Rachel was visiting, and she said to say hello also. I guess you already email her all the time anyway, so you'll hear, but she's going to teach at the high school on the reserve. Her brother Jacob dropped out though, but Billy thinks he can talk him into going back and graduating. Too many kids around here drop out of school. Well have a good time and talk to you soon._  
_Love, Dad_

His message pleased me immensely, even though nobody would ever want to publish the Collected Letters of Charlie Swan. I paused to write a message on the back of the Law Enforcement Museum postcard I'd bought, addressed it to Charlie, and set it aside to mail on our way out. Then I opened Rachel Black's message.

_Hi Bella,_  
_I'm so happy to hear everything went well and that you're safely off on your honeymoon. Thanks for sending the wedding pictures; you looked beautiful in that blue dress. I hope you're having a wonderful time. _  
_I heard back from the rez school, and I'll start teaching there in the fall. I'm glad I can stay here, and be closer to Dad and Jacob. Dad's health is pretty stable at the moment. Jake's still going through a bad spell, though. He quit going to school in the spring, before the year ended, and isn't doing anything else. Well, he's kind of taken on the job of looking after the town. He and Leah are the only ones who are still regularly part of the old pack, if you know what I mean. Everybody else has settled back into normal life, but not Jacob. He does do some good, finding lost hikers and tracking down people the police are looking for, but Dad and I hoped for more of a life for him than just unpaid crime-fighter. We're hoping he'll snap out of it by September. _  
_Thanks for mentioning the Nobakov novel. I'll definitely look it up. Have you ever read Peter Carey's Oscar and Lucinda? I think you'd like it. _  
_All the best to you and Edward. _  
_Your friend, Rachel_

"Rachel also says hello," I reported. "She's staying on the reserve, teaching at the high school." I started composing a reply.

"Well done," he murmured. "Please give her my congratulations."

I added this message and hit Send. "Jacob's not doing so well, though. He's staying in wolf form, guarding the town like before, but not doing much of anything else, not even going to school. He was always a lot more depressed about the werewolf thing than most of them."

"I'm sorry to hear it. Jacob was a little belligerent toward us, but I suppose he had reason to be."

"Billy and Rachel are working on him. I assume Charlie is too. He's always had a soft spot for Jacob. The son he never had, I guess."

He smiled at me. "I'm sure he has no regrets in that area."

When clouds began to roll in at about one-thirty, we checked out and started driving back to the cabin. "Tanya's family asked if we'd like to come by after dinner," Edward told me. "They're planning a movie night. If you don't mind."

"Of course I don't mind. I like them."

"I'm glad," he said. "They like you too, by the way."

We got back just before the clouds moved on and the sun came out in force. It was warm enough for another swim in our miniature lake, followed by the inevitable aftermath to our swimming together naked. I cooked and ate dinner, Edward helped me with the few dishes, and we set out for the cousins' house.

"Where are your family staying while they're up here? I keep forgetting to ask."

"_Our_ family," he corrected with a smile. "A second house the Denali family own, just down the road from their current home. They only bought the property to prevent any neighbours from moving closer than a few miles away; but it's also useful as a guest house." I nodded. "May I ask you again what you were thinking about?"

"Thinking about? When?"

"Last night, while you were watching Tanya, Kate, and Irina. Your expression was very serious."

"Oh, right. I remember. It was nothing, really. Just flow of consciousness stuff."

"Even so, I'd love to hear you describe it." He looked at me encouragingly.

"Well...I was watching the sisters - you know."

"Do their impression of a fishing lure?"

I laughed. "Exactly. I was thinking, this way of, er, getting together is not that unusual. There were human couples in the bar, doing the same things, meeting and then leaving together. It made me think of how I felt about that, and that reminded me of the way I reacted in the shop earlier." I thought a moment. "I wondered if I was being judgmental, but I don't _think_ I am. It's not that I mind anybody going to that store, or picking up guys. I don't object, or look down on them, or anything. I just realized that it isn't for me." I looked at him. "I'm kind of boring in that department. I only want one guy - my husband. No other men; no equipment; not even dirty movies." He was grinning. "And...what works for me, _that_ way, is _you_; that you're with me, and that you love me, and I love you. It's the way I am, and I don't think I can change."

"I wouldn't want you to." He took my hand. "Do you remember, soon after we met, when I asked if you'd ever been with anyone?" I nodded. "I pointed out that love and lust don't always keep the same company; and you told me that for you, they did - at least, now that you had any experience with either."

"I remember."

"Then you'll also remember that I said it was one thing we had in common." He looked very pleased. "I'm the result of early twentieth century upbringing. There's no reason to expect we'd be in such perfect harmony on this subject, but we are." He laughed. "Esme's quite right: you're old fashioned, traditional through and through."

"About some things." I hesitated. "So...I don't need to worry about being more, er, adventurous?"

"Not for my sake, certainly. And please don't ever refer to yourself as _boring_ in this regard. You could not be more appealing, more endlessly alluring to me than you are. And, given my nature, that will never change." He said that last part casually, but I was struck by the truth of his statement. After my change, we would both be perpetually frozen in honeymoon mode. No gradual cooling of the marital ardor for us.

"Okay. But...if there is anything you'd like me to change, or to try, you'll tell me, right?"

"I promise. And you'll do the same?"

"Yes. Alice doesn't think I disapprove of her and Jasper going in that store, does she? I didn't, honestly; it was just seeing everything so _public_..."

"Things that ought to be completely private?"

"Exactly."

"Precisely the way I feel. No, they don't think that at all. Alice...well, she barely knows how to be embarrassed." I laughed, nodding in agreement. "And Jasper tends to view things in an objective, scholarly light. Most things, that is. But neither of them took offence at your reaction. They know you're naturally modest."

The Denali and the Cullens were together at the big cedar house when we arrived. Alice had described my flight from the sex shop, and Emmett teased me about it, and Kate and Rosalie joined in. They ignored Edward's interventions and my red face, but when Tanya said, "Enough. Leave the poor girl alone!" the joking stopped immediately. I shot Tanya a grateful look. The conversation moved on, splitting into multiple two- and three-person discussions, as before. I was getting a little better at coping with that.

The movie Tanya had referred to earlier was Amadeus. "I thought it would be good preparation for the opera this weekend," she explained as we gathered in the media room. "Especially for Bella, who'll be attending her very first opera. Have you seen the movie before, Bella?"

"Once, but I've always wanted to watch it again."

The most comfortable seat was set aside for me and Edward - which I didn't try to refuse, since it was only logical - and I was offered popcorn, which I turned down. The movie was even better than I'd remembered, and afterward everyone talked about Mozart and the opera we were going to see, moving on from there to reminisce about past performances they'd enjoyed in New York, in Paris, in Venice and Milan, and on one memorable occasion in Madison, Wisconsin. Carmen was asked to relate, for my benefit, the story of her brief encounter with Maria Callas outside a shoe store in Rome.

From there, the talk moved on to music, and to movies. The conversation continued as Edward, by general request, went to the piano and accompanied Eleazar on the violin. "What instrument would you like to play, Bella?" Tanya asked me at one point.

"Oh, I don't play anything. I've never had any aptitude for music."

"But that will change," she reminded me.

"Well...yeah, I guess it will."

She grinned at my surprise. "Pick an instrument. Make it a difficult one, if you want. You'll be able to master it. What's the hardest instrument to play? Do you know, Carmeneska?"

"I'm not sure," Carmen said.

I laughed. "I don't have to choose the hardest one, do I?"

"No, but you can take it into account," Tanya said. "It gives you more to brag about."

"The oboe is said to be difficult," Carmen said, "and the French horn."

"Didjeridoo," Emmett suggested.

"The theremin," Carlisle said. "Although there is very little reason to even try."

"I think Bella should choose an instrument because she likes it, not just because it's challenging," Irina said.

"I'll have to give it some thought."

We left at about eleven. It was still light outside, the sun close to the horizon, and we swam in our little lake once more before going to bed.


	11. Departure

Saturday morning, I finally remembered to take my book purchases out of the trunk and bring them into the cabin. "I bought something for you." I handed Edward the little book of poems.

He was delighted. "Bella, thank you! This is wonderful." He turned the first few pages. "I've always admired Neruda's love poetry."

"I thought so. You once quoted a line from him, when you were talking to me." I blushed slightly at the memory, and he bent and kissed me.

"Thank you, my love." He retrieved his wedding gift bookmark and placed it inside the book. "What else did you find at this bookstore?"

We spent a happy, quiet day together, Edward reading aloud to me from _The Professo_r and pausing between chapters to discuss. After lunch, we moved outside and sat beside the lake, the warm sun making rainbow lights dance off Edward's skin, and finished the next few chapters. Then we stripped down where we stood and plunged into the water together. Followed, of course, by the inevitable aftermath.

We dressed and left for Anchorage at about four o'clock, to leave time for dinner before the opera. "The restaurant is an important part of the complete date night experience," he explained, "and the regular date night is essential to a happy marital relationship."

I stared at him. "Have you been reading women's magazines?"

He laughed. "Yes, actually. I picked one up while waiting for you at a rest stop one day."

"You certainly seem to have taken it to heart," I teased.

"I'm always prepared to learn new things," he said blandly.

He took me into a very elegant Italian restaurant called La Vita Bella, dimly lit and filled with soft music, and asked for a quiet, secluded table. We were seated at a corner table partially shielded by a decorative screen; it could hardly have been more private. "This is very...what's a better word than fancy?"

"Ostentatious?" he suggested with a grin.

"I didn't mean _that_! It's...opulent."

"Appropriate for opera night. And we're not likely to be any better dressed than we are now, during this trip."

"True." I looked him over. Edward in a perfectly fitting suit and tie was a feast for the eyes.

"And it's yet another restaurant with Bella in its name." I smiled as we both recalled what might be considered our first date, at Bella Italia in Port Angeles.

We were handed menus by a waiter - not a waitress this time, so there was no stunned pause to take in Edward's appearance. He gave me a little smile, and Edward turned a slightly hostile look on his retreating back.

"What did that poor waiter do to you?" I asked, surprised.

"Never mind." I looked at him. "He was taking far too much notice of you, that's all. He didn't intend to be offensive; I suppose I shouldn't blame him if his mind wanders. You do look exceptionally dazzling in that dress."

"The dazzle is mutual, Mr. Cullen," I told him, giving him a little smile. He leaned over the table to kiss me.

We skipped appetizers and each ordered entrees, knowing I would have to eat both. We flirted and laughed and otherwise acted very much like a couple on date night.

"Would you consider acting the part of the autocratic Victorian husband, just for a few minutes?"

He looked bemused. "I'd be happy to try, if you like. How can this overbearing husband be of service?"

"Tell me what kind of musical instrument I should learn to play."

"Ah. Why should I tell you? Don't you have a preference?"

"Not a strong one. I like music, and I'd like to eventually learn to play a lot of instruments. I'd be able to do that, right? After, I mean?"

He smiled. "You will, if you have the interest."

"I can't seem to choose just one to start with. I thought I'd put it in your hands; you know a lot more about music than I do. Is there an instrument you'd like to have me play, for any reason?"

He thought a moment. "I rather like the idea of you taking up the violin. Partly because the image is aesthetically pleasing; and partly because there is a fair amount of music written for piano and violin. We could play together. It's also adaptable to many types of music."

"Good. That's what I'll do, then. And later on, maybe you could teach me the piano?"

"It would be my very great pleasure." He fed me a bite of his Tournedos Bolognese. "I take it the need for a despotic husband is at an end, and I can return to the role of enlightened, egalitarian life partner?"

I giggled. "Yes, you can."

"Good. I find I prefer that."

"Really?" I teased. "You don't enjoy bossing me around?"

"Not at all. Except, of course, in the most intimate of situations." He met my eyes. "But I believe you find it acceptable under those circumstances as well."

I swallowed. "Yes," I said faintly. "I do." Our eyes remained locked until the busboy came to refill our water glasses, and I managed to look away.

I'd noticed something while we gazed at each other. "Your eyes are getting dark."

"I know. I intend to hunt in the next day or two. Jasper was going to go along. Maybe you could spend some time with Alice."

I nodded. "That would be nice."

We finished 'our' meal, refused dessert or coffee, and Edward requested the bill. "Good timing," he observed as we left the restaurant. "We can reach the concert hall without rushing."

The hall was a large, modern building, simple but striking on the outside, the interior beautiful but restrained. Our group were gathering in the lobby when we arrived; they stood talking quietly, seemingly oblivious to the fact that they were the most beautiful people in the room. Also the best dressed, without looking remotely overdressed or - that word again - ostentatious. Greetings were exchanged, and Esme began filling me in on the opera itself and what to expect.

"Bella," Alice broke in, "we should make a visit to the ladies' room."

"_We_ should?" I asked in surprise.

"I need to fix your hair."

I rolled my eyes but followed her willingly enough. She sat me down in the ladies' lounge and deftly twisted my hair and pinned it up on the back of my head. "There. Take a look." I stood up and peered into the mirror. "Very elegant, don't you think?"

"Yes. Appropriate for an opera, right?"

"Exactly."

"Your hair looks pretty," I observed. The spikes had been replaced by soft waves.

"Thank you. A change is nice, once in a while." We returned to the lobby, where everyone was ready to go in and find their seats.

We had very good orchestra seats in spite of the short notice, distributed over three rows. I sat in a row where we had three seats, between Edward and Kate. I read the programme avidly before the performance started, and thanks to _Amadeus,_ and Edward and Kate alternately whispering explanations in my ear as needed, the show made sense to me even without being able to understand the words. I liked the music, though, and told Edward so during the intermission.

"I can't say I love it, because I don't quite get it yet, but I think I will eventually."

"Always an exciting process," Edward said, smiling at my enthusiasm.

At my request, Esme took a picture of Edward and me standing in the lobby, and we returned for the second act.

We emerged from the concert hall at 11:30, just as it was starting to get dark. Several members of the group were prepared to go home at that point, but Rosalie spotted a marquee over a nearby bar advertising their band for the weekend. "Look who's playing! I just love them!"

I was surprised. "Hey! I have their first CD. They're great." I looked at Edward. "Can we go in?"

"From Mozart to this?" he quipped. "Of course. Let's go."

We were in time to hear the last set. I applauded wildly with everyone else. Edward moved toward the stage at one point, returning with a copy of the band's new CD, signed by the lead guitarist. "Thanks!" I hugged him.

"Ready to go home?"

"Definitely. I'm not used to these late nights." I said goodnight to the others and walked off with Edward to the lot where our car was parked.

"Where did the others park?" I asked, looking back at our eleven companions, who seemed to be walking off into a public park.

"They didn't. They all ran here. It's much faster than driving. They only take cars when there's a practical reason, or in order to keep up appearances. As long as no one spots them coming out of the forest in evening clothes, they're fine."

I thought this over. "I suppose they carry their shoes," I mused. "And the women must fix their hair after they arrive."

"Straight to the practical details," he said, smiling. He opened the car door for me, bending to kiss me before closing it again and taking the wheel. I fell asleep on the way, and woke briefly to find myself being carried through the cabin door and into the bedroom.

We fell into a routine of nights and mornings to ourselves, and most afternoons with the Cullens and their hosts. We went back to Anchorage twice more, for more informal concerts, and on other days just hung out. Edward made his hunting trip, which all the males decided to join, leaving me with a day-long all-female gathering that turned out to be quite enjoyable. The days passed, until one day I realized it was almost three weeks into the month of July.

"When do we need to be getting back?" I asked Edward. We were in the home of what I'd learned to call Tanya's family, inside the sun porch/sewing room/office, and Edward was watching as Tanya and Rosalie did the final alterations on a blouse they'd insisted on making for me. I took off the pinned garment and pulled my own top back on, and Tanya opened the sunroom door.

"I was going to talk to you about that this evening. We're expected in Hanover before the semester begins. We also have the cabin only until the end of the month, but we could easily find another place if you want to stay longer."

"Maybe we should go ahead and move on to New Hampshire. It's the expected thing."

"True, Bella still has human family and friends," Tanya observed, "who will notice if she diverges too much from routine."

"If you think so," Edward said to me, "we can leave any day this week."

"You're not driving all the way to New Hampshire, are you?" Kate asked from the doorway.

"Our tentative plan was to drive back to Anchorage and take a plane from there."

"Why drive back?" Irina said, joining Kate. "Catch a plane from here. There are several small airports in the immediate area that travel to and from Anchorage. Air travel is kind of an essential in the far north. For that matter, you can probably travel even further, and skip the stopover. Arctic Airlines has flights from the local airport to Edmonton, I know for a fact."

"That would be more convenient," Edward agreed, "but we have to return the rental car. There's no branch closer than Anchorage."

Esme joined in. "We can take your car back when we catch our flight from Anchorage, Edward."

"If you don't mind..." He looked at me, and I nodded. "Thank you, Esme."

We arranged a flight for Thursday. The Denali threw us a farewell party of sorts, and we spoke of seeing each other again soon. Tanya hugged me robustly as we left. "I'm so happy you're part of the family now, Bella."

"So am I." I grinned at her. "Thank you all for the welcome."

We drove home and packed up our cabin in preparation for the next morning's departure. I sent a short email to Charlie and one to Mom, updating them and forwarding the rest of my photographs, and telling them about tomorrow's departure for New Hampshire. Then Edward and I took one more swim in our little lake under the late-night sunny skies. Later, as i lay drowsily in Edward's arms, I said, "I don't believe anyone ever had a better honeymoon than ours."

He chuckled. "No one ever has, love. We'll go on trips together in the future that are more outwardly impressive, perhaps; more..."

"...ostentatious?" I put in.

He laughed. "Possibly. But I find it hard to imagine a happier one."

"Who needs Paris? We'll always have Smithers," I said, making him laugh.

I woke on my own at eight. I ate breakfast while Edward phoned the cabin's owner to let him know we were vacating, and confirmed our eleven thirty flight. We packed up the car and drove to the small local airport, parking and leaving the keys in the glove compartment as arranged, so the Cullens could pick it up. We went through minimal security procedures and found seats in the equally minimal airport lounge to begin the unavoidable process of waiting for our flight.

Edward's phone chirped while we were waiting. He looked at it. "A message from Dartmouth, confirming my appointment with my course advisor. You'll probably have an email waiting for you." He looked out the window onto the tarmac. "It looks like they're taking our plane back to the hangar."

I looked outside, watching the aircraft being wheeled slowly away, then inexplicably returned to its original place on the airfield. "Somebody hijacked it to the far end of the runway." He snickered.

The phone sounded again a moment later. "Another memo from Dartmouth."

"Can you turn it off?"

"I suppose so. I'll be asked to turn it off once we board, anyway." He hesitated, then switched the device off and put it in his pocket.

We boarded the smallest airplane I'd ever been in, with seating for thirty or forty. There was no jetway leading from the airport; we walked across the tarmac and climbed a set of portable stairs into the plane. We were placed in the eight person First Class section, which was empty except for ourselves and a preoccupied looking man of about fifty, wearing a track suit, who scribbled in a notebook more or less continually. "Is he a businessman?" I asked Edward.

"No, a fairly successful science fiction writer."

"Really? What's his name?"

He looked carefully at the other passenger. I had the impression he was reading the man's name from the notebook cover. "John Morley."

"What? John _Gerald_ Morley?" I snuck a peek at him.

"I don't know his middle name. Why?"

"J. G. Morley. He's kind of famous. I wonder if he lives in Alaska."

"I'm not familiar with his work. Do you want to ask for his autograph?"

I looked over at the man, who was still writing away furiously. "No. I don't think he wants to be disturbed."

I clung to Edward's hand nervously during takeoff. "Sorry. I'm used to flying, but not on anything this small. It seems so much higher, somehow." I peered down at the ground below.

"Would you like to move away from the window?"

"No, I'm fine now we're up." I settled in comfortably for our three hour flight. The flight attendant stood in the aisle for the usual in-flight safety demonstration. She explained how to fasten and unfasten seat belts, how to use the oxygen masks if necessary, how to respond to an emergency landing both on land and water, and where the exits could be found. "And please exit in an orderly fashion," I added in a whisper to Edward, glancing around at our nearly empty seats, "to avoid having passengers trampled by the crowd."

He chuckled. "I've never had this degree of privacy on a commercial flight. It's quite nice."

"I like it." The small plane lacked amenities, like movies and free headphones for listening to satellite radio, but it did include a meal. Once cruising altitude had been reached, we were provided with lunch. I ate my favourite parts of the prepackaged meal, and their duplicates from Edward's tray, and left the rest. The trays were collected, and I settled back, holding Edward's hand and watching the forests and lakes far below.

"Tell me about this writer, J. G. Morley," Edward said. "Are you a fan?"

"I'm not that fond of science fiction, generally, but I like his stuff. It's unusual. He normally includes a love story as part of his plot."

"A love story? As between earthlings and aliens?"

"No, it's not that kind of sci fi. He writes a lot of things about fate and chance and how they affect people's lives. He has this very funny story about a couple whose on-and-off relationship is a metaphor for the attraction between sub-nuclear particles."

"That does sound unusual."

"There's a kind of dark one about a person who naturally attracts danger."

"Something we've observed in real life," he said wryly.

Edward took his phone out of his pocket and switched it back on, checking a text message as he spoke to me. He broke off abruptly in the middle of a sentence and stared intently at the screen. He cursed under his breath.

"Edward? What's wrong?"

"Just a moment. I have to speak with Alice." He touched a button, then swore softly again when he couldn't get through. He tapped out a short text message and hit Send.

"Edward?"

"Please, love, let me hear from Alice before I say anything." I nodded, uneasy. He looked as if he were panicking but trying to appear calm for my sake. He hid it very well, but somehow I could tell. The quiet ping of an incoming message sounded, and he scanned the screen again. There was some more back and forth, then he replaced the phone in his pocket and stood up. "Bella, I have to check on something. One minute." He strode down the aisle. I turned to watch him, wondering what was up. He seemed to be headed for the toilet cubicle at one end of the first class section.

After about five minutes, he returned to his seat without looking at me or acknowledging me, which was uncharacteristic enough to worry me. He took out his phone and sent a brief text, almost immediately receiving an answer and sending another message in reply. He put the phone away again and sat stock still, staring intently at the blank bulkhead in front of him.

"Edward, you have to tell me what's going on!" I insisted.

He roused himself. "Yes, I know. I'm sorry, love. I'll tell you, but...I have to ask you to do your best to remain calm. Don't react audibly to anything I say. Can you do that?"

Now i was concerned. "Yes, I can do that. What is it, Edward."

He placed an arm around me, leaning close to my ear. "Alice contacted me. She saw the plane...getting into trouble."

"Trouble? You mean like engine trouble?" I whispered.

"Exactly."

"How bad?" His face was grim. "Really bad? You mean the plane _crashes_?"

"That's what she's seeing. I've been trying to read the pilot's thoughts. He's just become aware of a glitch. I was hoping it was pilot error. At worst, I could take over and fly the plane myself."

"But it's not pilot error?"

"No. Alice can foresee the investigation into the crash. It was mechanical failure. There's very little I can do about that."

"The passengers...?"

"According to Alice, there will be no survivors." He seemed to be concentrating intently.

I nodded, remaining calm as promised. "All right." I wondered how much time we had. I held his hand tightly. Edward would, of course, survive the accident. Was there anything I could say that would make this easier for him? That would help him cope with my death? I had to at least try. "Edward, listen to me, please. You have to promise me you'll be all right, after. Let your family help you. Find a way to be happy again. _Please_, Edward. You're..."

Edward's head snapped back to face me. He seemed to finally take in what I was saying, and interrupted me. "Bella, I'm so sorry. I seem to have given you the wrong impression. _You_ are not going to die in this crash."

"But...but you said..." I lowered my voice to a whisper. "Alice said no survivors."

"That will be the official report, but I have no intention of letting you go down with this plane."

"But what can you do?"

"If flying the plane is not an option, I'll try and determine if anything can be done to stabilize the engines from inside the plane. Unlikely, but I'll try. However, if the plane is going down, we may have to bail out together."

"With a parachute, you mean?" I wasn't aware of any parachutes being supplied to passengers, not even in first class.

"No." He reminded me with a gesture to remain calm, and I nodded. "If necessary, I'll wait until the plane is close to the ground, get a good grip on you, kick out the exit door, and jump."

"I see." I thought about that a moment. I thought I should be having a stronger reaction to his explanation. "What about all the other passengers?"

"There's nothing I can do for them. I'm sorry."

I looked back at the doorway leading to Coach and its thirty-odd passengers, and at the unworried face of J. G. Morley, engrossed in taking notes for a work of fiction that would never be written. "Okay," I whispered, feeling helpless.

"It's _not_ okay, sweetheart, and I realize that; but it may be unavoidable."

"Is there anything I can do?"

"At the moment, just stay calm, and let me monitor the situation as well as I can."

I sat quietly, letting my mind go blank, while Edward stared fixedly into the distance. He became instantly normal and cheerful when the flight attendant came by and offered us a beverage. I declined, but Edward asked for a glass of orange juice. When she brought it, he asked me to drink it, which I did. He stayed quiet a few more minutes, then sat back with a sigh.

"Bella, you should use the restroom now, if you don't mind." That seemed like an odd request, but perhaps he saw the facilities becoming unavailable shortly. I walked back to the cubicle for a human minute, then washed my hands and, for some reason, tied my hair back. I returned to the seat. The flight attendant seemed to be returning from the cockpit, and she looked shaken under her professional calm. I turned to Edward.

"It's starting," he said quietly. "The pilot is trying to deal with the problem. He probably won't make an announcement until it's unavoidable." I nodded, trying to brace myself for what was coming. My heart was speeding up. "Bella." He waited until I looked directly at him. "I have to ask you, at this point, to let me take control of the situation."

"What do you mean?"

"Until we're safely out of the plane, I need you to do what I ask, without hesitation. Even if it seems pointless, please, just follow my instructions immediately and to the letter. Can you do that, please?"

"Yes. Sure I can." I nodded. I kept nodding for longer than was really called for, and made myself stop.

"I know you're frightened, love, but it will be all right."

"Okay." My concern for the other passengers was being swallowed up by my own panic. I did my best to suppress both, to just focus on Edward. There was nothing I could do, I reminded myself.

"Bella, is there anything in your carry-on luggage that's particularly important to you? Any jewelry, keepsakes?"

"Um, no. I don't think so." I was wearing my wedding band and engagement ring. The only other real jewelry I had, gifts from Edward, had been packed for shipment to Hanover.

"What about in your purse?" I dutifully looked through my purse. "You should leave your wallet. They may be able to identify your ID or credit cards." This didn't really sink in, but I nodded again. I watched as Edward removed most of the cash from my wallet and pocketed it. He removed a few photographs and put those into his pocket as well.

He stood and took two blankets down from the overhead storage bin, laying them down on the seat beside me. As I watched, he took down his own bag, retrieved the little poetry book I'd given him, and tucked it carefully in his shirt pocket, buttoning the placket to hold it in place. He unpacked a jacket, put it on and zipped it up. Then he took down my carry-on bag and removed a jacket of mine. "Put this on, please," he said, holding it for me. I slipped my arms into the sleeves and did up the buttons. He sat back down, putting an arm around me and pulling me tightly against him.

He took out his phone and typed a brief message. I could see the screen; it read '_Time?_' A few seconds later, the reply came back. '_9 minutes. All well. I C her OK_.' Edward typed in, '_Thx. Call U after_.' He put away the phone once more.

"Nine minutes?"

"Yes." He was studying the nearest exit door closely. "When the time comes, I'm going to wrap both these blankets around you. I'll ask you to hold your arms against your body, like this." He demonstrated, crossing both arms over his chest. "Press your head against my shoulder, and try not to struggle. I'm going to hold you very tightly. Understand?"

"Yes."

"I love you, Bella."

"I love you," I whispered.

We sat together, holding each other and waiting for what we knew was coming. The plane began to lurch, and the pilot's voice came over the loudspeaker warning of turbulence, and requesting all passengers fasten their safety belts. We followed his instructions, but Edward unfastened them again as soon as the flight attendant had walked by. The turbulence became worse. At last the pilot, in a deceptively calm voice, made the awaited announcement. I could hear sounds of alarm from the passengers in Coach, and the First Class flight attendant, seeing we were remaining in our seats, hurried back to help. She didn't return, likely more needed there than up front with her three charges.

I looked over at Mr. Morley. He paused, his pen poised over his notebook a moment, then sighed and put the notebook away. I had a brief, irrational feeling of regret that he'd never be able to finish his story. It was probably my mind trying to distract itself. I decided this was not such a bad thing.

As the plane began to shudder and make periodic drops in altitude, the pilot spoke once more, rapidly, saying he would try an emergency landing into one of the lakes below, and asking passengers to stay in their seats with their belts fastened. I tried to let my mind go blank, and largely succeeded.

It suddenly became quiet, as the sound of the engines simply stopped. This was followed by a sensation of dropping, slowly at first, then more rapidly, the plane righting itself once or twice before tilting lazily forward and plummeting downward nose first, gaining speed as it went. Edward held me in place, and I braced my feet against the back of the seat in front of me, which was now horizontal. I could hear screaming as if from a great distance, and my scattered thoughts went out to the terrified people. Mr. Morley sat still and quiet, his eyes tightly closed.

Edward sat, unmoving but alert, watching intently out the window of the plane, apparently waiting for the right moment. I focused on breathing in and out, trusting Edward with all my might. He suddenly stood. He wrapped one blanket around my shoulders, forming a hood over my head and tying the corners over my chest. The second blanket he wrapped around my legs, tying it in the same way, turning me into a firmly packed bundle. He picked me up, adjusting my position carefully, placing one arm under the crook of my neck, making sure my back was fully supported. "Stay in this exact position," he told me. "I don't want you to be injured by the impact when we land." I nodded, looking up at him. "It's okay, Bella. I've got you." I nodded again, and pressed my face against him. Holding me tightly, he kicked the exit door until it swung open, hanging on its damaged hinges, admitting a shock of cool air. The wind rushed past the opening, making a loud roar.

Edward stood poised beside the shattered door, waiting as the plane came closer and closer to impact. When I was sure he'd be too late and we'd hit the ground before he acted, he suddenly sprang through the doorway. I closed my eyes, bracing myself against the sickening sensation of falling, more intense now than from inside the plane. We fell for several seconds, then I felt a jolt as Edward landed lightly on the ground. I opened my eyes cautiously. I had a vague idea we were out in the countryside; there were trees, fields, a narrow river. Edward immediately began running, still holding me tightly in his arms, until we'd covered a considerable distance. He stopped, and seconds later the ground shook slightly and a shockingly loud noise broke the stillness. Edward still held me, shielding me from the sight, but I could see over his shoulder the barely recognizable wreckage of the plane. It hadn't gone down into water after all; it had shot directly into the ground like an arrow, collapsing onto itself from the force. Pieces of the plane's exterior, thrown through the air by the impact, were still falling when a dull explosion was heard from inside the plane. Fire appeared through a crack in the wreckage. A minute later, the entire plane was engulfed in flames.

* * *

_**As I'm sure everyone is aware, the plane disaster was derived from a line in Eclipse, in which Bella asks Edward what he would have done if her plane to Florida had crashed. He says he would get a good grip on her, kick out the door, and jump. I thought I'd give him the opportunity.**_


	12. Post Mortem

Edward paused a moment, looking intently at the burning wreck, still holding me tightly in his arms, then turned away and ran once again, not stopping until all I could see of the plane was a distant plume of black smoke rising into the air. I stared at it, feeling dizzy.

"Breathe, Bella," Edward said. I nodded, but didn't really take in his words. "Bella." He gently turned my face toward him. "Breathe, love."

I drew in air, gasping at first, then slowing down. The dizziness passed, but now I felt nauseous. I started struggling to get down from his arms. "Edward, let me go. I'm going to be sick." He set me gently on my feet, unwrapping the airline blankets quickly. I staggered a few yards away from him and fell to my knees, retching. It was over in a few seconds. I threw dirt and leaves over the vomit, and turned to find Edward offering me a bottle of drinking water. I rinsed my mouth, then took a few gulps, and felt a little more stable. I started to get to my feet, and he took my hand and helped me up. He seemed to study me closely. "I'm all right," I told him.

"Are you sure? Do you have any back or neck pain? Joint pain?"

"No, no." The landing had been surprisingly gentle. "I'm just kind of..." I gestured helplessly in the direction of the drifting smoke.

"I understand."

"You're sure there were no survivors? Alice might have been wrong. Maybe..."

He shook his head. "I stopped a moment before leaving the area. There were no discernible thoughts, not even the faint ones that come from someone unconscious, and no heartbeats. I'm afraid they all died on impact." I nodded again. "You should sit down." He led me to a fallen log, spread one of the blankets over it, and urged me onto it. I sank down gratefully.

"I'm going to phone Carlisle," he said, taking out his cell. "They'll be waiting to hear from us."

"Okay."

He remained close, watching me, as he hit a key. "Carlisle? Yes, Bella is all right, thank God; but the plane went down just as Alice saw. No other survivors." He listened briefly. "I picked her up and jumped from an exit door at the last moment," he explained into the phone. Another pause to listen. "No, I left those in the overhead luggage compartment. The plane went up in flames anyway. I don't think there will be any gaps. Alice should know before long, either way." I wasn't sure what he was talking about, but didn't want to interrupt. "She's in a state of shock, but coming around quickly," he went on. Then, after a much longer pause, "No, you're right. You should both be there to take calls. I'll stay nearby until they arrive. Thank you, Carlisle." He snapped the phone shut and turned back to me, sitting down beside me on the tree trunk.

I tried to sort through the questions in my mind. "Who's arriving?"

"Alice, Jasper, Rosalie, and Emmett. Carlisle and Esme are staying in Alaska. We assume they will be receiving phone calls shortly, about the crash."

There was some significance to this that I wasn't quite grasping, but at least I was clear on who was coming. "Where are we?"

"It's a small provincial park in north-eastern British Columbia. We're about forty miles from the crash site."

"Okay." I thought again. "Will they be able to find us?"

"Yes."

"Why are they coming here?"

"To accompany us home. That is, back to Alaska."

"Okay." I looked up at him. "Sorry, I don't seem to be thinking very clearly."

"That's quite understandable. You don't have to think about it right now, Bella. You're safe; we'll get you back to the house, and when you feel up to it, we'll talk. For now, don't worry."

"All right." He handed me the bottled water again, along with some peanut butter cookies wrapped in cellophane. "Did you swipe these from the plane?"

"I did." I set the cookies aside, but he picked up the package and handed it to me again. "You should try to eat them, Bella. A little sugar will help with the shock."

"Right. I remember." He'd had to monitor me for signs of shock before. I slowly ate the cookies, and drank the water. I started feeling much better. "That helped, I think."

"Good." He put an arm around me, and I leaned against him, grateful that he was there; glad that I was alive to be there with him; horrified by the deaths of that plane full of people. Tears started to slide down my cheeks, and he gently dried them. "All those people!" I sobbed. I wept for what seemed like a long time.

The others arrived in just over two hours. Alice immediately ran up and hugged me. "I'm s_o_ glad you're all right!"

"Thanks, Alice." I hugged her back as hard as I could.

"Close call," Emmett said, giving me a squeeze around the shoulders. "Quick thinking, little brother."

"I'm glad you're safe," Rosalie said, "but Edward was right: Bella's some kind of magnet for danger. Honestly, what are the chances of a plane crashing and leaving no survivors? One in several million, at least? But Bella beat the odds." I shrugged apologetically, and she laughed. "I wasn't blaming you, Bella. It's just uncanny, that's all."

"So what's the plan?" Emmett asked. "Run back directly?"

"That seems best," Jasper said. "Bella will need food and shelter before long, and neither of you can be seen going into a hotel." I considered asking why not, but decided to stick with Edward's proposed plan of not thinking about it for now.

"I don't know that she's up to riding on my back at the moment," Edward said. "Can we run a little more slowly, so I can carry her?"

Everyone assented. Alice had brought along a knitted cap, explaining that it would keep the wind from whistling in my ears as we travelled. Rosalie rolled up the two blankets and tucked them under her arm, and Edward took me up and cradled me in his arms again. "We're going to run through woods and parkland as much as possible," he explained, "in order to stay out of sight. If you need to stop for any reason, just say the word. Otherwise, we'll run all the way to the house in Denali."

I agreed, and they all started to run, darting like lightning through the trees. I remembered to close my eyes. After an hour or so, I asked Edward for a rest stop. They ran through a park close to a campground and pointed me to a public washroom beside a hiking trail. "Don't let yourself be seen by anyone," Edward warned.

"Why?"

"Because you were thought to be killed in the plane crash," he explained patiently. "Your picture might appear on the news. It would be a problem if you were seen alive and well a hundred miles away."

"Oh. Sure." I took a human minute, washed my hands and face, and straightened my hair as best I could with my fingers. I stretched out my arms and legs as I walked back to the others.

"Take a few minutes to walk, Bella," Edward said. "You must be a little stiff." I walked along beside them for five minutes or so, until I had loosened up.

"Okay. We can go on. But Edward, I can ride on your back if it's easier. I'm fine now."

"If you're sure." I nodded, and he gently swung me up, waiting until I had my arms and legs wrapped around him before starting off. I looked around, seeing the other four moving along beside him at the same astonishing speed, showing no sign of making any effort. I hid my face against Edward's shoulder; that always made the speed easier to take. I took only two more short breaks before we reached the house in Alaska.

Tanya came to greet us at the door. "Edward, Bella! I didn't expect to see you again _this_ soon," she said wryly. "Are you all right, little cousin?"

"I'm fine."

"She's just a little shook up," Emmett said.

"Of course." Esme took my hand. "You feel cold, dear."

"Facing a rushing wind for three hours can have that effect," Rosalie said.

"Come on, Bella," Tanya said. "You need a hot shower."

I was taken to one of the upstairs bathrooms. I stood under the spray until my muscles relaxed and I felt warm again. When I stepped out, Edward was waiting there. He handed me a towel. "Irina brought you some clean clothes. She's the closest to your size." I dried myself and put on the jeans and pale blue polo shirt left for me. "We're talking over the situation," Edward told me. "We'd like you to join us, if you feel up to it."

We went downstairs, where both families were gathered, talking quietly. Edward and I sat down together. "We're just trying to clarify our plans," Carlisle explained. "The crash has been reported since some thirty minutes after it occurred. They've been withholding names of the deceased until their next of kin have been notified."

"Oh!" I said, "How could I not think of it before? I have to contact my parents, let them know I'm okay!"

There was a heavy silence. I noticed several of them exchange looks. Emmett gazed uneasily at the ceiling. "What did I say?" I asked meekly.

Edward finally spoke. "Bella, love, you have to understand that you can't contact your parents, not any more. And we certainly can't let them know that you're alive."

"You and Edward are known to have boarded that plane, Bella," Carlisle said. "Multiple security scans confirm it. There is no plausible way you both could have escaped alive."

"But my mom, and Charlie, they'll..."

"Yes. Your father has already telephoned us. He was hoping there might have been some mistake, that you'd missed your flight. We had to tell him that you and Edward had taken the flight, and had been killed in the crash. He said he was going to telephone your mother and let her know, assuming she hasn't already been contacted by the authorities."

I shook my head, horrified. "They must be..."

"Your father seemed very distraught," Carlisle admitted, "as is only natural. I'm terribly sorry, Bella, but we have to let your parents believe the official story."

I was shaking my head, unable to accept this plan, but at a loss to know how I could dispute it.

"Sorry if I'm being callous," Rosalie put in, "but Bella, didn't you plan on doing this before long anyway?" I looked at her in surprise. "Not a plane crash, that is; but having your family think you'd died or disappeared? You'd have to do it anyway, before you were changed, right? This accident just took care of it for you."

Her words shocked me a little, not because they were callous, but because they made me realize that I'd been hiding this from myself. I'd swept it under the rug, assuming that the Cullens would come up with a way to change me and have me cut off all human ties, without hurting any of the people I loved. Obviously, that was ridiculous. I realized now how silly and thoughtless I'd been. "Rosalie is right, of course," I said. "If the plane hadn't crashed, I would have had to pretend to die some other way in the next few weeks, or else disappear, which would probably be worse for my parents. Of course, I know I can't tell them I'm alive."

Several cold hands patted me, rubbed my back soothingly. "I know it must be hard, knowing they're grieving for you," Esme said. "I'm so sorry, Bella."

"No, _I'm_ sorry. I've been in denial, I guess. I put off thinking about it, figuring you'd all come up with some perfect solution that would let me vanish without upsetting anyone. It wasn't possible. I don't know what I was thinking."

I was stroked and patted further. "I'm afraid the days to come will be hard on you, Bella," Carlisle said. "The plane crash will be in the news frequently. Your parents will have to hold a funeral for you and mourn your loss. We will probably join them." He looked around the table.

"I think it would be expected," Esme agreed. "Since Forks was the last place we lived, I suppose we should hold Edward's funeral there as well."

"That seems reasonable."

"I think," Edward said, "that it might be helpful to have a joint funeral and joint burial. It would save Charlie trouble and worry, not to mention expense. I assume I have ample life insurance to cover any funeral costs - or can produce some on short notice?"

"Sure, I'll take care of it," Emmett said.

"Thank you," I said. "Charlie kind of goes to pieces when it comes to arranging things like that. It would be a big help if you could take it out of his hands."

"We'll be very glad to do that," Esme assured me.

It was finally agreed that the entire family, minus their deceased newlyweds, would return to Forks and arrange a funeral and a burial plot for the unfortunate couple. It was a little strange that I wasn't as worried about my mom. She would be more heartbroken than I could bear to think about, but she would cry, grieve, and let it out, and finally get over it. Charlie would hold it all in and brood for months on end. I was relieved that he had Sue now; she would help him through it better than anyone could.

"After the funeral," Carlisle said, "I think Esme and I should stay on for at least a few days. We'd be expected to sort through belongings and take care of loose ends - and we could be on hand for Charlie, if he needed help of any kind. The others should probably go on ahead to New Hampshire."

"What should Edward and I do?" I asked. "I don't suppose we come with you to Forks."

"Not unless you want to do a Tom Sawyer," Kate said, "and attend your own funerals."

"I definitely don't. But where _are_ we supposed to be?"

"You and Edward are thought to be dead," Eleazar said, "so you will have to remain in hiding, at least from anyone who might remember you."

"Our property in New Hampshire is fairly isolated," Esme said.

"If I might make a suggestion," Eleazar began. Carlisle nodded. "We have a large house in an extremely secluded location. Would this not be the ideal place for Bella to go through her transformation, and her newborn period?"

Tanya clapped her hands excitedly. "Yes, it would be perfect! Bella would have two families to help her when she is new, rather than just one. The human population here is sparse, and the hunting excellent."

"That is very kind of you," Carlisle said.

"Not at all," Tanya told him.

Carlisle looked around. "Any thoughts?"

"It does seem like a great place for a newborn vampire," Emmett agreed. "A lot harder to get into real trouble."

Jasper nodded thoughtfully. "One problem, of course, is that we already have commitments in New Hampshire."

"True," Edward said. "Normally we could cancel those and move on, but this time, we have contacts from Washington who may take notice of our movements."

Carlisle nodded. "Yes. They'd find it odd if all four of our children simultaneously withdrew from college, while I resigned my hospital position at the same time, and we all either disappeared or moved inexplicably to Alaska."

"Too bad you didn't apply to the University of Alaska instead," I commented, ducking my head as I realized it was a pointless digression. Alice gave me a smile.

"Well, consider it," Tanya said. "It's good to have options."

"We will," Carlisle told her. "Thank you, Tanya."

Two more phone calls came from Charlie. I could only hear Carlisle's end of the conversation, but it still broke my heart. The next day, the six officially living Cullens and all their Alaskan cousins took a plane from Anchorage to Seattle and drove to Forks to help arrange a double funeral.

Alice described it to me after they came back. "They had a lovely funeral in the same church where you were married, and Rev. Hughes gave a beautiful eulogy; and your graves are side by side under a willow tree, with simple granite headstones." Empty graves, I understood, since there was nothing left of the plane's passengers but ashes.

"But how were my parents doing?"

"Well, your mother was crying quite a bit, and Charlie was a little out of it; they let Carlisle and Esme take care of all the arrangements. Charlie's friend Sue seemed to know how to help him."

"Yeah, I'm glad she's there for him."

"Your mother's husband is good for her, too." I nodded.

"Some of your father's friends from the Quileute reserve attended," Esme added as she passed through the room.

"Oh, yes," Alice said. "They seemed very angry with us. I suppose they knew what was going on, or thought they did. And all your friends from school were there, too."

News reports continued to trickle in concerning the crash. An airport administrator was taking heat for persistently lax safety precautions, and would probably be fired.

All the Cullens returned to Alaska for the time being, and Edward and I were given a room in the guest house. I didn't realize at first that they were waiting for me to express a preference: would I be changed here, or at the new Cullen house in New Hampshire? But I wasn't in any condition to decide.

I was in a bad way for a while after the funeral. My thoughts kept bouncing around like pinballs in a machine, running into things and veering away from them. I couldn't stand the way I'd caused my parents so much grief. How could I have done this to them? I did it, I answered myself, because I was selfish. I wanted to be with Edward, and didn't care who I hurt in the process. I felt unbearably guilty.

Both families were aware that I was despondent and agitated, and that made me feel even more guilty, so I did everything I could to appear normal and unconcerned. My thoughts circled around and around in a gloomy spiral, day after day. Edward was kind and loving and solicitous; and since I appeared to want only to be alone with my thoughts, he let me be. I felt terrible that I was making him feel so bad, and so useless. I couldn't find a way to tell him how I felt without hurting his feelings, so I made every effort to appear normal for him, too. I knew he would be finding a way to blame himself for all this. There was very little real conversation between us, and no physical affection at all.

About ten days after the funeral, at the end of another long day of hating myself and making polite non-conversation and acting like everything was perfectly fine, Jasper approached me and asked if he could speak with me. The request was so formal and serious, I assumed it was something vital. He indicated a chair near the fireplace, and took a seat across from me. "I'll ask you, first, to hear me out. Some of what I say may be unpleasant, but this is for the good of the family."

"All right," I answered cautiously. I could see the others tuning in from various parts of the house.

"Your grief is understandable. Given the way you tend to feel responsible for the happiness of others, so is your guilt. I can very literally say that I know how you feel," he smiled faintly, "and your feelings are natural. But it has to stop." I blinked, slightly surprised by his directness. Everyone had been walking on eggs around me since the plane crash.

"Edward would like to help you through this, but he's somewhat at a loss. He can't bear to be responsible for your pain, however indirectly. He blames himself for putting you through this, and that leaves him paralyzed with guilt, feeling unfit to do anything but step aside in the face of your unhappiness." He gave me a wry smile. "You two are a little too similar in some ways."

"I'm sorry. I don't mean to hurt Edward. He just saved my life! I know I've been unfair to him, shutting him out..."

He stopped me with a gesture. "I don't mean to give you still more to feel guilty about. You and Edward are at an impasse, Bella, because you're reluctant to hurt each other, even when it's necessary. I'm taking it upon myself to intervene. Having once tried to murder you," he said drily, "I don't suppose merely offending you adds to my deficit very significantly."

I shook my head. "There's no deficit, Jasper. It was just a horrible accident. Besides, you helped save my life more than once. Well, who hasn't?" He gave me a half smile. "Okay, tell me whatever you want to tell me. I won't be offended, I promise."

"Very well. As unfortunate as it is that your parents had to lose their only daughter, you can't continue to blame yourself."

"Who else, then?" I asked, getting a little angry. I forgot about appearing normal and happy, and the thoughts that had been running through my mind came spilling out. I talked about how I'd been selfish, sacrificing my parents to my goal of being with Edward. It seems to me I talked about it for a long time.

"It reminds me a little bit of the brides of India," Jasper said calmly, as if I hadn't just finished an emotional rant. "It's still tradition there that Hindu brides are expected to look sad. The custom dates from the time a new bride would have to leave her parents' home and go to live in the home of her new husband's family. In the days before high speed transportation, that could mean they would see each other very seldom, possibly never again. Brides would cry at their own weddings."

"I see," I said, puzzled by this digression.

"But that did not put a stop to all marriages. Women still married. They grieved, and they left their families and moved to the home of their husbands. Life goes on."

"It's a little different," I protested, "when the bride doesn't just move away, she fakes her own death and disappears!"

"Yes, it's different," he agreed, "but that's what is called for in this case. Your new home is at more than just physical distance from your old one.  
"When Alice foresaw you as one of us, she didn't see your mother or father believing you'd died, but that was an inherent part of the vision. It was inevitable, from the time you and Edward first knew each other." He let that sink in a moment. I couldn't disagree with him.  
"The only alternative, besides waiting until were elderly and both your parents had died before you married, would have been for you to separate from Edward. You tried being separated from him once, if you recall, and the results were not only disastrous, it caused both you _and_ your parents tremendous pain."

I didn't answer, but I was listening calmly enough. I looked at Jasper suspiciously. "No," he said, answering my unspoken question, "I'm not doing anything to alter your emotions, not right now." I nodded, and he went on. "You have to be with Edward; and he has to be with you. If you separate from him, your parents get to watch you turn into a mere ghost of yourself, as you did last year.  
"And I know you must realize that if you hadn't met Edward, you would have been crushed to death by that boy's van a few weeks after you arrived in Forks. Your parents would have lost you even sooner.  
"There's simply no way around it. You belong with Edward. Being his wife means parting with your parents - not moving to another village, but to another world. You didn't even make the choice to disappear; fate caused your apparent death. It's painful for them - but at least, thanks to Edward, they had another year or more with you, and were able to see you, fully grown, happy and fulfilled, before you had to leave them."

Tears were flowing down my face, as they hadn't since the accident. "I know. I understand that what you're saying makes sense. I just don't know how to reconcile myself to hurting them just so I can be happy."

He brushed my tears away gently. "Little sister, this family would not care for you as they do, if you were someone who could hurt loved ones easily and without pain. I don't ask you to stop feeling what you're feeling. In fact, I want you to give those feelings free rein, and stop pretending all is well. We all know better, and putting on a brave front for us does nothing but keep you in an emotional dead end, unable to move forward."

He paused again to let me reflect on what he'd said. I finally nodded. It made sense.

"Allow yourself to be unhappy, and finally recover. Right now you're angry with yourself for your parents' bereavement, and hiding your pain to avoid hurting us. You don't have to be so careful of our feelings, you know. This family has seen its share of emotional turmoil, believe me. They can tolerate all the ranting and wailing you care to do. It won't hurt us."

I nodded that I understood.

"Grieve, then, all you want. But please, give yourself permission to let this grief run its course, and finally end. As your parents' grief will end," he added. I looked at him, startled. "They were in great distress over your death," he said. "But certainly you don't expect they will perpetually feel the same pain they experienced when they first learned you'd been killed."

"I...no, of course not."

"It's already starting to fade, slowly. It will take a long time, I'm sure, but you wouldn't want them to mourn forever, would you?"

"No."

"This is a painful thing, and rightly so; but allow yourself to let it run its course, and come to an end."

He waited in silence while I thought over what he'd said, and finally nodded. "Okay." He patted my shoulder and left me to myself.

I did grieve, finally letting my sadness and confusion show openly. I accepted Edward's comfort, and he managed to accept mine. The family, as Jasper had predicted, were untroubled by my moods. I worked through it.

"Can I ask a favour?" I inquired of Edward one day. The other Cullens were nearby, within hearing.

"Of course, love."

"It's about my mom and Charlie. They didn't get any insurance money after my death, and I didn't have anything valuable to leave them. Is there any way I could arrange for them to get something, you know, to retire on? I know they couldn't know it came from me."

Edward smiled, eager to help. "Yes. That could be easily done."

The family worked out two different schemes, an immediate one for my mother involving a lucky lottery ticket, and another for Charlie scheduled to click in eighteen months in the future. Their lives would be financially secure, at least.

Helping them this way helped me as well. Jasper was right: once I stopped trying to hide my distress, I was able to let it diminish and begin to resolve itself.

I knew I was ready to let life go on the day Edward, trying to cheer me up a little, took me for a picnic and a drive through the vast wilderness of a nearby state park. I was over my sense of guilt for loving him so much, enough to discard my former life and family to have him, and I was filled with the sense of joy and wholeness I used to feel when I was with him. Edward seemed to realize this, and his relief at having his loving wife back again was almost tangible. We walked through the dense woods together, talking and laughing, and impulsively he picked me up and ran with me to a portion of the woods with no trails and no campgrounds. It was like a drier, sunnier version of our meadow back in Washington. We sat down together on a bed of dry pine needles, and when he cautiously leaned over to kiss me, I put my arms around his neck and drew myself close to him. The feelings that I'd kept away, suppressed , for the past few weeks came rushing back, and I pulled him down onto the forest floor with me.


	13. Change

When the Cullens finally moved on to their new home in New Hampshire, I was ready to join them. As much as I appreciated the offer to remain in Alaska, I wanted to be with my own family. This required a short meeting.

"The question is, how do Edward and Bella get there?" Emmett said. "They shouldn't be travelling with us, just in case somebody recognizes us."

"They could take a separate plane," Rosalie suggested.

"Would we be taking a plane at all?" Edward asked, looking at me. "Are you comfortable with flying again?"

"Yes, I think so," I said. "Even_ I_ couldn't beat the odds against being in two plane crashes in a row." Everyone thought that was hilarious, especially Rosalie.

"A large commercial flight this time," Alice said firmly. "And maybe they should disguise themselves just a bit? Edward should at least cover up his hair."

We booked a flight apart from the others and two days later. Alice scanned ahead carefully, but couldn't see anyone recognizing us. We were provided with a new identity and the paperwork to go with it. I used my fake driver's license from our club night in Anchorage, now supplemented with birth certificate, passport, and credit card, and was firmly reminded to answer to 'Donna' or 'Ms Stevens' during the trip. Edward was given ID that made him twenty-one, like me, under the name Michael Ryan.

"Emmett wanted to make you Jack and Diane," Alice told me, rolling her eyes. "He doesn't get the 'don't draw attention' part."

"I get it," Emmett protested, "but what are the odds of anyone noticing?"

"You can't talk about odds where Bella is concerned," Rosalie said. "She's Murphy's Law personified."

Alice fell enthusiastically to the task of disguising us, putting us in the shorts and polo shirts of typical young tourists, covering Edward's hair with a ball cap bearing a beer company logo. She arranged my hair in a style I'd never worn before, provided me with a lot of trendy, inexpensive bangle bracelets and a pair of tortoiseshell eyeglasses with non-prescription lenses, and applied just a little too much makeup in slightly too-bright shades. It altered our appearance without too seriously offending Alice's aesthetic sensibilities. "Perfect!" she declared. I placed my wedding band and engagement ring on a chain and wore it around my neck, concealed under my clothes, and I was ready to go.

Edward was concerned that I'd have flashbacks to our last attempt at air travel, and panic. "If you feel like you can't do this, just say the word, Bella," he told me as we waited in the boarding lounge.

"No, I'm okay. The closer to the plane we are, the calmer I get. Should be the other way around, I suppose."

"Obviously, your brain doesn't work right," he said, laughing when I looked at him indignantly.

I stuck my tongue out at him. "My brain works just fine. Better than fine. I'm gifted, remember? I have it on good authority."

"Doubly gifted, in fact. Eleazar says he's never known anyone to have two supernormal talents, especially before their change." He looked at me with that expression of rapt admiration he sometimes wore. It no longer seemed as completely inappropriate as it once had.

"I'm still not sure about this second gift. Is getting an occasional hunch really such a supernatural talent? Detectives do it all the time."

"I trust Eleazar's ability. The Volturi had complete faith in his readings."

"I guess we'll see."

Our seats were big, fully reclining and comfortable, in a full sized aircraft with seating for about 200 and a large, fully occupied first class section. We had the movie screen and headphones that came with the territory. "Not as much privacy as on our last flight," I noted, "but with extra luxury features, like being able to stay in the air."

"I'm surprised you can joke about it. I thought you'd be terrified to fly, especially so soon," Edward said.

"I'm officially dead. That means I don't have to be afraid of anything, ever again."

He gave me a quizzical look. "Your humour isn't usually that dark."

"I didn't mean it to be. I just mean...that really was the point when I cut my final ties to that world. The crash feels like something that happened in another life. I'm at the beginning of a new life now."

"And that period of melancholy, after our nominal funeral?"

"I guess you could call that my passage over the River Styx. One last river I had to cross."

He nodded thoughtfully. "And Jasper was your Charon."

"My what?"

"The boatman who ferries people across the Styx."

"Oh, that's right. Yes, I suppose he was. I hope Jasper wouldn't mind the comparison."

"I think he'd appreciate knowing he was of help."

"I thanked him as well as I could. I'd like to repay him somehow, one day. He told me just what I needed to hear, to help me let go. And when we get home," I paused, realizing just how much our destination felt like home, "I want to take the next step."

His eyes widened. "Right away? Are you sure?"

"I'm very sure." He didn't argue.

We were on a 10:15 p.m. flight, meaning we'd be in the air through much of the night, until our pre-dawn stopover in Minneapolis. I accepted a cocktail from the flight attendant, assuming it would help me sleep. "I'm twenty-one now, remember?" I said in answer to Edward's surprised look. He grinned and requested one for himself as well, which I also drank. We reclined the seats, myself in order to sleep, and Edward in order to pretend to sleep.

"Tell me the truth," I murmured to him, lying back with his arm around me. "Was I drunk that time we went to the big nightclub in Anchorage?"

"Not drunk, no. Slightly elevated, perhaps."

"I noticed you cut me off after two drinks. Did I make a fool of myself?"

"Not in the least. You became less inhibited about dancing, which was enjoyed by all. But I thought you'd reached a comfortable limit."

I thought he might be editing a little, out of courtesy, but I didn't press him. "Will I be able to dance as well as all of you, after?"

"Of course."

"That will be nice." I shifted closer to him and closed my eyes.

I woke up long enough to change planes, a little groggily, in Minnesota. "It's very cloudy here," I noted, looking out the window of our second plane as it taxied down the runway. "Is that usual?"

"Fairly usual. We might find a home in Minnesota at some point. "

"Good." I fell asleep again before the plane had taken off.

It was almost afternoon before we finally pulled in the drive leading to the big white house with its wraparound porch, a former bed and breakfast which had failed because of its extremely isolated location. Perfect for us.

We were shown around the house, which was already largely in order under Esme's supervision, the ground floor decorated in the pale on pale colour scheme that was her trademark. The furnishings were in keeping with the early eighteenth century house, yet gave the feeling of a comfortable, modern home, not a museum display. Esme had an unerring eye for that sort of thing.

From there, Edward and I were taken out to the former barn, which had been hastily restored and turned into a honeymoon cottage for us. I was grateful for their thoughtfulness, and thanked them all warmly. The place was perfect, with a large living area, a smaller space furnished as a bedroom, and a newly installed bathroom complete with oversized tub. "This is amazing," I said. "It's wonderful. Thank you so much. How did you manage it in only a couple of days?"

In answer, everyone looked at Esme. "Of course," Edward said. "Thank you, Esme."

"You're very welcome, sweetheart," she said. "We'll leave you alone to settle in."

"I guess we won't be seeing much of you two for a while," Emmett joked.

"You'd guess wrong," I said. "In fact, I'd like to talk to everyone in a little while, if that's okay."

"Of course, Bella," Carlisle said. "We're all at leisure for the afternoon. Come back to the house when you're ready." They left us to ourselves.

I washed off my Donna Stevens makeup, brushed my hair, and changed out of my wrinkled travelling clothes. "I think some of our belongings have already been transferred here," Edward said, opening a set of double doors. I looked; the doors led to a closet larger than the entire bedroom, in which our clothing, and some new items I didn't recognize, had been neatly organized on hangers and shelves.

"That has to be Alice's doing," I said, scanning the vast expanse of closet. "Are we ready?"

We spent a little time catching up with the rest of the family, talking about our trip, the upcoming semester, and day to day details. Finally, Carlisle said, "Bella, I believe you had something to discuss with us."

"Yes. Well, it's something I've already talked to you about. I told you that I'd accept your direction on exactly when it was supposed to take place, and I will. But if you have no particular reason for delaying, well...I think it's time."

Practicalities were discussed. It was another three weeks before college classes began, and Carlisle wouldn't start night shifts at the local hospital until late September. It seemed like a perfect window of opportunity.

"We'll all be available if Bella needs, er, supervision at first," Esme said.

"Presumably she will," Jasper said.

"Have you come to any agreement about who will carry out the change?" Carlisle asked.

"Yes." Edward looked at me. "I will."

Carlisle nodded. "I'm pleased to hear it."

"The one objection I have to the timing," Edward went on, "is that we haven't devised any reliable method of controlling the pain."

"Son," Carlisle said regretfully, "we're unlikely to make such a discovery, no matter how much time we allow; and if we did, we would have no way to test its effectiveness."

"I know." Edward ran his hand through his hair in agitation. "I can't believe I"m going to deliberately subject her to such pain..."

I leaned against him. "Edward, it's the only way."

"It is, but...I _hate_ that you have to go through that experience."

"You're putting me through it so I can come out the other side, as your real partner."

"I know." He rubbed both hands over his head. His hair was a complete mess.

"Should I ask Jasper to have a talk with you? He's really good with things like this." There was a ripple of laughter from everyone, even Edward. Jasper dipped his head in ironic thanks for the tribute. "I'm not looking forward to the pain, Edward; and I hate the idea of you seeing me like that. But you're doing this for me. Well, for both of us." He nodded. "If you really feel you can't do it, I know Carlisle will keep his promise and fill in."

"No," Edward said. "You want me to be the one to do it; and I want to be, in spite of everything."

"Any further discussion?" Carlisle asked. There was none. "Then I believe it's settled. We have only to set a date."

"I don't think there's any day that would be a problem," Esme said. "Shall we leave it up to Bella?" There seemed to be a consensus.

"When, Bella?" Carlisle asked.

"Tomorrow," I said. "I don't want to put it off any more. If you can be ready, I want to do it tomorrow."

It was unanimously accepted, and for the rest of the afternoon we dropped the subject, and the family conducted itself as if nothing unusual were going on. I was given dinner, which was lobster, I was happy to see. When Emmett tried to make jokes about the condemned prisoner receiving a last meal, Rosalie slapped him on the side of the head, and he stopped.

When night fell, Edward and I said goodnight and walked hand in hand out the back door and across the rolling property to our cottage.

I'd expected to spend the night with a grim, angsty Edward, or at least an Edward who was outwardly cheerful but obviously hiding inner turmoil; but now that the thing was underway, he seemed to give up all resistance. He made it a romantic night, not in a desperate last-chance way, but warm and casual and unhurried, like our wedding night. We reminisced about our early days in Forks High School, and he made me laugh with stories about being forced to keep track of me by listening to the thoughts of students in class with me, and sifting through their overcrowded brains for a glimpse of 'the new girl.' I made him laugh in turn by describing how I'd redirect my annoyance over his ignoring me into hatred for his stupid, shiny Volvo.

We undressed and lay holding each other on the pretty white bed, and finally made love in the limited ways available to us for now. Then we talked quietly until I began to yawn, and he softly hummed my lullaby.

"That's such a beautiful tune," I said drowsily. "Was it really meant to be a lullaby?"

"Yes," he said softly, kissing my forehead. "In a way. It was inspired by the sight of you sleeping." I looked at him. "No," he answered my expression, "I'm not sorry I won't see that again. I'll always have it, _here_." He tapped his forehead.

I nodded, curled up against him, and fell asleep for the last time.

In the morning, when we returned to the house, everyone was mercifully brisk and businesslike. In place of breakfast, Carlisle asked me to drink some liquid food supplement and two glasses of water. I thought it best not to ask why. I was brought upstairs to one of the bedrooms, where Alice braided my hair. I assumed it was to keep it from becoming tangled, or possibly even torn out, during the process, but again didn't ask.

Carlisle explained what he was going to do to try and reduce the pain. "I have no idea if morphine will be effective against this kind of pain; we can only try. I'll give you the injection a minute or two before."

I nodded. "I want to apologize to everyone in advance for anything I might say to you over the next three days." Nobody laughed. Alice hugged me.

"We're hoping it might be slightly less than three days," Carlisle said. "I spoke with the Denali, looking for ways to reduce the time. Eleazar told me that the process takes less time if the venom is placed close to the heart, and at several different points on the body. That's what Edward will do."

"Okay." I knew if I delayed any more I might chicken out, so I lay down on the bed. "Ready."

Carlisle drew out a syringe, and I held my breath and scrunched up my face while he gave me the injection. "Are you all right, Bella?"

"Sure. I just don't like needles." Rosalie laughed mirthlessly and shook her head. Everyone quietly slipped out of the room, leaving me alone with Edward.

He sat down beside me on the bed. "Carlisle is staying close, in case I have any trouble. I'm sure I can stop after biting you, but I don't want to take any chances."

"Good." He seemed to be waiting for me to give him the go-ahead. "You begin whenever you're ready, Edward."

He nodded, taking my hand and kissing me gently. "I love you, Bella."

"I love you," I whispered.

He looked into my eyes a moment, and I stared back, a little dazzled in spite of the tense situation. Then he bent, softly kissed my throat, and bit.

I don't know if the morphine reduced the pain or not; all I can say is, it didn't reduce it nearly enough. The burning sensation began spreading from my neck into my chest within seconds. Edward bit me again and again, on either side of my neck, in the upper arm and the thigh, and finally on some carefully pinpointed spot near my collarbone. Before he was finished, I was struggling not to scream. I managed to avoid it for maybe twenty minutes.

I was on fire, burning but never being turned to ash so it could come to an end. I forgot that I was going to remain quiet to avoid upsetting Edward. I shrieked mindlessly. The screaming didn't help, and I tried to lie quietly and breathe, but every so often I would lapse back into screaming again, like someone relaxing back into a seated position. Screaming was, for a while, the path of least resistance. After some time, my voice began to give out, and I became exhausted; then I just lay and panted and whimpered, feeling like an animal caught in a trap. Why had I done this? Why had I considered it a good idea at some point? I couldn't really remember. The pain blocked out everything else.

There had never been anything else but pain. There never would be anything else. It was endless, bottomless, hopeless.

I don't know how long this went on, but at some point I noticed a change. The pain was as great, but I was able to be aware of other things, just a little. I recognized that Edward was in the room, holding my hand. I heard him whispering, over and over, "Bella, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I love you, Bella." I couldn't answer him, but I was able to remember, just a little, why this was happening. It was like a light at the end of a very long, very dark tunnel.

Eventually, I found I was able to control my actions a little bit better. The pain hadn't decreased, but I was able to stop screaming, to lie still and just focus intently on my breathing. I was glad, because I could now remember that my screaming would be painful to Edward. Breathe in, breathe out; I thought of that, and nothing else.

Much later, I recognized more changes. Even while burning, I found I could see and hear other things, take them in and understand them. I heard voices sometimes, as people went in and out of the room. I could feel Edward's cold hand holding mine. I could recognize his scent. It was a comfort as I burned, a reminder of what this was all for. It will end, I was able to tell myself. Eventually it will come to an end, and Edward and I will be together, forever.

Still later, I heard Alice enter the bedroom - somehow knowing it was Alice, even with my eyes closed - and heard Edward say to her, "How much longer?" She paused, and replied, "Three hours, forty-seven minutes." I tightened my grip on Edward's hand a moment, the motion breaking my concentration and causing me to whimper and thrash around briefly, until I regained control.

Edward understood what had caused my reaction. "Yes, love; the end is in sight. It's nearly over." I just breathed rhythmically. "I know; lying still helps you. I won't disturb you, love. Do whatever helps."

I found that I could effortlessly calculate how many seconds were in three hours and forty-seven minutes, and distracted myself by counting down, timing the seconds exactly based on the distant ticking of a wall clock. I didn't question this ability, just counted down. _Thirteen thousand, six hundred twenty; thirteen thousand six hundred nineteen; thirteen thousand_...

When I reached eight thousand, Alice returned, and I heard her arguing briefly with Edward about something. "Her clothes are in tatters, Edward. She has to wear _some_thing. Besides, shouldn't she have something special for when she gets up? Look how beautiful she is."

"She's always been beautiful," Edward said. "All right, Alice, if you must. Disturb her as little as possible, please."

I heard Alice's voice close to me. "Bella, I'm just going to change your clothes. You don't have to move or do anything." I felt myself being moved around, cloth slipped from my body and new items put in their place. I remained limp and unresisting, counting down.

When I got to a thousand or so, things began to change more drastically. I felt the burning begin to recede from my extremities. My fingers and toes felt cool and free from pain. I kept counting, waiting, and the burning receded, incredibly slowly but still just perceptibly. Family members seemed to go in and out of the room more often now. I found I could easily identify them, even with my eyes closed. Their scents were as distinctive as their appearance; more so, really. The honey-lilac-and-almost-sunshine smell I loved remained close by all the time, but as the hours passed I had become able to discern it better, recognize subleties that had escaped me before. I breathed it in and analyzed it; and tasted and identified the scent of each family member; and listened to the distant sounds of traffic, music, a far-off church bell; and counted down the seconds, not missing a beat. I was able to do all these things at once, effortlessly, as if I had multiple brains, all functioning independently.

When I reached two hundred twenty, the burning suddenly began to recede much faster. My arms and legs became cool; the top of my head, then my face, were free from pain in seconds. The fire seemed to be moving inward, toward my heart, which was hammering away rapidly. _Almost time_ I heard Alice say in an urgent voice; then Jasper call out _Emmett, get up here!_ Light footsteps, then no sound except my breathing, and theirs. My nose told me they were all in the room, clustered together beside the bed, between the door and the window.

The fire continued to constrict itself until only my chest was burning. I lost track of the seconds at last, as the fire became concentrated in my heart. My heart tapped wildly, faster than was humanly possible. I took one last breath and held it, my back arching upward as the burning withdrew into a single, scalding point. My heart paused, beat weakly once, twice, then stopped altogether. The fire was gone.

I lay still for several seconds, rejoicing in being free from pain at last. I slowly opened my eyes. At first I wasn't sure what I was seeing. The ceiling, of course; but other things as well. Dust particles drifting like miniature planets, every facet of them easily distinguished with my new eyes. A fruit fly landed on the far wall; I could make out its tiny, iridescent wings, its gleaming red eyes, each detail of its delicate legs. "So beautiful!" I whispered.

Reflexively, I took a breath. I found I didn't need the oxygen, but wanted to inhale so I could _see_. Each scent was unmistakable, truly like seeing but better, clearer than vision. I turned my head in the direction of the one scent that stood out from the others, that honey-lilac-and-almost-sunshine smell, and found myself looking into Edward's eyes. He was still holding my hand. "You're warm!" I exclaimed. I didn't recognize my voice; it sounded pleasant and musical.

He smiled, and I blinked at the sight, his face so beautiful, now that I could really and truly see it, that it almost hurt. "No, love. It's just that we're the same temperature now."

"Oh! Of course." I seemed to come to a standing position without the slightest effort, at the same instant I thought of getting up. I was distracted by this, and by a thousand other new experiences happening at the same time, but there was something important I had to say. I focused on Edward's face, and found the distractions fading into the background. "May I introduce myself?" I asked. His smile widened. "I'm your wife, Isabella Cullen."

He laughed and joyfully embraced me, picking me up in a hug and swinging me around, then stood still and kissed me. He'd kissed me before, many times, but not for real, I now realized, only in a watered-down version, necessary at the time for the sake of my safety. Now he held nothing back. I wound my arms around him, threading my fingers through his beautiful, unkempt hair, feeling its silkiness more clearly than ever against my palms. Feeling everything about him distinctly, vividly...I wound a leg around one of his and pressed myself closer.

A half cough, half laugh reminded me that we were not alone. I pulled away, embarrassed at my display; but Edward seemed undisturbed. He loosened his hold, but kept me in his embrace. I hid my face against his chest a moment, and was overwhelmed by the scent that filled my lungs. It was the sweetest smell in the world, the essence of Edward. I inhaled deeply, burrowed my face into his shirt, inhaled again and again. This time several laughs could be heard, and I moved away, holding Edward's hand but avoiding full body contact.

I turned to face my family. "Sorry!" I stared at them, seeing them all as if for the first time.

"You have nothing whatsoever to be sorry for, my dear," Carlisle said. "How do you feel?"

"I feel..." I found I couldn't put words to it. "I don't know how to explain. I still feel like myself, but I can see and hear _everything_! And the smells! I can smell what everything is, without looking, from so far away." I paused a moment, distracted by the unfamiliar sound of my own voice and the information pouring in from all around me. "I can think about it all at the same time, and yet..." I stopped, distracted again, this time by the sight of my own hand in the moonlight coming through the bedroom window. I looked up to find Edward watching me, his face radiant with joy. I forced myself to turn back to the others. "But it's so hard to concentrate!"

"That's perfectly normal," Edward told me. "It will become easier very quickly."

"I'm so sorry the morphine wasn't effective, Bella," Carlisle said.

"Maybe it helped a little bit," I said, but he shook his head, smiling at my attempt to dissemble. "Well, it doesn't matter now." I looked around the room, feeling foolish for the way I was distracted by random objects, but everything was so new and different. My eyes kept coming back to Edward.

Carlisle looked back at Jasper, who nodded. "She seems to be under control at the moment."

That caught my attention, and I realized the Cullens had arranged themselves strategically, Emmett and Jasper, the strongest fighters, in the front, the others behind them, as though prepared for a threat. "Am I dangerous to you?" I asked uncertainly.

"Potentially," Jasper said. "We're taking precautions. Don't be concerned." My eyes went to Jasper, and I stiffened. He was covered with scars from the battles he'd fought, clearly visible to me now and, to my altered vision, his most prominent feature. The sight caused an instinctive reaction, a defensiveness; his appearance signalled _dangerous_ as clearly as a flashing red light. He grinned, feeling my reaction. The grin seemed to speak volumes, still at an instinctive level; it diffused the warning. I saw Alice peering around Jasper's shoulder, smiling at me. Her appearance was different, too. It was almost as if I could see her personality faintly, through her skin. It was the same with all of them. I turned to Carlisle last of all, and my mouth fell open as I took in _his_ appearance with my new vision. It was like seeing an angel, his goodness almost visible, like a nimbus. I moved my gaze from him to Esme, who wore warmth and affection like an invisible garment.

The Cullens waited patiently while I gaped at them. "Sorry," I said again. "Distracting." They all laughed, and this time I laughed with them.

"Bella," Alice started to move forward, but Jasper stopped her. "Bella," she repeated, staying where she was, "look in the mirror." She pointed to an oval full-lenth mirror near the wall behind me. I turned to look, and stared at my reflection. It was me, but not me. The same long brown hair, the same shape to my face, the same slight figure, even the same mouth with the slightly too-large upper lip; but everything had been smoothed, perfected, enhanced. I was as beautiful as one of the Cullens. I noticed that I was wearing a blue silk dress and white high heeled sandals. But it was hard to focus on anything but the shocking, crimson eyes.

"What do you think?" Alice asked.

I continued to stare. "I look like one of you," I said, "but still kind of like me."

"You look lovely, Bella," Esme said.

I stared at my reflection. Looking at the young woman who stared back at me, seeing her objectively, like a portrait of a stranger, I was able to recognize that she really was lovely, in her own, distinctive way. Not stunning and perfect like Rosalie, or buxom and gorgeous like Esme, or pretty and elfin like Alice. She looked sweet and delicate, slender but womanly, with a gentle, appealing face. Then I made the leap, and accepted that this image was really _me_. Edward had his wish at last: I saw myself as he saw me.

"You like it, don't you?" Alice said, sounding a little worried.

"I do. I like it very much. But the eyes!" I stared. Jasper moved forward slightly, apparently feeling my emotions. "I expected that, but it's still a shock to see them." I turned to look at Edward. "Just a few months?"

"Yes, love."

"Okay, then." Jasper seemed to stand down. "My throat hurts," I added abruptly. As soon as I said it, the burning came to the front of my consciousness. I placed my hand against my neck.

"You're thirsty, of course," Carlisle said quickly. "You should hunt. Edward, will you take her? Do you want us to go with you?"

"Alice?" Edward was looking at her. "Will it be safe?"

"Decide which direction you're taking," she told him. He nodded, and her eyes took on that faraway look. "No," she said decisively. "Not that way. Campers. Try White Mountain, along the northern boundary of the park." She faded out again. "Good. No humans. Just stay within the park. She'll be fine."

"Thanks, Alice," Edward said. He turned to me and took my hand. "Bella, let's hunt."

I opened my eyes wide in consternation that was only half feigned. They all laughed. "Don't worry, little sister," Emmett said. "You'll do fine. Edward will help if you need it, but it's like falling off a log. You've always been able to do _that_, right?" I made a face at him, and he snickered.

Esme opened the bedroom window. and Edward gestured me toward it. I stopped short a moment, staring at the distant landscape I could see with impossible clarity. Then an impulse overtook me and I rushed back to the family. Emmett hastily stepped in front of the others, but Jasper waved him back, recognizing that I was not attacking. "Thank you!" I said, hugging each of them tightly in turn. Maybe too tightly; some of them seemed to wince slightly. "Thank you all so much for everything! I love you all." I let them go and moved toward the window, appearing there the instant I thought of moving in that direction. That would take some getting used to.

I hesitated at the window, looking down at the ground some distance below. I _felt_ perfectly safe jumping from this height, but recognized that past experience should probably tell me it was dangerous. "We could go downstairs and through the door if you'd rather, Bella," Edward said.

"Nah," Emmett told me. "Just pretend you're jumping out of an airplane."

I laughed along with the others. I took Edward's hand, allowing him to escort me through the window as though I were a princess and he was gallantly handing me into a carriage, stood on the window ledge a moment, then leapt.

It was even easier than I'd expected. The fall, although it took only a second or so, was as easy to track as if it had happened in extreme slow motion. I adjusted my position minutely as I fell, so that I landed lightly and gracefully on my feet. Edward landed beside me a moment later. He took my hand and we ran together through the darkness that was no longer dark, into the surrounding woods.


	14. Starlight

Once I began to run, I understood how Edward had been able to move at such breathtaking speeds, yet never run into anything, not so much as a tree branch. I ran through the woods, so fast I would be all but invisible to human eyes, but it was incredibly easy to maneuver around obstacles. Easier than it had been when I was human, and travelling at a slow walk. I suppose my mind worked even faster than I could run, and I could not only dodge objects as I approached them, I could see every detail of each tree, each leaf, each blade of grass. They were all richly coloured. "So beautiful!" I said again.

"What is, love?" Edward asked, running at my side.

"Everything!" I turned to him, and was amazed once again. "You, especially."

As an experiment, I reached out as I ran and plucked a leaf from a low hanging branch. I was able to detach it carefully, without disturbing any neighbouring leaves or so much as breaking a twig. I twirled the leaf in my fingers, admiring its vibrant colours, the delicate tracing of veins, the faint dusting of pollen. I stopped running a moment, and Edward stopped as well, turning to face me. "This is Carmen's painting!" I exclaimed.

"Excuse me?"

"Carmen had a painting on an easel, back at their house in Alaska. It was a picture of a forest. The colours were all sort of odd, intense. I thought it was just some kind of artistic experiment, but she was trying to paint the forest the way she saw it."

He smiled. "Yes. Specifically, the way she saw it in the dark. Colours are different in the dark."

I nodded, looking around. "How can we see so well without light?"

"There's light, love. The stars provide all the light we need, even if there's no moon. Our eyes adjust."

I looked up at the stars, and had to stand still and stare for several minutes. If a broken leaf or dust particle astonished me with its beauty, the starry sky was almost too much to take. I finally lowered my eyes to find Edward smiling at me, even more beautiful than the stars. "You're enjoying your new eyes."

"Yes!"

"But I'm surprised you can even take notice right now. Aren't you terribly thirsty?"

Once he brought it to my attention, thirst came to the forefront of my awareness. I put a hand to my burning throat. "Focus, Bella. Find your prey."

"How?"

"By smell. What do you smell right now?"

"Well..." I inhaled. "You." I inhaled again. His scent was beyond delicious.

He chuckled. "What else?"

I drew in a long breath, turning my head from side to side. I could smell _everything_: damp earth, vegetation, even the faint odour of a distant, extinguished campfire. "There's nothing in particular..." I started to say, then stopped short. A smell suddenly hit me, a far-off smell with a faint promise of relief for my burning thirst.

"That's it, love." I peered intently in the direction of the scent. "Don't use your eyes, sweetheart. Use your nose. It will lead you."

I inhaled, and found he was right. I could follow the smell as if it were a series of brightly lit directional signs. I darted off, Edward following behind me. "There," I heard him say softly. I stopped, and saw a small group of deer some distance ahead.

"What do I do?"

"Let your instincts guide you." I watched the deer uncertainly. "Would you like me to go first?" I nodded. He kissed me and ran toward the deer, his movements sinuous as a lion's. The deer immediately scattered, but he seized a small buck, deftly pinning it. It looked to me as if he broke its neck, then bent and bit, and drank. My mind was equally taken up by the fierce beauty of Edward hunting, and the way the sight of him feeding made my own thirst flare up. I stared at the retreating deer, ravenous, and took off after them. Edward was right: my instincts directed me. Without even thinking, I caught a large buck, sinking my teeth into its neck before it had even hit the ground. The blood slid exquisitely down my throat, easing my thirst and satisfying the deep craving I'd hardly understood until I tasted blood.

I stood up, wiping blood from my mouth with my hand, then wiping the hand off on the grass. I saw that there was a smear of blood on my new dress, and that I'd ripped out the hem on one side. Edward approached, having finished with his own deer. He was still immaculate. "Well done, Bella! How do you feel now?"

"Better. It felt so _good_ to chase the deer, and catch it! Like the urge to chase it down was part of the thirst. Alice told me hunting was more fun than eating food, but I don't think I really believed her before."

"The hunting instinct is very strong." He showed me how to dispose of the deer carcasses.

"Why are deer out at night?" I asked.

"It's close to dawn. They're early risers."

"Wouldn't it be nice if we could keep the deer meat after we've hunted?"

He looked shocked. "What on earth for?"

"We could cut it up and freeze it, and give it to food banks and soup kitchens. I mean, it would go to waste otherwise. People might as well eat it."

He stared at me with an expression I couldn't interpret. "I don't believe any of us have ever thought of that." He brushed my rumpled hair back from my face. "Do you need to drink more?"

"I'm not sure. I still feel a little thirsty. But why should I be?"

"In the early weeks, you'll be thirsty much of the time. Eventually, you can go weeks without hunting. But not now. Would you like to try again?"

I nodded, inhaling deeply, feeling myself go into a tense, expectant state that was rather pleasant. Hunting already felt very natural to me. I ran, testing the air, and suddenly stopped short. My head whipped around to face what I somehow knew was north by north-west. "What's that?" I asked, excited.

"Bear."

I followed the scent, sweeter than the earlier smell of the deer. There was one bear, a male, alone. I didn't hesitate this time. The bear didn't even know what hit him.

"That was better than the deer," I noted, as Edward and I took care of the bear's remains.

"Herbivores are generally not as appealing. Their scent is less like that of humans."

"_Now_ I've had enough." I looked around at the vivid woods. "Can we run some more?"

"Of course!" He took my hand and we dashed through the forest together.

I tested my new body, leaping from the ground to a tree branch, swinging myself up to higher and higher branches, then climbing rapidly back down the trunk. I leapt across wide streams in one bound, jumped up and turned somersaults in midair. Edward laughed at my clowning. "Are you having fun?"

"Yes! I've never been able to even walk fast without falling over something, and _now_ look at me!"

"I am," he murmured. "You're as beautiful as ever - and I'll admit, far more graceful."

I laughed and threw my arms around his neck. "I love you!"

"As I love you." He bent to kiss me. I returned the kiss, and discovered still more about my new and improved body. I had always loved kissing Edward, but now the experience was enhanced beyond all expectation. Not only could he now embrace me freely, without fear of injuring me, but my senses were able to take in every detail in a way that hadn't been possible before. I could feel things more intensely, every touch of his hand against my shoulder, every caress of his lips against mine, was like an explosion of pleasure, more than I could have borne when I was human, but now I absorbed it all. And added to all that, there was his scent, that lush essence of Edward I could smell and taste and almost feel.

His scent began to alter subtly as we kissed, become even more enticing. "Your scent is changing," I whispered, during a very short pause between kisses.

"So is yours," he murmured in my ear. "Why do you think that is?" He smirked at me, and I got it.

I pulled him to the ground, laughing at the new experience of being stronger than he was. He went with me willingly, and we rolled together, locked in a tight embrace, on a rocky plateau that was no less comfortable than a pillow-top mattress. "Are we alone?" I gasped, thinking I should make sure although I didn't really care any more.

"Completely alone," he confirmed. I started to pull at his shirt, but he said, "Gently, Bella. We may want to have clothing to wear back home." Reluctantly, I took the extra seconds required to unbutton his clothing and remove it in one piece. He unzipped my dress and drew it over my head, removed my underthings, and pulled me back down onto the stony surface.

If kissing Edward was a hundred times better in my new form, making love with him was a mind-altering revelation. It was all so perfectly effortless and unhurried and unbearably sweet. With no further need to hold anything back, we proceeded to consummate our marriage, and continued to do so until the sun was overhead. Then we finally paused.

I let out a long, non-verbal expression of extreme satisfaction. Edward laughed. "I concur."

"It's amazing!"

"It most definitely is that." He kissed my throat.

"But I'm starting to understand just how much you had to hold back, before."

"Perhaps I did. But as you've already more than made it up to me, it no longer matters."

"I thought you said I'd have no interest in this for at least three months."

"Apparently this is one more way in which you're exceptional."

We began again, no more tired or less ardent than we had been when we'd started, hours ago.

During another pause, realizing how much time had passed, I said, "I wonder if we should be getting back to the house. Will your family be expecting us?"

"They can wait," he said, his hands already roaming again. "But," he added reluctantly, "I suppose it would be only right to look in. They might worry."

"We don't have to stay long," I pointed out.

"Certainly not."

We pulled our rumpled clothes on and ran back the way we'd come. We stopped off at our cottage to change clothes, the sight of Edward undressing very nearly causing me to postpone our departure, then finally returned to the farmhouse as the sun dropped low in the western sky.

"You're back!" Alice said, running to the door. "Bella, where's your blue dress?"

"It had bear blood all over it," I explained. "We stopped at the cottage to change."

"That's quite a closet you've installed, by the way," Edward added.

She grinned. "Thanks!"

"Bear!" Emmett exclaimed. "Beginner's luck."

"A bear, and a white tailed deer," Edward said. "She did very well."

"Excellent. How are you feeling now, Bella?" Carlisle asked.

"Great. Not so thirsty. And things are a little less confusing."

"The hunting didn't bother you?" Rosalie asked.

"No," I said, surprised. "Why would it? I knew I'd be hunting animals."

"That's true," she said. "I guess the training sessions helped." I recalled that Rosalie had been repelled by the idea that she would have to hunt animals and drink their blood. It had taken her some time to become reconciled to her new nature.

"You seem far less distracted now," Jasper remarked. "In fact, you seem remarkably focused."

"That was the case the entire time we were out," Edward said. "She made conversation during the run, remarked on the appearance of the woods, asked questions. She experimented with her speed, tested how far she could leap, all very systematically."

They were all looking at me. "What's so strange about that? This is all new to me. I wanted to...try things out."

"It's quite reasonable, Bella," Carlisle told me, "but it's also very unusual for a newborn, mere hours old, to have this degree of control." He looked at Jasper.

"I can't explain it." Jasper studied me, frowning. "She's not fixated on her thirst; and she's far too calm."

"I don't _feel_ all that calm," I said. "Everything's so different, and it's hard to take it all in."

"Of course; but you're able to express that feeling in a perfectly rational way," Carlisle explained. "Still, everyone reacts differently. Bella may alternate between agitated and more tranquil phases."

"So you're all waiting for me to turn into Mr. Hyde?" I asked.

Emmett laughed at that. "Pretty much. I'm looking forward to it, personally."

"I wonder," Edward said. "Bella's been perfectly stable and rational the entire time we were away." He caught my eye, sharing the secret that for much of that time I'd been...distracted.

"Maybe it's all the preparation she received," Esme suggested.

"Or maybe it's a _third_ gift," Alice said. "Wouldn't that be something?"

"All we can do is wait and see," Carlisle concluded. "Bella, I hope you won't take offence if we continue to take precautions around you."

"No, of course not." It felt weird being a potential threat to the family, but I didn't want them to take chances.

Carlisle asked me a series of questions about my state of mind and perception, apparently as research rather than polite chitchat; then the conversation became more general.

As much as I normally enjoyed the Cullens' company, as night came on I found myself anxious to get away and hunt again - and also, to be alone with Edward so we could continue our second honeymoon.

I held a hand against my throat and glanced at the door; Esme noticed. "Bella, no doubt you want to hunt again."

"I do, actually."

"By all means, go, Bella," Carlisle said. "We understand."

Edward and I ran once more into the state forest, this time taking a slightly different direction. "Will they expect us back anytime soon?" I asked.

"No, I shouldn't think so." He smirked a little as he spoke, and I raised an eyebrow. "Jasper picked up on our mood. If the family wonder what's become of us, no doubt he'll mention that you've bypassed the usual three month waiting period."

My first impulse was to find this embarrassing, but I decided I didn't care. The family would only consider it reason to be happy for us.

I tracked down and took another white tailed deer - there seemed to be a lot of them - and my thirst was slaked once more. Then Edward and I walked and ran together, playfully racing each other, talking and holding hands in the bright nighttime. He bent to kiss me, and I returned his embrace, my thoughts returning instantly to where they had been before our visit. "Shall we go back to our cottage," he suggested, "and continue our honeymoon in more traditional surroundings?"

"That would be lovely," I sighed, "apart from having to wait until we can get there."

"Your patience will be rewarded," he promised in a voice that made me tingle. He took my hand and we ran together through the radiant starlit forest, avoiding the main house altogether, straight to our cottage.

We didn't set foot outside for six days. From time to time one of us suggested that we ought to drop in on the family, but we couldn't quite bring ourselves to get dressed and walk away from the privacy of our little refuge. I was finally driven out by the need to hunt again. Our lovemaking had overshadowed any other concerns for days, but finally my thirst became impossible to ignore.

We dressed and ran back to the woods, this time by daylight, where I took another deer. Since we were, by then, dressed and out of each other's arms, we found it possible to remain that way long enough to return to the house. We found the entire family putting the finishing touches on a back yard deck.

"Hello, dears," Esme said, smiling as we approached.

"Hello," Edward said, kissing her cheek. "Good afternoon, everyone."

"Esme, that looks great," I said, admiring the flower beds she'd already put in.

"Thank you, sweetheart."

"Long time no see," Emmett said, smirking at Edward. "Looks like you two are going to give Rose and me a run for our money."

"Probably so," Edward said complacently.

"Speaking of breaking records," Alice said, "Bella, that's the worst I've ever seen your hair look. Including just after falling out of a plane."

"There's no hairbrush in the cottage," I said, trying to smooth my hair with my fingers, "and I went hunting again."

"Well, come and be tidied up." I followed her into the house, looking back at Edward as I went. Emmett was clapping him on the back in a congratulatory manner. I found I could hear their conversation clearly, even after I was up on the second floor. Emmett's wisecracks I could have done without; but I also heard Carlisle quietly tell Edward, "You look happier than I've ever seen you, son."

I washed my hands and face, then sat meekly as Alice brushed out my hair and pinned it up in a loose bun. "There," she said. "Now just change out of those clothes, and you'll be fit for company." She fetched a red wrap dress she'd apparently bought since the last time I'd been here. I slipped off my grass- and dirt-stained clothing and put on the dress. "So things are going well?" she asked casually.

"Couldn't be better," I said. "I mean that literally. If things got any better, the universe would implode."

She grinned happily and hugged me, and we returned to the back garden.

"Can I help?" I asked Esme, who was applying stain to the deck railing. She smiled and handed me a second brush, and I started working, delighted at the way I could work neatly and with precise detail, yet still incredibly fast.

"Bella," Carlisle said as we came out the back door, "if I may ask, how often have you hunted so far?"

"Well, the first night I went out, and the following morning I took a deer; and again just now."

"You haven't hunted for six days?" Jasper asked incredulously.

"No." I looked around at the others. "Is that too long?"

Emmett snickered, and Rosalie rolled her eyes. "There's no rule about it," Carlisle told me, "but it's much longer than most newborns would find comfortable."

"Six days!" Jasper commented. "And she's already taking an interest in...other things. It _has_ to be more than just being prepared."

"So I would assume; but I can't say what it might be. She's quite a mystery." I kept my eyes on my work, embarrassed at the attention. "We'll have to ask Eleazar if he might have missed anything, although that's unlikely."

"You can ask him to check again, when they all come here next month," I said. I was a little curious myself.

"Next month?"

"Yeah, when they move to their new house."

Esme and I had finished the deck in under three minutes. She paused, paintbrush in hand, to look at me. "When they come _here_?"

"Sure."

"What makes you think they're moving here?" Rosalie asked.

"They just are," I said. "Because..." I stopped, frowning. I could see, as clear as day, that it was true. I _knew_ the Denali were looking for a house in New England. But how did I know it? There were a lot of little pieces that had come together to form that information, and I could almost, not quite, see them all, as if they were just beneath a slightly opaque surface.

While I struggled with this, Alice said, "It's just like what Eleazar was telling us. It's her other gift."

"But Eleazar didn't say she could tell the future," Emmett said. "How would she know what Tanya's family's going to do a month from now?"

"No, no," I said, frustrated at my own confusion, "Not in the future. it's because they're doing it _now_. They started looking while we were still there, in Alaska."

"Looking for a house?" Esme asked.

"Yes."

"Did they tell you that?"

"No, I just...know it."

Carlisle asked eagerly, "Can you explain, in any way, _how_ you know, Bella? If this is your gift, it would be interesting to follow its development."

"I can almost see, but not quite." I shook my head. "It's almost like dreams I had when I was human, full of connections that disappeared when I woke up. But it's not a dream - it's just everything coming together and telling me...something."

"What is coming together?"

"I don't know." I shrugged apologetically.

"It's all right, dear," Esme said. "I'm sure it will become clearer in time."

Carlisle thought a moment, then returned to the house, coming back out with his cell phone in his hand. He hit a number and waited. "Carmen? Hello, how are you all?" I could easily hear Carmen ask after 'the newlyweds.' He smiled and answered, "They're both extremely well. Bella is adapting beyond our expectations. I'll be happy to tell you more later. I was calling to ask if you could confirm a rumour."

"What rumour is that?" Carmen's voice asked.

"We've just heard that you're looking for real estate in our immediate area. That you'll be moving here in the next month or so."

There was a silence. "May I ask where you heard that? Not that it's a secret - we were going to tell you as soon as we'd narrowed down the time - but I can't imagine who else would know about it."

"Bella told us."

"Really? That's odd. I didn't think anyone had said a word. In fact, we didn't arrive at that decision until after your departure - not for certain, at least."

"Bella says she wasn't told. She just knew."

"Oh!"

"I thought Eleazar might be interested."

"He would indeed! Just a moment, I'll put him on."

Eleazar's voice came through the phone. "Carlisle? You say she told you we were moving there, but has no explanation of how she obtained the knowledge?"

"That's right."

Eleazar asked a series of questions, all leading to more or less the same dead end: "She doesn't know how she comes by the information, not yet."

"Not surprising. It's still very new. I'm sure you're keeping track of this as it develops."

"Certainly."

They exchanged news, and Carlisle briefly described my progress over the past week - resulting in expressions of surprise from the other end of the line - before signing off. Carlisle turned and looked at me. "Interesting."

"Wow! Bella sees all!" Emmett laughed. "Do me next, Bella! Give us some hidden information about me! Tell us what you know."

"I know you're a big goof," I said, "but that's not exactly hidden information." He laughed uproariously.

Carlisle ignored this. "Bella, if you have any more, er, premonitions of this kind, or any further insight into how you come to know these things, I would appreciate it if you would mention it."

"Sure," I mumbled.

Jasper chuckled. "You don't like the idea of talking about yourself," he said, correctly reading my reaction, "but the gifts of family members are important to the well being of the family in general. Besides, Carlisle and Eleazar both love research on any new subject; it would please them very much to have your co-operation."

"Of course," I said more distinctly. "I'll let you know, Carlisle."

I went into the house to use the computer, having first made sure it was all right to discuss my current situation openly with Rachel. I hadn't been in touch with her since soon after the plane crash, and although she knew I hadn't been killed in the accident, she also hadn't been updated since then. I was advised not to use my old email address, and I opened a new one under the name Donna Stevens, using the email ID _belladonna._ My subject line read _Your Friend: Revised Edition_.

_Hi Rachel,_  
_I hope this doesn't get lost in your spam file. Please use this email address for me from now on. I'm Donna Stevens for the time being, but you can call me whatever you like. _  
_The big news is, I'm fine but have gone through with my plans and now I look a little bit different. I've been taking some time getting used to the change, which does require some work, but things fell into place quickly and now I'm doing very well. I'm here in New England with the family, and they set up a nice cottage for E and me at the far end of the property. I'm so happy, I don't even know how to tell you._  
_I hope you can still keep in touch, and that it doesn't cause any hard feelings with Paul or your family. Please tell them all hi from me. _  
_Your friend, 'Donna'_

Edward proposed making a visit to the garage so he could finally present me with my wedding gift. The entire family accompanied us, and I reminded myself to accept the car graciously and with as much enthusiasm as I could muster. I'd need a car anyway, at some point. My pickup truck had been left back in Forks after my death, and Charlie had donated it to charity. I felt a twinge of pain at the memory of Charlie, and put it away again, in one of the countless little rooms my brain now contained.

Edward stepped to the far side of a large, sheet-covered lump parked in a corner of the garage. "Ready?" I nodded. He whisked the sheet away.

I stared at the car he'd revealed. "What _is_ that?" I asked. It didn't look like any car I was familiar with. "It's so...cute!" I wasn't feigning enthusiasm. The car was weirdly adorable.

Edward laughed, pleased. "It's a 1953 Ferrari." He went on to provide details of the model and its history, and of the engine's specifications, which didn't mean a great deal to me. I was admiring my car. It was a funny, bolster shaped two-seater convertible with tiny, round headlights like a pair of nerdy eyeglasses. Its glossy finish was a light sky blue. It was sleek and simple, with only the wire rims and butter yellow leather seats providing any decorative details. I walked around the car to observe it from all sides. "I thought you'd prefer a classic car to a newer model."

"I love it." I threw my arms around his neck. "It's perfect. Thank you!"

Although I wasn't yet able to take the car out in public, I took a short test drive around the Cullen property, Edward in the passenger seat, looking delighted that his gift had been so successful.

We spent the rest of the afternoon with the family, tending the garden and doing some minor repairs on the exterior of the house. It was amazing how much fun work was when you couldn't get tired, and could easily think about many other things at the same time. I was finally able to keep track of multiple conversations at once, as the Cullens always had.

I enjoyed the time with my family, but once the sun had fully set, I encountered the same electric reaction between Edward and me that always seemed to come with darkness. I was eager to return to the privacy of our renovated barn, but didn't want to disrupt the sociable mood. Edward finally took the first step, simply taking my hand and asking, "Shall we go?" I nodded. "Goodnight, everyone."

"Goodnight," I echoed.

Emmett gave us a knowing grin as he waved us away, but otherwise nothing was said. Apparently we could come and go as we pleased.

We ran at top speed back to our cottage, not taking the trouble to preserve our clothing this time. It had been hours.

With privacy always available, we found we could separate long enough to look in on the rest of the family on a regular basis. We usually managed to get dressed and make a visit every forty-eight hours or so, during daylight hours. Every few days I would hunt before returning to the cottage with Edward to make love, and talk a while, and make love some more. It was a highly satisfactory routine.

I received a message back from Rachel after a few days, telling me 'congratulations, if that's the right thing to say in these circumstances' and assuring me there were no hard feelings as far as she was concerned. She didn't mention how Paul or the others felt about it.

She also forwarded a couple of news items, without comment. The reserve had been involved in some dispute over their land, and there was concern that they might lose control over First Beach, due to some federal official siding with lobby groups. Before the decision was made, however, the official suddenly had what was described as an emotional breakdown. He claimed to have been confronted by a gigantic wolf, late at night in the parking lot of his country club. Days later, he summoned the police to his home, ranting about yet another wolf and an unknown Native man who had turned up at the official's house, naked, and attempted to coerce his decision regarding the Quileute reserve. The police could find no sign of any forced entry, just some odd, irregular furrows in the lawn of the man's back yard. The official was advised to receive counselling for job-related stress, and shortly thereafter, he resigned and accepted a post in a different branch of the government.

The official's replacement never complained publicly of giant wolves or mysterious naked visitors, but he did make an unexpected reversal of his predecessor's intended course of action. In addition, the special interest groups involved in the matter suddenly indicated that they had changed their minds, and issued a voluntary press release eloquently defending Native land rights. The matter ended there. "Interesting approach," Jasper commented, when I told the family about the incident.

"To say the least," Edward agreed. "It seems the werewolves also protect their people from enemies other than vampires."

"When you have an ancestral homeland that includes oceanfront property," Alice said darkly, "_everybody'_s a potential enemy."

The junior Cullens began attending classes at Dartmouth and at Franklin Pierce, and some of the conversation revolved around their studies. I asked a lot of questions about the college experience, in anticipation of my own turn at college, some time in the future.

"I'm sorry you didn't get the opportunity to attend this time, Bella," Esme said.

I shrugged. "I'll get my chance."

My former birthday passed by unnoticed, apart from Edward's remarking that I'd be nineteen today if circumstances had been different. In late September, Carlisle started taking the night shift at the hospital where he'd been placed, as emergency room physician and on-call surgeon. Between the schedule, the hospital's limited budget, its largely low-income clientele, and the necessity of filling two jobs for the price of one, there was little real competition for the position; Carlisle was chosen without difficulty. In fact, it was just the kind of placement he preferred, one where he could do some genuine good.

By early October, Tanya's family had purchased, sight unseen, a five bedroom ski lodge on a thousand acres in northeastern Vermont, a very convenient distance from us. Technically the house was purchased in the name of married couple Isaac and Eva Benadi, the new identity of Carmen and Eleazar; Esme offered to go by and size the place up, once the Denali had finalized the deal. She reported that the house was in exemplary condition apart from a few cosmetic details, and offered to give the place a sprucing up before its new owners arrived.

Edward and I arrived at the house one day early in the morning, just after Carlisle arrived home from the hospital. Everyone was just leaving for Vermont to do a little work with Esme, whose sprucing up had expanded to include some fairly extensive work. "Can we come along?" I asked.

There was a short silence, during which everyone looked at each other, seeming to assess the situation. "Bella," Edward said, "we'd have to travel right through populated areas. You haven't been close to humans so far."

"Oh! Right. I understand."

"She might be okay, though," Emmett said. "Look at how well she's handled herself so far."

"True," Carlisle said thoughtfully. "Although we don't want to take unnecessary chances."

I wasn't sure what to say. I'd caught the scent of humans from a great distance, and although the smell was highly appealing, I felt like I could handle it. Still, they probably knew better than I did.

"What if we all travel with her the first time?" Jasper said. "All of us together could stop her if she gets out of control."

"What do you think, Bella?" Carlisle asked.

"I'd like to try, but I'm going to go with whatever you guys think is safest. I don't want to risk hurting anybody."

"Let's give her a try," Rosalie urged.

I was instructed to remain inside the circle of people, surrounded at all times. If I smelled human beings, I should hold my breath and run from the area. If I lost control, the family would stop me. I nodded nervously.

We started out, running at full speed, something I always enjoyed. When we passed close to towns, the smell became quite magnetic, causing a clenching of the muscles, a pooling of venom in my mouth, a powerful urge to run in the direction of the scent. I was able to pass it by, however, and keep running without even a moment's hesitation. "You're fantastic, Bella!" Alice cheered me on as we ran. I realized it was true. It wasn't enough that I was now strong, beautiful, graceful and intelligent. By some inexplicable chance I was also multiply gifted, abnormally quick to adapt, impossibly controlled. I had gone from a lifetime of being thoroughly mediocre to suddenly being a star among stars. I was warming to the experience of being uncommonly good at everything I tried.


	15. Ring In The New

The new place was gorgeous, with the same open concept ground floor and vaulted ceilings as their Alaskan house, but with a less rugged exterior, not to mention bigger bedrooms. Esme had ordered in replacement windows, interior doors, some Craftsman style decorative hardware, and a few other odds and ends, and we divided the work among us. I helped Edward install some of the doors, then took on the job of adjusting and re-attaching the eavestroughs, leaping onto the roof and working from there. I was kneeling on the rooftop when a pair of rental cars were seen coming up the long, winding drive leading to the house.

The Cullens prepared to hustle me out of the way, but Edward held up a hand to stop them. "It's them," Edward said. "Tanya's family. They must have just driven in from the airport." I relaxed and set about finishing my work as the cars pulled in beside the house. Tanya and her sisters emerged from one vehicle, Carmen and Eleazar from the other. I inhaled their scents, unfamiliar to my new senses, and recognized the element that identified them as vampires. I inhaled once more, establishing the distinctive scent of each individual. It was like being reintroduced.

"Hello, cousins!" Tanya called out. "Hard at work, I see."

"Hello!" Esme came forward, smiling, holding a can of chimney sealant in one hand. "We didn't expect you for another few days. Your movers haven't come yet."

"I know." Tanya smiled a greeting at everyone. "We thought we'd come ahead, make sure they unpack everything properly."

"Thank you for taking care of all this," Kate said.

"It's our pleasure," Esme told her. "It's such a beautiful house."

"And we're glad to have you close by again," Carlisle added.

They were about to enter the house and look around when Irina asked, "Where's Bella? You didn't leave her at home alone, did you? Good heavens, she's only a few weeks old!"

"No, no," Carlisle assured her, turning to look up at the roof.

"Oh! _That's_ the unfamiliar scent," Irina said. "I should have realized." I took the hint and jumped down to say hello.

"You brought her with you?" Eleazar asked. "Is that wise? You must have passed close to residential areas."

"We did," Esme said, smiling at me. "Carlisle told you Bella was adapting well, but you haven't yet seen just how well."

"She's hardly like a newborn at all," Emmett said, sounding a little disappointed.

That required another rehashing of all that had happened since my change. The Cullens related the details while we helped unload the cars and bring the Denali's essentials into the house. It involved being stared at again, and I was glad when the recounting was over with. We brought in the luggage from the two cars and went inside so the cousins could get a first look at their home. They ran through the house, planning decor and comparing notes, and finally distributed the bedrooms to everyone's satisfaction. We ended up in the big central living space, catching up on news.

"We went to the city on Saturday night, before we left," Kate said, "and I had four different women ask me what happened to our tall, blond friend, the one who did the Elvis number." She smirked at Jasper.

"No talent scouts?" he joked. "I keep hoping to be offered a recording contract."

"Your talent loses impact outside of live performances," Alice reminded him.

"Very true," he laughed.

"We'll have to have another night out some time, now that we're living close by again," Tanya suggested.

"Speaking of the new location," Alice asked Tanya, "what's the arrangement? Are you still an arty bohemian free-love collective here in Vermont, or is there a new cover story?"

"We're sticking with the same general story, under new names," Tanya answered. "It seemed to work for us."

"What I'd like to know," Irina said, "is how Bella knew we were looking for a house in the area."

"Yes, I'm intrigued by that as well," Eleazar said. "Any progress on that front, Bella?"

"Kind of. I remembered some of the things that made it come together." He gestured for me to proceed. "Well...first of all, Tanya mentioned that she had liked living fairly close to our family. Then Irina brought all the finished paintings she had and sold them to that little gallery in Anchorage. And close to the end of our visit, Carmen did the same thing with _her_ paintings." Eleazar frowned, looking confused. "Then one day, in the city, Tanya was passing a rack full of those real estate booklets. She just looked at it in passing at first, then she paused for just a second and took another look. And one day Kate was checking the weather report on TV and seemed to pay more attention than usual to the weather from other regions, especially to the east."

"And then..." I went on, naming more and more minor details. The way Kate had looked at the underside of a table, the presence of a pink sales receipt in Irina's purse, the fact that Carmen had begun parting her hair on the left instead of the right, Eleazar's shirt cuff, Tanya's left sock, the welcome mat at the front door, the small scratch on the kitchen tiles, the presence of a Hank Williams CD lying beside the CD player but _not_ inside it - these things, and many, many more, had all come together to bring me to the certainty that Tanya's family were moving to New England.

They were all staring at me blankly. I started putting the pieces together for them, explaining the connections, then stopped. "There's an awful lot of small details involved, but I hope you get the idea. All kinds of tiny little clues leading to the same thing. That's how I knew they were moving here."

"My dear," Eleazar said, "very few of those things would be considered clues by even the most astute witness. But I understand: that is how your gift of perception works."

"I see it!" Alice said. "Bella's like Sherlock Holmes."

I raised an eyebrow at her. "Yeah, I get that all the time."

She laughed. "No, what I mean is, Holmes told Watson that he sees and hears the same things everybody else does; he just puts those facts together and understands where they lead, what they imply. That's what Bella's gift does, only on a grander scale. We all knew as much about Victoria and the newborns as Bella did - knew a lot more, actually - but we didn't see how it all connected. Bella sees the connections."

"You're quite right," Eleazar confirmed. "Her insight comes not from any kind of second sight, in the manner of Alice's precognition, but from a supernormal ability to extrapolate."

"Fascinating," Carlisle said.

"Elementary," I muttered, and they all laughed. "But it still seems to be out of my control. I'm not even aware that I'm doing it. I told everyone you were moving here before I thought about how I knew that."

"Give it time," Edward said. "It may become clearer."

The moving van arrived two days later, and we returned to the house to help arrange things. I realized this was more of a social than a practical offer; arranging the house would be no real effort for the five of them. The place was organized quickly, and we gathered to talk.

"This was called Snowflake Lodge by the previous owners," Tanya said. "I don't much care for the name." Emmett dubbed it Bohemian Manor, and although we took it as a joke, the name stuck.

"We'll also have to stop referring to you as the Denali Coven," Rosalie said, "now that you're no longer in Alaska. I guess you're the Vermont Coven now."

"The Eastern Seaboarders," Emmett suggested. "The Maple Syrup..."

"Vermont Coven will do fine," Tanya said. "It's certainly not already been taken. Vermont is surprisingly free of vampires."

"They should use that for tourism purposes," Alice said. She read from an imaginary travel poster. "'Beautiful scenery, great skiing, and a virtually vampire-free environment! Come to Vermont!'." I giggled. "Ooh, Bella! I bet you've never tried skiing before."

"Do you even have to ask?"

She laughed. "No, it would have been a big mistake - before. But maybe now you can join us some time."

"Sure." It still seemed counterintuitive to assume I could do something like ski, but I knew things were different now. I grinned over at Edward, who was quietly playing _State Street Special_ on the electronic piano in the far corner, and he smiled back, understanding.

The conversation broke up into sub-groups, as usual. I joined Rosalie and Jasper, who were talking about genetic modification, something that had come up in a classroom discussion at Dartmouth, while listening in on Esme and Irina discussing poetry. At one point, I became aware that Eleazar and Carlisle were talking about me - strategizing the best way to help me develop my special talents. When my own discussion started to drift, Eleazar gestured to me to join them.

"I'm afraid we're making plans for you, Bella," he said. "You'll have to forgive me for being a little overeager. Gifts such as yours have been my field for a long time, but of course, it's not mine to oversee."

"That's okay," I told him. "I'd like to work on it, especially if it might be useful to the family."

Kate overheard. "Can I test Bella's shield?" Edward stopped playing the piano and looked at her in alarm. "Relax, Edward. I'm only going to use a tiny little spark."

"Spark?" I asked, mystified.

"We never did tell you about Kate's gift, did we?" Tanya asked. "She's our little electric eel. She can give people a shock that knocks them flat for a few seconds."

"Except that there is no actual electricity involved," Eleazar said. "Her weapon acts on the mind, like the weapons of many of the Volturi guard."

"So you want to know if it works on me?" I asked. "That's okay, I guess."

Edward joined us, standing nervously at my shoulder. "A very minimal shock, Kate," he reminded her.

She rolled her eyes. "I'm not out to hurt our cousin, Edward. Ready, Bella?" I nodded, and she placed her palm against my arm. I looked up at her, waiting. She removed her hand, then placed it further down my forearm, frowning. Edward started to smile.

"Were you doing it?" I asked. Everyone laughed.

"It seems we have our answer," Carlisle said.

I was given a preliminary regimen intended to expand my gifts. Hunting and being alone with Edward still took up much of my time, but during the daylight hours we would always make a point of spending time with the family - and sometimes the Vermont branch of the family as well - and work on developing my abilities.

The first stage took the longest. I had to figure out how to find what Eleazar called my shield, to access it and learn to manipulate it. "Your gift doesn't have to be activated," Eleazar told me. "It shields you as its default position, so to speak. That makes the shield stronger, but also harder for you to isolate. Having a shield has been a passive experience so far."

"What would it feel like, if I did find it?"

He pondered a moment. "Among those who have gifts of this kind - none as comprehensive as yours, in my experience - progress was made when they pictured their shield as a tangible object, and attempted to visualize employing it in the way they desired. Once they had begun to control it, it quickly became second nature. It is part of yourself, after all. You are learning to use it, as an infant learns to control its hands and feet."

"Okay. What should I try and make it do?"

"The simplest exercise would be to extend your shield to another person."

I nodded. "How would I know when I've done it?"

"Simple enough, with your husband present. He could tell you when he ceased to hear the thoughts of the second person."

"Oh, I see!"

I was fairly confident that I would be able to master this in short order, but I was disappointed. Although I worked on it most days, I was never able to really get a handle on where this shield of mine was or how I was supposed to use my mind to control it. It felt as if I were trying to push the air around with my thoughts, which made me feel a little silly. It was the first thing I'd attempted since my change that I hadn't mastered immediately; I tried not to take the setback personally.

It was mid November before I saw any results. Following Eleazar's instructions, I tried to visualize a literal shield, in the form of a suit of armour, as a barbed wire fence, and finally as a protective bubble. The last image, that of a bubble, seemed to strike a chord somehow. I started picturing myself expanding the bubble, pushing it away from myself. Something felt different. It seemed as if I were doing more than imagining it; as if some part of my mind was working, like a muscle that had lain dormant my entire life and was now being used for the first time. I tried to identify it, to figure out how to flex that muscle. It seemed to be working, but I couldn't tell for sure.

I was hanging out with Alice one afternoon, after trying on some new outfits she'd bought for me in Manchester and admiring those she'd bought for the others. Edward was at his piano working on a new composition, Rosalie and Emmett were on campus attending a lecture, the others talking or reading. I started experimenting with expanding my shield, in the same way I'd done before. I was focused on Alice, who was speaking to me at the time. Suddenly, Edward broke off in the middle of a piece of music. "Alice?" he said uncertainly.

She turned to him. "What's wrong?"

"I'm not sure. You were telling me something, and you stopped short."

"You were telling him?" I repeated. "But you were talking to me just now."

"I was thinking something at Edward," she explained. "Just telling him he should get new shoes."

"Yes," Edward agreed, "but you broke off in the middle of a sentence."

"No, I didn't," she said, frowning.

My eyes widened with excitement. "Alice, would you think something, please? Just for a minute." She shrugged. I focused hard on repeating the kind of mental movement that had worked before. It felt as if I were reaching out with part of my mind, like stretching out my arm, except that it was an arm I wasn't accustomed to using, one that was awkward and hard to control. I concentrated harder, moving the imaginary bubble outward until it enveloped Alice.

Edward stood up, watching Alice. "Did it happen again?" I asked him. My voice sounded strained with the effort of moving the invisible limb I'd just discovered.

"Yes! Is that you?" He crossed the floor to join us just as I lost my grip and the shield slid back into place. "I can hear her again."

Carlisle, Esme and Jasper left their own activities to join us. "I think maybe I've got it at last."

I worked on it over the next hour or so, and although progress was slow and gradual, my ability to move my shield improved steadily. I continued to test my ability on a daily basis; now that I knew what my shield felt like and had the experience of moving it, expanding the skill was much easier. In time, it became virtually effortless, and I could spread my shield over others as easily as looking at them. At Eleazar's suggestion, I began to experiment, shielding one person at a time, large groups, people in motion. When I shielded Edward, he was still able to hear the thoughts of those outside the shield, telling us that the protection worked like a two way mirror.

By Christmas, my eyes had lightened to a reddish amber, and my ability to use my shield had developed admirably. I was able to hunt only a little more often than the rest of the Cullens, and my tendency to be easily distracted, the only newborn trait I'd really demonstrated to any extent, had vanished. I was still unable to keep my hands off Edward for more than the few daylight hours we devoted to family time, but I didn't think that was a newborn thing so much as a newlywed thing, since Edward was exactly the same way.

Tanya's family invited us to spend Christmas with them, and we arrived in the morning to help them decorate their tree, a twelve foot tall fir they'd cut down on their own property and set up in the centre of the living space, on top of an old braided rug. It was pretty Norman Rockwell for a bohemian commune.

There were no gifts under the tree. Esme had explained that the family gave up exchanging gifts for occasions like this long ago. With unlimited time, everyone would amass an endless number of articles they would be reluctant to leave behind due to sentimental associations, but unable to constantly carry with them at every move. Married couples did sometimes exchange Christmas gifts, as they saw fit, but there was no expectation of presents. I'd given Edward a pair of carved gold cufflinks I'd found in an antique shop in Anchorage, during one of my ladies-only shopping trips. Edward had presented me with another piece of jewelry from his mother's collection, an Art Nouveau moonstone and pearl necklace that made dressing up almost imperative. Dressing up for holiday celebrations was a family custom anyway, Alice had informed me.

We ran through the snowy hills to Bohemian Lodge carrying our garment bags, and on arrival were met by a formally dressed Kate, who pointed us to the upstairs bedrooms. Alice pulled Esme's hair into a chignon with a sprig of holly pinned to it, then arranged mine to cascade over one shoulder. I put on the flowing pink, off-the-shoulder gown Alice had chosen for me. I felt a little uncertain about it at first, but my reflection in the mirror was reassuring. As human Bella it might not have worked, but in my new form, I could totally rock a baby pink formal gown. I put on my new necklace and watched as Esme finished dressing Rosalie's hair and slipped on a deep red, cowl neck dress that fit her like a second skin. "Esme, you look fantastic!" I said. "Well, you all do."

"You too, Bella," Alice said, handing me a pair of high heeled pumps. I slipped them on without a word. I had no trouble walking in heels any more.

All the women were in formal gowns, the men in black tie. I had thought it was weird to go to such lengths for a family occasion, but Rosalie told me, "We don't attend very many social gatherings, human ones. The prom we went to with you and Edward was a rare exception. Our social life revolves around our two families, so we have to make our own special occasions."

With no Christmas dinner as the central focus, the day was all about sociable fun. First we trimmed the tree together, producing a very nice, if slightly gaudy, effect. We played guessing games, simple games but made complex by the necessity of outsmarting a mind reader, a fortune teller, and an empath. They'd forgotten about a fourth potential obstacle: my Holmesian deductive ability. When it was my turn to be 'it,' I caused a major upset in the third round by guessing almost immediately, and apparently out of the blue, that the group secret was a morbid fear of cats.

From there, we moved on to music. Edward sat at the piano and we sang together, alternating traditional Christmas carols with whatever anyone wanted to suggest, ranging from show tunes to medieval folk songs, Gilbert & Sullivan to The Grateful Dead. I sang along when I knew the words, sat and listened when I didn't, memorizing the lyrics for the next time.

We moved on from singing to dancing. Edward played a waltz, and the married people formed couples and glided across the hardwood floor while the three sisters linked hands and danced in a circle, looking like fairies in a slightly adult version of Midsummer Night's Dream. Halfway through one of the waltzes, Tanya ran to where I sat beside Edward on the piano bench and pulled me into their fairy ring.

With each new piece of music, everyone changed partners, continuing to whirl lightly around the room with the perfect grace that had once amazed me, and which I now shared. I waltzed with Carlisle, then was led through an extremely lively polka by Emmett, and even managed to follow Jasper through a quadrille. I had been shown basic dance steps by the family during one of our visits, and found that dancing, once beyond me, was now yet another thing I could excel at effortlessly.

In fact, I now adored dancing like the rest, and I thought I understood why they loved it so much. We could leap over buildings and run at incredible speeds, but dancing offered a different challenge, requiring us to keep pace with the music and make our movements perfectly graceful and expressive, rather than hard or fast. It was like a poet who often wrote fifty stanza ballads trying to express himself within the confines of the three line haiku.

Eventually, Rosalie took over at the piano, and I was able to dance with Edward, following his every move with precision and grace. "Quite a difference from the last time you danced with me, isn't it?" I asked, laughing up at him.

"The last time was on our wedding day," he said. "You were perfection to me, as you are now. But I'm happy you're able to enjoy it more than you used to."

Esme had told me that dancing at one of their gatherings could go on around the clock, and we did continue, untiring, for nearly three hours. At that point it began to snow heavily again, and by common agreement we all kicked off our shoes and went outside in our finery to run through the fresh snow, and in some cases directly over the surface of it. Emmett initiated a snowball fight, and soon icy missiles were flying back and forth faster than bullets from a machine gun. Edward, Alice and I formed a team and vanquished the others with a combination of greater speed and advance warning of all attacks.

Tanya broke away from the group and started constructing a gigantic snowman. Esme and I ran over to help, finishing off the task by having Esme stand on Tanya's shoulders, and me on Esme's, to lift the immense snow head on to the top. Tanya leapt up to place stones on the snowman's face for eyes and mouth, and a piece of tree bark for a nose, and I added a length of bristly pine twig for a moustache. Kate ran back to the house to fetch a woollen hat to place on top, and our snowman was complete. Alice celebrated by throwing herself into a patch of undisturbed snow and making snow angels. I followed her example, and finally most of the others did the same, laughing and jokingly competing over best angel.

We brushed the snow from our clothes and returned to the house for more singing, then Tanya turned on the stereo and we moved on from ballroom dancing to more modern, free-form verieties. I was good at them all.

At sunset we took a break from dancing, not from fatigue but just for a change, and talked a while. I asked about how they had spent Christmas in the past, and was treated to anecdotes about previous holidays, stretching back many years - in some cases, many centuries.

"I virtually ignored holidays when I was on my own," Carlisle recalled. "When Edward joined me, I began to observe them in an attempt to make him feel less cut off from his human life, but there was very little in the way of celebration. It was only after Esme came that we began to celebrate Christmas genuinely, as a family. She civilized both of us," he laughed.

"We didn't observe holidays either, before we met Carlisle's family," Tanya said. "We saw it as a human practice that no longer applied to us. Our lives have changed to some extent since we met our cousins."

Dancing reconvened and continued on into the night, until Edward caught my eye an hour or so before dawn, and glanced meaningfully at the door. I smiled at him and moved to join him as soon as my dance ended. As much as I'd enjoyed the party, I was more than ready for some private time with my husband.

"Goodnight," he called out as we left. "Merry Christmas!"

"Thank you for the wonderful party," I added, giving Tanya a goodbye hug. "Merry Christmas, everybody."

"Newlyweds," I heart Kate complain good-naturedly as we ran away and into the forest. "They always ditch the party early."

New Year's Eve was at the same time more formal and more lively than our Christmas celebration. The Cullens were hosts this time, and Alice pushed for a masked ball. A compromise was eventually reached, with Alice toning down her vision of the evening just a little: we were to dress in our most absolutely formal and elegant best, men and women alike, and encouraged to use historical period dress as our inspiration. Everyone took this as a creative challenge. For weeks prior, there was a fair amount of sneaking items in and out of bedrooms, a lot of work being done behind closed doors. Alice took on the production of my dress for the night as well as her own, and provided me with a medieval robe of gold and sage green, with a jewelled cap to go with it. She convinced me everyone's clothing would be over the top, and that I wouldn't stand out. Her own dress, a handmade Alice original, was a replica of a pleated Fortuny gown from 1920, complete with feathered headband over slicked down hair. She looked edgy and fabulous.

We gathered in the living room to await our guests and compare costumes, minutes before the cousins arrived and added to the carnival atmosphere. It was hard to choose a favourite outfit.  
Edward and Eleazar both wore flawless white tie, which never looks wrong. "You look breathtaking," he whispered to me as I came down the stairs in my old school gown.

"So do you," I told him in all sincerity.

Jasper had on what seemed to be a pirate captain's gear, finished off with a satin-lined cape. Emmett dressed the part of a Victorian dandy in a plum velvet coat over black silk trousers, custom made for him by Rosalie, and Rosalie herself wore a black velvet gown with a train, long kid gloves, and a king's ransom in diamonds.  
The three sisters had really made an effort, especially Kate, who had designed a kind of battle maiden costume complete with a bronze helmet.  
Esme had designed an elaborate, Shogun-era silk kimono and done her hair up geisha style, with little glittering ornaments placed through it, and Carlisle, uncharacteristically showy, had worn an historically accurate suit from the early seventeenth century, made of peacock-coloured satin with gold trim.

We were one fine looking group of party goers.

In honour of the party's theme, we started the evening with a series of formal set dances common in the eighteenth century. If anybody had ever told me I'd one day spend New Year's Eve dancing the minuet at a masked ball - and enjoying it - I would not have believed them. Soon, however, the party began to devolve into something more familiar and informal, and by eleven-thirty the group was alternating between chatting and joking together in twos and threes around the periphery of the room, and moving around the floor to Eighties dance hits. At one point Alice showed me how to dance the Charleston, and Esme put on appropriate Roaring Twenties music so we could all give it a try.

Midnight struck, and everyone stopped what they were doing to call out 'happy new year' to the others. The couples embraced, and Edward crossed the room to pull me into his arms and kiss me. "Happy new year, my love."

I smiled as I moved into his arms. "It will be," I said with perfect confidence.


	16. Progress

As the new year wore on, my red eyes finally faded to the same soft amber as the rest of my family's. There was some discussion of when I might be able to go out in public, among humans. I was reluctant to try, still fearful of losing control and killing someone. I travelled freely through the woods when hunting, or when running around with Edward for fun, but never ventured close to any human population centres.

In February, Edward and I were invited to come along with Tanya and Carmen on a short hunt in a state park west of their lodge in Vermont, one I hadn't visited before. Emmett asked to join us, and the five of us set out at a run, reaching the park mid morning. We moved up the ridge of high land running through the centre of the wood, away from campgrounds and hiking trails, and I began to cast around for a promising scent. I picked up on the now-familiar odour of white tailed deer - the area had an _awful_ lot of deer - and let my body fall into a smooth, stalking gait, giving myself up to the hunt, allowing the scent to pull me along.

As my hunting instincts came to the fore and led me, I suddenly stopped dead in my tracks, my eyes wide, inhaling rapidly in little gusts, my whole body taut and alert, as a new and electrifying scent struck me. At first I didn't recognize it, didn't give a name to it. All I knew was the pooling of venom in my mouth, the clenching of muscles as they poised to launch me forward, the scent that seemed to fill my mind with the one relentless message of _drink drink drink drink drink drink_... It was impossibly sweet, insanely desirable. The scent seemed to call me, offer itself to me, beg me to come and take it.

At the same moment I perceived this scent and reacted to it, the others reacted as well.

"Humans," Carmen said, clenching her teeth and growling with the effort of stopping short as she hunted. "Not just humans; there's blood."

"Bella," Tanya said, sounding alarmed.

"Bella, you need to..." Edward began, but I was already deciding, reacting. I stopped breathing. The luscious scent seemed to call me to indulge in a sweetness that was mine to take, that gave itself freely to me, an innocent and perfect pleasure - but that was a lie. In reality, the scent was calling me to kill an innocent human, some hiker who had, perhaps, fallen on the trail and scraped his hand, as I had done so many times when I was human. I forced the alluring message of the blood out of my mind. "I have to run," I said with the small amount of air remaining in my lungs, and took off, as fast as I could make myself go, moving south along the ridge of high land, away from the scent of blood.

I became aware that the others were following me. "Bella," I heard Tanya say from a few feet behind me, "you can stop now. We're out of range."

I stopped running, and cautiously drew in a shallow breath; then a deeper one. There was no trace of blood in the air. "Thank you." I looked around at the four of them. "So _that_ was human blood."

Tanya and Carmen looked at each other. They seemed at a loss, for some reason. "Yes," Carmen said. "You ran away from it."

"Well...sure I did. Wasn't I supposed to?" Emmett burst out laughing. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing is funny, love," Edward assured me. "We're just rather surprised."

"Newborns don't smell fresh blood in mid-hunt, and just turn and run away from it!" Emmett told me. "At least, no newborns except you, little sister."

"Oh." I thought this over. "I'm so glad I _did_ run away. Would you have been able to stop me?"

"Probably," Tanya said, "but it's not absolutely certain. You're strong, and fast."

I nodded. "Close call," I said. It was a relief to know I could avoid harming anyone, even under duress.

The story of my hunting incident was reported back to the others. Based on my reaction, the family decided I was fit to go near humans. I first tried a couple of cautious trial runs, moving close to the nearest population centre in the company of others; then even closer; then walking right through the middle of a small town; and finally wandering through a suburban neighbourhood for some thirty minutes. There was no trouble, no close calls. The scent of humans was attractive, and my throat burned with thirst, but I felt under control. My encounter with the hiker had shown me what to expect in a worst-case scenario, and how to overcome it, and I became confident that I could be safe even in a crowd. I was given the green light to come and go as I pleased, including into towns and cities. I didn't go there alone, not yet, but my time in quarantine was coming to an end.

"I don't understand it," Jasper said one day. "I've never seen a newborn react to blood by running away. I would have said it was impossible. But Eleazar tells us it's not a gift."

Edward looked at me with obvious pride. His pleasure at my success made all the attention easier to take.

"I believe it must be the instruction she was given before her transformation," Carlisle said. "She knew what to expect."

"I had all of you to help me, too," I said. "I can't imagine ever managing it on my own, like Carlisle did."

"I guess that puts Bella in first place as far as control," Emmett said.

Carlisle shook his head in mild reproof. "Emmett, not everything is a competition."

Emmett shrugged. "Since when?" Carlisle laughed in spite of himself.

"Anyway," I said, "if it _were_ a competition, wouldn't Jasper be in first place?"

"Bella!" Alice exclaimed, putting her hands on her hips and glaring at me reproachfully. "That's not funny!"

I looked at her in surprise. "I wasn't joking!"

"Then I'm not sure why you would say that," Jasper said evenly. "I struggle with this more than anyone in the family, as you're well aware. And I'm sure I don't have to remind you that I've had at least one recent lapse."

"I know, but...maybe I'm mistaken, but don't you feel thirst from the rest of us, the same way you feel our emotions?"

"I do," he said, frowning.

"Then you've remained a vegetarian for years, even while you're feeling six times the thirst the rest of us do. You sat, day after day, in that cafeteria at Forks High School with four other vampires beside you, coping with their thirst along with your own."

There was a long silence. Jasper finally said, "I never thought of it as part of my own efforts to control my thirst. The thirst belonged to someone else. But...I suppose there's something in what you say."

I nodded. "And when you came at me, that one time, you were feeling everyone's reaction to my blood - including Edward's. We know how, er, special the scent of my blood was to him. He barely managed to leave me alive, that first day, even without any blood flowing. You had to feel his response, _and_ the others' reaction to the blood, _and_ your own thirst, all at once."

Everyone was staring at Jasper now. "I could see you always had to be careful around me, when I was human. But you had much less trouble with my scent the one time we were together but Edward wasn't there - when you and Alice took me to Phoenix. Didn't you?" He looked back at me, nodding thoughtfully.

"Jasper isn't the weak link," I concluded, "he's probably the strongest of any of us."

"You make a very good point, Bella," Carlisle said. "We may have been gravely underestimating our Jasper."

"And hindering when we meant to help," Esme added, "by always accompanying him when he was around humans."

Jasper shrugged, seeming deep in thought.

"You've helped Jasper a great deal," Edward told me a few days later, when we were alone.

"Have I?"

"Yes. He'd been rather demoralized over his supposed weakness, the fact that his control was so sporadic. You gave him a new perspective. He's been thinking over past occasions when his resistance was especially fragile, and he now realizes it was when he was with the rest of us, particularly when we hadn't hunted recently. And your observation about the trip to Phoenix convinced him. He hadn't made the connection before." He smiled at me. "But making connections is one of your gifts."

"I hope it helped. I owed him one."

I continued to experiment, cautiously, with being around humans, gradually getting in closer proximity and approaching larger groups of them at a time. One day, when I'd again expressed curiosity about the others' college experiences, Emmett proposed a campus tour. "It'll be a good chance to give yourself a test drive," he said.

"What if I'm not ready?" I worried. "It might be risky."

"Limit your tour to the law school," Rosalie suggested.

Emmett snorted. "What do you call a newborn vampire set loose in a roomful of lawyers?" he asked, omitting the obvious punch line.

"Rose, Emmett, that's _not_ funny," Esme chided them. "Lawyers are people too. And Bella's not really a newborn any more."

"Jasper," Edward said, "you've been with Bella when she was near humans. How do you read the situation?"

"I'd say she's under reliable control," he answered. "I don't see visiting a college campus being a problem. She could almost attend classes at this point, I think."

Edward and I tagged along when Alice and Jasper drove in to attend lectures that afternoon, and at the last minute Emmett and Rosalie decided to join us. We were minimally disguised on the remote chance someone recognized us from news coverage of the plane crash, although that was unlikely at this point.

I held my breath when we got out of Rosalie's car and approached the campus, but Edward suggested I breathe normally. "You should try and get used to coping with the scent," he told me. "Naturally, if it gets to be too much for you, stop breathing; but otherwise, just accept the thirst." I did as he suggested, and found it manageable.

I did enjoy the tour of the Dartmouth campus: the handsome, well-kept old brick buildings, the houses with Greek letters on them, the enormous library that made me long to go inside and browse. I watched students casually wander in and out of the doorways, lounge outdoors reading, walk down the concrete pathways talking and laughing together.

I noticed Edward watching me. "Your emotions are so mixed right now," he said. As usual, he was reading Jasper's take on my feelings. "Can you tell me what you're thinking?"

"Oh, lots of things. I'm thinking..." I rattled off my random thoughts. "Dartmouth is very much like my mental image of an Ivy League college. They must spend a fortune on groundskeepers. Maybe the Greek columns on the administration building are a bit much. First year students probably get lost here a lot. I covet their library." He grinned knowingly. "I like seeing all the students hanging out, talking about dates and TV shows and nuclear physics and Cartesian dualism more or less interchangeably. And...I hate feeling thirsty around them. They're not just food, and I don't like to think about them that way."

"That's why you feel regretful when you see them?"

"I suppose so, if that's what Jasper's picking up."

"Not because you wish you were one of them?"

"No, of course not!"

"You seem very certain of that."

"I am." I looked at Jasper, and he nodded in confirmation. "I don't feel anything resembling envy. I'm where I belong."

"Bella was meant to be a vampire," Rosalie said. "Even I can accept that."

I smirked as we passed a young couple talking earnestly together beside one of the buildings. "Uh oh."

"What's up?" Alice asked.

I lowered my voice. "That guy thinks the girl is going to sleep with him later, but she actually met with him in order to break up."

Rosalie looked back at the apparently friendly conversation. "And you know that because...?"

"Well, because of her shoelaces, and the big textbook on top of the little one, and his fingernails, and...oh, there are just too many things."

"We're going to have to get used to these random news bulletins," Alice said.

Jasper told me, "You'll have to learn to identify insights that result from your gift, and distinguish them from ordinary observations."

"Why?" I asked.

He smiled. "Once you're associating with humans, these pronouncements will seem odd."

"Oh! Of course."

"Blurting out predictions of the future may have contributed to my involuntary confinement," Alice said. "Learn from my mistakes."

I laughed. "Okay, I'll work on it."

Alice and Jasper went off to their classroom lecture. Feeling confident, I agreed to take a look around the town of Hanover. It was a pretty town, very much dominated by Dartmouth University, outbuildings of Dartmouth, and businesses catering to Dartmouth students. We passed a large concert hall, displaying a poster listing the upcoming productions by Dartmouth's drama school . "They have one or two good things coming up," Rosalie pointed out. "Anybody interested in seeing some live theatre? Bella, you must be ready for a change of scene by now."

"Sitting in a theatre, though? In an enclosed room with a couple of hundred humans?"

"We can find a way for you to practice if you like," Edward said, "work your way up to it. But I think you'll be fine. You can do _anything_."

"Have to like the positive attitude," Emmett remarked.

In fact, I did get a chance to work my way up to a night at the theatre. I started going into town whenever another family member was running an errand, starting with banks during their off hours, moving on to moderately busy pharmacies and hardware stories. My dress rehearsal involved going to the DMV, sitting in its packed waiting room for about forty minutes, then pretending to get an urgent phone message and running back out. I handled it without difficulty.

"Obviously, you should remain alert," Carlisle told me, "but I think we can regard it as safe to have you go wherever any of us go."

We booked tickets for the Dartmouth drama students' presentation of _Into The Woods_ the first weekend in April. I'd never seen the play before, and loved the take on what happens following the 'happily ever after' of a fairy tale. Tanya was interested in a screening of _Blow Up_ that was on for the following weekend, and Edward and I agreed to go.

In fact, now that I was sure I could be trusted in a room full of humans, I was happy to be going places and doing things. I went shopping with Alice, attended movies and concerts, browsed book shops, went antiquing with Esme. Edward and I still needed a great deal of time together, but as long as we had nights and mornings to ourselves, we could assign most afternoons and early evenings to family time.

Later that month, Rosalie came home with a brochure from the Metropolitan Opera Company. "They're putting on The Magic Flute. Who's up for a trip to New York?"

"Me, me!" Alice sang.

"I'd like to go," Esme said. "Bella, what about you? The Magic Flute is a perfect second opera."

"Should we go?" I asked Edward.

"Certainly. But you do realize we'll have to drive there."

"It's okay." I sighed. I much preferred to run.

Alice pushed for a few days in New York prior to the show, so she could get some shopping and sightseeing in, and the family agreed to go during the free week leading up to final exams. Perfect memory freed up a lot of time that would otherwise be spent studying. Carlisle arranged time off from the hospital, which they gave reluctantly, even though he had vacation time coming to him. They were understaffed, and I suspected Carlisle did the work of three.

Everyone hunted the evening before our departure, and Edward and I went directly from the woods to our cottage. "What about when we're in New York?" I asked during a short pause. My hand ran lightly up his arm to his shoulder and down his chest, marvelling at how beautiful he was. I lost track of my question.

"What about New York?" he asked, seeming equally preoccupied.

"Will we have time to ourselves? Because, as much as I love being with the family..."

He smiled. "I understand, and yes, we'll have ample time to ourselves. We're not the only couple who needs privacy." He pulled me closer, his avid expression telling me our pause was over. "Although we may need more of it than anyone else."

He kissed me, and as it always was for us, as it always would be, it was like our first real kiss the night after I was changed. It wasn't possible for our lovemaking to ever seem stale or repetitious, to ever feel like anything but the most intense and moving experience imaginable. We were caught forever, together, in a loop where love and passion and mutual fascination were as permanent and unalterable as our own indestructible bodies.

We took two cars for the trip. Carlisle drove his Mercedes with Esme beside him, Rosalie and Emmett in the back seat, while Edward drove the new grey Volvo he'd purchased to replace the former silver one. I rode shotgun, Alice and Jasper in back.

I alternately watched the changing scenery out the car window, and watched Edward drive, which was even more scenic. "Are we staying in a hotel in New York?" I asked. "I didn't hear the arrangements."

"No," Edward said, "we have a place there."

"A place?"

"We own property in New York City," Jasper explained. "And a few other locations. Not in our own name, of course. They're primarily investments, but we set aside living space in some of them for our own use."

"You must not use them very often," I said.

"No, but we like the convenience when we do travel. We leave the places in the hands of building managers, so we seldom have to concern ourselves with them between visits."

"So what property do you own in New York?"

"It's a fifteen storey building close to Central Park," Edward told me. "Lower levels are retail and office space, higher ones are apartments. The top three floors are ours."

"The whole three floors?"

"It's a very lovely penthouse," Alice said. "Well, multiple penthouses, I guess you'd call it. It's ideal. We're together, but everybody gets their own living space."

"Sounds nice."

"It is! And it's in a perfect location, close to the theatre district, and close to the best shopping." She gave me a stern look, and I laughed.

"Don't worry, Alice. I assumed this trip would involve getting new clothes. I'm not even going to argue."

"That's my girl!" she said, grinning.

The building was described by Alice as Art Deco, "completed," she informed me, "practically _minutes_ before the stock market crash," with a jewellery store, a travel agency, and a leather goods boutique on the ground level. Edward pulled into a two-level parking garage adjoining the building, with designated spaces for the shops and offices, for the apartments, and four adjoining spaces marked 'penthouse.' The Mercedes was already parked in one of them. "You have your own parking spaces reserved?" I said incredulously. "When you only come here maybe once a year?"

"Obviously you've never tried to park in Manhattan," Edward said, pulling into one of the spaces. "We'd get rid of the building before we'd lose the parking spots." He placed a card on the dashboard, presumably to indicate he had a right to park there, and we climbed out of the car and gathered our luggage.

We might have moved into the penthouse, and back out again, without anyone in the building being any the wiser. A door led from the parking area directly into the building, where we faced a bank of elevators. Inside one of the elevators, Edward punched in a key code to gain access to the top three floors. "It's 4277951," he told me, "in case you ever come here on your own." I nodded.

The elevator opened onto a foyer on the thirteenth floor. "Thirteenth," I noted. "Not edited to read fourteenth."

"The building's owners are not particularly superstitious," Jasper said. I chuckled.

Carlisle and his passengers greeted us as we walked in. "Hi!" Emmett said. "We were just talking about dividing up rooms."

"Edward always took the smallest quarters for himself, since he was on his own," Esme said, "so it seems only fair we give him and Bella the top floor this time." Everyone seemed to agree.

I was shown around the Cullen enclave, which consisted of four apartments, separate and private but adjoining each other by means of stairs and corridors. The thirteenth floor had the two 'small' apartments, which had huge bedrooms and bathrooms but more modest living areas and tiny kitchens. The fourteenth floor was one large apartment, as was the fifteenth. They were all decorated in a fairly similar style, more modern than our home back in New Hampshire, and more openly luxurious.

"It's beautiful," I said. "Did Esme do all this?"

"Who else?" Edward smiled at Esme.

"Come on, Bella," Alice urged me. "We've got about four hours before the shops close."

I rolled my eyes, but put my suitcase away and followed her.

The shopping trip was actually fun. Minus the fatigue after following Alice around for hours, and minus the lack of confidence about my own appearance, I enjoyed the whole thing a lot more. I surprised Alice by proposing that she could pick out an outfit for me if I could choose one for her in return. She seemed a little wary, but actually loved my selection. "I wouldn't have picked that for myself," she admitted, "but it's perfect! Bella, we must have started to rub off on you."

We made the same deal regarding a dress for our night at the Met. She found me a midnight blue, form fitting cocktail dress with a shawl neckline, and I chose an unusual, pleated mini tent dress in pale rose silk for her. "Now," she said, "the men need a few things." I asked if I could help her choose clothes for Edward, and she happily agreed.

"It's kind of a shame that men have such a limited range of things to wear," I mused. "I mean, you and Esme and Rose, we're all picking out nice dresses to wear to the concert. The men will all be in suits and ties. They'll look nice, but there's not much variety."

"That's true," she agreed. "And they can't blend in with humans unless they wear the usual male camouflage. It's one reason I wanted to do the masked ball for New Years. It's one time the guys can really be peacocks. I made Jazz his pirate costume, you know."

"I figured," I said, grinning. "He looked very dashing."

"He did, didn't he?" she said dreamily.

"Did Esme make Carlisle's suit?"

"Oh, yes. _And_ convinced him to appear in it."

"Maybe we should do another masked ball for our next big occasion," I said, "so Edward can get a chance to be peacock." We smiled at each other.

A little while later, we ran into Rosalie and Esme in the lingerie department of Saks. "Everyone's shopping," Rosalie told us. "The guys are in menswear at Bloomingdale's buying Heaven knows what. Maybe you're being supplanted, Alice."

"I won't go quietly," she warned.

We chose our lingerie and accessories, then left together to walk back to our temporary digs. I gawked shamelessly as we went, pausing to stare up at a Gothic cathedral set among modern skyscrapers like a piece from a toy city that had been mixed in with the wrong construction set.

"St. Patrick's," Rosalie said. Esme began telling me about the significance of its architecture, but seeing that I studied the Elizabeth Arden salon with just as much interest, she dropped the subject.

"Sorry," I said. "I don't know anything about architecture or historic buildings. I'd like to learn more, once I have some background."

"I understand, dear. There'll be plenty of time for that, if you have an interest."

"Did you always like that kind of thing? Building design, decorating, renovations, and all that?"

"I suppose I did, although only in a very informal way at first. When I first came to live with Carlisle and Edward, I wasn't able to go out in public for a long time."

I interrupted. "You weren't? Why?"

"For one thing, I was known in the community as a recently deceased war widow, and couldn't be seen out walking the streets, revealing myself as either alive or my own ghost."

"Oh, of course. Been there."

She smiled. "And besides, I couldn't be trusted outside the house for quite a long time. I wasn't as controlled as you are, when I was a newborn. It took me well over a year to be able to go out among humans."

"Really?" It surprised me. Esme had such an affection for everyone, including human acquaintances. I thought it should have prevented her from wishing them harm; but maybe it wasn't that simple.

"Oh, yes. But while I was staying out of sight, I occupied myself by redecorating the house and making it a little more pleasant. There was nothing really wrong with the house, mind you, but it was a typical bachelor's residence, strictly functional. I tried to make it more homelike. It was satisfying work, and I found I had a knack for it. Carlisle suggested, years later, that I study design formally, and I eventually took a degree in interior design and a Master's in architecture." She thought a moment. "I believe I always liked that sort of work, even before I came to stay with Carlisle."

I thought it was odd that Esme never said _when I was changed_, but instead _when I came to live with Carlisle_. My impression was that she thought of being with Carlisle as the significant event, and her transformation into a vampire as no more than a means to an end. I could kind of relate. "Do you remember your human life, Esme? If you don't mind my asking."

"I don't mind at all, dear; but no, I don't remember it very well. I recall the things that I've thought about since the change, because those thoughts become permanently recorded in my memory - I'm sure you've figured that out by now?" I nodded. I'd been deliberately recalling significant events in my human life, knowing that it would keep those memories intact. Recollections of my past life were already growing dim. "But a lot of it is very unclear. I had a happy childhood, but my adult life was often difficult. I don't miss it, if that's what you're asking. Even though I found it difficult to adapt at first, I know I belong here. I felt as if I'd come home, when I opened my eyes after the change, and found Carlisle there with me." She tilted her head to look at me. "Is there a reason you asked?"

"Just...comparing notes. I expected my human memories to be a little unclear, but...well, I've heard you, and Tanya's family, talk about being human as their old life, and being born into a new life. I thought it was just a metaphor. I didn't expect just how much it would seem as if I really had died in that plane crash, and started over in a different life." Esme nodded thoughtfully. "It's not a _bad_ thing, not at all. I've never been so happy. It's just unexpected."

That night, Alice, Jasper, Rosalie and Emmett decided to go dancing at some very exclusive club. "Remember that night," Alice reminisced, "when we all went to Agent 99, and Em and Rose were voguing, and got swarmed by paparazzi?"

Rosalie giggled. "We never figured out which celebrities they thought we were."

The four of them headed out, dressed for prompt admission by even the most finicky bouncer. Carlisle had tagged along with Esme to a lecture and slide show on Mies Van Der Rohe. Edward and I took a walk through the immediate area, so I could get a look at Radio City Music Hall and other such landmarks, then we returned to our apartment and stayed in the rest of the evening. During quiet pauses, I initiated something that would become a regular practice for many months to come: I had him describe for me, in detail, aspects of our lives together while I was still human, from our first conversation to our honeymoon, so I could save them more accurately on my perfect new memory. I was making a mental scrapbook of my former life.


	17. Landmarks

The following night we attended The Magic Flute. I actually invited Esme's commentary on the interior of the Metropolitan Opera House; the place was a lot to take in, and her explanations were starting to make more sense to me. Since this was the largest indoor crowd I'd attempted, I was given some last minute precautions, but I found I was under control, although my thirst flared uncomfortably. The Cullens had somehow obtained box seats, which gave us a little space, and that helped. The opera itself was fun and not terribly challenging, ideal for someone like me who was still getting used to that kind of music. I enjoyed the scene with Papageno and Papagena. In a way, it was an ideal relationship: wish for a perfect partner, have one appear and immediately love you, and live happily ever after. I'd done that, but with an awful lot of unpleasant drama between the appearance and the ever after.

We spent the next few days visiting museums and galleries, ranging from the Guggenheim to the Museum of Math to a display of political cartoons of the last three centuries; walking around the city any time it wasn't sunny, sightseeing and people-watching; and, of course, shopping, under Alice's direction. In the evenings we attended plays and concerts, mostly moving on from opera to more familiar fare. I enjoyed every minute.

The only really unpleasant event took place when Edward, Rosalie, Emmett and I were on our way back from a rather seedy bar, which Edward had wanted to visit because a little known musician he admired was playing there. We walked at a leisurely pace, talking happily and taking the most direct route, even if it led us through dangerous neighbourhoods. We had nothing to fear, after all. As we turned a corner, a thin, pale young man in a Yankees cap, googly blue eyes wide and staring as though in fear, stepped out of a doorway and pointed a gun at us.

"Wallets," he snapped. "Jewellery, watches, phones, iPods, whatever you got. Put it in here." He dropped a plastic shopping bag at our feet.

We stood still, looking at him. "You're robbing _us_? _Really_?" Rosalie laughed incredulously.

"Did _he_ pick the wrong street corner!" Emmett agreed.

"Yeah, really!" the man said, looking a little nonplussed at our calm reaction. "Come on, wallets, _now_!" He waved the gun at us menacingly.

"What's the best way to deal with this?" Emmett asked, speaking too quickly for the man to understand. "We don't want to risk his shooting us and having the bullet ricochet through a window or something."

"It's not a problem," I said. "The gun's not loaded."

They all looked at me as our mugger waved his gun and demanded our valuables with decreasing confidence. "Are you sure?" Edward asked me, speaking at human speed.

"Absolutely sure. Sorry, but no," I told the young man. "There aren't any bullets in your gun."

"Oh yeah?" he blustered. "You really want to test that theory?" He aimed the barrel at me, his hand unsteady.

"Sure." I stood and waited. Emmett snorted with amusement.

"Aw, _man_!" he groaned. "Okay, so there's no bullets. If I could afford bullets, I wouldn't be standing here. Look, can't you spare me a few bucks? You guys look like you're rolling. I don't pay my rent this month, I'm out on the street, and there's no coming back from that, not for me." He turned away without waiting for an answer. "Okay, at least let me go. I didn't hurt anybody."

"Tell you what," Edward said. "I'll buy your gun from you."

The man looked down at his gun in surprise. "It don't work," he admitted, "even if it had bullets. I found it in the storm drain. Had to scrape off a lot of rust."

Edward chuckled. "I don't mind." He reached for his wallet, handing the man whatever cash was inside. I did the same, pleased with his idea, and Rosalie and Emmett followed suit. "One thousand, eight hundred fifteen dollars," Edward said, offering the roll of bills to our underqualified robber. "Will that do?"

He nodded warily, seeming to expect a trick. Edward held out the money, and the young man cautiously reached for it, handing over his dysfunctional handgun at the same time. Edward accepted it. "Thank you."

"Um, it's okay. I mean, thanks." He started backing away, still watching us carefully.

"Good luck," I said. He turned and ran.

We continued the way we'd come. Edward paused when we got to a trash can, crushed the gun into small pieces, and tossed it. "I like your approach to street crime," I told him.

He grimaced. "Who knows? Maybe it will keep him from trying it a second time."

"Edward's always been a crusader at heart," Rosalie said, smirking. "He couldn't even turn to conventional hunting without making it a public service."

I took Edward's hand, pleased with him.

Back at the penthouse, the rest of the family were filled in on our attempted mugging. "How did you know the gun wasn't loaded?" Alice asked me.

I thought, trying to piece together all the little clues that had produced that certainty. "Well, where do I start? His left thumb..."

"We have to stop asking that," Rosalie cut in. "It's always from a thousand different things that don't seem to add up, except to Bella."

"That's true," Alice agreed. "We should just accept that she sometimes knows things. When anybody asks how you know, Bella, just say, 'Elementary, my dear Cullen!'"

We finished out our week with a concert at Carnegie Hall on Friday night - where I requested Esme's analysis of the building's design - and a performance of _42nd Street_ on Saturday. We were preparing to drive back to New Hampshire on Sunday. "We have to come back with the cousins some time," Rosalie said. "There's always so much we don't fit into one visit."

"That's true," I agreed. "I've got a long list of things I didn't get around to."

"Well," Esme said, "there's no good reason why Edward and Bella have to come back with us right now, is there?" I looked at her in surprise. "The rest of us have work, or exams, but Edward and Bella are still..."

"Officially non-existent?" Alice suggested.

"Exactly."

Edward caught my eye, looking for my take. I approved. "If you wouldn't mind, then, perhaps we'll stay on a few more days. Take the cars, and Bella and I can run home."

The trunks of the two cars were stuffed with purchases, the family headed back to New Hampshire, and Edward and I were left to occupy the three storey penthouse by ourselves. We did, in fact, go out to see the sights and take advantage of the cultural amenities, but a great deal of time was taken enjoying the sense of total privacy. We made love in every part of all three floors over the course of our second week.

"How gentle do I have to be with humans?" I asked Edward as we lay together during one of our periodic pauses. He shook his head, not understanding. "I mean, I haven't ever touched a human since..." I glanced down at my indestructible body. "Eventually I'll have to shake hands with them and stuff. How do I avoid hurting them? Can you show me?"

"Yes, if you like." He took my hand in his. "This would be a weak handshake, suitable only for small children." He increased the pressure of his hand slightly. "This is an average grip, and this," he tightened his grip again, "would be a very firm handshake. This would be uncomfortable, and _this_," he gripped my hand tighter still, "would actually do injury."

"Got it. It's not a very broad spectrum, is it?"

"No, not very."

"You had to touch me that way," I mused, "when I was human."

"I wouldn't say 'had to,' exactly," he said, grinning. "It was done entirely on a voluntary basis."

I smiled back. "Still, it must have been very limiting."

He shook his head. "I didn't feel that way. It was pure joy, mixed with a little fear over the possibility of injuring you. But it is, I'll admit, very freeing to be with you as an equal, without the fear or the caution." He kissed me, and our pause came to an end.

Alone with Edward, I felt a little more free to suggest silly or touristy activities. We visited Madame Tussaud's and the Statue of Liberty. We rode the Staten Island Ferry just because I'd seen people do it in the movies, and walked past Tiffany's for the sake of an Audrey Hepburn moment. Edward insisted on going inside so he could buy me something.

"Please, Bella?" he wheedled. "All our money is common property now; it's merely a ritual. I want to get you something in one of those little blue boxes. "

Of course, I relented. We went in and browsed happily for a while. "I've chosen all your jewelry for you so far," Edward said. "This time, please tell me what you want." I shrugged. "I know it's contrary to your nature to demand anything, but make an exception this once. Just point and say 'gimme'."

I laughed. "I'll do my best." I looked around. "I can't imagine finding any jewelry I like better than what you've given me, but...what about a watch? I don't own a wristwatch." I no longer needed one to tell time, but I thought wearing a watch would be helpful when I was trying to look more human.

"Excellent." Edward asked to be directed to ladies' watches.

I looked around indifferently for some time, until I noticed a corner display case containing vintage watches. "Look!" I said, peering through the glass. "That's probably the prettiest watch I've ever seen." It had a small, delicate rectangular face covered by beveled glass, bearing decorative numerals interwoven with a chain design. I recalled Alice mentioning the brand name, which was French, but I wasn't sure if it was significant on a wristwatch.

A member of the sales staff quietly appeared. "1928," he said. "It's in perfect working order. You'd have to wind it daily, of course."

"That's all right," I said, studying the charming little watch. It was taken from the display case and laid in front of me, and I held it against my arm. I looked up at Edward and mouthed, _Gimme._

He grinned. "We'll take it," he told the man behind the counter. Edward paid with his credit card, and we waited while the watch was carefully packed in the requisite blue box. I didn't even take any notice of how much it cost. I was blending in with the Cullen family quickly.

"Thank you," I said as we left the store.

"The pleasure is mine."

We continued with our planned itinerary for the day: visiting literary landmarks, including the Algonquin Hotel, where Dorothy Parker and her friends met and said witty things; Washington Square, because it was my favourite Henry James novel; and the former site of the Biltmore Hotel, where Holden Caulfield waited under the big clock. Edward seemed to find my approach to sightseeing perfectly rational. He reciprocated by showing me the bar where he'd once watched Jimi Hendrix drop acid; the doorway where John Lennon was shot; and a place where he'd heard The Clash play in 1979. The hotel where he'd heard Tom Waits was the same location where Arthur C. Clarke had written 2001: A Space Odyssey, and so we concluded with a site of mutual interest.

The final evening, we went out to see _Guys and Dolls_, returned to the penthouse to make love for another hour or two, then made our preparations to leave. Edward telephoned whoever was in charge of maintaining the penthouse during its lengthy vacancies, to leave a message that we were vacating the premises. We bagged up our clothing and dropped it in the nearest charity bin, returning home with nothing except what we had on.

We started out by walking, using the opportunity to see parts of the city we'd overlooked. Edward pointed out the hotel where Dashiell Hammett had reputedly skipped out on his bar bill, a bar where Charles Bukowski had been arrested for public intoxication, the sidewalk where Dylan Thomas literally drank himself to death.

"Alcohol seems to play a big part in creative people's lives," I said.

"The connection between the two has been noted."

"Can vampires get drunk at all?"

"No."

"Do you suppose that makes us less imaginative?"

He snorted. "I doubt it. I suspect the benefits of heavy drinking to the creative mind have been exaggerated by alcoholic novelists, and possibly by bar owners."

We moved rapidly through the dark streets, avoiding the few passers by still out at such a late hour. At one point I stopped short as a distinctive scent caught my attention. "That's..." I looked at Edward.

He nodded. "A vampire's been through here recently."

I inhaled, trying to distinguish for myself how fresh the trail was. "A few hours?"

"Probably. I'm surprised we haven't crossed paths with one before. Any city this large is going to have at least one vampire at any given time." He smiled wryly. "We're doing things backwards. We tend to live in areas with a low human population, close to large areas of wilderness, partly because they provide the best hunting. Most of our kind prefer to be where there's a high density of humans, for the same reason."

"What should I do if I encounter another vampire? When I'm alone?"

"You can avoid them or speak to them, as you prefer. Don't do anything that might be perceived as aggressive; and if they object to your presence for any reason, leave quietly. It's not likely there will be any problem, but it doesn't hurt to be cautious."

"Do you have vampire friends? I mean, conventional vampires. I remember Jasper does, from his time in the south."

"Carlisle made a number of acquaintances over the years, but the fact that they hunt humans creates a barrier against close friendship."

When we left the city behind and the population became more sparse we began to run in earnest, avoiding residential areas and darting through parks, woodlots and the treed areas along highways. I had a flash of memory from when I was human, of riding on Edward's back, marvelling at how smoothly he moved, how his voice didn't even shake when he spoke to me as he ran. Experiencing it from the other side was even better: all the exhilaration of extreme speed, but under perfect and effortless control. Edward and I talked as we ran through the night.

"It was nice having the extra week with just the two of us," I said, a little shyly.

He smiled at me. "I agree."

"Not that I didn't like the time we spent with the family..."

"No, I understand. We need a balance of both."

I nodded. "They didn't mind, did they? That we stayed behind?"

"Not in the least. Bella, you haven't been with the family long enough to know this, but the Cullen couples take time to themselves on a fairly regular basis. Emmett and Rosalie often take separate vacations, Alice and Jasper will sometimes disappear together for a day or two at a time, and Esme and Carlisle have a private retreat off the coast of Brazil they visit together occasionally."

"I didn't realize. You're always together, so..."

"We stay together when the family is facing difficulty, and unfortunately, much of the time we've known each other has involved difficulty."

"Things were a little hectic," I agreed. "Well, I'm glad it's okay. I like the balance idea."

We arrived just after dawn to find the house empty, but their scent trail led directly to the cousins' lodge. We followed them there.

"Hello, dears," Esme greeted us. "Did you just get in?"

"Yes. How are things here?"

"Couldn't be better," Alice said. "It's going to be sunny, so we thought we'd hunt."

"Shall we join them?" Edward asked me.

"Definitely." It had been almost two weeks, about my limit.

We compared notes on the past week. The college students in the family had finished final exams and were enrolled in summer classes. "You must really love your studies," I said, smiling. "No time off at all?"

"We wanted to earn degrees while we were here," Jasper said, "and do it quickly, in case we decide to relocate sooner than expected."

I was going to follow up on that, but Eleazar said, "Bella, I hear you've been experiencing your insights on a regular basis. Are you developing any more control over them?"

"I don't think so, but I _am_ able to recognize them better. They feel a little bit like dreams used to. I get this information, and I'm not completely sure where it's coming from, I just know it's true. Kind of like those dreams where you just know certain things. With these insights, or whatever they are, I can figure out how I ended up knowing something, but it's hard to see; I have to really concentrate. I'm not sure how else to explain it."

"That's fine, my dear. It makes sense. As a human, you received your insights through your subconscious, which made the necessary deductions without your being aware of it, and delivered the knowledge to your conscious mind, either directly or through dreams. Now, our kind don't have a subconscious in the human sense, but your gift still seems to function at the very periphery of your conscious mind, almost out of your reach. You receive the final product, the information, but the process by which you deduced it would be hard to clarify."

"That's exactly the way it is," I agreed. "I've given up trying to explain how I got to the information. But at least I can tell when it's happening."

"That's very useful. Perhaps, then, you can go back to developing your primary gift, your shield."

"Sure."

"Come on," Rosalie said, standing. "Let's hunt."

The weather warmed as spring turned to summer. Carlisle continued to work the night shift at the hospital; Esme did volunteer work as part of our cover story, and because she liked to; the other four family members maintained a full course load through the summer. Edward's and my first anniversary arrived, and we reminisced happily about our wedding day. By mutual agreement, we didn't exchange gifts, but the next day Edward turned up with a present.

"Something I thought you'd like to have," he said. "We talked about it once, during our honeymoon." He offered me a bulky item in a fabric bag. I opened it and took out a violin case.

"Oh! Yes, I remember." I opened the case. "It's beautiful." I took the instrument out and gently plucked the strings.

"You don't have to start learning immediately, of course. I just thought you should have it available when and if you do want to begin."

"Thank you."

I'd intended to set the violin aside until later, just because the days already seemed so full; but I started fooling around with the bow, trying to get a musical sound out of the instrument, and I became intrigued. I found online music lessons and started practicing during idle minutes. Eleazar, who also played the violin, helped me along. It would have been a slow process if it were not for my perfect recall; nothing I learned was lost, even if I put the violin aside for a week or more.

I also continued to work on my shield, and had reached the point where I could employ it as quickly and effortlessly as any other part of my body. I could shield one person or twelve; could instantly shift it so it protected one additional person, be removed from another. I even discovered a neat little trick by accident: I could 'flip' my shield so that it prevented others from employing their mental gifts - not just on me, but on anyone.

I discovered it one day when I was at the Cullen house, reading. Edward and Emmett came in from outside, where they'd been doing something involving Edward's car. Emmett jokingly asked me to shield Edward from his thoughts. He said it that way: 'shield Edward from my thoughts' rather than 'shield me from Edward's mind reading,' and I unthinkingly reached out to Edward.

"Just Emmett," Edward laughed, "not everyone."

As soon as I heard his words, I understood what I was doing. I'd often thought of my shield as a two-way mirror. This felt as if I were reversing it, holding the mirrored surface up to Edward, so that his gift reflected back on him, and couldn't reach anyone else. I started practicing my new trick, secretly at first, making sure I wasn't mistaken. I demonstrated the new facet of my gift one day at while visiting Tanya's family.

"I think I've got something new," I told Eleazar. "The shield works two ways."

"How do you mean?" he asked. Everyone tuned in.

"Well, I realized I can shield people - like right now, I'm shielding Alice. You can't hear her thoughts, right?" I looked at Edward and he nodded. "Okay, but _now_ I'm not shielding anybody else in the room."

Edward frowned. "I can't hear anyone's thoughts. If you're not preventing it, then...?"

"I'm shielding _you_!" I grinned at him.

"Excuse me?"

"My shield...reverses, I guess you'd say. I can block you from reading anybody's thoughts."

"A significant discovery," Eleazar said. "Would you mind trying it out with Kate?"

Kate stood up, wiggling her fingers as though to loosen them up for action. I looked at her warily. "Just a little jolt, right?"

"Of course." She looked around. "Any volunteers?"

Emmett approached her. "I'll give it a shot."

"Okay. Give me a second." I reached out with my shield, turning it wrong way out, the way I had with Edward. "Go ahead."

Kate placed her hand against Emmett's arm. No reaction. "It works!"

Eleazar turned to me. "And you say you are using your shield on Kate, not on Emmett?"

"That's right."

"That's an interesting development," Carlisle said.

We all fell back into our comfortable but happy daily routine. I spent my nights and mornings alone with Edward, afternoons with the family. I read books, finishing my own stash and going on to borrow material from Carlisle and from the cousins. I drove my sweet little Ferrari into town for the occasional movie or play or concert, or out of town for the inevitable shopping with Alice, or sometimes just for a drive in the country with Edward. I began producing recognizable music on my violin. There were still chores, housecleaning and laundry and such, but it was so fast and effortless, it hardly counted as work. Just as with my more mundane routine when I was human, everything I did was a source of happiness, as long as I was with Edward.

* * *

In the fall, Edward suggested the two of us take a short trip together. "Where?" I asked him.

"To Chicago. I'd like you to see the place I grew up, what's left of it."

"Of course! I'd love that. Will we run?"

He grinned, knowing how much I enjoyed my newfound speed. "We could, but I was thinking of taking a plane."

"That would be okay, too."

Once again, we altered our appearance just a little, and the reliably documented Donna Stevens and Michael Ryan arrived at O'Hare just after dawn. Edward rented a car and headed into the city. We drove away from the airport, past nondescript office compounds, through modern suburbs and modest city neighbourhoods, finally reaching what must have once been the elegant part of town, and was still fairly upscale. There was a mix of contemporary homes and apartment buildings, and older brick houses, some nicely restored and others showing signs of wear.

We drove down a busy street lined with ornate old apartment buildings. "Charlie Chaplin lived there at one time," Edward commented, pointing at a building as we passed.

"He did? While you were living here?"

"Yes. I would have been in my mid teens. I wasn't aware of the exact address at the time, but I did know Chaplin lived in Chicago. I have a faint memory of keeping an eye out for him whenever I walked down the street."

I smiled at the image of a young Edward, glancing hopefully at passing strangers in case one of them might turn out to be a silent film star. "Were you a fan of his movies?"

"Oh, yes. Almost everyone was."

We turned down a tree-lined avenue with still more of the architectural mixed bag: Victorian and Edwardian homes side by side with houses ranging from Fifties style to brand new. Edward pulled the car to the curb in front of an old brick house. I now knew, having absorbed a little of Esme's information, that it was in the Prairie School style, popular in the early years of the twentieth century. I looked at Edward to see why we had stopped.

"This is it."

"Oh!" I looked at the house more carefully. "It's huge! Was this really a house for one family?"

"The extension in the back is after my time, but yes, even in its original form it was a big place. I suppose my parents wanted a large family, which, as we know, did not come to pass. They may have had live-in servants as well." He was looking at the house with a frown, as if trying to remember something.

"Do you still own it?"

"No, it's in other hands now; but it's well taken care of. It's considered an historically significant building because of the architect who designed it, so it's carefully maintained."

"I can see that. It's a beautiful place."

"Shall we go inside?" He stepped out of the car and came around to open my door.

I hopped out. "Can we? Aren't people living there?"

He nodded to a small sign that came in sight as we approached the house: _Lakeview Bed & Breakfast_. "I reserved a room for the night." He took my overnight bag and his own from the trunk and we approached the broad front porch and stepped through the arched door into a large foyer with a reception desk in one corner.

"Good morning." A tall woman with salt and pepper hair stood behind the desk. "Can I help you?"

"Good morning," Edward said, setting down the baggage and approaching her. "We have a reservation."

"The name?"

"Ryan."

"Yes, Mr. Ryan, you're in number four." She waited while Edward signed the register, then came out from behind the desk to take us up the stairs.

"No, please don't bother," Edward said. "I'm sure we can find it." He picked up the bags.

"All right. It's the second door on your right at the top of the stairs. Please let me know if you need anything."

"Thank you," I said, and followed Edward up the wide staircase, looking around curiously. "It's so strange," I whispered to him, "to think of you living here as a boy. Has the house changed very much?"

"From what I can remember, not very much in basic structure, but quite a lot in its decorating scheme." He opened the door to our room and I followed him inside. It was a spacious bedroom containing a king sized wrought iron bed, a writing desk, a bookcase flanked by two easy chairs, and a small television on a wall bracket. True to B&B protocol, it was decorated with a selection of framed samplers and sepia photographs, needlepoint cushions, pieces of wooden folk art, and a doorstop shaped like a frog.

Edward was staring out the window onto the street. "Does being here make you sad?" I asked.

"Sad? Not in the least. I"m just trying to dredge up old memories, and they're hard to access."

I nodded, looking around the room. The adjoining bathroom was the same size as the bedroom, and contained a non-historically-accurate oversized whirlpool tub. "This would have come in handy during our honeymoon," I remarked, indicating the tub.

He smirked. "There's no reason we can't still use it, even if temperature is no longer an issue."

"True enough." I studied the room. "Was this your bedroom?"

"No, mine was the room across the corridor from us. My parents' room was at the front of the house. This would have been a guest room."

"Can I see your old bedroom, do you think?"

He grinned. "I'll see if it can be arranged. It probably won't look much like it did when I occupied it, you realize."

"Really? You didn't go in for the patchwork cats and clothespin dolls?"

He snorted and ran lightly down the stairs. "I wonder if I could ask a huge favour," I heard him say to the manager in that velvety voice that would leave even an older woman like herself with no choice but to say yes. "Some family friends stayed here last year, and they mentioned how much they liked their room - room three? My girlfriend was hoping to take a peek inside, if it's not occupied."

"Oh yes, Three is a very nice room. I don't see why not; there's no one staying there until tonight. Charlene," she called to a girl who was listlessly dusting the adjoining parlour, "would you mind showing the young lady Number Three?"

Charlene, a girl of few words, took the key and stumped up the stairs. She opened the room door and stood back so we could walk through. It was about the same size as our room. I tried to see past the kitschy decorations and imagine the room as it might have looked in Edward's day. "My bed was here," Edward said, too low to be heard by anyone but me, "and the desk where I studied, in this corner." He looked out the window. "The view out this window was all parkland. And there was a tree just outside, shading the room in the summer."

We thanked Charlene and she wordlessly locked the door and returned downstairs. "Shall we take a look around the city?" Edward asked.

He brought me to Wrigley Field, where he'd attended games from the age of fifteen. "You were a baseball fan even then?" I asked. "Are you the reason the Cullens are ballplayers?"

"Part of the reason, certainly. I introduced Carlisle to baseball. We've been playing since Emmett joined the family. I still recall the first time we all attended a baseball game. It was a Dodgers home game."

"So you really did go to Los Angeles at some point? I thought it was too sunny."

"No, the _Brooklyn_ Dodgers."

"Oh, right."

He showed me the site of his old high school, the church he and his family had attended, the park where he hung out with his friends. We visited some tourist attractions as well, at my request choosing those which had been in existence during Edward's human life: the old silent film studio, a former train station, a concert hall. We drove along the lake. "Not much is the same as in 1918," he said, "but the beach is still there."

We attended a concert at the music hall Edward had once or twice gone to when he was a boy, and returned to the B & B at about eleven. The same woman was at the desk. Apparently she needed little more sleep than we did. "Good evening!" she said brightly. "Did you have a nice day of sightseeing?"

"Very nice, thanks," I answered. "It's an interesting city."

She beamed. "Breakfast is from six-thirty until nine."

"Thank you," Edward said. "May we take a look around the parlour before we go up?"

"Of course. You can borrow any of the books there, if you want some light reading."

We walked into the parlour, a gorgeous room with wood-framed bay windows and built-in bookcases, which was not improved by the incompatible Colonial style furniture and flocked wallpaper. "Esme wouldn't approve of their decorating," I remarked.

He chuckled. "No, she wouldn't." He beckoned me over to the far end of the room, where a collection of old photographs were arranged on the wall. I went to stand beside him and looked up at the pictures. They were mostly early twentieth century photographs of the neighbourhood and of some of its former residents, ladies in long dresses and men in top hats, identified with printed labels.

"This one," Edward said, pointing to a framed portrait of a dark haired, bearded man in his thirties. The man sat in the stiff, unsmiling pose that was apparently the norm for portraits in those days, but I thought he looked like someone who could laugh. He had kind eyes. I looked back at Edward questioningly, and he touched the label in the lower corner of the frame._ Edward A. Masen, attorney and philanthropist, resided here with his family from 1905 until his death in 1918_.

I took in the image, then we bid our hostess good night and walked up the stairs to our room. We lay together a while, talking quietly. "Thank you for taking me here," I said.

"Thank you for coming. There's a strange sense of...completion, bringing you here."

"Bringing me home to meet your father?"

He smiled. "Yes, in part. And coming back to tell my mother that she was right."

"Right?"

"Right to ask Carlisle to save me. Something I thought was a mistake for so many years. I don't know if she even understood what she was asking; but she wanted me to live, and to be happy. If she could see us together, she'd be satisfied."


	18. Moving On

To: Rachel Black  
Subject: News, weather, books

_Hi Rachel,_  
_I hope you had a good Christmas. How is the school year going? What are your kids reading this year?_  
_Thanks for sending me that book review. I always thought Robertson Davies was overrated, and it's nice to know someone with credentials agrees with me. The reviewer is right, every Robertson Davies character talks exactly like Robertson Davies - college professors, cab drivers, circus performers, bag ladies, small children, they all talk exactly the same. How did he get such a reputation for great writing? His stories are interesting, though, I have to admit. I read the whole Deptford trilogy, in spite of the character thing._  
_I've been travelling a little bit, and saw New York City and Chicago. Absorbed lots of culture, faced an attempted mugging, went to the places where the Vicious Circle met and where some of the Beat writers hung out. I'm attaching some photos._  
_I'm sorry to hear Jacob is still so gloomy. He was always such a happy kid when he was younger. I hope he comes around. At least he's doing okay in school._  
_Thanks so much for the pictures of the wedding. Dad and Sue look so happy together. Even Leah looks happy LOL. She makes a very pretty bridesmaid. Are they going to live in Dad's house or in Sue's, do you know?_  
_I'm adding a link to the article on Mark Twain we were talking about. Hope you enjoy it._

I added a lengthy chapter to the ongoing discussion we were having about the future of the printed book, replied to some questions from her last message, passed along regards to her family, signed _Your friend, B_, and hit Send. Rachel was my only real link, at present, to the human world. It wasn't likely I'd ever have another human friend, even once I started attending school and interacting with the general public. We had to stay aloof. Rachel was an exception, mostly because she already knew everything that had to be kept secret from the rest of the world.

I left the computer and helped Esme and Jasper remove decorations from our Christmas tree and haul the empty tree outside. Well, I didn't so much haul it as throw it like a javelin directly into the woodlot on the far end of the property. I joined Edward at the piano, and he smiled as he played, nodding toward the violin case that lay on top of the piano. I took out my fiddle - which I now knew was a handmade instrument from Germany, worth thousands - rosined the bow, and when he finished the piece he was playing and began a familiar duet, joined in. My playing was still far from brilliant, but it was coming along quickly.

Rosalie and Emmett returned from their afternoon classes, and Carlisle emerged from his study. "While we're all here, I wonder if we could discuss something?"

We gathered around the antique dining table, standing comfortably. "Is this about Esme's car?" Emmett asked. "The replacement's coming in by the end of next week." He glanced apologetically at Esme.

"No, not about that. You and Jasper have agreed to keep your, er, competitions at a distance from buildings and vehicles in the future, and we're satisfied with that. No, I wanted to open discussions about our next move. I believe we should plan to relocate soon after graduation. I apologize if anyone was hoping to move on to graduate school at this location, but I don't think it's advisable to stay. We are continuing with the identities and cover story we were using in Forks, and that makes Esme and myself appear even further from our supposed ages than usual."

"We should plan to leave by summer, then?" Rosalie asked.

"Yes. A month or two either way shouldn't matter, but we need to establish new identities before our age discrepancy becomes any more noticeable."

"Our next location was supposed to be Minnesota," Esme said, "but there are other possibilities, if anyone has a preference."

"Actually," Alice said, "I had an alternate proposal." We all turned to her. "We haven't travelled extensively, or even left the continent, for a long time. And Bella's hardly been _anywhere_. She and Edward are still supposed to keep a low profile, especially in the U.S. What if we took a tour together before we settle into our next home base?"

"Any discussion?" Carlisle asked.

"It does seem like an ideal time for travel," Esme said. "And Alice is right, Bella's never had the opportunity before."

The others were nodding. "What do you think, Bella?" Carlisle asked.

"Honestly, I'm happy wherever. But I wouldn't mind seeing more of the world."

"Anyone opposed to the idea?" Carlisle asked. No one was. "There seems to be a consensus."

"What if we asked Tanya's family to come with us this time?" Rosalie asked. That idea, too, seemed to meet with unanimous approval.

"We'll need to make some preparations," Carlisle said. "We should have a residence available for whenever we come back."

"The place in Minnesota can be kept on stand-by," Esme said.

"Thank you, my dear. And we'll need a more extensive range of paperwork than usual."

Jasper nodded. "I'll get on it. And I can offer Tanya's family help with their passports and such, if they need it."

"I'll make sure our old ID gets disappeared," Rosalie said, "when the time comes."

"Excellent. If our cousins agree to come, we can work out an itinerary with them."

Tanya's family were happy to join us. "But you'll be living elsewhere after your travels are done?" Carmen asked.

"Yes, we've been using the same identity for far too long already. We have a site in Minnesota."

"Then I hope we can once again relocate, and remain your close neighbours."

"I'm sure that's what we all want," Tanya agreed.

"It seems a little unfair," Carlisle observed, "that we are allowed to choose a location, and you arrange your own plans to fit in with ours."

"Well, we did choose Alaska," Irina pointed out, "and you joined us there."

"And you're very good at doing the preliminary research," Kate added. "I don't think anyone minds if you pick the location, and we follow after." The others murmured agreement.

"Very well," Carlisle said. "But we remain open to change, if you should have a preferred location in the future."

I was happy to hear our cousins would continue to stay close. I was enjoying their company.

Rachel answered my message a few days later. She talked about my trip, and her sixth graders, and went on with our usual book discussion. Five thousand or so words later, she replied to some of my questions.

_Charlie and Sue aren't going to live in either house. They're selling both, and moving to another place halfway between the Rez and Forks. Charlie has to be closer to town because of his work, so he didn't want to move to LaPush; and Sue wants to be close to Seth's school and her own job at the health centre, so they compromised. It might change after Seth graduates and goes to college. Incidentally, Seth received a full scholarship out of the blue, one he didn't even apply for. I don't suppose you know anything about that, do you?_

I smiled to myself. The Pacific Northwest Trust was at it again.

_Leah came down for the holidays and stayed at Sue's place. She is talking about coming back here after she graduates, provided she can find work. I hope she considers the Rez school; it's always hard to find enough teachers willing to stay on here. Leah is cranky, but she's also pretty bright, and would probably do well with the high school students. I wouldn't try assigning her to the little kids, at least not until she mellows a bit. It might be just as well she's not going to have kids of her own. I guess she's not able to; she thinks it's because of the wolf thing. She won't give up phasing, though, like the rest of the pack have. Leah's hard to figure sometimes._  
_Christmas was great, thanks. We spent half of the day with Paul's family, and half with mine. Paul and I are going up to Seattle for New Years Eve, which will give us a holiday to ourselves. _  
_By the way, it's still a secret from the families, but I guess I can tell you: we're engaged. Paul proposed last week, and we're planning a wedding in May. I'm very happy about it, and Paul - well, as you know, Paul can't help but be happy about it. I'd have you as a bridesmaid if I could, but since that's not possible, I'm going to ask my sister - which is expected in any case - and let you be my invisible bridesmaid, wishing me good luck although absent, which I am sure you do._  
_Your friend, Rachel_

I was excited about the engagement, if not terribly surprised, and touched by her bridesmaid comments; but I was distracted by an odd thought coming into my head. I recognized the signs that my extra gift was in play: my eyelids fluttered a little, like vestigial REM, and I found it hard to place the source of the idea, even though we supposedly don't have a hidden subconscious. The conclusion was clear, though. I pondered whether to talk to Rachel about it at once, and decided to delay a little. I sent back a short but heartfelt message of congratulations and best wishes to her and Paul.

Further on into the new year, my little insight still resting in the back of my mind like a saved phone message, I decided to get a second opinion. One afternoon, when the four college students were in classes, I tapped lightly on the open door to Carlisle's study. "Carlisle? Do you have a minute?"

He looked up from his book. "Of course, my dear. What can I do for you?"

"I just wanted your take on something. You know I keep in touch with Rachel Black." He nodded. "Is there any reason it would be a problem for her to know about my, er, gift?"

"You mean gifts, plural," he corrected with a smile. "I don't believe so. She keeps your nature, in fact your existence, a secret. Is there a particular reason you want to tell her?"

"Yeah. I've sort of got a message for her." I made wavy gestures with my fingers at both temples to indicate it was one of my 'elementary' deductions I was talking about.

He laughed. "I see. As far as I can tell, it would be fine to reveal your special abilities. Normally, we'd consult Alice, but she has that unfortunate blind spot where the werewolves are concerned. You could remind Rachel that secrecy is required, if you suspect she might speak out of turn."

"I will, then. Thank you, Carlisle."

Edward and Esme heard, of course, but said nothing. I sat down at the computer.

_Hi Rachel,_  
_I have something to tell you, but it's going to be a little weird, so I'd better give you some background._  
_You already know that a lot of my family have special talents, especially talents that involve seeing things or knowing things. That's something that can unexpectedly happen when you join a family like ours._

As always, I avoided any direct, literal reference to vampires, as Rachel avoided mentioning werewolves except by way of metaphor. You never knew who might accidentally get hold of our correspondence.

_I haven't mentioned it before, but it turns out I have something like that. It's hard to explain clearly, you understand, but you could say my talent is putting two and two together really, really well. I can figure out the solution to problems when other people can't see it at all. Not all the time, but when the mood strikes._  
_Well, sometimes my family finds this knack of mine very useful, so I let them know when I pick up information this way. It's always been completely accurate, I should add._  
_The reason I'm telling you this is that a thought came into my head this way, having to do with your brother, and I wanted to pass it along. I'm going to ask you to keep it to yourself, please, no matter what you may decide to do about it. _

I hoped I didn't sound too loopy. I decided to get to the point.

_You've told me how Jacob's been going through a kind of low period for a long time, and what he's been doing. I won't try to explain how I know this, except to repeat that it's a special talent, but here's what I know. Jacob's still with the pack, and so is Leah. They're both miserable. What they need is to be a couple. They're _supposed_ to be a couple. I know what you're going to say: Leah's not only older than Jake, she's a cranky man-hater, and Jacob doesn't want anything to do with girls or dating right now. What I say is true even so. If they get together, it will solve their other problems and they'll both be happy. They'll be happy a long time, too, since I think they're both going to keep being wolfish after they're together. They'll keep the town safe as a team._

Would she think the whole thing was nuts? I'd committed myself now; but I thought I'd moderate my statement just a little.

_I realize how this must sound, especially to someone who hasn't seen the way I can figure things out now. Can I just suggest that, if Leah comes back home again, see if you can arrange for her and Jacob to spend some time together. Try to throw them together a lot. If I'm wrong, it can't hurt, right? And if I'm right, you would be doing your brother a big favour, and Leah too. _

I read through the message, decided it was the best I could do, signed and sent it. Done. I went to sit beside Edward on the piano bench.

"You were writing to Rachel?" I nodded. "What was the message you had for her?" I explained. He left off playing and laughed. "So now your gift is being used to provide matchmaking services to the werewolves?"

"I suppose you could put it that way." He shook his head, amused. "Well, Rachel was really worried about Jake, and I had a way to help, so why wouldn't I?"

He put an arm around me. "You would, love. Of course you would."

I didn't hear from Rachel for over a week. When she did reply, she only said that she had her doubts, but would try what I suggested. It couldn't hurt, she agreed. However, Leah wouldn't be back again until the end of semester, so it would have to wait. Our messages continued, but no more was said about Jacob.

Four more happy months went by. The two year and accelerated three year programmes drew to an end, the family's four college students wrote their final exams, received their inevitable straight A's, attended their commencement exercises. Carlisle and Esme showed up to play the role of proud parents as each of them received their diplomas. Carlisle gave notice at the hospital, which was sincerely sorry to lose him, Esme withdrew from her volunteer activities, and we all began gradually dismantling the house and preparing for departure.

This would be the first time I'd been present when the Cullens relocated. I learned that it was usual to leave or discard most of their material possessions, and start fresh at their new location. Storage was arranged for the items which the owners couldn't bear to give up: my violin and my little Ferrari, the antique dining table, Edward's music collection, some jewelry and keepsakes, a selection of favourite paintings including the ones Carlisle kept in his study, and a few other odds and ends. Everything else, all the furniture, most of the clothing, was given to charity.

Edward and I cleared out the inside of our renovated barn last of all. "I should feel sad about leaving it behind, I suppose," I said thoughtfully, as I dismantled furniture, "but I don't. It's important because it was our first home; but it's not the house that matters, it's us being together, and we get to take that with us wherever we go." I looked at him to see if he understood what I meant, but he dropped the headboard he was carrying, wrapped me in his arms and kissed me. So I guess he understood.

That night, as I lay in Edward's arms during one of our quiet pauses, I took a step I'd been planning on for days. "Edward, I want to show you something." He waited patiently, and I braced myself. I'd made a discovery while working to develop my shield. It felt as if I'd found a way to lift the shield, to remove it and open my mind to whatever forces might want to enter it. "I don't know for sure if this will work," I warned him.

"If what will work?" he asked.

"Just watch." I felt a little resistance. My shield seemed to want to remain in place; it was like lifting a trap door that had a spring mechanism in it, pulling it forcefully shut. I wondered if my gift was somehow represented in my personality, the way I'd always hated attention, tended to close myself off from others. It disturbed me a little to allow anyone, even Edward, direct access to my mind. I looked into Edward's eyes, and my reluctance faded. I gave a final push, and the shield lifted away.

Edward gasped. "Bella! Is that...?"

"I figured out how to take my shield away," I said. "At least, I thought I did. I guess it's working?"

"Yes! I can see...oh, sweetheart, your mind is as beautiful as the rest of you."

I'd prepared for this moment. I let my thoughts move on from Edward's face and voice, and run through my memories of him. I showed him my first sight of him; the first time we spoke; our trip to the meadow, when we'd confessed our love to one another. I set aside our terrible time apart, and only showed him how I felt when he came back to me. I remembered his proposal; our wedding; cherished moments from our honeymoon. I showed him how I'd felt when I opened my eyes after my three days of burning, and found him there beside me. I showed him _himself_, as I saw him.

Edward stared at me, taking it all in, his expression rapt. At last, unable to contain himself, he pulled me closer and kissed me passionately. He stopped and pulled away as my thoughts became inaccessible again. "I can't do it if I'm distracted," I explained.

"I understand. Should I stop distracting you?"

"No," I said, pulling him closer. "We can try again later."

* * *

The big white farmhouse stood empty, its sale having been placed in the hands of professionals. Just before sunrise we ran to Bohemian Lodge, which was also completely empty. Each of us carried a backpack containing the essentials: some practical clothing, a selection of passports and ID documents, credit cards and cash in multiple currencies, and the usual array of electronic devices. We were setting out with the most minimal of luggage because this time, we were planning to travel vampire style. We were going to run.

There was some doubt about the practicality of the idea when Kate first brought it up, but she won us over. Personally, I liked the idea from the start. I loved to run. Kate's argument was that we would avoid all the hassles of going through airports, eluding security devices, hiding our multiple passports. "We can take a plane coming back, if you want," she said at our two-family summit meeting, "but why not do it the easy way going?" She proposed running west all the way to Alaska, crossing the Bering Strait, and proceeding through Siberia and Russia to whatever European locales we cared to visit.

Everyone was finally sold on this approach. Once we were established inside Europe, we could live like civilized human tourists. For the first leg of our journey, however, we were going to be 100% vampire.

It took us almost twenty-four hours to run to the west coast of Alaska, but the trip wasn't tedious. Without fatigue as a factor, running wasn't much different from spending a day together in a house, except that the scenery kept changing. We talked, sometimes sang, once engaged in a kind of leapfrog, jumping over each other as we ran.

At one point Kate reminded me that I'd taken a raincheck on the rock climbing challenge, and we paused long enough for the two of us to enjoy a race to the top of a cliff. Kate won, but not by much. I cheered her along with the rest.

We paused when we reached the jumping-off point on the Alaskan coast. Crossing the strait had been the aspect of our trip which required the most discussion. We hadn't wanted to swim across, because our luggage would be soaked, but other means of transportation were problematic. We couldn't present ourselves in Russia as ordinary tourists, since foreigners weren't allowed to just turn up in a boat. Jasper thought he might be able to produce convincing paperwork, but the possibility of having our luggage searched made us decide entering the country secretly would be best. That meant swimming.

At the coast, we paused and removed the necessary waterproofing equipment from our backpacks. Valuables inside had been carefully sealed in watertight containers before we left. We now sealed up our backpacks as well. "This is going to be the slowest part of the entire trip," Rosalie grumbled. It was the first time she'd spoken since we had set out. One of her bad days, apparently.

"I guess it's a good day to be just running for hours," I said to her sympathetically.

I expected her to snarl and walk away. She did snarl, a little, but she also said, "Yeah, I guess it is," and gave me a tight half smile before turning her back. It wasn't exactly a major therapeutic breakthrough, but the family glanced at me approvingly and Emmett patted my head.

In order to avoid detection by border patrol, we aimed for a landing point which would be dangerous for any boat to approach, an area with a steep, rocky coast and strong currents, a little to the north of the strait. We emerged from the water onto a deserted shore, unwrapped our backpacks, and resumed running, our clothing gradually drying in the late-night sun and rushing wind. We travelled west, prepared for another long run. Far eastern Russia was not a place that received many tourists, and we didn't want to arouse suspicion by showing up in a town, thirteen American tourists with no explanation of how they came to be in the country.

We continued to talk as we ran. I found myself running beside Irina, and we fell into a conversation about Jane Austen and her place in literature.

"Of course, all her stories are love stories, primarily," Irina said. "Maybe that's why they're not taken seriously."

"They're not taken seriously because they're written entirely from a woman's perspective," Tanya put in.

"Aren't there plenty of female authors who are respected?" I asked.

"It's not that Austen's a woman, it's that she writes only about women's concerns. The house, the family, love, marriage, children. Even if those things can affect an entire family's safety and happiness, they're not considered serious subject. Not like bullfighting," she smirked.

"Tanya's not a Hemingway fan," Irina explained.

"Or a fan of the manly-man image, I bet," I said.

Tanya laughed. "You're quite right, I admit it."

"So if Jane Austen had written about bullfighting..."

They both laughed. "it doesn't seem likely, does it?" Irina said. "Although she'd probably have some amusing things to say about the practice."

"_I'd_ like to hear what she would have written about Hemingway," Tanya added. She was drawn into a different conversation at that point, and Irina and I continued.

"Then again, a lot of love stories are considered great literature," Irina said, continuing her original point.

"Mostly tragic love stories, I think."

She considered. "You may be right. In the highly regarded love stories, somebody dies. Or they're separated by cruel fate."

I nodded. "Or by one another's stupidity, or some misunderstanding. The love story part comes first, but it has to be followed up by a lot of suffering."

"Maybe the suffering justifies the earlier happiness, and that qualifies it as great literature."

"I hope literary critics aren't quite that dark!"

She laughed. "Maybe not; but it does seem to go that way. First the love, then the unhappiness. Jane Austen's stories all go in the opposite direction. First the unhappiness, the confusion, the struggle, then ultimately, love and a happy ending. Austen liked everyone to end up happy, especially in love. Maybe because she didn't have much success in that area herself. She gave us love stories everyone would like to be part of."

"Yeah. Romeo and Juliet may be better as literature, but it's not something you'd want to experience for real. Austen's stories are love stories you'd actually want to live. Work through the difficulties and finally find true love and live happily ever after."

"The happily ever after part is never written," Irina observed. "It would be unreadable. Good to live through in real life, maybe, but incredibly boring as a work of fiction."

"That's probably true," I agreed.

"Not that I'm an authority," she added. "I've never been that close to anyone."

"Really? Never?" I was surprised.

"Oh, no. My sisters and I, we like to play with our human men, but we keep our distance. Not literal distance, you understand," she added with a smirk.

"I understand," I laughed. "Emotional distance, you mean."

"Exactly."

"But why? I mean, why is it so important that you stay, er, unattached?"

She was silent a long time. "I'm sorry," I said. "It's none of my business."

"No, it's all right. Sometimes I wonder the same thing. It comes from our lives as human women, I suppose. Tanya sees the way we live as freedom, and power. Usually I see it that way, too. I've thought of finding a mate. At one time, I thought Laurent and I might...but to be honest, he wasn't interested in more than friendship. I may have read things into it that weren't really there. I suppose," she said wistfully, "I haven't completely given up on a happy ending of my own."

We moved on to a more in depth discussion of some of Austen's minor characters. Irina and I were completely of one mind, at least on the topic of Jane Austen.


	19. To Russia With Love

We were planning to run straight through as far as Moscow, but since it was the dark of night and we could pass through unseen, we took a short detour through the city of Yakutsk. The place started its life as a Cossack garrison, later became a Soviet prison camp, and now looked like a city that was once a Cossack garrison and a Soviet prison camp. We took in the statue of Lenin, the rows of stark modern buildings, and a few surprising features, like the imitation Wild West saloon, a brightly lit disco, and a theatre which, I was told, bore posters advertising its local opera company.

"_Every place_ has an opera company!" I exclaimed as we continued our run. "Why did I never notice that before?"

Before turning to the south-west, we all stopped to hunt, the wildlife in this area being especially plentiful and diverse. Some of the more attractive predators were, regretfully, in short supply, but there was plenty of bear and deer, including reindeer. We fed well, and I managed to keep my clothing neat in the process. We ran on.

Carmen and Eleazar helped me practice my Spanish, the language I'd chosen to learn first and was already fairly fluent in; then Edward coached me in French, which I was just starting to learn. I saw Jasper hide a smile; apparently he was well aware of the effect Edward's voice speaking French had on me. Edward smirked as he picked up the same information second hand. I reminded myself we had a long journey ahead of us before we could be alone together, and focused on irregular verbs.

Another 400 miles farther west.

In Siberia, we made a short detour at Carlisle's request, to visit a genetic research facility whose work interested him. Unable to contact the staff openly and request information, he broke into their offices, with our help; copied their files onto a disc; and left again without anyone becoming aware of his presence.

"My father, the police chief, would be horrified," I joked to Carlisle as we continued, his illicit data carefully packed. I winced inwardly at the reminder of Charlie, and saw Edward glance at Jasper as he picked up my reaction. "Just as I was getting past the dangerous years, I pull my first B & E."

"It's a little more serious than that," Emmett said. "It probably counts as espionage. No gateway misdemeanours for _you,_ little sister_._"

"Does participating in this make you uneasy?" Carlisle asked. "I should have made it clear you were under no obligation to assist."

"No, I was only joking. I don't think it counts as theft."

"Why is that?" Edward asked. "Not that I disagree, but I like to hear your perspective."

"Well...first, Carlisle didn't actually take anything from them. They still have all their files intact; he just made copies. They'll never know we were there." He nodded. "Second, any of the reasons they'd worry about having their data taken don't apply here. Carlisle isn't going to claim it as his own research; he's not going to release it to the press; he's not even going to use it for an alternate branch of human research. Whatever use he makes of the files, nobody in the human world will ever know about it. It might as well have been taken by aliens who brought it back to their home planet."

"That was my own thinking," Carlisle said, "apart from the outer space metaphor."

"Is this for your own research?" I asked him.

"Yes. I'm trying to compare human with vampire DNA and determine how the transformation process occurs."

That conversation took us another hour inland. Carlisle and Esme drifted a little away from the main group, engaged in a private conversation. I ran smoothly along, taking in everything at once - Edward running at my side; every detail of the terrain; the conversations of the others; the joyful experience of my own speed and strength - while at the same time thinking over several things at once. "It still makes you unhappy to remember your father," Edward said quietly.

I glanced at Jasper, who was running several yards ahead of us. "Yes and no," I answered. He looked at me expectantly. "I'm still getting used to the way things get stored here." I tapped my head. "The way I can sort of put things away if I'm busy with something else. Like when I was first changed, and I could forget about my thirst completely, but if anyone mentioned it, suddenly it was right in the centre of my thoughts. You know what I'm talking about."

"Of course."

"It's like...there's an infinite number of rooms in my head, each holding different memories and thoughts and feelings; and my parents are kept in this big closet. Usually the door is kept closed, but whenever something causes it to open, all the old sadness falls out, and has to be put away again." I looked at him. "It never gets any _less_ sad, really; but as time goes on, I'm adding more and more things to the closet. All the memories I'm saving from my human days, all the nice things about them, you know? And they all fall out together; not just the sadness, but the good things, too. Does that make any sense at all?"

He smiled. "Yes, perfect sense."

When the various conversations hit a lull at the same time, we sang, choosing more and more complex songs and varying the harmony in a number of ways. "An awful lot of show tunes," I noted, after everyone had joined in on part of the score from Oklahoma.

"That's where most popular music came from, for years and years," Alice said. "The idea that show tunes are some kind of effete specialty music is a new thing. _Everybody_ used to play and sing music from Broadway musicals."

"'Don't cry for me, Argenti-i-ina...!'" Emmett boomed defiantly in his melodious but decidedly masculine bass voice. The others joined in, and I stifled my giggles and sang along. My modern viewpoint had no special authority, not in this family. We went on to harmonize through the score from Anything Goes, then Kate led us through Bohemian Rhapsody.

Another 400 miles inland.

Rosalie started to come out of her funk when we were due north of Vladivostock. "The thing about the Camaro..." she was saying to Alice as I tuned in to their discussion. I ran easily, listening to all the various conversations at once.

"...but if Babe Ruth hadn't been traded to the Yankees..."

"...so then Tallulah Bankhead comes into the room, waving an empty champagne bottle..."

"...but the hospital refused to let me perform the surgery, because the woman's health insurance..."

"...two ducks walk into a bar..."

I ended up running next to Tanya. She gave me a mischievous smile and suddenly leapt over my head as we ran, ending up on my left. I laughed and leapt over her in turn. She jumped once more, and ended up standing on my shoulders as I ran. "Jump, Tanya," I instructed her, and she jumped into midair. I caught her deftly on one hand and ran carrying her on an upraised palm, like a waiter with a tray. She somersaulted off, landing on her feet and continuing to run as the others gave us a smattering of applause.

"We would have done well in the circus, wouldn't we, cousin?" she said, grinning. She veered to one side in order to leap over a tall outcropping of rock, apparently out of sheer high spirits. I followed her, then we both returned to the original path.

"It's beautiful here, don't you think?" she asked me.

"It is, in a way. At least, it's a kind of landscape that's growing on me." The place had a kind of desolate grandeur about it.

"The mountains remind me a little bit of my homeland."

"Really?" I turned to her. "I thought you were from much further west."

"Oh, yes. And apart from the mountains, it was green and temperate, and the countryside full of pastures and ploughed fields, not like this." She gestured at the rocky terrain. She talked for a little while about the town she was born in, what she could remember of it. She painted it as a peaceful and pleasant community, but one which became oppressive to her as she grew older.

"Why?" I asked her.

"My family started pressing me to get married. I had turned down offers from two different men. I was happy as I was, and besides, I was afraid to marry." The very faint Slavic accent that sometimes tinged her standard American English became a little more pronounced as she talked about her past. "The local boys were fun to flirt with, and were not bad people, really, but I didn't want to hand my life over to one of them. I saw the way men in the village treated their wives. And I was terrified of childbirth. I wanted to stay single, but that was seen as a shame on myself and my family. Unless I became a nun, and I knew," she said dryly, "that I was not cut out to be a nun. So I had a difficult decision to make."

"What did you decide?" I asked.

"I didn't. The decision was taken out of my hands when my mother, Sasha, changed me and made me her companion."

"Oh." I wanted to ask how she had felt about being chosen that way, but didn't want to offend her. She seemed to understand what I was thinking.

"I didn't mind, at least, not once I'd become used to the idea. It solved my problem very neatly, for one thing." She laughed. "No more difficult choices. I didn't have to marry, or become a nun, or even be a spinster and give up men. I found I could flirt all I liked, and there would be no village gossips to say I was a bad girl. Later on, I found I could do much more than flirt, as often as I wanted. Men were mine to choose, and enjoy, and leave behind." She grinned at me. "Today people would say it was _empowering._ I suppose that's right. My life was very narrow when I was human, and becoming narrower all the time, even while I was still young, and all because of the need to maintain propriety, to be what women were expected to be. All those boundaries disappeared when Sasha chose me."

"That makes sense,"I said. "And your sisters...?"

"They were from the same region I was, and had much the same kind of life. They followed my example." She laughed suddenly. "I remember an old lady in my home village, a nasty old lady who liked to catch young women being inappropriate. 'No boy is safe from forward girls like you!' she told me once, shaking her finger in my face, "and other girls will follow your bad example!" She had no idea how true her words would turn out to be!" She studied me. "But that kind of life doesn't sound like fun to you, does it?"

"I can see how it would be, especially after what you told me about your home. But...it's like chocolate and vanilla, that's all." She looked puzzled. "It's just not to my taste."

"Yes, I see that. That is why you belong with Edward. You are both the same in that regard, aren't you?"

"I think so." I hoped she wouldn't pursue the subject.

"Good. Well, I will enjoy my chocolate, and you your vanilla; but that's no reason we can't be good friends, is it?"

"No reason at all." I smiled at her. Her stupendous number of sexual conquests aside, I liked Tanya very much.

"Tell me about the town _you_ come from," she urged.

I told her about Phoenix, trying to keep it brief, but she asked searching questions, actually interested, it seemed, in my very ordinary childhood and adolescence in Arizona. "Living in the desert," she marvelled. "That is one kind of environment I haven't spent any time in. Did you really like it?"

"I loved it. I thought it was so beautiful, in a minimal way. And it was always hot and sunny, all year round."

"Do you miss the sunshine?"

"No, not at all. I missed it when I first moved up north, to Washington; but now I'm always warm, and it's always bright, even at night; so it's just like being in Phoenix all the time, wherever I go." I looked around at the chilly expanse of rocky soil and snow-topped hills, now as pleasant to me as a sun-dappled beach in California.

"You're a very positive person," she suggested.

"It's easy to be positive when you have everything you want." I glanced over at Edward as I spoke, and saw him watching me, smiling. I smiled back, filled with the joy that always came with his being there. It never seemed to grow less.

When we were about two hours from Moscow, we took a break from running and perched together on some secluded cliffs. We briefly went over our cover story for the time we were in Russia, and made sure all our paperwork was in order. Our forged papers indicated we had travelled together from the U.S. to London, and then from one tourist centre after another, finally flying into Moscow from Helsinki. Our current cover story made us rich Americans with a lot of free time, taking an extended vacation. We carried airline tickets and passports with stamps from all the appropriate stops, along with the required tourist visas. Jasper had been very thorough.

We ran the final stretch, during which Edward taught me a few useful phrases in Russian. We began to dodge around buildings and change direction as we passed through the suburbs of Moscow, staying out of sight as we ran. We stopped behind a bus terminal to put our shoes on before continuing into the city proper, then walked slowly, human speed, through the crowded streets. Now we were just a group of tourists checking out the sights and looking for a place to stay for the night.

We exchanged currency and walked toward the city's central hub, where we could supposedly find a five star hotel close to the Bolshoi Theatre. I looked around eagerly at the mixture of peculiar old buildings, domed cathedrals, functional but dull Soviet-era structures, and brand new hotels and restaurants catering to tourists; and at the people, both locals and tourists, wearing anything from workmen's coveralls to designer suits, quite a few wheeling luggage along the sidewalk. Street musicians and performers appeared here and there, along with the occasional outright beggar. I dropped a folded bill into the nearly empty hat of a dejected looking man who played Tea for Two over and over on a battered concertina.

We found the hotel, and approached the desk. I looked around at the immense, gorgeously decorated lobby. "Wow! I guess they no longer have a problem with the Western capitalist decadence thing."

Edward laughed. "You think they crossed the line between opulent and ostentatious?"

"Maybe just a little."

"Hotels like this are _trying_ for ostentation, really," Esme said. "It's for the benefit of a certain brand of tourist. This lobby is meant to announce, 'people who stay here are big shots.' It's both decor and advertisement. You can't judge it by the same standards as a home interior."

"I guess that makes sense."

Carmen chuckled. "British aristocracy used to insult the _nouveau riche_ by saying their luxurious homes were 'like expensive hotels'."

"Does the ostentation bother you?" Esme asked. "I know you've been uncomfortable, in the past, with signs of material wealth. What do you think of all this?"

I understood it was a serious question, and tried to answer honestly. "It's gorgeous, of course. Other than that, I'm not quite sure what I think of it. It's not the kind of thing I was used to in my other life, you know. Mom and I weren't exactly poor, but we had to economize. When I was human, I'd probably have had objections to staying in places like this, but most of my issues don't apply any more. Money isn't a concern, and it's not like we're trying to show off for anybody." I shrugged. "I think I just felt odd being given those things, but I don't any more."

"Bella's gotten over her issues with nice clothes as well," Alice said happily. "You should have seen her shopping with me in New York."

"So it wasn't Marxist leanings that held you back?" Rosalie asked with an impish smile. "Just an aristocratic disdain for vulgar display?"

"I don't think I want to admit to either one," I told her, and she laughed and patted my shoulder.

The concierge seemed put off by our minimal luggage, but Tanya explained that we limited ourselves to carry-ons coming into Europe so we could take home all our intended purchases. She followed up by asking him where the best shopping districts were, and he was content. He apologized at not being able to offer us eight rooms all on the same floor, and we were given our key cards and directed to the elevators.

The rooms were elegant but simple, not showy at all. "Esme, I think you're right," I told her, looking out into the corridor as she and Carlisle opened the door to their own room. "The lobby was an ad. The rooms aren't flashy at all."

She looked inside. "No, you're right. They're very tasteful."

"Are we going back out?" Irina asked, approaching us from the end of the corridor, where her own room was.

It was daytime, and we agreed to do a little sightseeing. "We usually try to be out during regular mealtimes," Edward explained, "so hotel staff didn't start to wonder why we never eat anything."

We'd agreed that our stay in Russia would be a short one. There was too much regular scrutiny of tourists' paperwork here, too many rules and security checks. Alice had seen clear sailing during our stay, but there were vague, potential problems clouding her visions, and we didn't want to take chances. Accordingly, we'd chosen the main things we wanted to visit in advance. Skip the Soviet sites, we all agreed. "Dreary and sad," Alice said. "Same with anything produced in Maoist China. Can't anyone champion the proletariat without losing their aesthetic sense completely?"

"And let's give Lenin's Tomb a miss," Rosalie added. "I never did understand why it's so popular."

"If you've seen one dead Russian, you've seen them all," Kate agreed.

Swan Lake was being performed at the Bolshoi Theatre the following evening, and everyone chose to go if we could get tickets. "Even if you don't care for ballet," Edward told me, "you can't turn down a chance to see Swan Lake in Moscow; and you _have_ to see the inside of the Bolshoi."

"I'm happy to go," I told him. "I imagine Swan Lake is what you'd call a good first ballet." Esme laughed, and agreed that it was.

Fortunately our concierge was able to oblige with thirteen tickets on short notice, nine in the orchestra and four in the first balcony. We accepted, and headed back outside. We walked together to the attractions we all agreed on. First, the Tretyakov Gallery, where I stared at the faces of centuries-old portraits, wondering what the subjects had thought about while sitting by the hour having their portraits painted. Probably not the most insightful thing to think about while viewing old masters. Irina and Carmen talked technique and contemporary artistic influences and professional patronage - and they also, I was kind of pleased to hear, wondered what the people in portraits might have been thinking about while they were posing.

We viewed St. Basil's Cathedral next. "We could hardly _avoid_ seeing it," Carlisle said, looking up at the multicoloured domes, "even if we wanted to. It's the gaudiest thing I've ever laid eyes on."

"Your Oliver Cromwell would have gone into seizures at the sight of it," Edward joked.

"Cromwell would have had it burned to the ground," Carlisle replied, studying the building. "I have no such impulse. It's not to my taste, but I have to admire the zeal that must have inspired it." Edward caught my eye, and we both smiled at this very typically Carlisle-like answer.

After leaving St. Basil's we broke up into smaller groups to visit the sites of interest to each: art galleries, the Pushkin Museum, a paleontology display, a martial arts demonstration. Esme and Kate planned to see the fifteenth century palace of Ivan III, a place not normally open to the public, but which they were confident they could enter and leave without attracting notice. They brought Rosalie along in case they needed to disable any security cameras or alarm systems.

I had to smile at this casual blurring of the lines between public and private spaces. "Those _authorized personnel only_ signs are just a challenge for you, aren't they?"

Kate laughed. "My new life came with a permanent, all-access pass to everything, as far as I'm concerned."

"I remember Edward telling me about the musicians he got to meet backstage, by using a little subterfuge."

Alice grinned. "Esme would manage the same thing just by saying 'I'm with the band!'" Esme swatted her in good-natured protest.

"We won't do the place any harm," Rosalie said, "and it's good practice for us, dealing with a variety of security systems."

Edward and I set out together. I wanted to see the Dostoevsky museum, and Edward was set on the former home of a composer he liked, someone named Scriabin. We visited both, then wandered the streets hand in hand, taking in the more everyday sights and sounds. As late afternoon turned to evening, and we passed through an area filled with bars, restaurants, and what appeared to be nightclubs, we began to see clusters of young people in imaginative clothing, gathering in parks and doorways. I caught a familiar scent. "Alice is nearby."

Edward nodded. "I picked up her thoughts a few minutes ago. She's hoping to get everyone out to the clubs tonight."

I looked around at the establishments whose lights were just starting to come on, colourful places called Golubtsi and Cowboy Chic and Vertigo, and a few with signs in Cyrillic I couldn't yet decipher. There were also some incongruous places, like traditional looking Irish pubs, and a couple of buildings with signs that read 'XXX' and 'adult.' "I wouldn't mind, but...I was looking forward to being alone with you after that long trip."

He sighed. "I'm looking forward to that as well. Perhaps we could join the others, but leave by midnight?"

"Like Cinderella," I agreed, "but for different reasons."

Alice caught up with us at that point. "Come on!" she said, waving shopping bags. "I've got everyone's clubwear. We're all going back to the hotel to change." She skipped past us, and we followed after.

We moved casually from one venue to another, taking twenty minutes or so to check out each place before moving on. The clubs in Anchorage hadn't prepared me for the weirdness that was Moscow nightlife. Clothing was more eccentric, and there were a few people who seemed to be in costume, like a man in a druid-style robe and a tall hat with a plume, or the young woman in a catsuit and tiara. There was a certain amount of contrived gaiety, as in a club called Detente that pumped soap bubbles into the air to float around its dancing patrons, and some self-conscious showing off, but that probably went with the territory.

Not having interacted much with humans since my change, I was surprised to find men at each bar approaching me and trying to strike up a conversation. I kept saying _Ya ne govoryu po'Russki_ - 'I don't speak Russian' - one of the few Russian phrases Edward had taught me, but it didn't deter even those who spoke no English. They just switched to pantomime. It took me a while to recognize that they now saw me as humans had always seen the Cullens: strikingly attractive. "I think guys are trying to hit on me," I told Edward uncomfortably.

He raised an eyebrow. "Not to seem indifferent, but that's only to be expected, love. You _have_ looked in a mirror lately, haven't you?"

I rolled my eyes. "I know. I'm one of you now. I'm just not used to that kind of attention. From anyone but you, I mean."

"I'm afraid you'll have to get used to it. They're not being offensive, are they?"

"I don't think so. They just keep trying to talk to me and buy me drinks."

"Then just put them off nicely if you can, or harshly if you have to. It's something we all have to put up with. Some more than others." He nodded at the far end of the room. As I watched, Carlisle smiled politely at a pretty girl who was clutching his arm and asking him something. "_Spasybo, no nyet,_" he told her, only to be approached seconds later by another girl. "_Nyet, spasybo_," he said, moving away quickly.

Midnight struck as we were dancing in the fifth club of the night. Kate had already left with a tourist from Dallas, and Tanya had just hit the dance floor with her fishing lure routine, when Edward whispered in my ear, "Shall we go?" I nodded, and we moved through the crowd to the exit. I took a couple of deep breaths, easing the burn in my throat. Even though I was coping with the scent of humans well, it was always a relief to get out of crowded buildings. We walked back to the hotel, and I tried not to rush as we made our way up to the eighth floor. Once we were inside our room and the door was closed, Edward immediately pulled me into an embrace. "Bella," he whispered in my ear. It was the last thing either of us said, at least the last intelligible thing, for over two hours.

In the morning, we gradually emerged from our rooms and gathered, one or two at a time, in the hotel's smoking lounge, where we compared notes from the previous day and made plans. "I have the ballet tickets," Esme said, "so meet in the theatre lobby between 7:30 and 7:45, please."

"What's everyone doing today?" Emmett asked.

Everybody had places to go: more museums, more historic sites, a tour of the Kremlin. a street fair. Alice, with her usual uncanny knack for finding odd, unexpected people and places everywhere she went, had some interesting stops she wanted to make, and Jasper, Edward, Tanya and I decided to let her be our tour guide for the day.

Alice's first stop was the tiny, shabby little shop of a watchmaker, one who made timepieces painstakingly by hand. They were little works of art, and I immediately insisted on buying one for Edward. "Only fair," I said. "Consider this my Tiffany's." He obligingly pointed out his favourite, a simple round watch with a hand painted face, the numerals interwoven with a subtle geometric pattern. The watchmaker accepted cash only, so I had to go out to a bank and return, but Edward got his watch.

"You've certainly got over your aversion to shopping," Alive observed as we left the shop.

I shrugged. "It's more fun buying things for other people."

"I know! Why do you think I always wanted to buy things for _you_?"

We followed Alice to a building some distance from the city centre, a kind of oversized barn-like structure whose actual purpose I wasn't sure of. It appeared to be deserted, but she led us to a back door, which was propped open. A small cluster of people stood inside, watching. The interior was a large, open space, and it was occupied by a motley group of people engaged in various feats of skill or balance. Two men rode unicycles around and around the perimeter, women performed graceful acrobatics on a low tightrope, a pair of jugglers were throwing a gradually increasing number of pins back and forth. "The Northwestern Federal District Circus," Alice explained happily. "Their rehearsals are unofficially open to the public."

We watched as the stunts became increasingly complicated, until the fire eater doused his flaming swords and the troupe seemed to call for a lunch break. We applauded and left the building.

That evening, wearing the clothes Alice had obtained for the purpose, we saw Swan Lake. I was a little surprised at how much the swans came across as swans - aggressive, territorial birds who were beautiful but dangerous. Maybe it was just the way this production was staged. The costumes were gorgeous, and the sets and the music great, but the dancing didn't impress me as much as I'd expected. I said as much afterward, when Tanya asked me how I liked the performance.

"Yes, that's unavoidable," she said, screwing up her face in an exaggeration of disappointment. "Humans will never look as graceful and agile as they would look to other humans."

"I liked it otherwise, though," I said, "although I don't know if I'll ever be a big Tchaikovsky fan. And the theatre is really something." The Bolshoi Theatre had the most impressive interior I'd ever seen.

We stayed on one more day, went to a concert the following night, and checked out in the morning. Now that we were using hotels and taking on the appearance of human tourists, we would be staying indoors at night, travelling during the day. That meant Edward and me having nights to ourselves, which suited me. After some discussion, we agreed that, since we still had almost no luggage, we'd skip the tedious process of leaving Russia by plane and slip away on foot. We put on our backpacks and walked to the outskirts of the city, then darted invisibly from building to building until we reached the countryside and could run uninterrupted. From there we travelled directly to Prague.


	20. Via Italia

Moscow had been a mixed bag, mundane streets and buildings interspersed with remarkable landmarks. Central Prague seemed to be nothing _but_ landmarks, a city consisting of ornate historical structures everywhere you looked. "This is so amazing," I said, taking in the sights. "It looks imaginary."

Rosalie laughed at my astonishment. "This is just a city street, Bella. You look like_ such_ a tourist!"

I shrugged. "I've never been anywhere like this. Phoenix and Forks, Washington was about it until last year. This is like...Europe!" Moscow had seemed kind of transitional; this place was intensely European.

Prague was a very architectural experience. Even the hotel we were staying at was itself an historic building, the rooms like something from a castle, except with indoor plumbing. We stayed five days, wandering eventually into neighbouring towns, taking in the look of the city as well as the usual museums and galleries. Alice pointed us to a museum of miniatures, which was weird but fun, every display requiring the use of a magnifying glass or microscope to see. Alice got a little annoyed after strangers repeatedly walked up to her and jokingly asked if she was one of the exhibits. "Everybody's a comedian," she muttered.

We all went together to the National Gallery, where I saw the originals of paintings I'd only seen printed in books before. I stood studying a portrait of a young woman in a nineteenth century gown, with a whippet lying at her feet, when Edward approached and stood beside me. "What do you think of it?"

I smiled. "I'm sure you know a thousand times more about this painting than I do."

"But I don't know what _you_ think."

I shrugged. "I have no idea."

He laughed. "'She knows all about art, but she doesn't know what she likes'," he misquoted.

"I _don't_ know anything about art. That's the point."

"But do you like it?" When I hesitated, he said, "Bella, you must be able to tell me_ that_ much."

"Yes, I like it; but I know that I like it for the wrong reasons." I realized that Esme, Carmen and Irina, the artistic members of the family, were nearby and could hear the conversation.

He laughed. "There are wrong reasons?"

"You know what I mean." He shook his head, grinning. "Well...when I look at this painting, I like it because it's pretty, and because I like the lady. She has an interesting face. I think things like, 'wasn't that dress uncomfortable?' I wonder what she named her dog. I notice how the dog sort of rests against her; he likes her. I think that she looks like she didn't want her portrait done; maybe somebody told her to do it. I think about what her life might have been like. And then, just now, I was thinking about passages in novels I've read where someone posed for a portrait."

Carmen moved over to stand near us, looking at the portrait. "It's not entirely wrong, you know, even from the perspective of a genuine art snob," she told me. "A portrait is a special category of art. The purpose is to reveal the person being painted. You are looking at it more or less the way it was intended."

"Not really for paintings other than portraits, though," I said. "At least, I think that's the case."

"Usually so, but it's not a complicated thing. Looking past the subject matter and seeing how the artist achieved his effects is something that can be learned easily enough. But I think you will always be more a literary person than an artistic one."

We took our time looking at the exhibits, and prepared to leave. "Go to the ladies' room on the ground floor first," Tanya advised. "If you look out the window, you can see the famous cemetery all the tour guides mention. You can get a glimpse without the boredom of walking through the thing. It's a little overrated." I did as she suggested, and found two other women peering through the window at the same time. One of those tour guides must have mentioned the bathroom window option.

We attended _Die Walkure_ at the insanely ornate state opera theatre. "A good third opera?" I asked Esme beforehand.

She grimaced. "Not really, no; but it's the one they're presenting right now; and it's worth it to see the inside of the opera house."

"Anyway," Edward added, "you'll have to face Wagner sooner or later."

Actually, I kind of got a kick out of the Valkyrie, who looked like female warrior characters from a video game, and whose introductory scene involved dragging dead soldiers around the battlefield by their hair while they argued with each other. "Vicious swans, scary supernatural battle girls - I thought opera was mostly about pretty things," I commented as we walked back to the hotel.

Tanya snorted. "That's because it's new to you. Opera tells some gritty tales. You noticed how our hero Siegfried came into the world, right? Incest between fraternal twins." I made a face, and she laughed. "Opera's a nonstop cavalcade of murder, rape, evil schemes, infidelity, misery and disaster. The music might be pretty, but the stories they're telling generally aren't."

"What did you think of the music?" Edward asked.

"I agree with the guy who said Wagner's music is better than it sounds." Everyone seemed to enjoy that. "Actually, it wasn't bad. I'd like to see the rest of the whatever-it's-called series."

"The Ring Cycle," Edward supplied. "I'm sure we'll get the chance eventually."

We took a train from Prague to Austria, a new experience for me, in this life or the previous one. It travelled much slower than I could run, but it did give me a chance to practice being human. I watched the slowly moving scenery, so different from anything I'd seen at home.

Vienna was another city that looked like something imaginary, full of imposing palaces and ornate cathedrals and centuries-old buildings. Our hotel was the former palace of an Austrian duke and duchess, and was so grand that even the impossibly sumptuous interiors seemed merely appropriate, rather than excessive.

We spent a couple of weeks in Austria. While we visited museums and galleries, of which there were an abundance, Vienna was rightly known as a musical city. We went to concerts almost every evening, and the opera twice. Edward recommended performances with me in mind, since it would be my first time hearing most of this music live. On the grounds that we should hear German operas while in Vienna, and save the Italian ones for Italy, we attended Abduction from the Seraglio and Lohengrin. Against all reasonable expectation, I was becoming an opera enthusiast.

We took a break from classical music halfway through the trip, and attended a concert given by a band that had been very big in Phoenix when I was in school there, and which was performing in a baroque theatre. Opening for them was a local band whose music was interesting, but whose German lyrics sounded gloomy and foreboding. Edward told me the songs were mostly about cars and food, so maybe it's just something about the way German sounds.

Following day after day of constant exposure to beautiful, live music, I found myself humming everywhere I went. One day I began to hum a few bars from the previous night's recital, while a group of us walked down the street. Alice joined in an octave higher, then Rosalie took up the violins' part, and Edward another part, until six of us were performing a vocal version of Mozart's clarinet concerto openly in public, and _not_ in an undertone. This being Vienna, people merely smiled at us, and a few joined in for a bar or two as they passed. The city seemed to have no tolerance for going barefoot, walking on the grass, or eccentric clothing choices; but spontaneous public expressions of musical enthusiasm were considered only natural.

A few days into our visit we left the city to hunt, leaving late at night and running east to a national park in Slovakia, one with a large expanse of dense forest, where the deer population was in need of culling. We each took a deer. The woods also hosted a population of wild boar, and when Edward located one which was injured, he offered me, with the family's approval, first crack at it. The boar's scent drew me, its aggression roused my hunting instinct delightfully, the blood was closer to what I instinctively craved than the blood of deer. It was heavenly. "You were right," I told him as we ran back. "Wild boar is _fantastic_. Too bad it's not as common as deer."

Tanya paused as we left the forested area. "This is where I was born, you know; not far from here," she told me.

"I didn't realize!" I exclaimed. "Should we go and take a look?"

"If you like," she said indifferently.

Edward and I, Irina and Kate agreed to go along; the rest returned to Vienna. We ran together across the bright-dark countryside. "Has it changed very much?" I asked.

"Yes, quite a bit. Less than the cities have," Tanya said.

We ran over pastureland and rolling green hills, past woodlots and tiny lakes, and farmland interspersed with old-fashioned wooden houses and barns. It was picturesquely beautiful. "This was my village," Tanya said, stopping at the outskirts of a town. "About two hundred people when I lived here, and just eleven hundred now. Not much growth for almost a thousand years."

I looked around. "Does it look familiar?"

"No. The geography is essentially the same, of course; but as for the town, only the location is the same. I don't think there's a single building still standing from that time."

"This wasn't part of Slovakia then," Kate added. "The borders were changing a lot at that time."

"Not that we would have had any awareness of the fact," Irina said. "What prince officially held the land we were on didn't affect day to day village life."

"Did both of you live in the same village as Tanya?"

"Oh, no," Irina said. "I was a hundred miles or so to the south, and Kate in a little hamlet west of here."

"Mother found me in the woods," Kate said, and it took me a second to understand that she meant Sasha, the former leader of their family. She sighed, and she and her sisters looked sadly at each other, still grieving for their mother's loss. After a moment, Kate went on, "There used to be a great deal of forest that's been cut down now, turned to farmland. I was warned not to go too deeply into the woods, but I was gathering nuts, and wandered...but I don't suppose it would have made much difference, after all. Sasha had already decided to take me into the family."

"She wanted a little sister for me," Tanya said, looking fondly at Kate. "Katya was considered a troublesome girl in her village, so Sasha told me. She was spirited; she wanted to try new things, do more than just stay home and make bread. Mother thought she might be happier with us."

"And I was," Kate confirmed, smiling back at Tanya.

"And Irina?"

"She was unexpected. Irina died of a fever, and was brought to the graveyard."

"She died?" I repeated, puzzled.

"Yes. Well, died officially, in the same way that Edward and Esme died. Irina was thought to be dead, but her heart was still beating faintly when Sasha found her in her coffin, waiting for burial. Sasha took her and made her one of us."

"That's why I have short hair," Irina added, grinning. "They cut it to try and save me from the fever."

"Do you remember your home here?" I asked Irina.

"Not very well," she said. "I think the illness may have affected my memory. I lived in a town, which is more of a city now. I'm sure it's nothing like where I lived when I was human."

"Just the earth is the same," Tanya said. "Nothing else; not after this much time."

None of them seemed the least bit sad about that fact. Their human life was just prologue. "Shall we go home?" Irina asked, and we ran back to the west, following the vivid scent trail left by our family.

We did go bar-hopping once or twice, something a few of the family members enjoyed, and I had a close call on one occasion. One of the young men who was trying to flirt with me was a little drunk, and more reluctant than most to take no for an answer, and kept trying to convince me, in broken English, that I wanted to dance with him. "Nein, danke, nein," I said, after English had been proven ineffective. "Ich lieber nicht."

He caught my arm as I tried to walk away, laughing and continuing to chatter away in what he apparently thought was an ingratiating manner. "Freundlich sein, schöne madchen!" he pleaded, seizing my other arm as well and trying to pull me toward the dance floor. "So pretty, you be nice to me, please, okay?"

I pulled away, remembering to use only very limited force, as much as I'd have been able to use when I was human. "Leave me alone!" I told him, raising my voice. "I told you, I'm not interested!" Why was he so oblivious to that fact? Why couldn't he have given one of the three sisters a try instead? He put an arm around my waist and tried to pull me closer; I recognized that he was using a little more force than would have been comfortable for a human girl. His scent, at such close range, burned my throat. I had a sudden flash of sympathy for the cat Pepe LePew was always trying to make time with. She had the same language barrier to deal with, too.

I hesitated, wanting to appear as much at a loss as my cover story would have me be. My beau took this as encouragement. Embracing me more tightly with one arm, he slid the other hand underneath my skirt, crooning something in German that I didn't really want to understand. I reacted instantly, shoving him hard. Not nearly as hard as I could have, but harder than a human girl my size could have managed. The push launched him a few yards, fortunately into an area where the crowd was a little more sparse. He hit the floor and slid into a barstool, knocking it over onto himself, then raised his head and lay there looking dazed.

_Oh, crap_, I thought. _What did I just do?_ I could see Edward coming toward me from one direction, Jasper and Carlisle from another. I looked around at the innocent bystanders, two of whom had been knocked down by my suitor's involuntary hurtle. A few bar patrons laughed and applauded. "Ha! Eine _starke_ frau!" one young comedian yelled, putting his beer glass down so he could flex his muscles like a bodybuilder. "Vonder Voman!" He got a laugh from the people near him. "Still too subtle for you?" a British tourist called out to the man on the floor. More laughter.

_It could have been worse_, I told myself. _At least I didn't kill him. I didn't even break any bones_. Edward reached me. "We should probably go," he said. I looked up at him, worried. "It's fine," he said quietly. For the crowd's sake, he gave my amorous skunk an irritated glare, put a possessive arm around my shoulders and led me from the bar. "Ciao, Brünhilde!" a voice called out, causing another laugh. _Valkyrie references at a bar brawl_, I thought distractedly; _would that occur anywhere but Austria?_

Edward walked with me around the corner to a dark side street. The rest of the family joined us shortly. "Is there a concern?" Carlisle asked without preamble.

"It doesn't seem so," Edward answered. "No one suspects anything out of the ordinary. They saw it just as a young woman fending off an overly aggressive admirer."

"Alice?"

She shook her head. "Nothing. Even the guy Bella tossed won't mention anything peculiar about it."

"Good. We can leave it at that," Carlisle concluded.

"I'm _so_ sorry!" I said. "I didn't mean to push him so hard."

"There's no harm done, Bella," Carlisle said. "No one is suspicious; there was no blood spilled..."

"Oh!" I covered my face. "I never thought of that! Blood!"

"Don't feel badly, dear," Esme said. "The man was making a terrible nuisance of himself."

"That's for sure," Rosalie muttered darkly. "Pushy clod deserved it."

"I don't disagree," Edward said, "but a _slightly_ less robust reaction might have been better."

"I'm sorry," I said again. "Is there anything I can do?"

"There's no need to be so distressed, Bella," Carlisle said. "I'm going to suggest you take a little more practice with keeping your actions within human limits, as far as both speed and strength. Otherwise, please put it out of your mind. There was no harm done."

"I'll help you practice," Edward offered.

"You can be the lecherous stranger, Bella the poor, harassed co-ed trying to fend off his advances," Alice said, grinning.

"Practicing would require Bella to actually fend off Edward's advances," Emmett pointed out, "and I know _that's_ not going to happen."

"I could practice throwing _you_ across a room," I suggested, narrowing my eyes at Emmett. He laughed and mussed my hair.

Later, at the hotel, Edward actually did attempt to play lecherous stranger and give me a chance to practice; but we got a little caught up in the role playing, and things took another direction. We tried again in the morning, and only left the hotel room when I was confident I could estimate the force I was applying a little more accurately.

We did more shopping in Vienna than we had anywhere else so far, finally purchasing real luggage to transport our new clothes in. I agreed to one shopping trip with Alice, but she didn't press for more. She said she was holding out for Italy and Paris.

From Vienna we travelled, again by train, south toward Italy, with the intention of covering the preferred destinations in a clockwise spiral. Italy seemed to have everything the other European cities had, in concentrated form. Music, art, history, fashion, all seemed intensified. We made our first stop in Venice.

We'd been lucky as far as weather went, until now, but in Italy we ran into a series of sunny days. We were often obliged to stay indoors until evening on those occasions; but sometimes we were able to leave the hotel during daylight hours, if we could remain in the shade from one building to the next. It required caution and careful planning, but it allowed us to spend some of our sunny days inside galleries and museums, rather than in our hotel rooms. We skipped a lot of the usual tourist sites of Venice, which are outdoors; but I managed to see the Doge's palace, Roman ruins, and a lifetime's worth of artwork while the sun was blazing overhead.

I also heard Madame Butterfly for the first time, in La Fenice Theatre, an incredible experience from all angles.

_Hi Rachel,_  
_I hope you're having a good summer. It must be nice to have a long break from school. I know you like your job but a whole classroom full of kids every day must be intense._  
_I was really happy to hear in your last message about Jacob and Leah. I hope it continues to work out for them. Like I told you before, I'm extremely sure it will._  
_There hasn't been a lot of time for reading lately; there's always so much to see. We've got as far as Italy; we're leaving Venice tomorrow and going on to Verona. Venice is amazing; but one thing they don't mention is the smell in summer. It's from the canals. Every so often an alarm goes off which tells everybody there's a flood. The water goes over the sidewalks and everything smells worse for a while. Canals aren't as romantic as they look._  
_The last few days we've been inside museums mostly, because we had a series of sunny days, and I've got Renaissance art kind of swirling around in my head right now. I thought of you last night when I went to Harry's Bar, the place Hemingway and Truman Capote and all them guys used to hang out in. It's actually a pretty ordinary bar that tourists go to because of the famous writers who got drunk there; but that's enough of a draw for me. Maybe I sat in the same chair where Capote once sat and thought about how great he was, or where Hemingway...sat and thought about how great he was. I'm sure there are modest writers, but maybe they don't end up becoming famous._  
_How are Sue and Charlie doing? Any word on the day shift job Sue was trying out for? I hope she gets it, so she and Charlie can be on the same schedule finally._  
_Say hello to your dad if you think that would be okay, and to your brother and Leah, if you think they wouldn't mind hearing from me. All my best to Paul._  
_Your friend, Whoever_

Verona was a quiet city generally, although there was some kind of festival going on when we arrived, and there was music and juggling and people in costumes everywhere. It was, of course, the setting for Romeo and Juliet, and I had to admit there seemed to be something in the air. Kate struck up a conversation with a handsome man from Pisa within minutes of our arrival, and soon after that disappeared for twelve hours. Tanya and Irina, not to be outdone, took up a position near a street band, smiling and swaying to the music until gentlemen struck up a conversation. They, too, wandered off with their new acquaintances and were not seen until late the next day.

The city had two thousand year old Roman ruins, which I found fascinating; but it was even more intriguing to discover that performances were still held in the Roman amphitheatre. I saw La Traviata for the first time there; the acoustics were still excellent.

We skipped the many cheesy Romeo and Juliet-related tourist traps, including the site where young lovers left notes for Juliet, requesting her help - what help could my love life possibly need at this point? - but Edward and I did attend an Italian language performance of Romeo and Juliet. "It seems kind of pointless," I remarked as we waited for the curtain to rise. "Shakespeare wasn't great because of his stories - most of them were stolen anyway. It was because of his beautiful words. Translating his plays takes away the best part."

"I don't disagree," he said. "We'll have to see it in English together some time. But I wanted to come here with you partly out of nostalgia. We studied the play together our senior year, if you recall."

I did recall. And even in Italian, the play, our memories, and whatever was in the air of Verona made us rush back to our hotel the second the curtain fell. I mischievously quoted the play to Edward later, whispering in Italian at the appropriate moment, "O happy dagger! This is thy sheath!" He laughed a little breathlessly, preoccupied but still amused - maybe by my highly unusual foray into mildly naughty talk, or maybe by the fact that I scrunched up my face in embarrassment the moment I'd spoken. "_O colpa dolcemente sollecitato_," he whispered back. I didn't bother to ask for a translation.

We delayed our arrival in Florence, first taking the train to cities on the way, to Ferrera and Bologna. We returned north to hunt, then continued on our route. We were taking things slowly now, leisurely enjoying all the beautiful sights, absorbing the history, observing the unfamiliar way of life.

In Ferrara, Alice found a privately owned museum dedicated to the history of prostitution on the Italian peninsula, and a temple of modern day Venus-worshippers set up in a storefront, which offered weekly services and periodic lectures on the many benefits of Venus worship. A neatly printed sign read, in three languages, 'Visitors please be advised that services the first Saturday of each month are clothing optional.' I immediately sent an email to Rachel, describing both locations.

Bologna was a university town, and had a youthful population. This meant, among other things, more political graffiti on the walls, but also a livelier bar scene. Edward and I found a place with a really good reggae band, and Tanya, Irina, and Kate all found companionship easily, on the night we arrived. Some of the clubs had an odd smell, which Esme identified for me as hashish. It was experiencing a local revival, I was told.

Alice, by whatever uncanny means allowed her to ferret out these things, found a shop called _Sotto Il Ginocchio_, dedicated exclusively to toe rings and ankle bracelets. I wasn't sure how they managed to make a living with such a narrow range of merchandise, but the shop seemed to be prosperous. I was going to just look around and leave, but Edward looked at the ankle bracelets, then glanced down unobtrusively at my shoe, then stared blankly out the window, and my number-two gift clicked in and told me he found the idea of me wearing an anklet unaccountably stimulating. Probably something relating back to the days when a glimpse of ankle was a big deal. I bought three.

After one more hunting trip, we returned south and continued on to Florence. We were into Tuscany now; the landscape changed, as did the look of the towns. It was softer, a little more rustic, the colours gentle and muted. We took our time here, went for long walks, enjoyed the sight of people going about their daily routines in the middle of a medieval city. I saw Titian's Venus, Michelangelo's David, and the painting I couldn't help but think of as Venus on the Half Shell. I continued to focus on learning Spanish, but did take in a few essential phrases in Italian: 'I don't speak Italian,' obviously; 'Thank you,' 'How much?' and the always essential 'No, I'm not interested,' and 'Please stop that.' Italian men could be persistent, although many of the guys here seemed to prefer Esme.

A week into our stay in Florence, we finally had a continuously cloudy day, and we took a day trip. Eleazar wanted to view some ruins in some town to the south-west, and we visited small galleries and just took in the pretty Tuscan countryside. As we walked through the main street of one of the larger towns, I caught a distinctive and startling scent. The others seemed to pick it up as well. A vampire was nearby.

"Where?" I whispered, looking around. There were people sitting at outdoor cafés, walking, riding bicycles, but they were ordinary humans. I let my eyes follow the scent. There was a small but elegant tour bus parked at the end of a narrow avenue, with a cluster of people gathered around it. They were listening to a young woman who seemed to be the tour guide, a tall, gorgeous woman in cutting-edge Italian fashion that was distinctive but stopped short of being bizarre. She wore a wide brimmed hat and sunglasses, and was talking animatedly to the enthralled group of tourists. The scent came from her. "Not a tour group. They didn't come here with her. She's trying to get them to take the bus." I said.

Carlisle looked at me sharply. "Are you sure? How do you know?"

"Um...elementary?"

He nodded, watching the group intently. The woman seemed distracted by our presence, but continued her oration."Who is she?" Carlisle asked Edward quietly.

"She's with the Volturi." I froze. My memories of the Volturi were blurry, but in my mind they were associated with terror. The woman opened the door to her van, and the tourists climbed inside. "Should we leave?"

Before Carlisle could answer, the woman - the female - came toward us. "Italiano? Inglese? Un altro?" she asked pleasantly.

"English, by preference," Carlisle said.

"_Va bene_. Thirteen travelling together? That is unlucky." She smiled, but I wondered if that _unlucky_ was meant as a veiled threat.

Tanya smiled politely. "I hope not."

"I won't ask if you want to join my tour." She laughed, removing her sunglasses to reveal crimson eyes. "So many of you! Is this an invasion?" She was still smiling, but her eyes moved from face to face searchingly.

"Nothing of the kind," Carlisle said. "We are merely friends, travelling together."

"Mm hm. I'm called Heidi. May I ask who you are?"

"I'm Carlisle; this is my family." He introduced us all. "And this is Tanya and her family: Irina, Katrina, Carmen, and Eleazar."

"I see. I belong to a very large family myself, who reside nearby. Perhaps you've heard of them."

Tanya smiled wryly. "I believe we have."

Heidi turned to look at Eleazar. "I've heard your name before. You were with them also, before my time."

Eleazar inclined his head. "I was." He offered no more information.

"Well. I must get back to my clients. They will be growing impatient to see the local sights." She raised a hand in farewell, Carlisle and Tanya nodded back, and she strode off, gracefully balanced on her smart red three inch heels.

"Fishing lure," I said faintly. Elementary.

"Precisely," Edward said. The others looked at him. "Heidi is sent out to bring humans back to Volterra. She approaches tourists, posing as a private tour guide with access to exclusive, lesser known sites. They won't have left any record of signing on for her tours. They just go off sightseeing one day, and never come back."

"Why?" I asked.

Eleazar answered me. "The Volturi do not go out to hunt. They are royalty, so to speak. Their prey is brought to them."

Meeting Heidi put a damper on the day's excursion. We started back toward Florence, but an hour after meeting with Heidi, we were approached once again. Heidi and a second vampire, one who looked like a boy of twelve or thirteen, appeared in front of us as we walked down a quiet street toward the train station. Both wore sunglasses.

The boy spoke. "Our masters would like to see you. They are anxious to greet their old friends, Carlisle and Eleazar; and to meet the newest member of Carlisle's coven."

"Very well," Carlisle said evenly.

"Soon," the boy said. They both turned and darted off between the ancient brick buildings.


	21. Meeting

We took the train back to Florence in silence, returned on foot to our hotel. "Fix your face, sweetie," Alice told me, chucking me under the chin. I realized the others were wearing pleased expressions as they entered the hotel lobby, appropriate for people on vacation who had spent the day exploring Tuscany. I tried to follow their example. Rosalie chuckled at the results. "You never did have a good poker face," she told me. "You'll have to work on that. For now, just smile a little, and don't make eye contact." I turned my lips up slightly, and she nodded.

We went to one of the suites, Alice and Jasper's, locked the door, and stood together in the living area. Carlisle said, "Our two families don't have to arrive at the same decision, or take the same action; but I think it would be best to discuss it together."

"I agree," Tanya said. "First of all, I don't suppose there's any question of not going?"

"I shouldn't think so," Eleazar answered. "If the Volturi want to see us, they will see us, sooner or later. There's no point antagonizing them by refusing their invitation."

"It's reasonable that they would want to see Bella, and confirm that we've followed through," Jasper said.

"I could go by myself," I suggested. I wasn't crazy about the idea, but it seemed a little less frightening than seeing Edward and my whole family facing the Volturi.

Edward shook his head. "There's no call for that!"

"Alternately," Carlisle said, "three of us could go. Only Eleazar, Bella, and myself were requested by name. The rest could stay behind."

"You shouldn't go in there without support," Carmen objected. "They're so unpredictable."

"All the more reason to limit the number who meet with them," Eleazar argued, a protective hand on Carmen's shoulder.

There was a silence. "Discussion, anyone?" Carlisle asked.

"I think it's a terrible idea," Rosalie said decidedly. "Are we a family, or aren't we? Since when do we split up when there's trouble? We should be protecting each other, not hedging our bets that fewer of us will be at risk. I think we should go in there together, all of us."

"I agree with Rosalie," Edward said.

"_There's_ a first," she said drily, and he snorted.

"Tanya?" Carlisle turned to her.

"Just what is the risk?" she asked. "We were asked to come to them, and show them Bella has been changed. They'll see she has been. We haven't broken any laws. What is it you're concerned about?"

"We haven't really discussed this with you before," Carlisle told her, "but when we encountered the Volturi earlier, after our battle with the newborns, Edward picked up certain things in Aro's thoughts."

"Aro is acquisitive," Edward said. "He collects gifted individuals; and he was quite intrigued at some of our gifts, particularly Alice's and Bella's."

"So your fear is that he will try to persuade them to join the Volturi?" Irina asked.

"Yes. Or perhaps do more than persuade."

Tanya nodded. "In that case, I agree that we should all go together." She smiled at me and reached over to pat Alice's spiky head. "My little sisters won't face their _persuasion_ alone! Agreed?"

Irina and Kate agreed, and Carmen looked relieved. I think she was worried the Volturi would try to get Eleazar back as well.

"In that case, is there anything we need to consider in advance of our visit?" Carlisle asked.

"I don't necessarily expect any trouble," Jasper said, "but we should be prepared for every contingency. Edward thinks Aro might be...assertive in his efforts to obtain new members of the Guard."

"I could hear the plans in his mind," Edward said.

"But Alice did not see any of us joining. Possibly the plans were mostly speculation."

"Possibly," Edward said, looking far from convinced.

"You hear Aro's thoughts," Jasper told Edward. "I have no doubt that his thoughts often centre on ways to increase his influence. But I feel what he feels. He takes great pride in his position as impartial guardian of the law."

"I believe Jasper is right," Eleazar said. "Aro's mind may well be filled with thoughts of new additions to his Guard, but he would be reluctant to act in an openly unlawful way."

"You may be right," Edward said, with a little more conviction. "I still think great caution is in order."

We spent some time going over directions our meeting with the Volturi might take. We proposed things Aro might say to encourage one or more of us to stay, and what we could say to politely counter his offers.

My eyelids flickered slightly. Ideas came into my head, but they were unclear. "What he might do is try to use one member of the family to influence another. If he threatened Jasper, Alice would stay. If he threatened Edward..."

"Yes, I see," Jasper said thoughtfully. "Again, not that I expect it, but if it comes down to a direct threat..."

"In that case," Eleazar said, "we would have no chance. Nobody would."

I tried to fix on the dreamlike ideas going through my mind. "The Guard. How many are there?"

"Eight in my day," Eleazar said. "But more have been added since."

"I saw ten in their thoughts," Edward said. "Not including Heidi, who is seen as a sort of independent contractor; and the wives and their bodyguards, who don't attend audiences. Why do you ask?"

"How many have mental type weapons, like that Jane, and how many have physical weapons?"

"Felix and Santiago are their chief bodyguards, in terms of physical defence," Eleazar said. "Felix is an incredible fighter - strong, quick, and adept. He would be the primary threat in that category. Santiago depends on strength more than skill, but he is still formidable."

"What about the others?"

Eleazar seemed to wonder about my questions, but answered without argument. "I am not certain about Afton. He can make himself difficult to see, can even hide a person standing behind him; but I'm not sure whether his gift is mental or physical."

"Afton is the tall male with long, light brown hair?" Edward asked.

"Yes."

"I saw him in Aro's thoughts. It was only a glimpse, but I believe his gift works on the mind."

"Good," I said. "And the others?"

"The rest of the guard all have gifts that act on the mind," Eleazar said.

"Can you tell me what their gifts are?"

He described them briefly, the talents that numbed all the senses or that caused debilitating pain; the ability to divert and confuse an assailant; to form loyalties or dissolve alliances; to give an artificial feeling of contentment and acceptance; along with Aro's mind reading and Marcus' ability to see the relationships between individuals and groups. All useful to rulers who needed to control both their subjects and their own servants.

"Why are you asking this, Bella?" Tanya asked.

"Because it changes the odds. We have Felix and Santiago who are strong fighters, but how are the rest of the guard at fighting?"

Eleazar shrugged. "I have no idea. Completely inexperienced, I would imagine. If a conflict began, their gifts would protect them, protect the Volturi. Jane's and Alec's in particular. They never have to fight, not physically."

I grinned. "They would have to if _I_ was there."

There was a momentary silence, then Emmett burst out laughing. "Bella has a point," he said. "Her shield would even the odds, all right!"

Tanya nodded. "It would be as if their usual weapons did not exist."

"So," Jasper said thoughtfully, "we would be a team of thirteen against ten, two of whom are dangerous fighters, but the rest probably unfamiliar with battle."

"That would, perhaps, be encouraging if we intended to engage the Volturi in combat," Carlisle said. "I hope you're not suggesting that we attempt a surprise attack on the Guard?"

"No, not at all. I'm assuming that our goal is to avoid confrontation. But being in a position of strength can help us to do that, especially if the Volturi are aware of our strength. Sometimes," Jasper said, "the best defence is a good offence."

* * *

We took the train as far as it went, and walked the rest of the way into Volterra. None of us spoke on the way; we'd discussed the upcoming meeting in every detail, and our plans were clear. Besides, I think we all appreciated the quiet time together before we faced the Volturi. We reached the clock tower in the centre of town just as the sun started to come out from behind the clouds and shine brightly, and we kept to the shadows until we were indoors. It seemed a little strange that the residence of the Volturi was regarded as just another old stone building, divided up and rented out as offices and workplaces. The scent trail of the Volturi and guard, and of the vampires who arrived for an audience with them, was like a theatre marquee; but I realized that to humans, the place would not stand out in any way.

From the stone archway, we followed the corridor to a reception area, attended by a young woman. She was human, and greeted us pleasantly in Italian.

"She's actually their employee," Edward told us, his voice disapproving, too low for the receptionist to hear. "She knows who she works for."

"This is something new," Eleazar said, frowning at the girl.

Carlisle glanced at Jasper, who approached the desk. He gave the woman a warm smile. "Good day, little lady. _Parli Inglese_?"

"Oh, _si._ Yes," she replied, flustered but smiling. I thought Jasper might be using a little emotional control along with his pretty smile. "I speak English. What can I do for you?"

Jasper glanced significantly downward, indicating the lower levels of the building. "We were asked to come in."

"Of course. The name?"

Carlisle said, "Tell them we are here to present Isabella to them."

She stood. "Let me show you to the room."

I held tightly to Edward's hand as we followed her. We waited together at the chamber door as the receptionist went inside to announce us. I could hear Aro's unctuous voice from inside: "Thank you, my dear. Send them in." She emerged and nodded to us.

As we entered the chamber, everyone shifted their positions slightly, so that I was in the centre, surrounded by the others. I understood the reason: I had to be protected. If worse came to worst, my shield would be their only hope of withstanding the Guard. I spread my shield out, covering everyone, and only then took the time to look around. The chamber was arranged like a throne room, with three high backed chairs on an elevated platform, one for each of the Volturi. It was at once dungeon-like and palatial; dank and cheerless, but with marble floors, ornate hanging lanterns, wall tapestries, and elaborately carved furnishings. I thought it could stand a little redecorating by the proprietors of the Lakeview Bed & Breakfast; I stifled a laugh at the thought of the Volturi's chamber decked out with kitschy trinkets, the three royal presences seated on wicker chairs with calico seat covers. It was silly, but I immediately felt calmer.

I recognized the three Volturi from my indistinct human memories of the night we'd fought the newborns. I also remembered little Jane, and the enormous male bodyguard who had been there in Forks, the one they called Felix. There were others as well, all dressed in shades of grey, most of them arrayed on either side of the thrones. One female stood at Aro's shoulder as if protecting him.

I felt a little of the fear I'd experienced when I'd seen the Volturi as a human. I also felt the strangest sensation, as if in a part of my body I couldn't identify. I finally realized that it was my shield itself that was sensing something stirring against it, trying to get through. I couldn't put into words what I was feeling, but I knew someone was trying to see through my shield, to discover something. He or she was not succeeding; the shield held fast.

"Carlisle, my old friend!" Aro said, rising from his seat. "We last spoke on the site of a battle. It is good to see you under less distressing circumstances." His eyes slid to Jasper, who stood at Carlisle's left, looking utterly relaxed, seeming to ignore the meeting altogether, his only reaction a subtle attitude of deference whenever Carlisle spoke. Combined with his countless scars, his presence next to Carlisle sent out an unmistakable message: _I've fought thousands. They all died, and I survived. And I'm on _his_ side_.

"Aro." Carlisle greeted him with a faint smile. "Greetings Marcus, Caius." The other two Volturi inclined their heads, but said nothing. Apparently Aro did most of the talking for the three of them.

"And Eleazar! A great deal of time has passed since you were with us. I see you have found a coven of your own."

Eleazar bowed slightly. "Yes, I found Tanya and her sisters more than a century after Carmen and I left."

"Yet another coven which has taken on unconventional hunting practices, I observe." Aro studied the cousins carefully.

"Yes. Carmen and I prefer it."

Aro chuckled and shook his head, like someone amused by a friend's inexplicable fondness for gas station tacos. "Tanya, you and your coven are most welcome."

Tanya inclined her head politely.

"But before we continue, let us welcome our newcomer! Isabella, how different you look now than at our first meeting!" Aro smiled, that outwardly sugary smile that made my skin crawl, and held his hands out to me as though inviting everyone to look. "Immortality becomes you very well. Congratulations on your successful metamorphosis."

"Thank you." I felt calm and composed, but I was sure that was Jasper's doing. I knew there was potential danger. I felt new sensations, new forces trying to penetrate my shield. I found I could identify them - not only their source, but their intent. I could sort of _taste_ them with my shield. A force attempting to discover more about us. Another trying to come between each family member, to weaken the bond between us. And another, subtler energy, one that was more dangerous because it seemed friendly and pleasant; it felt safe to allow it past my shield, although somehow I knew better. They were Marcus' gift, and Chelsea's, and Corin's, trying to reach us, and failing. I was momentarily taken up with my ability to taste these gifts as they attempted to reach us. _A smooth, balanced little gift with a pleasant bouquet_, I thought in a pompous wine taster's voice, _ ideal for bouncing harmlessly off my implacable shield_.

"Of course, I cannot help but wonder whether your rather impressive gift has changed as well. Would you permit me?" Aro moved closer, holding out his hand. His bodyguard moved with him.

I braced myself, let go of Edward's hand, and went forward to meet him. I kept my shield firmly over my entire family as I placed my hand in Aro's.

As before, he bent his head thoughtfully for a long moment, then released me. "Just as before. I see nothing whatsoever." He smiled at me again. "Excellent. You are, I am sure, a welcome addition to an already talented family." I returned to my place beside Edward. "May I ask who effected the transformation?"

"I did," Edward said.

"Naturally enough. And how was her disappearance explained?" He looked a little more stern as he asked, and Caius leaned forward attentively.

"It was managed for us, purely by chance," Edward explained. He described our disastrous flight from Anchorage, how we had escaped, and the subsequent funeral for us both. Sorrow for my parents' grief and shock emerged from the part of my mind where it remained, set aside but ever fresh, and I restrained it once again.

"What an unlikely turn of events! And yes, that does seem to have solved the problem satisfactorily." Aro looked around at us all, smiling affably. "Well, well. This is a reunion for several of us, after a lengthy period without any contact. Especially for you and your two sisters, Tanya." He looked at her. "Our last encounter was when we were forced to intervene in that unfortunate episode..." He trailed off, as Tanya, Irina, and Kate stood stiffly, immobile. "But there is no need to rake up the past. You three were found innocent, and there is no stain on your record, none whatsoever."

"We are very much obliged to you," Tanya said, her voice flat.

My eyelids fluttered slightly as I looked around at the Volturi and their Guard. I could feel my second gift functioning, more clearly than I ever had before. Eleazar had said it might operate best under stress, and this situation certainly involved stress. I was reminded of those teletype machines I'd seen in old movies. The machine would start humming and whirring, and a few seconds later a long stream of printed information would start to emerge from the machine's slot. Right now, I felt like my mind had started humming and whirring, and I was standing by for a very extensive printout. I kept my shield firmly fixed in place, but it didn't feel as if one gift interfered with the functioning of the other.

Aro was reminiscing with Tanya about events of the past centuries, making his interrogation seem very much like pleasant conversation. As he spoke, he walked casually over to Marcus, reached out and took his hand. Aro paused a moment, then turned to look sharply at Marcus, who shook his head. Aro glanced around at us as though suspicious, but he kept chatting without so much as a break or a change in his tone of voice. I immediately understood what had happened: Marcus' gift was to see the relationships between people. Aro had wanted to read what Marcus was picking up about the members of our family and their affinity to each other, but Marcus had come up blank. My shield blocked him from obtaining any information.

Aro finished with the three sisters and turned to Eleazar. "It is also some time before our former brother has been here with us. Eleazar, I would love to know more about the direction your life has taken since you left our Guard. Would you permit me?" He held out his hand, and Eleazar stepped forward to comply.

My internal teletype machine had finished spitting out its message, and it left me uncertain. According to our joint agreement, I was to remove my shield from individuals if Aro wished to read their thoughts, since refusing might be seen as an act of rebellion. My instincts told me to keep my shield in place. I felt I was in no position to make unilateral decisions, but I was also sure that my course was advisable. In the seconds it took for Aro to extend his hand and Eleazar to approach, I decided to request what backup I could. I firmly fixed my mind on the decision to keep us all shielded, and reached out to touch Alice. She looked at me, and I raised my eyebrows questioningly, hoping she'd understand.

Alice's eyes stared into space momentarily. Edward turned to look at her, taking in her vision of the consequences of my action, then at me. Alice looked at me and nodded minutely; Edward did the same. As Eleazar's hand touched Aro's, I kept my shield where it was.

Aro took Eleazar's hand in his, paused, and bowed his head as he had done with me earlier. He looked up at Eleazar, then directly at me.

"I'm afraid we're discovering that my gift is, so to speak, contagious," I told him. I saw Carlisle half turn toward me in surprise, and Edward place a hand on his shoulder. Carlisle looked at Edward, who nodded almost imperceptibly. I hoped everything had been made reasonably clear without attracting the Volturi's attention.

"How fascinating! I have never heard of a gift being passed along to others. Have you, Eleazar?"

Eleazar was quick on the uptake. "Never, Aro. But you recall that Bella's gift was surprisingly well established during her human life. It could be expected to develop extensively, perhaps unpredictably, after her transformation."

"Yes," Aro said thoughtfully. He studied me closely a moment and, acting on some idea that was still at the instinctive level, I gave him a big smile. His eyes widened in surprise, and he looked away without comment. "Well, Eleazar, I hope you will tell me the events of your recent life in the conventional way."

Eleazar began summarizing all that had happened to him since leaving Volterra with Carmen, many years before. I felt a faint prickling along the edges of my shield, and easily identified its source. Jane was testing her gift, trying to find out if it was true that we were all protected against her now. I turned toward her; she didn't look happy. I had a cloudy, human memory of Edward, writhing on the ground in agony, as Jane smiled her sweet little smile. _It's not going to come down to a fight_, I thought. _But if it does, you're mine, little girl_. For just a second, I could picture myself attacking her, sinking my teeth into her neck and tearing her head off. It felt very satisfying. Jasper raised an eyebrow at me, and I focused my attention.

"Have you never thought of returning?" Aro was asking Eleazar. "We did such excellent work together."

"We did, certainly," Eleazar said politely, "but I simply found that it was not my calling."

"I understand. We must all follow our destiny." Aro smiled affectionately at Eleazar. "But now that you are here again, along with our old friend Carlisle and all your associates, I hope you will accept our hospitality, at least for a short period. Who knows when we will meet again?"

I felt that sensation again, of something searching for entry, trying to get past my shield. Chelsea and Corin.

Carlisle replied cautiously, "It is...awkward for us, Aro, to be here for any length of time. Given our different ways of hunting, among other things."

"Yes, yes. Our ways of life are very different. But there are always points of contact. I used to quite enjoy our discussions, my old friend, on such a variety of topics. We all took pride in having forwarded your education - although I understand you are largely self-taught since then."

"I have also attended university on several occasions," Carlisle told him. "We all have - except Bella, who hasn't yet had the opportunity."

"Most impressive! And you are able to study, to learn, in a building filled with humans? You continue to astonish me, Carlisle. You and your entire coven - and yours as well, Tanya."

The teletype machine had completed its work; everything was clear to me. I saw what Aro had planned. It wasn't the huge and imposing Felix or Santiago who were a real threat to us, or even sadistic little Jane. Aro didn't have to use force, or threats. He just had to convince us to stay a few days, and let Chelsea and Corin do their work, unnoticed. We would decide on our own to stay, voluntarily, even happily. That is, we would if it weren't for my shield. We would feel a loyalty to the Volturi, a strong attachment to them; we would _long_ to serve them. And being here with them would bring us happiness - a sickly, unnatural kind of happiness, but a numbing and addictive kind. I let the remaining information seep in from my not-quite-subconscious. I understood exactly what kept the Guard together.

As Aro began to press us to stay with him for a time, I made another unilateral decision. I waited until Alice had processed the results, and she and Edward had given me a slight nod. Edward again touched Carlisle's shoulder, and a moment of silent communication passed between them. Then Carlisle caught Tanya's eye, unable to relate anything but letting her know that something was about to go down.

I reached out with my shield, carefully turning it out, mirror style, and wrapped it around Chelsea, stifling her gift and preventing her from having any effect, even on the Volturi and the Guard. Cautiously, keeping my shield in place over both families, I did the same to Corin. It felt as if I were reaching out and wrapping a hand around each of their heads, holding their gifts inside.

For a few seconds, nothing happened. Aro went on speaking in his saccharine voice, encouraging us to extend our visit. Suddenly Marcus raised his head, staring at the back of the chamber for a moment, his eyes wide. It was the first time I'd ever seen him look anything but bored. He inhaled sharply, and Aro turned toward him. Marcus met Aro's eyes, with an expression I couldn't define: anger, misery, guilt, sorrow, horror, all mixed together. It was a shocking contrast to his usual blank indifference. Aro paused in his speech, and Marcus looked away and sat stiffly, staring at the floor, as if trying to work something out in his own mind.

Aro quickly scanned the Guard members. I saw no obvious reaction, but Aro studied them with a worried expression. I released Chelsea and Corin from my grip, seeing my point was made.

Aro returned to what he'd been saying, although he seemed a little distracted. "You will all find it a wonderful opportunity to learn, to expand your experience. With no obligation, of course, to remain longer than you wish." He looked at me searchingly. "My dear Isabella, wouldn't you enjoy the chance to discover more about our history, the work we have done to maintain the peace in our world, the world you are now part of?"

"I'm sure it would be very interesting," I said, "and I admire the work you do to keep us safe. I requires such perfect...balance." I could see it all: a perfect but precarious balance, one person's gift equalling another's; animosity between Guard members on one side balanced by the bond between mates or siblings on the other. It was what kept them from destroying each other.

"Balance?" he repeated, tilting his head inquisitively.

"Yes. You've achieved exactly the right equation here, the right people in your Guard, so that it functions perfectly. So perfect, that if you add or subtract anything, it would disrupt the harmony you've established."

Both Aro and Caius were watching me closely now. "Do you think so?" Aro asked.

"I feel sure of it." I looked pointedly at Alice. "And who would risk perfect harmony for the sake of a change that could end well, or just as easily end in disaster?" I looked at Alice again; she nodded sagely. It was tedious, talking in vaguely sinister metaphors and unspoken threats, but that seemed to be the way things got done around here. The Borgias must have got sick of it after a while. I stopped and turned to Carlisle. "Sorry if I'm speaking out of turn."

"Not at all, Bella." Carlisle looked at Aro. "You're quite right; the Volturi would not risk their position, so essential to all of us, for an uncertain benefit."

Tanya spoke. "That is why the Volturi remain stable and strong," she said, gesturing at the three thrones, "long after the Romanian empire, the _Domnitori Strigoi_, have fallen. _They_ were ambitious, greedy." She waved a dismissive hand. "And they're gone now." She was pretty good at the vaguely sinister thing. "The Volturi would never make the same mistake."

"No," Alice agreed. "I can see continued stability. No future disasters for the Volturi." She smiled sweetly. "As long as they remain as they are and we, also, continue peacefully," she added, as if as a casual afterthought. "Otherwise, the future takes a different direction. There will be imbalance, and the Romanians...but I'm sure that will never happen."

Usually this kind of situation would bring literary references to mind, fictional characters who had perished due to their overweening ambition; but at the moment, all I could come up with was Yertle the Turtle.

"But, to return to the question at hand," Carlisle said, "we are deeply honoured by your invitation, but must regretfully decline it."

Edward, who seemed to have kept himself apprised, went on. "What we want most is to live as we have done. We respect the work you do here, but it is a hard thing to have the life you've chosen disrupted, close relationships divided, even in a good cause. Just as it would be terrible if your far more venerable coven were to somehow lose its close bonds of loyalty, its members turned against one another and its strength reduced." It was a more direct statement than we'd been dealing with. He paused to let it sink in. "Our family is of no consequence by comparison, of course, but I am sure you understand that it would be of no real benefit, to us or to you, to bring any of us here unwillingly. It could only result in...disharmony."

There was a silence. Caius rose from his seat and stood beside Aro, looking displeased. "I, for one, have no interest in any changes to our Guard. It has already expanded beyond manageable size, in my opinion." Aro didn't respond, but I could see he was weighing things in his mind.

Carlisle spoke again. "We are admirers and supporters of all the work you do to keep our world peaceful and hidden. As long as we continue to live together, you will have no more loyal subjects than our two families."

"And now," Tanya said, "perhaps you will allow us to take our leave."

Before Aro or Caius could speak, Marcus said dully, "Yes, you may go."

Aro looked back at him uneasily, then turned to smile at us once more. "Leave with our very best wishes; and be assured, you will always be under our protection. Your lives will not be, er, disrupted by us, or by any means we are able to prevent."

"Thank you," Carlisle said gravely, inclining his head. Tanya did likewise; then we turned and left the chamber in silence.


	22. Home Free

It was dark when we reached the main floor and walked back through the archway under the clock tower. We didn't speak at first, just kept walking in the direction of the nearest train station. I didn't withdraw my shield, keeping it circled protectively around everyone until we were miles from Volterra. Jasper noticed my vigilant attitude after a while.

"Are you still shielding us?" he asked me.

"Um...yeah, I am."

"You can stop now, love," Edward said. "No one followed us."

I nodded and let my shield fall back into place, although I glanced back nervously at the town behind us. "They were trying to get through."

"Who was?" Tanya asked. "Get through what?"

I gestured back toward Volterra. "Several of them. They were trying to get past my shield, to use their gifts on us. One of them, I think he's called Demetri, kept trying to see us."

Edward nodded. "Demetri is a tracker. He doesn't track by scent, but by following what you might call the individual's psychic scent. He can track their minds. He won't be able to find us, however. Thanks to Bella's shield, he couldn't take an initial reading."

"Good to know," Emmett said.

"Mostly, though, it was Chelsea and Corin," I said. "Aro wanted to use their gifts to win us over, convince some of us we wanted to stay."

Everyone seemed to think this over. "Would they have succeeded?" Eleazar asked. We all looked at Alice.

"You know I can't see what _might_ _have_ happened. I saw us leaving unharmed as the most likely outcome by far; but there were other scenarios that were also possible, just barely. When Bella started talking to Aro about balance and future harmony, our leaving became almost 100% certain, and our safety extended farther into the future, as far as I was able to see. I think she may have convinced him to leave us alone for good."

"I hope that's true," Carmen said. "A short term truce is far from ideal."

"Nice touch, bringing up the Romanians," Emmett said to Tanya.

She shrugged. "I thought it would drive the point home. Aro is all too aware that Stefan and Vladimir are still alive, and ready to take advantage of any lack of unity among the Volturi."

"What if they did take over again?" I asked. "Would we like the Romanians in charge any better than the Volturi?"

Everyone looked at the three sisters. "You're the only ones who've lived during their reign," Carlisle said. "What do you think?"

Kate said thoughtfully, "There are pros and cons. The Romanians were more laissez-faire in general, but when they did want something, they could be fairly autocratic. The Volturi believe in the rule of law, or want to appear to believe in it. They won't take action unless there is at least some legal basis for it. Even though we have reason to hate them..." She looked at her sisters.

"Yes," Irina said. "It was the Volturi who took our mother from us. It's hard to see such things objectively, but I understand why their action must have seemed necessary. These infants were a danger to us all, and they couldn't be taught." She sighed.

"The Romanians were probably easier to deal with, over all," Tanya concluded. "But they were for an earlier time. They felt very little responsibility to keep us hidden from humans, and only intervened in the most openly reckless behaviour. Otherwise, they just sat around being royalty. In those days, it didn't much matter if people became aware of our existence. Today, things are more complicated. As much as there is to dislike about the Volturi, they take their responsibilities seriously. They keep our secrecy intact. Yes, they are probably preferable, especially if Aro is willing to limit his ambitions."

"It looks good so far," Alice said. "Thanks to Bella. It was her shield that made all the difference. And, of course, her Holmesian deduction."

"She no longer attracts danger," Rosalie said. "Now she deflects it!" She was joking, but I had a wonderful feeling that it was true.

There was no train for some time, and we determined to walk back to Florence, running when we could do so discreetly. "Are we continuing with our trip, the way we'd planned?" Rosalie asked.

We looked at each other. "I'm not sure," Esme said. "Are we still in the mood for it?"

"We don't have to decide right away, I suppose," Kate said.

We left that decision hanging while we talked over the events of the day, and compared notes. I described what I'd worked out about the Volturi's system of checks and balances, how they remained together in relative harmony, and how Aro had hoped to obtain new members.

"Bella was right," Edward said. "Chelsea and Corin are more important to the Volturi than the Guard members with defensive gifts. Without the imposed sense of loyalty and attachment, and the artificial happiness Corin's gift provides, they would either disband or destroy each other." He grinned at me. "You gave him the fright of his life."

"How'd she do that?" Emmett asked.

I described how I'd blocked Chelsea and Corin, momentarily depriving the rest of the Guard of their influence. "Is that what happened to Marcus?" Eleazar exclaimed. "It was the most emotion I've ever seen him display, poor man."

"Aro had a faint glimpse of what would happen if he had to deal with the Guard, minus their mood stabilizers. The Volturi's entire rule may have been threatened. And, although he was skeptical of your claim that your shield was _contagious_," Edward laughed, "he wasn't absolutely positive. He was terrified that his Guard would 'catch' your gift from you, and become impervious to the gifts of the others, including his own."

"He was genuinely afraid," Jasper confirmed. "His attitude toward us changed drastically from that moment."

"You seem to have hit on exactly the right thing to say, to convince Aro we should be left alone," Carmen said to me. "How could you be so sure, when you barely knew the Volturi?"

"Elementary," I said. "I don't know. My 'insight' thing started going into overdrive once we were inside the chamber."

Eleazar nodded. "As I've said before, many gifts operate best when stress or danger is present."

"And Tanya and Carlisle knew exactly how to follow up," I pointed out.

"What I want to know," Jasper said, "is what you found so funny when we first went into the audience chamber. _I_ didn't see anything to laugh at."

"Oh, that?" I shrugged embarrassed. "I was just trying to keep myself calm, so I started, er, mentally redecorating the Volturi's chamber."

"Excuse me?" Carlisle looked at me.

"See, the room seemed purposely set up to be intimidating. All the priceless antiques, the grey robes, the trio of thrones, in this secret subterranean vault. So I imagined it done over in the style of this B&B Edward and I stayed at once." I described my image of the Volturi audience chamber decked out in country kitsch. "It made me feel a little less nervous."

First Emmett, then Alice, then all the rest started to laugh at my description. They laughed so hard and so long, we all moved away from the road to keep from attracting attention. "Oh, my goodness!" Esme said. "The Volturi's chamber covered in floral wallpaper!" They laughed harder.

"Instead of grey robes," Alice giggled, "they could all wear corduroy slacks and cardigans!"

"And topsiders!" Rosalie offered. "And replace their thrones with white wicker chairs!" My idea exactly.

"Or bentwood rockers," Kate suggested.

"Or three matching plaid recliners," Esme laughed.

"And right behind them," Irina giggled, "a needlepoint sign that says 'Home Sweet Home'."

We kept coming up with improvements on our revised Volturi chamber, and laughing more uproariously each time. When we finally subsided, we were in a much better mood. "I don't see why we shouldn't continue with our trip, just as we'd intended," Kate said as we continued our walk.

"Neither do I," Alice agreed.

None of us could find a reason any more. Our mood had lifted, and all we wanted was to forget about the Volturi and go on with our lives as before.

We did leave Italy that very day, however. A little distance couldn't hurt.

We passed through Monaco, where Alice used her vision to allow Jasper to win 800 Euros at the craps table, then moved on along the coast. I was used to trains by now, and we took them from town to town until we reached Barcelona. We toured Spain, and turned back to the north, reaching Paris in mid December. Alice had counted on spending some considerable time in Paris, so instead of a hotel we rented three apartments in the same block, and used that as our home base. From there, we explored France, Belgium, and Luxembourg.

* * *

_Hi Rachel,_  
_I hope you and Paul had a good Christmas. __I'm so happy you finally got a senior class to teach! I know you've been hoping for that. I liked hearing about the school library; you've done some amazing work getting that established. Would it be okay if I donated some books? Let me know what you think is needed.  
How is Paul doing at work?_

I found Paul's job as a contractor kind of boring, but I always asked about it, to be polite. I even picked up some information on interior renovations from Esme, so I would have something to ask about.

_Congratulations to Jacob for getting into community college. I'm sure he'll do great. It's nice of Leah to support both of them until he graduates; but I don't suppose she minds at all, from what you tell me. Leah sounds like a completely new person; she was never happy when I knew her. Sue must be glad; I know she was always sorry about how angry Leah was ever since that situation came up. Just wondering, has Leah grown her hair back?_

I'd always taken Leah's ultra-short hair, which she cut after she became a werewolf, as some kind of statement. In my mind, it was connected with Leah's anger at the world, and most particularly at the Cullens who had caused her to lose Sam, and changed her into the sole female pack member - apparently taking away her ability to reproduce in the process. She and Jacob falling in love seemed to have stopped the endless flow of rage they had both carried around. Both still phased into wolf form, and acted as joint guardians of LaPush and the surrounding area. Perpetual guardians, since neither of them would age as long as they continued to take on wolf form. I thought it was romantic, in a weird kind of way.

___We're still travelling. _In Italy we were called in to see the authorities over discrepancies in my ID. You know who I mean. It was scary, but everything checked out and we're all so relieved to have it over with.

I wasn't about to go into more detail on the Volturi. Why burden Rachel when there was no need? But I thought Paul and the others would want to know that no grey-cloaked strangers would be turning up looking for me.

_We got as far as Paris by Christmas, and had a nice family celebration here. Since then we've been exploring the area._

Christmas had been great. The relief of having the Volturi threat out of the way made us all more festive than usual. We'd trimmed a huge tree in one of the apartments on Christmas Eve, walked through the streets of Paris in the light snowfall, looking at the lights and decorations, then gone home and departed to our respective rooms. We all left our bedrooms late the next morning, and had a lovely day just hanging out. The Cullens had become aware of the shocking fact that neither I nor any of Tanya's family had ever seen Duck Soup, and they called up a version in English with French subtitles, so we could enjoy the subtle nuances of Groucho's comic delivery. Then Kate put on some swing music and we danced until midnight. It was as casual and fun as my first Christmas with the Cullens had been elaborate, but I loved both.

_I stopped in at all the shrines of literary Paris: Notre Dame Cathedral, where the Hunchback lived; the cafés where Scott and Zelda Fitzgerald and Hemingway hung out; the hotel where George Orwell became a socialist; the English bookshop they all went to; Gertrude Stein's house; the flat where Flaubert visited his mistress, according to a guy at the hotel; and this famous graveyard that's absolutely full of writers for some reason. It's the same graveyard where Jim Morrison is buried, and his grave is always covered with weird junk that fans leave on it. _

Irina had added a pink rose to the gravesite. I hadn't realized she was a Doors fan.

_I took a break from learning Spanish when we got to France, and started working on French. I've got the essential traveller's phrases down, and Alice has been teaching me French slang, most of which I'll never have any reason to use. _

Although I did learn nineteen different ways to refuse an attempted bar pickup, ranging from polite to comically obscene.

_Naturally there is a lot to see in Paris. We've been working our way through every major museum and art gallery and a lot of the minor ones. That includes some odd ones, like the robot museum. I'm attaching pictures. _

There was also a Museum of Vampires, which we contemplated and decided to skip, fearing a dangerous overdose of irony.

_Some of the family toured the Museum of Eroticism, but I passed on that one. I'm very private about that kind of stuff, and Esme said I should accept that about myself, which seems like good advice. But I heard all about it from Alice and Rosalie later. I'm adding a link, which I warn you is not work-friendly._

___I'm shipping you a copy of Finnegan's Wake with some lines of poetry and some swear words written on the flyleaf that the shop owner claimed were written by Alan Ginsberg. I'm pretty sure they weren't, but I got it for you anyway. I've never read any James Joyce, because everyone says he's so complicated and difficult to understand, but if you recommend F's Wake maybe I'll give it a try soon._

I replied to some of Rachel's earlier news about Forks and the Rez, and about Charlie and Sue, then concluded with_, Happy new year to you and your family. Your friend, B_

We took our time exploring Paris and the surrounding countryside. I saw La Boheme for the first time, and also heard zydeco music live for the first time, in a Left Bank nightclub on New Year's Eve. Alice took me shopping at some boutiques that opened by appointment only, which I would have found intimidating without Alice fully in charge. The clothes were very nice, though. Alice told me I was starting to develop a real style of my own, and it took me a second to realize she wasn't making a joke. I bought a suitcase full, plus an awful lot of expensive lingerie.

Tanya and I started gargoyle watching, a practice roughly parallel to bird watching, in which we spotted and categorized the various gargoyles found on older buildings throughout Paris. Some of them were crumbling, leading us to propose a new charity, the Adopt-A-Gargoyle Preservation Programme. In exchange for financing the repair of one gargoyle, patrons would be given the right to name him or her. Tanya's favourite was a hideous, horned figure she named Patsy.

Every so often we'd take a day to hunt, usually in one of the national parks in the Swiss Alps.

Carlisle had picked up a lot of obscure material from the medical history museum and a university library's archives, and was doing some preliminary research. The family members with medical training were able to discuss his work with him, and I found it fascinating to listen in. "This is so interesting - what I understand of it - it makes me want to study sciences," I blurted out one evening, "which I've never wanted to do before."

"There's no reason why you can't," Rosalie told me. "If I can earn a medical degree, _you_ certainly can."

I thought there was a little compliment hidden in there somewhere, so I gave her a smile. "I guess so. But there are all these other things I want to learn, too. I always wanted to study English literature in college."

"Why not start with that," Carlisle suggested, "and go on to a different field the next time you attend college?"

"That works." I sat smiling to myself over the countless possibilities.

We all left France with a great deal more luggage than when we'd started out, but Alice was satisfied that we were all adequately dressed as we crossed the Channel to London in late February. The Cullens owned property in London, it turned out, usually rented out to tourists by the week; and they'd phoned ahead to arrange for the building to be empty during the time we would be there.

_Hi Rachel,_  
_I'm in England, and this is a book lover's paradise! Everywhere you go, there are either places that were scenes from some work of fiction, or places important to writers. The site of the Drones Club; the walkway where Harriet Vane finally accepted Lord Peter's proposal; the pub where C. S. Lewis and J. R. R. Tolkein used to drink beer and bounce ideas off each other; Jane Austen's burial site; 221-B Baker Street; Shakespeare's birthplace - the list goes on and on and on. They even have a statue of Virginia Woolf in a little park, commemorating the fact that she came up with To The Lighthouse while walking in that park. The bookstores here are amazing too. I'm sending some more stuff for your school library. _  
_I saw Hamlet for the first time as a live performance, in the rebuilt Globe Theatre, which is kind of cool. They even have standing room for the groundlings, like in the original theatre. I hope they give them a hefty discount on those tickets. There's no shelter if it rains, and modern groundlings don't even get to throw produce if they don't like the play, like they did in Shakespeare's day. _  
_We've started talking about going back..._

Actually, thoughts of ending our travels began when we were still in Paris. We were at some club where they had a pianist playing fantastic boogie-woogie, and Edward had remarked that he missed his piano. And of course, a couple of us had started talking about what we'd study next time we went to college. Then, in London, Esme had begun pondering how she'd decorate our new house in Minnesota, once we got there; and Carmen had started talking about finding a place not too far away from us. Alice had finally come out with it, and said, "As much as I love travelling, it's nice to have a stable place to call home. I kind of miss that."

Several of us had agreed, and Tanya said, "Sounds like it's time to start turning back."

We all agreed; but that wasn't something we would accomplish overnight. We could, in theory, vanish without a trace and turn up elsewhere, with new identities, almost literally overnight, but there was no rush. We continued to take in the history and culture of London and points beyond, while Tanya's family found and purchased, through an agent, a house in the same vicinity as our new location; Carlisle finalized the purchase of our new home and Esme made whatever arrangements for the interior she could manage long distance. Bank accounts and investments were shifted around.

Most important of all, new identities had to be chosen and backed up with the appropriate paperwork and virtual history. Jasper handled much of that business for us, Carmen for the cousins. Tanya's family went with the same cover story that had worked for them in the past: cohabiting arty bohemian types. We Cullens, deciding to forego the foster children thing this time, had a complex new story that involved four couples distantly related to each other. Edward was now Esme's younger brother, for example. "New names, anybody?" Jasper called out from his computer one evening. "If you don't indicate a preference, you'll have to take what I assign you."

"Not letting _that_ happen again!" Rosalie told me. "I once spent four years as Charlene Baumgarner."

"Want to be a McCarty for a change?" Emmett asked her, putting an arm around her waist. She smiled up at him, and he said to Jasper, "Jazz, make us Rose and Ethan McCarty, please."

"Got it," he said, his fingers moving like lightning over the keyboard. "You're starting out at nineteen and Rosalie is eighteen, all right? Edward, Bella, do you have names in mind?"

"We're going to be Jane and Henry Masen," Edward replied. I'd been inspired by seeing Jane Austen landmarks everywhere in recent weeks. "Both eighteen, recently married."

"Okay. And Alice will be seventeen..."

"Starting college early," Alice said. "I'm a prodigy."

"Do you mind if I watch how you do this?" I asked Jasper. "Maybe I can help some time."

"Be my guest," he said, taking a few minutes to explain what he was doing and how. It was complicated, and probably very, very illegal, but it would guarantee us an airtight identity for the next few years.

As I watched, Jasper vandalized the virtual records of multiple government agencies over the next few days, then contacted a lawyer in Seattle. It was a phone conversation straight out of some bad organized crime movie. "Cullen," he said into the phone, without even a hello. There was a slightly alarmed response from a female voice on the other end, and seconds later a nervous sounding man came on the line.

"Mister Cullen!" I could hear him say. "What a pleasure to hear from you again!" I didn't think he was entirely sincere. I gave Jasper a suspicious look, and he grinned at me. "What can I do for you today?"

"Paperwork. The records are in the system. I just need birth certificates, passports, school records, the usual."

"Yes, sir. Same address, or will you come in for them?"

"New address." Jasper gave him an address in Minnesota. "Don't send them until I call again."

"Understood, sir. And the names?"

Jasper rattled off the names we had chosen for ourselves, along with the birth dates and social security numbers. "And some additional work for friends of mine," Jasper added, giving the new names of Tanya's family members. "No rush this time. You've got a month."

"Thank you very much, Mr. Cullen! Anything else I can do for you?"

"Not at this time. Again, wait for my call. Your payment will arrive shortly."

"Yes, sir."

Jasper hung up. I frowned at him. "Somebody needs a lesson in phone etiquette!"

He laughed. "It's necessary to come across that way. The man has access to far too much information. J. Jenks is only safe to the extent that he's severely intimidated."

"I suppose you established this _intimidation_ by dealing with him in person?"

"Initially, yes. We now have a secure, reliable source of personal paperwork, and Jenks wouldn't mention our secret under any circumstances."

"But just to be sure," Edward added, "we limit the amount of information he has. We do our own identity creation online now, and just leave Jenks to produce the physical documents. Even Jenks wouldn't be able to track us down. And if he did report us, he'd come across as unbalanced."

"Why?" I asked.

"He's been dealing with Jasper for decades, and his former law partner before that. Jasper's never aged in all that time."

"Normally, we hide that fact," Jasper said, "but in this case, it keeps Jenks frightened and quiet."

"Speaking of frightened," Carlisle said, "I'd like to take the opportunity to visit my friend Alistair while we're in London. Perhaps just with Esme, this time. The entire family at once would probably terrify him."

I looked at him curiously, and Edward explained, "Alistair is the most nervous vampire imaginable. He travels alone because he's unable to trust anyone else sufficiently. Carlisle is the only person he calls a friend, and they only meet once in ten years."

While exploring along the Cornish coast, we encountered some other friends of Carlisle's, a family of three vampires: Maggie, Siobhan, and Liam. He presented us, and we spoke a while. The three were impressed that Carlisle had found so many to follow his 'difficult' way of life, and the conversation dealt with our alternate approach to hunting for some time. Eventually, Carlisle mentioned that we had seen the Volturi while in Italy.

"They were interested in the additions to my family," Carlisle explained. "In fact, they were particularly intrigued by the gifts some of them possess. There was a certain...uncomfortable pressure on them to consider staying on."

"Is that so?" Liam said. "I've heard stories about their 'pressure.' How did you manage to leave?"

"By virtue of those very gifts. Bella possesses a shield against anything that acts on the mind; she kept us protected. And our family's various abilities allowed us to demonstrate that taking any of us into the Guard would not be to their advantage in the long run." He described our encounter.

The three looked at each other. "Some have suggested that the Volturi's ambition is making them less valuable than previously."

"I would not go that far," Carlisle said. "And I have reason to believe they may moderate themselves somewhat better in the future. In any case, you may feel free to relate our experiences to anyone you meet in your travels."

Siobhan grinned. "We'll make a point of it. And I'll make a point of fervently hoping they may be as moderate as you suggest."

Carlisle laughed with her. "Yes, do that by all means."

We chatted with them a while, and they went their way.

"Why is it funny," I asked, "that Siobhan will hope the Volturi behave themselves?"

Carlisle smiled. "It's a longstanding debate between us. I believe Siobhan has a gift that allows her to influence the outcome of situations, a gift so subtle she herself is still unaware of it. She insists she has no gift except exceptionally good luck."

"And your suggestion that they talk freely about what happened to us," Jasper said, "that was insurance?"

"You could say so. It can't hurt to have the vampire world aware that the Volturi have promised to leave us in peace."

Knowing we would soon be ending our extended journey and settling back into a semi-permanent home made the last part of our vacation even more enjoyable. We all seemed at ease, enjoying London but talking hopefully about the upcoming semester, our new location, and things we could get back to after a lengthy separation. My excellent but completely falsified school records had ensured me a place in university, where I was signed up to major in English Literature, as was Edward, mainly so we wouldn't have to be separated even for an hour at a time, but also because he'd never chosen that major before.

Tanya had decided to give college a try this year, majoring in creative writing, in keeping with her cover story. Jasper, to my slight surprise, was studying Theology, and Alice, art history. Esme was studying music part time at a fine arts college in a neighbouring town, and Emmett and Rosalie would be in yet another college, studying French Language and Literature and Forensic Studies, respectively. We were a very well rounded group.

Several things struck me as we planned our journey back to the States. Everyone's excitement about being in college once again, about being in a regular home once again, combined with an unfailing interest in every day's new sights to see, new jokes to tell, new songs to hear and dances to do, were striking in people who had done all this many, many times. Even Edward's and my eagerness to be together nonstop after almost two years of marriage, brought home to me what I'd been told so often before. We wouldn't get tired of things. What we found fascinating at the time of our transformation would never lose its appeal. Travelling would always be as exciting as the first time; family time would always be as enjoyable; music always as pleasing. Edward and I would always be as madly in love, as fascinated, as passionate, as we had been on that first night together after my transformation. I'd known that for some time, but it had never struck me before with such force. It was probably the least human thing about us, but I couldn't begin to regret it. From now on, every day was the day we fell in love; every night our wedding night.

After another few weeks of exploring the British Isles, enjoying the plays and concerts London had to offer, and doing still more shopping, we were ready for our departure. We reserved our plane tickets, paying hefty fees for excess luggage, and I experienced my first transatlantic flight. By prior agreement, Edward and I took a separate plane to New Hampshire, where we took care of gathering the items left in storage, hiring a van, buying a number of replacement items for the house, and driving everything on to Minnesota, Edward behind the wheel of the van, and me driving my little Ferrari, whose title had been signed over to the newly created Jane Masen.

Driving without stopping, except to fill the gas tank, took less than twenty-four hours. When we pulled up at the huge, slightly Italianate style brick house, furniture was being moved inside and arranged. The window trim looked freshly painted and shrubberies had been planted along the front porch. "It's so great!" I exclaimed. "It's very different from the last house, or the one in Forks."

"So it is," Esme agreed. "I like to work with different styles from time to time. Besides, it's one of the few houses in the area that was big enough for our family, and also in a fairly secluded spot." The house was not far from St. Paul, but a little out of the way. No close neighbours, which was to be preferred.

Edward and I joined in the unloading, and the house was furnished and arranged within the hour, barring a few new items that had to be delivered.

Edward and I were given the one large bedroom on the partial third floor. "Being the closest to newlywed," Emmett said, smirking, "you two get the most private quarters."

I ignored him, although I wasn't unhappy about the relative privacy. "Esme, the room is perfect," I told her. Our third floor hideaway was decorated in a beautifully simple style, like Shaker style but lighter and prettier. It had a warm feel to it.

"I'm glad, dear; but it was Rosalie who decorated your room." She smiled at my surprised look. "She insisted."

"I wanted to try my hand at coming up with a room from scratch. Glad you like it," Rosalie said to me casually. "Welcome home. You too, Edward."

"Thank you, Rose," I said, running over and hugging her hard. "Maybe I'll do the same for you some time," I joked.

She laughed. "Warn me ahead of time, okay?"

Rosalie still made fun of me regularly. I didn't mind in the least. It was a big sister thing.

"We've looked over the college campus," Emmett said. "Both colleges. We should be able to go even if there's periodic sunshine. Lots of shaded routes from the parking lot to the lecture halls."

"Good," Edward said. "How are the Bohemians doing? Have you been to their house?"

Everyone laughed. "Wait 'til you see it!" Rosalie exclaimed. "It's this experimental house consisting of a series of geodesic domes and tunnels. It was designed by some architect from New Mexico, who built it for a pesticide tycoon."

"Sounds perfect for their cover story," I ventured. "Eccentric house for eccentric people."

"True!" Esme said. "And the location is perfect, too. On a road nobody uses any more since they extended the highway, and only a short distance from us."

"How did you like the drive from New Hampshire?" Alice asked me. "You got here fast enough. You must be enjoying your Ferrari."

"I am," I admitted. "It's too bad we couldn't drive together," I said to Edward. "Like on our honeymoon."

Edward chuckled. "Now that you've been to Paris, I thought you might find our honeymoon a little lacking in romance."

"Not in the least," I said firmly. "European cities may come and go, but we'll always have Smithers."

He laughed. "And we'll always have Forks. The most beautiful place on earth."

I couldn't disagree.


	23. Time

_Hi Rachel,_  
_How is the new school year going for you so far? Is your class any less unruly now that you've been in charge for a couple of weeks?_  
_I'm just starting the new semester here at Colorado State. Biology major this time, with the idea of eventually doing pre-med and medical school. Years ago, Carlisle suggested I might like helping him with his DNA research._  
_Thanks for the great book recommendations..._

* * *

_Dear Rachel,_  
_Congratulations! That's fantastic news! I'm sorry about the morning sickness, though. I hope it goes away before too long. What does Paul think? I'll bet he's over the moon. Are you hoping for a boy or a girl? Keep me informed..._

* * *

_Hi Rachel,_  
_How are little Nathan and the baby sister doing? I should stop calling her 'baby sister' I suppose; she's in kindergarten now. I loved your stories about this year's senior class. I wish I'd had a teacher like you when I was in school._  
_I finally finished my residency. It was a rough year; I had to keep finding ways to avoid being around blood. I just have the final eight hour exam, which should be pretty easy by comparison, and my license to practice should be forthcoming. I'm still thinking about going on to a residency training programme in a medical specialty. I don't think I could handle a surgical specialty, like my father in law, so my options are a little bit limited. I might study medical genetics. It was genetic research that got me interested in medicine in the first place._  
_Yes, I finally gave in and got a tablet; it was unavoidable. I know books are books, but to be honest, I don't think I'll ever lose my attachment to the ink-and-paper kind..._

* * *

_Dear Rachel,_  
_I'm so awfully sorry to hear about your dad. I'm glad you and Jacob and Rebecca were all able to be with him at the end. I know you don't need me to tell you he was a great man, a good friend and strong leader. His friendship meant a lot to Charlie. We have had a few differences with Billy but I've always liked and respected him, and so has my family. My sympathy goes out to your whole family. Edward sends his regards. I hope you don't object, we've sent flowers under the name of Platte..._

* * *

_Hi Rachel,_  
_How are the kids enjoying high school? Interesting, your choosing to change positions and teach elementary grades while Nathan and Sarah are in high school. My mom, I recall, always thought it was better if I didn't go to any school where she taught. It can be uncomfortable._  
_Thanks for notifying me about Charlie's retirement. It was wonderful the way the whole community turned up to wish him well. He probably never realized how much of an impact he had on Forks, or how highly they thought of him. The retirement party probably embarrassed him to death, but I'm still glad they did it._  
_We're about to leave on an extended trip through South America, somewhere I've never seen before. We're stopping briefly in Virginia because my father in law wants to look in on an old friend of his, someone named Garrett. Alice seems to foresee something about Garrett, but she won't tell us what. Could get interesting..._

* * *

_Hi Rachel,_  
_How's Nathan doing in college? Brilliantly, I'm sure. In answer to your question, we are familiar with the Pacific Northwest Trust. It's a private fund that has provided scholarships to deserving students in your area for many years. You're right, it's the same fund that provided Seth Clearwater with an education. I'm sure the funding was issued out of the greatest possible respect for the students and their families, and in the knowledge that it was making an investment in the community's future. The founder of the trust would understand, I'm certain, that there are times when you just can't help but give to such a worthy cause._  
_Kate and Garrett are back from their second honeymoon, and we're all leaving next month for a tour of Scandinavia, a place we've never explored properly. We're staying through the summer and coming back for the fall semester..._

* * *

_Dear Rachel,_  
_Thank you for letting me know about Charlie. I'm glad he didn't suffer. I worried for years about him getting hurt or killed at work, and I'm sure his wife did too, only to have him die in his sleep. If Sue doesn't mind, I'd like to take care of the funeral costs and cover the grave marker and so forth. Could you pass along my condolences and ask her if it's okay, and let me know?_  
_It was so good to hear from you what he said about me, when my name happened to come up. Well, good and bad. I had a very hard time forgiving myself for leaving him years ago. I know some of your neighbours had an even harder time forgiving me. Because of the way I am now, that never completely goes away, but I can set it aside for very long periods. Hearing about his death brings it all out again, like it was yesterday. It was the same way two years ago, when Mom died. It will take a while for me to put those feelings away again..._

* * *

_Hi Rachel,_  
_A thousand congratulations on Nathan's engagement! I hope the girl is good enough for him. If she meets with your approval, she must be. I'm forwarding a wedding present; tell him that it's from some old college friend or whatever you like. I wish them a long and happy life together._  
_Edward and I just celebrated our thirty-sixth wedding anniversary, and I still love him the same way I did the day we were married. I'm sure you and Paul know how that is. I hope your son and his bride will have the same joy and unity we've been privileged to share..._

* * *

_Hi Rachel,_  
_Just finished another move. We're in Wyoming now, in a lovely area in a perpetually shady valley. I'm attaching some pictures of the area._  
_Congratulations on your retirement, and best of luck. It sounds like you've got plenty to do with your spare time, especially with grandchildren on the way..._

* * *

_Dear Rachel,_  
_I'm so sorry about Paul. Nothing I can say would be adequate; it must be a terrible loss. Let me know if there's anything I can do..._

* * *

_Dear Jacob,_  
_Thank you for letting me know about Rachel. There was nobody else to notify me if you hadn't written. We were friends a long time - real friends, I think, even though we only communicated from a distance all these years. It's hard to think of her not being there any more. My condolences to you and Rebecca, and please pass along my regards to Leah. I hope losing Rachel will not be too hard on all of you. She had a long, happy life..._  
_  
_


	24. We Meet Again

"Who are _they_?"

I heard the question over the continual murmur and occasional yell or screech of hundreds of adolescent voices. I looked at Edward to see if he'd heard as well; he caught my eye with a smile. "New kid," he whispered, imperceptibly to anyone but the six at our table. "He's asking about us."

Our eyes sought each other again, and we became lost for a moment. A century hadn't dulled the intensity of looking into Edward's eyes. So beautiful, so wonderful in every way, and mine, all mine. I wished we could just get up and leave the school at that moment, run together to our meadow...

Jasper made a faint noise, like a cough. "Could you bear in mind," he murmured, "that you're supposed to be siblings?"

I looked away. "Sorry, Jasper." The sibling thing may have been a mistake. We usually chose cover stories that identified us as four couples, of one description or another. Even with many years of experience at dissembling, it was sometimes hard to disguise the real nature of our relationship.

"The Plattes," the new kid's informant was explaining. "Their dad's a doctor at the hospital here, and their mom is some kind of city planner. She volunteers to do something or other for the town council."

"Esme would be gratified to know her work is so appreciated by the local youth," Edward said, and most of us smiled. Rosalie was ignoring us and everything around her. She found our time in the cafeteria especially tedious.

"They're very good looking, aren't they?" the new boy said. "Especially the blonde girl."

That, Rosalie heard; she smiled faintly. A former lifetime of being trained to see beauty as her primary, if not her only, virtue had left an indelible mark, one that would never really change. I was glad the little tribute eased her irritable boredom a bit.

"Yeah. They just moved here in the summer." That seemed to imply an explanation of our appearance: we were from somewhere else, where people were better looking.

"Where are they from?" new boy was asking. Keith, I should call him; Keith Burdon. Everybody in this small school was aware of the new boy from Philadelphia. His arrival at school today was the focus of their attention. I remembered, vaguely, and my sympathies went out to the kid. I could see the others at my table were tuning in to Keith's conversation.

"California," the informant - Asher Crowley, descendant of a former classmate - reported. "Near Los Angeles someplace. Lord knows what they're doing in Forks."

"Asher tends to romanticize large cities," Edward said quietly. "As he sees it, glamour increases with population density."

"I could point out some urban centres that would challenge that assumption," Jasper said.

"They're all pretty close to the same age, aren't they?" Keith asked, sneaking a look at us. "How can they be brothers and sisters?"

"Oh, they're all adopted or foster kids or something," Asher said. "The Plattes are too young to have kids that age. But it's funny how they look alike."

"Some of them are related, that's why," a girl at their table put in. "They adopted nieces or nephews first, and then started adopting other kids. That's what I heard."

"And if you think _they're_ good looking," another girl added, "you should see their parents. The _father_...!" She pretended to fall forward onto the table in a dead faint. The first girl giggled.

"They're all honour students," Asher remarked with a touch of resentment in his voice.

"Yeah," one of the girls - called Dolores, a name that was currently and inexplicably popular - added, "even though they miss a lot of school."

"Do they?" Keith, the new boy, asked. "Why? Are they sick?"

"No, on nice days their parents take them out hiking and camping and stuff. The school doesn't mind, I guess, since they all get straight A's anyway. They go hunting a lot, too."

"Deer hunting," Dolores confirmed. "But it's weird, they hardly ever eat deer meat. They have the carcasses butchered and the meat donated to charity."

"Long enough?" Alice asked. We rose, gathering our largely untouched lunch trays. The contents were different from when we were last here, in keeping with changing tastes and food trends. We carried seaweed wraps, raw vegetables with yogurt and hemp seed dip, and sparkling carrot-pineapple juice. And pizza, of course. Pizza never even came close to going out of style. We dumped the food in the biodegration unit, placed the containers in their proper recycling bins, and left the cafeteria.

I noticed Alice glancing down at my shoes, then at her own. "Admit it," I said to her, "they're nice."

Alice had been annoyed when high heels made their complete, and apparently permanent, retirement from the fashion world, many decades ago. Her irritation was mitigated when people of both sexes began introducing creativity into their flat-heeled footwear. Students here at Forks High School could be seen wearing woollen pixie slippers, floral canvas ankle boots, shoes in paisley, polka dots, and beadwork, many of them with little ceramic animals attached to the instep as mascots, a current fad. Alice's shoes were made of a kind of silvery mesh and had a lacy frill around the ankle, like an Elizabethan ruff, while mine were red velvet with little rosettes on each toe and a tiny lion figurine attached to the left ankle strap. "They're okay," she conceded. "At least there's a wide range of possibilities." She led the way out the door, giving her feet one more admiring glance.

Since students here were now allowed to go outside during their lunch hour, we usually brought a prop lunch with us from home and sat out in the grassy area adjoining the school. It made the lunch break easier. Today it was raining, however; and although the rain wouldn't bother us, humans stayed indoors in this weather. Hanging around outside in the rain would attract attention. Instead, we collected our books for the afternoon and walked down the corridor to the school's library and study hall. The world-class Charles Swan Memorial Library, funded by an anonymous donor, had been added years ago, when the school had been rebuilt. Nobody would be surprised to see the Platte kids there, apparently studying, when most of the student body were relaxing in the cafeteria. How else would we keep our impeccable grades?

"No concerns?" Jasper asked Edward as we sat down at a large table.

"No, nothing out of the ordinary. Curiosity about us, about where we live. Some silly speculation about where we got all our money. It's conjectured that Alice is the secret abandoned daughter of some celebrity she apparently resembles. Otherwise, nothing."

"We've only been here a few weeks," Emmett said. "Give them time."

We chatted, textbooks open in front of us, until the five minute bell rang. "Spanish," Rosalie sighed, rising from her chair. "I wish this teacher wasn't so keen on class participation. We're supposed to working in teams of two, one making a speech and the other doing simultaneous translation."

"I'm going to talk about the life cycle of plankton," Emmett said. "'_Plancton en el Mito, la Leyenda y la Poesía_'."

"That should keep them on the edge of their seats," Alice remarked. "Come on, Jazz. World History awaits." They walked side by side down the corridor. The couples had all arranged, one way or another, to be in classes together. It made the day more pleasant.

Edward and I took our places in the Biology lab at the far end of the building, just before the bell rang. "Take out your slates," the teacher called out as he entered the room. The electronic tablets that acted as textbook, notebook, study guide, and homework distributor, were known by the deliberately anachronistic nickname of _slates_. I thought it was cute. "I've forwarded an outline for today's examination of the carbon cycle." A subject Edward and I were already more than familiar with.

"Still my favourite class," Edward whispered.

At three thirty, we filed out the door along with the rest of the student body, pulling on hats as we went. Another fashion trend that pleased Alice was the return of headgear for both men and women. I was wearing something similar to a cloth newsboy's cap, Alice a sort of shallow-brimmed pink cloche hat with a little bow on the side, and Rosalie wore something that very much resembled a spoon bonnet. The boys wore the typical fedora-style hats the male students favoured, the modern version in a wide variety of colours and patterns, many of them with the ubiquitous little animal figures hanging from the hatband or the brim. There was no predicting where fashion might choose to go. Even Alice had trouble with it.

Most of the kids headed for the public transit station near the road, only a few to the parking lot. Cars were less common than they had been during our previous residence here. Fortunately for the Cullens, privately owned automobiles were not quite unusual enough to attract attention. The other four hopped into their solar-powered Ziara, one of the sportier models from the flourishing Slovakian auto industry. "Baseball tonight!" Alice called from the car as Rosalie headed for the exit. We waved as they drove off, and climbed into my own little red Sumrak two-seater. We had errands to run.

I drove into Port Angeles to pick up the hardware items Esme had ordered, necessary for finishing touches on our house. Our original house, the big white three-storey one, was occupied at present, but we'd found another we liked almost as well, in an equally secluded spot outside the Forks town limits. We took our time, strolling through the downtown area and reminiscing a little. La Bella Italia was gone, the site now occupied by a dental office, but Edward pointed out the spot, the place where he'd first allowed me to know who and what he was.

We returned to Forks and purchased the weekly grocery order for the family, part of keeping our cover story intact. We tried to buy mostly non-perishable food, which we'd pack up and drop off, secretly and by night, at charitable institutions in surrounding communities. By the time we'd finished and packed the groceries in the trunk, the sun was setting.

"Can we make a stop?" I asked, as we drove past the graveyard. "I've been meaning to since we moved here. Would you mind?"

"Of course not, love."

I parked and we got out. It took a few minutes to locate Charlie's grave. The marble headstone I'd purchased, long ago, was still intact, the words still legible. _Beloved husband, father, and friend_. The grave itself, I noticed, was surprisingly well cared for. Sue's grave wasn't here; she was buried beside Harry, in keeping with tradition; maybe for her children's sake. "I thought of coming back at some point, just to see him. Without his seeing me, of course."

"Are you sorry you didn't?"

"No. It was best. It's not like we could have talked or anything. Besides...I'll always love Charlie, but he belonged to my other life. You can't go back across the Styx, you know?" He nodded.

I found Rachel's and Paul's graves, side by side, and smiled as I ran through our many years of long-distance conversation in my mind. Their headstones were smaller, but Rachel was remembered still, in the name of the reservation school's library. Another anonymous donor had seen to it.

"She meant a lot to you," Edward said.

"Yes, I guess she did. She was the only human friend I was able to keep. Special circumstances."

Then we came across two more graves, also side by side. "Wow. This is an odd experience," I said, looking down at the pair of granite stones with the all too familiar names engraved on them.

Edward stood, an arm around my shoulders, watching me, trying to gauge my emotions. "Are you all right, love?"

I nodded. I found that I really was; better than all right. "Let's go for a run," I suggested. "Just a little one. We're not needed back home right away, are we?"

He smiled. "No, I don't think so. Let's go."

I parked the car near the trailhead of one of the more rugged paths through the Olympic National Forest. The darkness and the rain ensured the area would be deserted, and we chased each other joyfully through the trees. The pleasure of running, gracefully and at blinding speed, never lost its charm for me, any more than being with Edward did.

On our way back, Edward suddenly froze, looking intently ahead into the forest. An instant later I picked up the repellant scent and stood still beside him. As we watched, first one, then a second enormous wolf climbed over a rocky crest and into sight. Both were shaggy, one russet, the other slightly smaller and with grey fur. They stood and looked at us a moment, then turned and ran back into the trees.

"They're coming right back," Edward told me. "They're going to phase, and put some clothing on."

"Is everything all right?" I asked nervously. "We haven't crossed the boundary." I'd been shown the borders of Quileute land on our arrival in Forks, and had carefully avoided even going near it.

"No, everything's fine. They just want to talk. To say hello."

"Oh! That's...unexpected."

"They seem to have gotten past their dislike of us. Not of vampires in general, but of us and our family. I'm not sure why, but their attitude has evolved."

We waited. A short time later, two human figures emerged from where the wolves had run, barefoot and dressed in loose shorts and tee shirts, clothing most humans would find inadequate in the cold drizzle and the chilly night air. They walked side by side, holding hands. The man was large and strongly built, with a handsome, open face; the woman tall and willowy, with lovely features, long lashes and high cheekbones. Both were beautiful; both had the same long, straight, inky black hair, the same dark eyes. I vaguely recognized them both from my cloudy human memories.

Their movements seemed synchronized, as if they were held in orbit around one another; and when they looked at each other it was with an expression of serene pleasure. They were like something from mythology come to life: perfect, eternal mates.

They walked toward us from a distance, at leisurely human speed, and as we waited for them to reach us, my mind automatically pieced together minor facts, drawing conclusions in my _elementary_ way.

First, I saw that they weren't just _like_ something from a legend; they actually were part of a legend. I felt sure that now, when the Quileute met to recount old stories, there were new additions. They would tell of the time they made an alliance with some of the Cold Ones, honourable ones who did not kill humans, in order to fight off others. And they would conclude by adding that two members of that wolf pack, a man and a woman, had become husband and wife and continued to take on wolf form and protect the Quileute people, and all people near their territory. The story would conclude, as many stories did, "and so they still do, to this very day." Most of those listening would think it was only a fable; others would believe it was a metaphor, a symbolic way of talking about aspects of tribal history. Only a few of the elders would remain aware of the truth, seeing Jacob and Leah live on the reserve until their perpetual youth became too prolonged, then move a short distance away, coming back again when a new generation was in place. As others came and went, they continued their work, protecting their people, supporting themselves by moving from job to job as their identity changed, doing so joyfully because they were together.

Second, I realized that Rachel hadn't been the last human friend I would ever have, after all. Jacob was a friend from my human life, and he could know me as I was, due to his particularly special circumstances. So could Leah, if she wanted to. I felt sure she would. Leah's lovely face was no longer marred by a permanent scowl. She was happy and at peace, and I was sure that any friend of her Jacob's would be her own friend as well.

I began to describe my thoughts to Edward, then took the simpler route and lifted my shield so he could see for himself. He nodded thoughtfully. "Yes, I see. And you're right: they're both prepared to offer us their friendship."

The couple reached us. Their faces were strange, in a way: full of too much experience for people so apparently young. They were filled with more than a century of life, and not a century such as I'd lived, gaining experience but still frozen in place, forever keeping the perspective I'd had at eighteen. They had grown and matured in the way only humans can, but without aging physically. I was a little in awe of them.

Then Jacob smiled, the same wide, happy, slightly smart aleck smile I could still remember, and suddenly he wasn't so imposing any more. Leah gave us a warm smile and raised a hand in friendly greeting - the first friendly greeting I'd ever received from her, but not the last, I was certain.

"So," Jacob said casually, "you're back."


End file.
